#lot ff

John let out a small laugh and then answer to her. “That,” he approved and then continued “and the avoiding.”

“I am not avoiding you,” Zari answered a bit too fast for her liking.

“Sure you don’t,” John said sarcastic, knowing very well she was lying. “What do you want me to say?” he continued, watching her.

“Oh, I don’t know… what about…” she put a finger on her chin and pretended to think for a second. “What about ‘I am sorry, Zari, for choosing to side with a maniac who came back from hell instead of my friends, when it came to bringing back our dead teammate and your brother’? I think that would work perfectly,” Zari snapped at him.

“I have a debt, Zari. To Astra,” John snapped back.

Zari put both of her hands on the table and leaned forward, “My brother is dead, John! Because of you! You have a bigger dept to me that to that red pantsuit lady,” Zari said with a cold voice.”

“She died because of me!” John snapped at her again, “When she was a kid!” he continued.

Taken back with his response, Zari blinked a few times in shock and then talked again.

“What?” she said in a small voice.

John took another sip from the bottle and with a deep sigh he started to talk.

“Astra was in hell since she was a kid because of my own mistakes. She grew in there. Using the loom to bring back her mother will also change the past for her. She will grow up a normal human. With her mother and her family,” John said not looking at her and letting his head drop, “I own that to her. Forever,” he finished.

Realizing she judged too hard, without knowing all the details, Zari put her hand on his hand, “John, I am sorry,” she said, with all her heart, “I didn’t know.”

“I will regret what I did to her forever,” John said, raising his eyes and looking at her, “just as much as I will regret forever that your brother is dead because of me.”

“We will get them back, right? Both of them… Behrad, Astra’s mom...”

“That we will, Z.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes, Zari thinking about the confession John told her. John on the other hand, went back to staring into the void. She didn’t know there was a deeper story in why John is trying to save Astra’s mom. She just assumed he was doing it because of a deal he made with her, so that Astra won’t kill everyone on the ship. But there was more to the story and right now she felt a bit guilty for judging everything too quickly. Astra was a girl looking to be reunited with her family. Just as Zari was.

Thinking about Astra, Zari remembered something Astra told her earlier that day.

“You want to know something?” Zari said with a smile on her face, making John to pay attention to her once again. When she was sure he was back with her and paying attention to her, Zari started to talk again, “Astra believes I think I have you wrapped around my finger.”

John let out a scoff and replied to her with a smile, “And what do you think, love?”

“I don’t know… what do you think?” Zari asked him playfully.

John nodded at her and then answered to her, “You have a certain charm, I have to admit.”

“I know that,” Zari said with a grin, “but is this charm working on you?” she asked, leaning closer to him.

“I won’t answer to that,” John said, refusing to tell her what she wanted him to tell her.

Zari knew herself, she knew she was charming men everywhere she went, making them turn their heads to her. And she knew she had that effect on John as well. She saw it after their little play of Romeo and Juliet and she saw it again when they were stuck in the past with a bunch of serial killers.

“History shows this charm of mine might work on you as well, John Constantine,” Zari told him, leaning even more towards him.

John raised a finger and started to talk again, “Careful love, you are no longer Cleopatra to play men like that,” he said with a small smile.

“Men? There’s only you,” Zari said, gesturing with her hand around the empty room.

“And Nate,” John answered with a serious face this time.

Zari leaned back in her chair, her smile dissapereing from her face. She was having a good time with John, not thinking about Nate and his crush on the previous Zari.

“I didn’t mean it to sound like that,” John took his words back, after seeing her reaction to mentioning Nate.

“I am not playing anyone, John,” Zari answered serious, “Nate is cute. Nice. He’s a fun guy to be around, but do I look interested in him in anyway?” she said with a raised eyebrow.

“I am not the one who has the answer to that,” John replied to her.

Zari sighed and answered to him, “I am not. I am not the other Zari, from another time, from another timeline. I am another person completely and I can’t fall in love with someone just based on the things a past Zari once felt,” Zari said every word strongly, making sure he gets the message behind her words, “I am my own person, John.”

“No one dictates you what to do and how to feel, Z,” John said with honesty in his voice.

Zari smiled at him again, knowing he understood what she was trying to say, “Good. Because I want to be able to do what I want, when I want it, how I want it,” she said leaning towards him once again.

This time, John leaned towards her too. The moment reminded her of their small moment from a few days ago, when they almost kissed before finding the last ring and before being, rudely interrupted, by Ava and Nate.

When John’s face was close enough to hers, but still keeping a respectful distance, he stopped and asked her in a low voice, “And what do you want, Zari?”

“Right now?” Zari asked, starting to play with the ever present red tie around his neck. “Right now, I remember I have one unfinished business,” she said, pulling him a bit closer to her face “a business that I would very much like to finish,” she finished talking.

They were nose to nose now, their lips inches apart, him still waiting for her to make the first move. Zari felt her heart started to beat faster at the prospect of finally kissing him again, for the first time since their Romeo and Juliet play.

Making up her mind, Zari closed her eyes and decided to take the last move and press her lips on his… when a loud noise came from the hallway, followed by a curse. Zari let out a deep sight annoyed at the interruption at the same time she felt John’s lips starting to move, followed by a soft curse from him.

John leaned back an inch and looked at her, “Maybe it’s not the best time to... finish the business,” John said in a low voice.

Zari nodded, “Another time, then,” she said as footsteps started to hear louder on the hallway and much closer to them.

“Another time indeed,” John said leaning back in the chair, putting back the distance between them just as Nate appeared in the doorframe.

“Oh hey, guys!” Nate saluted them when he saw Zari and John were in the kitchen.

“Mate!” John raised his head to look at Nate, over Zari’s head, “What are you doing here?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” Nate said, entering in the room and sitting in the chair right across from John. “I keep having these dreams of the hellhound. Maybe I am possessed,” Nate continued to talk with a rapid voice. “John! Am I possessed?” Nate said, with a sudden excitement in his voice.

“Doubtfully mate,” John answered with a grin.

Zari listened for a few more minutes the bickering between Nate and John, hoping that Nate will eventually get tired and leave but when she realised that won’t happen anytime soon she announced the guys that she’s going back to her room to try and get some sleep.

“I am gonna leave you guys, I need my beauty sleep” she said taking her water bottle and smiling at both of them.

“Night night Z! Sweet dreams!” Nate said with a small smile on his face at the same time John answered a calmly, “Good night, Zari.”

Zari raised from the table and started to walk towards the door. Before leaving for good, she turned towards the boys one more time. While Nate was with his back at the door, he didn’t saw her as he continued to talk with John. What surprised her more, was that John was following her with his eyes and when he realised she was watching him too, he smiled at her and winked at her.

_________________________________

Notes:

Any kind of feedback is welcomed. This was supposed to be a fic about the promo pics we got for episode 13, especially the pics in the bus and the small scene from the promo where John protects Zari from the zombies, but then I realised we miss something from between episodes 11 and 12 so I went with that. But hey! If you liked this... Let me know... with a kudos or a comment on AO3, or in any way in here, anything really. 

They were mostly all on task, but Oliver couldn’t keep himself from watching Sara with her daughter. She was very good at multitasking, although this wasn’t new information to him, balancing Rory on her hip as she poured over building schematics.

He couldn’t ignore the tingling nerves in the back of his mind at the baby’s presence. He’d never even brought his own children — three year old twins Tommy and Mara — to the Arrowcave, but he wasn’t about to tell someone what to do with their own kid (especially when one of those someones was Sara Lance).

Still, there was something about it that Oliver found…unnerving.

“Are you sure it’s okay she’s here?” Oliver had asked when they had first arrived.

“Yeah,” Sara had replied, “What could happen?”

“You do know we’re trying to take down a serial murderer, right?”

“We have Donna on retainer if things start heading south,” she shrugged.

And that had been the end of that.

Then Oliver was worried that Rory would be a distraction to their crusade, but after a couple days he had to admit he was wrong about this one too.

Rory proved to be a remarkably easy baby. She hardly ever cried, napped most of the day, and was quiet when she was awake (his surprise may be coming from experience with his own baby girl, Mara, who screamed nearly nonstop from the day she was born to the moment she learned to speak). The only distraction Rory caused came from the adults on the team, especially his wife Felicity.

Often, when the two teams were out in Star City, Felicity remained in the Arrowcave with Rory.

“How is she?” Sara asked over the comms.

“She’s doing great,” Felicity told her, “She woke up a few minutes ago and I swear she’s the cutest baby I’ve ever seen in my entire life — aww, she’s sucking on her fingers and it’s so cute I could cry. Hang on, I’ll send you pictures.”

“Felicity,” Oliver interrupted, “How are those security feeds looking?”

“Oh right,” she exclaimed.

Later, when they had all returned to the Arrowcave, Felicity approached him and draped her arms around his neck.

“I want another baby,” she whined.

Oliver followed her line of sight to Sara, sitting in Felicity’s desk chair and slowing rotating side to side with her baby in her arms.

“Really?” Oliver asked, “Because earlier this week you said that if someone gave you the right price, you’d sell the ones we already have.”

“I obviously was kidding,” she replied, “Look at them.”

He looked back to Sara and her daughter. Oliver had to admit that there was something enrapturing about watching a mother and her baby, seeing the purest love in her eyes. He’d seen it with Felicity, but now their kids moved so quickly and it was hard to capture those moments.

“You really want to do all that again?” he asked, meeting Felicity’s eyes again, “Being pregnant, labor, the screaming newborn, diapers — we just got Tommy and Mara out of diapers.”

A bit of the longing left Felicity’s eyes.

“Maybe…maybe I just want to watching them. Forever,” she said. Her eyes widened and she shook her head, “Was that creepy? I didn’t mean it to be creepy.”

Sara got up, cradling Rory in her arms, and walked over to them.

“Do you want her for a little bit, Fliss,” she asked, holding Rory towards her, “It kinda sounds like you need it.”

Felicity took Rory, holding her close to her chest.

“Ugh, I miss this,” she groaned, “I know everyone says this, but it’s true. You have to cherish this time, Sara, when she’s all squishy and cuddly and falls asleep in your arms because mine used to do that and now they don’t and I don’t know when it happened.”

“I know,” Sara replied, a smile on her face.

A moment later, Leonard walked over to stand beside her.

“Hi,” Sara said, smiling fondly up at him as she lifted one of his arms and draped it around her shoulders.

“We’re supposed to be at your dad’s house in fifteen minutes,” he said, leaning over to kiss her cheek.

Felicity moved to give Rory back and Leonard took her, bouncing her a few times before she settled in his arms.

“I’m gonna get her ready to go,” he said. Sara nodded as he started to turn away.

“I know our work isn’t done yet,” Oliver told her, “but I just wanted to thank you for coming here to help us. I know this stuff can be hard with a baby. I really appreciate it.”

“It’s no problem,” Sara replied, “We’re happy to help.”

“You should know that I am very proud of you,” he continued.

“Why?” Sara asked.

“You and I were both in really dark places years ago, and now here we are,” he replied

“Here we are,” Sara repeated, looking over to where Leonard was sitting with Rory, chuckling at something Laurel was saying.

“For a really long time, I thought having people you loved in your life made you weaker, but I was wrong,” Oliver said, “I know I never thought I’d end up here, with a wife and kids, but I am, and I’ve never been happier. I see the same in you.”

Sara smiled.

Leonard walked up to them again, this time carrying Rory. She was now wearing a dark grey fleece onesie with little round ears on the hood.

“Your sister had another gift for Rory,” Leonard said, holding her up so Sara could see.

“Aww,” Sara said, taking Rory form him and planting a kiss on her cheek, “Are you my baby bear?” she cooed, swaying back and forth.  She saw Felicity groan and bury her face in Oliver’s jacket.

“We should probably go,” Sara said, looking up at Leonard, “if only just for Felicity’s sake.”

Dollar beers.

Mick’s words, rough and jagged, floated into his mind like a bubble.

One. Two. Three. Four.

Avery, her voice high and sweet.

Gotta love the seventies.

Mick again.

The seventies?

An image flickered into Leonard’s mind of a bar he had never been in, an old jukebox in the corner, a deer head mounted on a tall post, red, knotty wood making up almost every surface, and Sara standing in front of him.

Her hair was longer than he remembered, and she was wearing some sort of costume? Something he’d never seen before: white and leather with a halter neck.

Suit yourself.

Sara handed him her beer, the bottle cold in the palm of his hand.

Recognition flooded his mind as the White Canary walked into the empty space of the bar in St. Roch, Louisiana, 1975.

He and Sara and Mick had all just joined the time traveling mission to save time from Vandal Savage. They were benched from the first mission, so they crashed a bar.

They weren’t benched from other missions though. He remembered breaking into Savage’s house with Mick and…tall…painfully optimistic…Ray. He remembers the rest of the team now, Kendra, Jax, Stein, and Rip, their captain. He remembers breaking Mick and Ray out of a Russian gulag. He remembers nearly freezing in the cargo hold of the Waverider, Mick’s betrayal and return, pointing the cold gun at Sara. He remembers holding down the failsafe at the Oculus Wellspring.

Me and you.

You wanna steal a kiss from me, Leonard.

Leonard.

“Leonard!”

The voice was louder now, solid, and certainly not Sara’s.

Snart!”

It’s lower, a man’s, but not as low as Mick’s, somewhere in the middle.

His eyes opened and he could see again, for the first time since the wedding.

His wedding.

His vision focused and he recognized the med bay on the Waverider, clean and painfully bright.

Ray Palmer stood beside the bed.

“You’re awake!” he exclaimed. His face was as bright as ever, but there was still concern in his eyes.

“Thanks for letting me know,” he grumbled, pushing himself into a more upright position.

There was a beat of silence.

“What happened?” he finally asked.

He hadn’t wanted to say it, to admit to Raymond and himself the position of vulnerability he was in.

“We’re not really sure,” Ray answered, looking intently at the screen displaying his vitals, “You, y’know, died when the Oculus blew up, or at least that’s what we thought. A year and half went by without any sign of you and then all of a sudden Gideon started freaking out and then we found you passed out in an alley behind some bar in Louisiana, 1975.”

Another second of silence.

“What happened?”

This time it was Ray who asked.

“I mean,” he continued, “did you get sucked into the timeline? Because that’s what I think happened.”

“No, I don’t think so.”

“Or maybe destroying the Oculus reset your timeline or, what do you think?” Ray paused when he realized Leonard wasn’t responding, “Hey, are you okay?”

“I need to talk to Rip,” he said, “Alone.”

Confusion etched itself across Ray’s face, but he hid it surprisingly well.

Leonard wasn’t surprised by his concern. The more he came to remember who he was here, on the Waverider, the more he recognized that genuinely seeking out their captain was extremely out of character.

“Rip is,” Ray hesitated, “not here.”

“Not here?”

“Look, I know it’s been a while, but—”

“Who’s Captain, then?”

“Sara.”

Leonard felt a pang in her heart at her name.

“Oh.”

“But I’ve been working pretty closely with Gideon,” Ray said hurriedly, “I can try to help.”

Leonard said nothing, gesturing for him to continue.

“I assume you want to figure out what happened. You are aware of how you…” he paused, “…left us — I guess died isn’t really the best word now.”

“The Oculus.”

“Right. We thought the Oculus explosion killed you. Gideon never found any traces of your survival, so we just assumed you had died. We did have some other theories, so we set up an alert if you ever turned up anywhere. Eighteen months later, here we are.”

“I just, what, showed up?”

“Seems like it,” Ray replied, “in St. Roch, 1975 at the bar you went to with Mick and Sara.”

Leonard let his eyes close at the sound of Sara’s name.

“What?” Ray asked. Leonard opened his eyes and shook his head.

“Where did I come from?” he asked, hearing anger in his voice he hadn’t realized he was feeling.

“We don’t know — not yet anyway. I’m almost afraid to ask, but,” Ray hesitated, “where were you?”

Leonard exhaled heavily.

“I was—” he stopped for a moment, thinking, “I think I was on…not this Earth. Another one. I was me, but things about me were different.”

“Different how?”

“I was still Captain Cold,” he answered, “but I hid who I really was. My sister wasn’t Golden Glider, Mick wasn’t Heatwave — Mick wasn’t around at all really.”

“And you didn’t work on the — a — Waverider, or with anybody on this team?”

“No— well, not entirely.”

“What do you mean?”

“I knew — know — Sara.”

“Oh,” he said, his eyebrows raised, “And you were with her?”

“Yeah, you could say that,” he replied, feeling a smirk creep onto his lips.

“So let me get this straight,” Ray said, starting a slow pace around the med bay, “You have all your memories from your life on this other earth, from childhood to today. And you have all your memories from your life on this Earth?”

“As of ten minutes ago, yes.”

Ray nodded slowly.

“Okay, well, the first thing we did when we got you to the med bay was run a test to see if you are really you — our Earth’s you.”

“And?”

“You are the Earth-One Leonard Snart. The cells in your right hand are younger than the rest of your body, from when you had to regrow it two years ago. According to Gideon, that event is unique to Earth-One Leonard Snart.

“Lucky me.”

“So now we have to ask, how did you end up on another Earth?” Ray continued, “And which Earth was it?”

“You think that’s what happened?”

“Well, my other thought is that you were in a dream world, you know, inside your head, but given how visceral your knowledge of this other life is, I don’t really think that’s the case,” Ray replied. His face clouded over in thought, “Or maybe the aliens.”

“What?”

Rip shook his head.

“Never mind. Probably not. Anyway, we can run a search to figure out what Earth you ended up on, but we’ll need to go to the bridge. Gideon, is Snart okay to make it there alright?”

“Yes, Mr. Palmer, I believe Mr. Snart has recovered enough to not need the services of the medical bay.”

“Perfect.”

Ray took a step back and waited while Leonard got to his feet.

“So,” he said as they walked down the corridor leading to the bridge, “What I think happened is when you destroyed the Oculus, the explosion pulled you into the time stream of another Earth, and you became an anachronism.”

“What’s an anachronism?” Leonard asked drily.

“Man, have you missed a lot,” Ray sighed, “Anachronisms are changes to the timeline that were caused by the ripple effect of other changes. Stein caused an anachronism when he gave his younger self some advice and now he has a daughter, Lily. He has memories of both lives, with and without Lily, same as you with the two Earths.”

“So…” Leonard said, trailing off when he couldn’t find a way to continue.

“I can find the Earth you were on if you want,” Ray suggested.

After a moment of thought, Leonard nodded.

“Okay, so I just need a detail that could be unique to that particular Earth, like how having to regenerate your hand is unique to you,” he explained. By that time, they had reached the bridge, stopping in front of the holo table, “Do you have anything in mind?”

Leonard thought for a while, considering the two worlds he had lived in.

“Avery Lance.”

Ray met his eyes for a moment, but didn’t say anything.

“Gideon,” he called into the air, “Run a multiverse search for Avery Lance in the year 2018.

There was silence for a moment.

“I found records of an Avery Felicity Lance, age four, currently living in Central City on Earth sixty-three.”

Leonard wasn’t listening. A picture had appeared on the holo table — Avery, in a floral print skirt and pink blouse, sandals on her feet, a white bow in her wild curls, and backpack straps over her shoulders. Sara was crouched down at her side and they were both smiling into the camera.

Leonard knew this picture well. It was taken on Avery’s first day of preschool, and sat in a frame on a shelf in the living room.

He thought of Sara and Avery. The new weight of the wedding band on his ring finger had been a constant thought in his mind. He could only hope the mysterious ways of time were protecting them from what was going on, and he was trying to avoid altogether the thought of never returning to them.

“Snart,” Ray said, his voice softer than it had been thus far, “This is Earth-63-Sara’s daughter?” Leonard nodded, “And yours?”

“Not…biologically,” Leonard answered, not taking his eyes off the picture, “but she’s…” he trailed off, trying to find the right words, “I love her like she’s mine.”

“And Sara wasn’t just a business partner.”

“No,” he said, his voice soft, “Our wedding was today.”

He wasn’t sure if he wanted to share that particular part of his life, but at this point it didn’t seem to matter.

“Mazel Tov,” Ray replied somewhat uncomfortably.

“Thanks,” Leonard replied, expressionless.

“Well, Gideon and I are going to figure out how this happened. In the meantime, if you’d like to,” he paused, “reacquaint yourself with the ship and the team, you can.”

Leonard nodded curtly, turned, and headed for the metal doorway.

He’d be lying if he said his memory of the Waverider and its maze of corridors was perfect, but it was starting to come back to him. He made it back to his quarters relatively easily.

The doors opened automatically as he approached, and once inside, he was surrounded by his old belongings, although he wasn’t sure if old was the right word.

There was a frame on a black desk holding a faded photograph of Lisa at her high school graduation. On Earth-63, Leonard had a similar picture from Lisa’s college graduation, but he also knew on this Earth, Earth-1 Lisa hadn’t gone to college, and neither did he.

It was strange, when he first woke up, he had considered what was apparently Earth-63 to be his real Earth, but the longer he was here and the more he remembered, it was beginning to even out. He had lived both, and had memories of both lives. Both of them were real.

Leonard wasn’t sure if that was a reassuring thought. He wondered if he was stuck on this Earth now — although again, stuck didn’t seem like the right word, because there was a part of him that felt relieved to be back. Of course, there was an equally strong part of him that desperately wanted to return to Earth-63. He just wasn’t sure if that was a possibility.

He turned when he heard the sound of knocking on the metal door.

“Hey,” Jax said, taking a step into the room, “How’re you doing?”

“Fine,” he replied.

“I, uh, sort of accidentally overheard you and Ray on the bridge,” he said, “Look, I’m really sorry, man. I really hope we find a way to get you back to Earth-63 and your family, if that’s what you want.”

“So do I,” he replied.

“Have you said hi to the rest of the team yet?”

“No.”

“Well, you should. We missed you around here.”

Jax nodded once, then turned and left the room.

Leonard thought about what Jax had said and found he did want to talk to the team. He found he was beginning to remember the people he worked with for the five months he was on the Waverider before the Oculus. He remembered how much he cared about them. He realized that this was somewhat uncharacteristic for this version of him, but so was self-sacrifice to save all of history, at least it would have been when the mission began. The mission had changed him. He probably wouldn’t have let himself acknowledge that before, but at this point, it seemed sort of futile. He’d changed a lot on Earth-63 as well. It was a good thing. Barry — Earth-63 Barry — had said something only a few hours early which led him to realize that past versions of himself could never have been capable of being loved by Sara Lance. He’d continued to become a better person because of her. perhaps that’s why he drifted to Sara on this Earth as well.

When he’d first woken up, thoughts of returning to Earth-63 and Sara and Avery had nearly consumed him. Those thoughts certainly weren’t gone, but he couldn’t deny there was a part of him that wanted to stay here, on Earth-1. That thought left a somewhat bitter taste in his mouth. He had a wife and a daughter on Earth-63, yet he still felt a desire to stay here. He had unfinished business here, both on this Earth and on the Waverider.

He couldn’t help but think of Lisa. Did the team tell her what happened after the Oculus? Did she think he was dead? Leonard hadn’t bothered to tell her about the Waverider and the mission because he figured they’d return mere minutes after they left.

And what about Mick. He didn’t know why it had taken so long to think of his old friend, his partner, except perhaps that they hadn’t been as close on Earth-63 as they were here.

Either way, Leonard knew the last time they had interacted was when he had knocked Mick out with the cold gun to take his place at the Oculus.

He remember what Jax had said about visiting the team. Leonard sighed and headed for the door.

He remembered where Mick’s room was. He hadn’t gone there particularly often when he was on the ship. For as long and as well as they knew each other, they weren’t particularly close. He actually thought he might have spent more time in Sara’s room than Mick’s.

Predicting the future, he thought, then pushed the idea out of his mind, realizing as he did that he wasn’t sure which Sara he’d been thinking of.

He rounded a corner and nearly collided with someone. He took a step back and saw familiar light brown hair — the same color as Avery’s — messy in a way that seemed like it was on purpose. He was slightly more built than on Earth-63, but he was dressed the same: t-shirt and loose-fitting jeans.

“Hey,” he said, holding out a hand, “Nate Heywood. You must be Captain Cold. Ray talks about you all the time.”

Leonard stood still, not really sure how to react. He had never considered the potential overlaps between the two Earths he knew, overlaps he couldn’t foresee.

Nate Heywood hadn’t been on the team when Leonard was last a part of it, yet here he was. He wondered what else was different.

Had anybody else joined the team? He knew Rip was gone, although he didn’t know why — maybe after the Oculus they defeated Savage and saved Miranda and Jonas. Maybe he was with his family.

Either way, Sara was captain of the Waverider now, a fact he hadn’t gotten to process yet.

What about at home? Is Lisa dating Cisco on this Earth? Is she working on the Flash’s team? What about Malcolm Merlyn? As memories of Earth-1 returned to him, he remembered hearing about earthquakes in a district in Star City, attributed to Malcolm Merlyn. What was he doing now? Still in jail, hopefully.

“Hey,” Nate said, slowing lowering his hand, “You alright?”

“Peachy,” he replied, brushing past him towards Mick’s room.

It was a disaster zone.

Mick had always been the messiest person Leonard had ever known. This wasn’t particularly out of the norm when they were teenagers, but apparently he’d never grown out of it. At least something was consistent between the two Earths.

Mick was sitting on the edge of the bed, tinkering with the heat gun. He looked up.

“Mick,” he said, leaning against the doorframe.

“Heard you were back from the dead,” he replied, glancing up at him before looking back to his gun.

“Seems like it.”

“Haircut told me you were on a different Earth.”

“Seems like it.”

“He said you married Sara on that Earth,” Mick eventually said, “Nice job.”

“Thanks.”

Mick didn’t respond immediately, long enough for Leonard to think he should say more. He felt a strange need to apologize to him, but he wasn’t sure why.

“After you died, I told Sara that I wish I’d ‘a done more to push you together.”

“You knew?”

“ ‘course I know. The only ones on this tin can who didn’t know were you and Blondie. Glad to hear it worked out on one Earth, though.”

Leonard didn’t respond.

“Did you know me on this other Earth?” Mick asked.

“I did,” he replied, “We weren’t as close though, not in the last five or six years — remember Freeport Warehouse.”

“Yeah,” Mick said with one short laugh, “Almost didn’t get outta that one.”

“Well, we didn’t. Got three years each — except yours turned into seven because you kept pissing off the guards. After that we didn’t really work together much anymore.”

“Did you invite me to the wedding?”

“I did.”

“Did I come?”

“Yeah. You did.”

Neither spoke for a moment, Mick focusing on the heat gun, Leonard’s eyes roaming around the room that was becoming more familiar with each passing minute.

“You shouldn’t ‘a done it,” Mick said.

“Done what?”

“Knocked me out. Traded places with me.”

“Doesn’t seem like it really mattered in the end.” Leonard replied.

“Still. Shouldn’t ‘a done it. Not for me. Didn’t deserve it.”

Leonard furrowed his eyebrows. Apparently he wasn’t the only rogue who had changed during their time on the Waverider.

“Stein, Jax, and the boy scout are working on a way to get to your other Earth,” Mick continued, seeming unbothered by not getting a response to his previous statement. “You gonna go?”

Leonard didn’t answer immediately, even thought he knew what he was going to say. Mick’s question had made him realize that he was going to need to make a decision eventually, and the longer he stayed here, the harder that became.

“I really don’t know.”

—

Leonard left Mick’s room only a couple minutes later. Mick was a man of few words, and Leonard could sense when the conversation would go no further.

He headed back towards his room the way he came. He was nearing the corridor leading to the bridge when a familiar figure walked out of it and turned his way.

Leonard was standing face to face with Sara Lance. Sara’s expression was one he’d never seen before — not on this version nor her Earth-63 counterpart — holding both anger and sadness. He felt his lips involuntarily part, his eyes softening.

Leonard saw something change on Sara’s face, and before he knew what was happening, she surged towards him and they were kissing.

Kissing this Earth’s Sara was not like kissing the Sara on Earth-63. That Sara was gentler, not hardened by years on a remote island inhabited by training assassins. This Sara’s strength was apparent in her touch, one hand on his cheek, the other on the back of his neck.

Everything came flooding back to him, the smirks exchanged over the holo table during team meetings, fighting back to back against Savage’s army — not even fighting with Mick was as effortless. Everything about this Sara he’d ever thought and felt came back.

He pulled away. He met her eyes, seeing the sadness had returned.

“Sara—”

She shook her head, opening her mouth to speak and closing it again before she brushed past him.

Leonard watched her go for a moment before he sighed and continued towards his room.

—

He didn’t leave his quarters at all after his interaction with Sara. A couple hours later, Ray poked his head into the room.

“Hey,” he said, “So I’ve been talking to Gideon and we think we figured out a way to get you back to Earth-63— if you wanted.”

Leonard didn’t say anything so he continued.

“And we think we figured out a way to sort of reset the timeline there, so if you wanted to stay here, it’ll be like nothing ever happened. Nobody gets hurt. I could explain how it all works if you wanted—”

“No thanks.”

“Yeah, sorta figured,” he shrugged, “Anyway, I know it’s a tough decision so take your time.”

He backed out of the room and the metal doors slid closed.

A few minutes later, he heard another voice in the doorway.

“Hey.”

Leonard turned his head to see Sara in the spot Ray had just left.

“I’m sorry about—” she hesitated, “I’m sorry about before. I…your expression when…I’m just sorry. Ray told me about Earth-63, how you’re married to…to that version of me, and about your daughter.”

He nodded slowly.

“What’s her name?” Sara asked, moving farther into the room.

“Avery Felicity Lance,” he replied, unable to conceal the small smile that appeared on his face.

“Felicity?”

“Yeah, I guess you’re closer with her on my — that — Earth than here.”

“The timelines are different?”

He nodded.

“How?” she asked, “How did I end up — not what I am today.”

“You didn’t go on the boat.”

Sara went still. Leonard knew she had always wondered who she would be had she not gone on the Queen’s Gambit with Oliver. Maybe this was it. Maybe she would finish college, become a cop, have a daughter.

She wouldn’t meet him though. He knew that much. His past on Earth-63 was bad, but his past here was much, much worse. Putting aside other discrepancies that would stand between them meeting (for one, he was pretty sure he’d never even seen the apartment building he and his sister had lived in on Earth-63, the one where he and Sara had met), there was no possibility Sara would give him the time of day. None.

“What else?” she asked.

“Your parents are still divorced and your mom still lives in Central City, but your dad is married to Felicity’s mother.”

“Really?” Sara interjected, “I don’t think they even know each other here.”

“Tommy’s alive,” he continued. She nodded, “He’s married to your sister.”

He saw her eyes widen slightly, her lips parting.

“What?”

“My sister died,” she told him, “sometime during the first few months of the mission. I found out after you…after the Oculus.”

“I’m sorry.”

Sara nodded, then shook her head, straightening.

“What else?” she asked, “So I didn’t go on the boat. What’d I end up doing?”

“You’re a cop,” he replied.

“Really?”

He nodded, “Actually, a homicide detective. you led the case to catch Captain Cold.”

“Is that how we met?” she asked, laughing.

“No,” he smirked.

“Why do I feel like that’s a long story,” she replied. He nodded, the smirk becoming a smile before he could stop it. “What about my — her — daughter? How old is she?”

“Four,” he replied, “Turns five in March.”

“Can I see her?”

Leonard pulled his phone out of his back pocket and opened a folder of photos he had of Avery. He knew there were a few photos of Sara — Earth-63 Sara — in there as well.

He watched as Sara looked at the pictures.

“She’s cute,” she told him, smiling as she swiped through the blurry selfies Avery had taken in the few seconds before Leonard noticed, “Baby pictures?”

Sara tipped the phone towards him so he could see a photo of Avery when she was a little over a year old, standing on chunky little legs in Dinah Lance’s kitchen. Her light brown curls were shorter, but just as wild.

He nodded.

“Huh,” she said, “I just never saw you as the kind of dad who had baby pictures on his phone.”

He didn’t. Well, not really. He had pictures of Avery now, mostly ones she’d taken herself. The only baby pictures he had of her were sent by Sara — Avery had needed them for a homework assignment.

“Do you know who her…” Sara hesitated, “biological dad is?”

“Yeah,” he replied. He sensed her next question and shook his head, “Doesn’t matter who.”

Sara nodded. A moment later, her face clouded over.

“Oh God, tell me it’s not Oliver.”

“It’s not Oliver,” he chuckled.

Sara stilled. Leonard remembered that the version of him Sara remembered rarely ever laughed or smiled (besides out of sarcasm, anyway).

He watched her sigh.

“You’re not staying,” she said. It wasn’t a question. She already knew the answer.

“No.”

“Because of them.”

“I love them,” he said, “more than I thought I ever could.”

She exhaled.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

“No, I get it,” she shook her head. She waited a beat and then continued, “You should know — and I’m not saying this to convince you to stay, I swear — it really sucks not having you on the Waverider. It does. There’s too many Ray’s on board now. I wish you were here to balance things out.”

He chuckled.

“You still have Mick,” he replied.

“Mick’s not as good at pushing buttons as you were,” she shook her head, smiling slightly, “Team hasn’t been the same without you.”

He didn’t respond. There wasn’t anything he could say.

Sara spoke again.

“I wish I hadn’t left.”

“The Oculus?”

“No — well, yes — but I mean my room. When you came to talk to me.”

“Oh.”

“I always wondered…” she trailed off momentarily, “if I hadn’t left and we had kept talking and…stuff, would you still have taken Mick’s place.”

Leonard didn’t answer immediately. His conversation with Sara then had gone exactly how he thought it would, but if it hadn’t, if it had gone differently, maybe he would have made a different choice.

“I don’t know,” he replied honestly, “But you should know I meant what I said about thinking about you. I think that’s why I did what I did on the bridge, pulling the cold gun on you.”

“You know, I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to justify that kind of thing,” Sara said, her lips turning up in a smirk.

“I’m not,” he replied, “I was a jerk —”

“Guilty,” Sara cut in, still smirking, and Leonard felt a pang in his chest.

“I was a jerk,” he repeated, “but I think I was trying to convince myself that I didn’t care as much as I did.”

“And did it work.”

“No.”

“Captain,” Gideon’s voice rang out across the room, “Ray would like you to know that the tech to send Mr. Snart back to Earth-63 is ready.”

“Okay,” Sara replied. She met Leonard’s eyes, “Ready?”

“Yeah.”

—

“You’re sure this is what you want?” Ray asked when he and Sara were on the bridge. Leonard said nothing but raised an eyebrow at him, “Okay, well, you should know Gideon wants to erase your memories — you know, of this Earth.”

“Why?”

“After we bring you to Earth-63, we can’t come back, and there’s no way for you to get in contact with us. That’s not gonna be a problem if you don’t remember any of us and all of this. Besides, I can’t imagine wanting to have memories of two lives in a world where only one happened.”

“Fine.”

“Alright, so we figured out a way to sort of…beam you into Earth-63 in the exact place you left, and we’ll erase your memory then.”

“Okay.”

“Okay,” Ray repeated. He took on a look that conveyed a taxing internal debate before stepping forward and hugging Leonard.

“That was unnecessary,” he grumbled when Ray relinquished him.

Mick then moved forwards.

“I’m glad you’re not dead,” he told him as Leonard shook his hand.

“Me too. Tell my sister what happened.”

“ ‘Course.”

Jax and Stein both shook Leonard’s hand and then stepped back.

Sara started moving towards him, arms crossed in front of her.

“We’re gonna miss you around here,” she said. She stopped when she was just in front of him and turned to Ray. “He’s not gonna remember anything?”

“Not anything, just nothing from this Earth. Gideon said tha—”

“Perfect,” Sara breathed, grabbing Leonard’s face and capturing his lips with hers.Leonard gave into the kiss that time, snaking his arms around her waist.

“What the hell?” he heard a voice that sounded suspiciously like Nate whisper.

Sara’s hands trailed from his face to around his neck as she deepened the kiss. Leonard remembered the last time he had kissed Sara, when they were at the Oculus. He remembered when she pulled away, their eyes meeting. He remembered trying to memorize every inch of her in the seconds before she left.

Sara pulled away, untwining her arms from around his shoulders. Leonard didn’t move his hands from her waist. He met her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice low. She shook her head.

“Don’t,” she replied just as softly, “It’s okay.”

Finally, he let his arms drop and Sara stepped away from him.

“Ready?” Ray asked again.

“Yeah,” Leonard nodded.

Ray lifted his arm. In his hand was a small white gun with a wide, box-shaped barrel that looked not unlike the one Rip Hunter had used on him when he was first pulling together the team.

Leonard’s eyes flicked to Sara. Her expression was the same as when they were at the Oculus.

She gave him a small, almost imperceptible nod. He heard the click of the trigger, and as he turned back to Ray, a flash of white light completely consumed his vision.

—

“Hey,” Sara said, her hand moving to his arm. He met her eyes, seeing concern written on her face, “You okay? It looked like we lost you for a second.”

Leonard processed again where he was, saw the twinkling lights hung around them, illuminated by the steadily setting sun, heard the last few notes of Al Green’s Let’s Stay Together beginning to fade. He looked back to Sara, saw her in her wedding dress, felt the weight of her hand on his arm, and smiled.

“Just realizing how lucky I am,” he said.

“Oh really?” Sara asked, a smirk on her lips and eyebrows raised, “And why is that?”

“I dunno,” he replied, his arms moving to around her waist, “maybe because you’re beautiful and smart and strong.”

“I’m also your wife,” Sara replied, the smirk turning into a smile as she looped her arms around his neck.

“You’re proving my argument,” he murmured against her lips before Sara kissed him.

—

“Would you like me to land, Captain,” Gideon asked.

Sara didn’t answer immediately, looking out the jumpship window at the couple on the dance floor.

“Uh…no, Gideon,” she replied, “We’re leaving in a second.”

She continued looking at the scene below her. She’d never seen a more beautiful wedding before, with the lights and lanterns hanging from the rustic wooden frame lighting up the shiny black and white dance floor and the tables and chairs filled with people. She didn’t consider herself to be a wedding person — she hadn’t really even thought about the possibility of having one since before the Gambit. Maybe this version of her was.

She saw her father dancing with a blonde woman she had to assume was Felicity’s mother — Leonard really wasn’t kidding about that, she supposed.

Her eyes landed on Laurel then, and she felt tears pricking her eyes. She was dancing with Tommy a couple yards away from Leonard and this Earth’s Sara. She was laughing at something Tommy had said as they swayed back and forth to the music.

“Gideon, is there any way I can hear what’s going on down there — without them noticing, obviously.”

There was a click and then the first chorus of The Way You Look Tonight started playing  in the jumpship.

“Daddy!” Sara heard a high voice call. She watched a little girl run across the dance floor and jump into Leonard’s arms.

Even from a distance, Avery Lance looked just like her picture, with wild brown curls and shining eyes.

“Mama,” Avery said, “watch this!”

She squirmed out of Leonard’s arms and took his hand, twirling underneath it.

Sara watched her Earth-63 counterpart smile.

“Wow, Avie,” she said heard her say, “That’s so cool.”

Sara sat down in the pilot’s chair.

He made the right choice, she decided as she watched Leonard with this Earth’s Sara, Avery hanging onto his arm, chattering indistinguishably about something in the little girl manner she’d never been able to understand. He’d never looked that happy before, a genuine smile on his face as he looked to his wife.

“Gideon,” Sara said, “I’m ready to go.”

“Aww,” Ray said, looking far too disappointed.

“I’ll go, and I’ll take…” she paused, looking over the team, “…Mick with me.”

She heard a scoff off to the side, just out of her view. She turned to see Leonard leaning against the wall.

“You object?” Sara asked him, eyebrows raised.

“I just think bringing Mick to a field of highly flammable trees might not be a winning idea,” he commented.

“So what do you suggest?” she asked, her expression unchanged.

“Fine, whatever, I’ll go,” he said, straightening and taking a few steps towards her.

“Great,” she said stoically, ignoring the quickening pace of her heart.

—

The following day, Leonard and Sara were dropped off in a small Connecticut town with a beat up Sedan and directions to a Christmas tree farm called Silverman’s.

“Is this crazy?” Sara asked, her eyes on the road ahead. Before Leonard could respond, she continued, “Am I crazy for letting them do this?”

“I think it’s a step in the right direction to not let them get the tree,” he replied. Sara tipped her head to the side in agreement.

“I don’t think I’ve celebrated the holidays in, like, ten years,” she said, “Not since I first got on the Gambit — whoops.”

Sara jerked the wheel to the side, narrowly avoiding clipping a mailbox with the side of the car.

Leonard didn’t respond immediately. The last time Sara had talked to him about her past was before the Oculus, which he knew was longer for her than it was for him.

“Yeah,” he said, “Been a while for me too. Never really got a chance to feel sentimental about it. Tried to do what I could for Lisa, but when she stopped caring I didn’t bother anymore.” Then he added, “Are you aware you’re driving about twenty miles over the speed limit.”

“It’s fine. This is Connecticut. Everyone drives like a moron in Connecticut,” she shrugged, although Leonard noticed the car slowing down to a more reasonable speed. He heard her sigh.

“What?”

“I don’t know why I care so much about having Christmas on the Waverider,” Sara shook her head, “It’s not like Ray and Nate are gonna hurt anyone just by putting up some decorations on the ship.”

“I guess you should be grateful that’s all they want,” he replied. Sara gave him a confused look, “What?”

“That’s very diplomatic of you,” she said with raised eyebrows.

“Says the captain of a timeship.”

Sara rolled her eyes, then sighed.

“You’re right. What’s the worst that could happen?”

They found out soon how bad it could get.

—

Sara woke up days later. She looked around, not seeing the soft blue light of the med bay she expected.

“Where am I?” she asked when she saw a figure moving in the periphery of her vision.

“Hey, you’re awake!” Ray exclaimed. He went for the door to call for a nurse.

“Where am I?” she asked again. Zari stood from a chair in a corner Sara hadn’t noticed before.

“You’re at the hospital. Someone called 911 before we could get to you,” she explained, “and the ambulance was there not too much later. We didn’t have a window to get you out.”

“Also, they didn’t let us see you if we weren’t family,” Nate added, “so if anyone asks, you’re married to Snart, you and I are siblings, Amaya’s my wife, Mick is Snart’s brother and Zari is Mick’s adopted daughter.”

“Okay,” Sara replied, not finding the energy to be anything but compliant. She went to push herself into a seated position and winced when a sharp pain shot through her chest and abdomen.

“Careful,” Zari said, finding the remote for the hospital bed and pressing down on a button. The hospital bed slowly rose to a more upright position.

“What happened?” Sara asked when she was sitting more comfortably.

“You remember the accident?” Amaya asked, stepping up to the bed.

“I remember…” she hesitated, “driving and then a crash and flashing lights and that’s it. Then I woke up.”

“You were hit by a drunk driver running a red,” Amaya told her.

“T-boned,” Nate said, nodding appreciatively, “Classic.”

“Well said,” Zari shook her head at him, stepping in front of Nate to get closer to Sara’s bed, “He hit your side of the car so you got the worst of it.”

Sara felt herself tensing as a new wave of panic settled in her chest.

“Where’s Snart?” she asked, looking around the room for a figure she might have missed.

“He’s fine,” Amaya told her, “A little beat up, but fine.”

“He and Mick are at a police station giving a statement,” Zari added, “Not their choice, but the hospital recommended it and we’re trying to seem at least somewhat normal until we can get you out of here.”

“And when do you think that will be?” Sara asked.

“We’re not sure,” Amaya replied, “You just woke up from surgery — two surgeries, actually.”

“Surgeries?” she asked, “For what?”

A nurse walked briskly into the room, Ray following close behind her.

“The EMT’s saw you had a collapsed lung in the ambulance,” she answered, “and while that was being fixed, the surgeons saw some internal bleeding in the abdominal region.”

“Oh.”

The nurse bustled around Sara for a few minutes, making occasional notes on a purple clipboard.

“How’s the pain?” she asked a minute later.

“Not too bad,” Sara replied.

“You’re a trooper,” she said, impressed, “Most people in your position are asking for all the morphine we’ve got. You’re getting some light pain medication through the IV, but if it starts to get bad, press this button,” she held up a gray remote with a big green light in the center, “and you’ll get a dose of something stronger.”

Sara nodded, and a moment later the nurse was gone. The room was silent for a while.

“When are they supposed to get back?” Sara asked after a few minutes.

“Rory and Snart?” Amaya asked. Sara nodded, “Not sure. They only left a half hour ago.”

“You’re sure he’s okay?”

“He’s fine,” Ray said, looking at Sara seriously, “Promise.”

Sara, feeling partially satisfied with the answer she received, began to realize how tired she felt. She let her eyes droop closed.

“We’ll let you rest,” Amaya said, heading towards the door.

Sara nodded, managing a small smile. The others followed Amaya, and Sara was asleep before the door had closed.

—

“She seems okay,” Zari said when they were back in the waiting room.

“Yeah,” Amaya nodded.

“Did any of you notice a weird vibe when she mentioned Cold?” Nate asked. Amaya and Zari shrugged and shook their heads. Ray looked determinately in the other direction.

“Ray saw,” Zari commented drily.

“Hey!”

“You saw?” Nate exclaimed.

“Yeah,” Ray admitted, “Look, Snart and Sara have had this weird bond ever since the first mission. She took all the Oculus stuff and his death really hard, but with her becoming Captain, and also probably not wanting to step on Mick’s toes, because obviously he’s known him for longer, she didn’t get to deal with it like she should have. Maybe the car crash just brought up old memories.”

“Shit,” Nate said slowly.

“Bond,” Zari repeated, “You mean romantic?”

“Not sure,” Ray replied, “They did start to seem like a married couple by the end, but as far as I’m aware, nothing ever happened.”

They were quiet for a moment.

“Their kids would be gorgeous,” Zari said to no one in particular.

—

About an hour later, Mick and Leonard walked into the waiting room.

“Did she wake up?” Leonard asked when he saw the rest of the team.

“Yeah,” Ray nodded, “She’s sleeping now, but she was up for a few minutes.

“She’s —”

“She’s okay,” Ray cut him off, looking at him with the same serious expression he’d worn when Sara had asked the same question of Leonard.

“She asked about you,” Zari told him.

“She did?”

“You should go see her,” she said, “She’ll probably wake up again soon.”

She told him the room number and watched as he headed down the hall.

The hallway was decorated for the holidays. Stickers of wreaths, candy canes, and trees were pressed against the doors, decorating the light wood. Someone had drawn snowflakes and snowmen on the windows with window markers. It all felt too festive for a hospital.

When Leonard arrived at the Sara’s room, the door was propped open. A nurse was inside, making notes on a clipboard. She turned when he entered the room.

“Ah, you must be the husband,” she said.

Leonard blinked, unable find a reason for what she had just said. He then remembered Nate saying something earlier about making up familial connections so they could get into the hospital.

“Uh, yeah,” he finally responded.

“I told her this while she was awake, but she’s a real trooper,” she said.

“She was awake?” he asked, momentarily forgetting Zari had answered the same question only minutes ago.

“Yes,” the nurse — Sandy, a name-tag read — replied, “Just the anesthesia wearing off. She’s been through a lot. She’ll probably sleep on and off for the next day or so. You don’t need to let me know next time she wakes up. I’ll be back in a couple hours to check her vitals again.”

Leonard nodded, and then the nurse was gone and he was alone with Sara.

Sara was asleep, her head tipped to one side and the hand attached to a heart monitor resting on top of a blue blanket.

Leonard pulled a chair over to the bed and sat. He looked at Sara. She was very pale, making the cuts above her eye and on her cheek even more prominent. Sometime between the ambulance and now, someone had removed all the makeup from her face. Leonard didn’t realize Sara wore makeup until its absence, and he had never seen her more beautiful than now.

He thought about the car accident.

They found a tree they both deemed acceptable in about a half hour (another reason for not sending Ray and Nate - it was possible they would have been gone for hours trying to find the perfect Christmas tree). In another fifteen minutes, the tree was fixed to the top of the car and they were heading back to the Waverider.

Leonard had insisted on driving.

"Why does it matter who drives?" Sara had asked as Leonard pulled out of the parking lot.

"You drove here," he replied, "It's only fair."

Sara raised her eyebrows, so he continued.

"Plus if you drove like you did on the way here, we might lose the tree."

“Aw did my driving scare you,” Sara smirked.

“Yes,” he nodded seriously, “You drive like Lisa did just after she got her license.”

“Hey, it's not my fault I haven't really driven a car since I was a teenager."

"I'll bring it up with Oliver next time I see him."

And then the world turned upside down.

Leonard hadn’t seen the pickup truck — not that it would have mattered if he did.

He heard a smashing sound and felt himself jolted to the side. Horns started blaring, muted somewhat by a ringing in his ears. He took a moment to assess himself. He felt a dull pain on the side of his head but otherwise he was okay.

He hesitated before looking at Sara. He could already hear her voice in his head.

Maybe you should have let me drive, and she would have that half-smirk on her face, the same one she wore any time something bad happened to her.

Or maybe she’d say something about karma for letting Ray and Nate do this whole Christmas thing.

He turned to look at her and then his heart dropped into his stomach.

Sara was slumped against the passenger-side door. Dark blood trickled out of a cut above her eye. Shattered glass was scattered around her, some small fragments caught in her hair glittering like fresh snow. She was motionless and Leonard was completely frozen.

Sometime later — probably only a minute or two but in the moment, Leonard had no idea — Sara’s door opened and a uniformed man was pulling her out of the car.

Then he became aware of sirens and a dozen people speaking over each other and a cacophony of other noise he couldn’t identify.

“Len.”

Leonard was pulled back to the hospital room by the sound of Sara’s voice. He met her eyes, feeling as he did a heaviness settle in his heart.

Neither said anything for a while.

After a minute, Leonard spoke.

“I’m sor—”

Sara stopped him when she dropped her hand to rest on his, shaking her head.

“You don’t have to,” she said, her voice rough, “It’s okay."

“It’s not okay,” he said, “This wouldn’t have happened if—”

“This wouldn’t have happened if some idiot didn’t get hammered in the middle of the day and then tried to drive,” she interrupted him again, “This isn’t your fault.”

Leonard turned his head away, not able to look at her anymore, not when her eyes were full of such sincerity.

“Hey,” Sara said, her voice soft. He felt her hand brush against the side of his face, the cool touch of her fingers coming to rest on his neck and jawline, “You okay?”

She turned his head slightly to better see the cut on the side of his head that had been stitched up the day earlier.

Leonard found himself without words.

“What?” Sara asked, noticing the change in his expression.

He looked to her again, leaning slightly into her hand as he met her eyes.

“How do you do that?” he asked.

“Do what?”

“Be so…” he paused, “…you. All the time.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re the one who almost died and you’re asking me if I’m okay.”

“I’ve seen worse,” she told him with a small smile.

“I haven’t,” he replied, “Not with you.”

He saw a twinge of something in Sara’s eyes but he wasn’t really sure what it was.

“I promise,” she told him again, “I’m okay.”

He didn’t say anything, and Sara could see him inwardly grappling with something. She wasn’t surprised. Their conversation had long since drifted into feelings-territory, and Sara knew that Leonard’s eloquence and charm rarely made it there with him.

“I should go,” he finally said, starting to lift himself out of the chair, “I’ll let you—”

Sara caught his wrist and pulled him back. With her other hand, she pushed herself up towards him, her lips capturing his. Sara felt him freeze momentarily, but then the hand not in Sara’s grip traveled to the back of her head. Sara felt herself being lowered down to the bed as Leonard deepened the kiss.

A moment later, he felt Sara smile.

“What?” he murmured.

“I think I might enjoy the holidays this year.”

“He’s right, you do,” Avery nodded vigorously.

“Thanks, Avie,” Sara chuckled.

“How’re the bride and groom doing?”

Sara looked over her shoulder to see Felicity standing behind her chair.

“Good,” she smiled as Leonard nodded.

“You’re eating?” she asked, “Because at my wedding I was so preoccupied with things I barely ate anything at all.”

“You had a whole plate of those stuffed clam things by yourself,” Sara reminded her.

“I know.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be up there right now?” Sara asked.

Barry had just given his best man toast, which greatly resembled what he had said to Leonard earlier that day (although he’d left the stuff about his criminal past out, which Leonard couldn’t help but be grateful for).

“I’m letting everyone recover,” Felicity said before taking a sip from her champagne glass, “ ‘Kay, I’m gonna go now.”

They watched as Felicity made her way to the middle of the dance floor. She tapped the top of the microphone Caitlin handed to her and all heads turned towards her.

“So I think it’s my turn now,” Felicity said, “Not that I’ve ever needed permission to talk about how much I love Sara.”

She paused for a moment.

“I have known Sara for a long time,” she began, “since even before Avery was born, although I bet Sara probably doesn’t even remember what that’s like.”

“I don’t,” Sara chuckled as everyone laughed.

“Only about a month ago, Sara was giving her maid of honor toast at mywedding, and what she said was perfect and amazing just like everything she does. She told me after that she made it up on the fly because, as she said, when you’re in the presence of people who are really, trulyin love, talking about it is effortless. You can feel it just being in the room with them. Now, my speech is not on the fly because, as many of you now, I am not the most eloquent person, but being here, I can feel that real, true love Sara was talking about. They make each other happy. I’ve known Sara for a long time, and this is the happiest I’ve ever seen her. Thank you, Leonard, for being such a positive force in her life. I wish you both a lifetime of love and happiness.”

She nodded and then handed the microphone back to Caitlin.

Sara stood to hug her friend.

“I mean it,” Felicity said into her hair.

“I love you so much,” Sara said.

“I love you too.”

The next half hour was spent sitting around their tables, eating dinner and talking together as seventies and eighties music floated around them.

“Daddy!” Avery gasped as a new song began to play, “It’s the song!”

A few weeks earlier, when Leonard was making dinner and Avery was sitting at the counter coloring on pink construction paper, “Let’s Stay Together” started playing on the radio.

“This is one of my favorite songs,” he had commented as he poured a box of pasta into a pot of boiling water.

Avery looked up from her drawing.

“Really?” she asked. He nodded.

“My mom used to play it a lot when I was around your age.”

“Is it from a Disney movie?” she had asked.

“No,” he chuckled, “It’s Al Green.”

Thirty minutes later, Sara returned from work to hear “Let’s Stay Together” being played for the eighteenth time, Avery dancing in circles around the living room, singing along with the chorus as Leonard set the table for dinner.

“Come dance with me!” Avery said. She hopped out of Leonard’s lap and tugged on his hand, “Daddy, please!”

Sara smiled as Leonard stood up, letting Avery pull him towards the dance floor.

A moment later, Laurel sat down in his empty chair.

“Hey,” she said.

“Hi.”

“This is all so beautiful,” she said, looking around them, “You really didn’t hire a wedding planner?”

“Nope,” Sara shook her head, “Just a few friends who really didn’t want us wasting an opportunity to throw a huge-ass party.”

Laurel laughed. Sara looked back to the dance floor where Avery was holding Leonard’s hand above her head, twirling around underneath it.

“He seems like a great dad,” Laurel said.

“He is,” Sara nodded, smiling.

“Let’s go dance,” she said, taking her sister’s hand and pulling her to her feet. Sara followed her to the dance floor, “Remember when I had my first dance in middle school, and that guy asked me to go with him and I was nervous because I’d never slow-danced before—”

“— and you made me practice with you,” Sara finished.

“How old even were you then?”

“Probably like eight,” she laughed.

They watched Avery twirled in circles, her skirt fluttering around her, until she bumped into her mother’s legs.

“Come dance with me, Avie,” Sara said, lifting her up

As Leonard watched Sara dance with Avery, Laurel walked over to him.

“Hey, you having fun?”

“This isn’t usually my scene,” he said, “but yes, I actually am.”

“Good,” she nodded, “Look, I apologized to Sara, but I think I owe you one too. I’m really sorry I sort of accidentally directed Nate towards you guys. I know he gave you all a hard time.”

“It’s okay,” he nodded, “It’s in the process of,” he paused, “resolving itself.”

Laurel chuckled.

“What?”

“No, it’s just that Sara said the same thing.”

“She did?”

“Um-hmm,” she nodded, “You guys are really great together.

“Avery’s dancing with someone and it isn’t me?” they heard someone explain

They both looked over in time to see Avery run over and jump into Felicity arms, letting her swing her around in circles.

Leonard felt someone grab his hand.

“You wanna dance, Leonard?” Sara asked, a smirk on her lips. Leonard didn’t answer, just wrapped his arms around her waist as Sara draped her arms around his neck.

A half-hour later, Leonard found himself standing on the edge of the dance floor, watching Sara dance with her father and Avery shriek with laughter as Oliver threw her into the air, catching her on the way down.

“Snart.”

Leonard turned towards the gruff voice and saw that it belonged to Mick Rory.

“Mick,” he said, “You made it.”

“I thought you were already married.”

“What?”

“All those times we talked about your wife Sara,” Mick said.

“I don’t think I ever said she was my wife — no, I know I didn’t because up until about two hours ago, she wasn’t.”

“Oh. Well, congratulations either way.”

“Thanks.”

Neither said anything for a while. They stood, not facing each other, silently looking out onto the dance floor.

“I saw you dancing with your daughter — she is your daughter, right?”

“Yes, she is,” he replied, almost chuckling.

“Cute kid. She looks like you.”

Leonard didn’t know how to respond.

“You’re actually doing this?” Mick asked a moment later.

“Doing what?”

“Y’know, the carpools and runny noses and changing diapers.”

“Yeah,” he replied, not bothering to tell him Avery hadn’t worn diapers in years, “I am.”

After another moment, Mick said, “I think I’m gonna head out.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Not my crowd. Congratulations again.”

“Thanks.”

“See you, Snart.”

Leonard nodded. He watched Mick’s retreating form for a minute before sitting down at the table, content to simply observe the events of the party. Avery was now running around in the field with two of her friends from preschool. Sara was dancing with Felicity and Iris to an upbeat eighties song he knew he’d heard before, but couldn’t name.

He thought about what Lisa had said to him earlier about how a wife and a daughter weren’t something he’d thought were in the cards for him.

She wasn’t wrong.

When he was younger — not quite as young as Avery, more like early teenage years — he’d figured he would probably never end up getting married. His father had often told him,  usually as motivation for a job, that women loved a man who had money.

Earned their money, he’d always thought, not stolen it from banks and museums.

Sure, he’d dated some people, he supposed, both during his years at college and the few after, but after he’d acquired the cold gun and taken on the Captain Cold persona, he’d figured he shouldn’t even bother anymore. His morals may be grey at best, but he was certainly not going to lie to someone about who he was, and he didn’t think there was anybody on Earth who could possibly deal with who he was, never mind love him.

Yet here he was, at his wedding.

It was actually sort of amazing to him that Sara was able to look past all the things he’d done as Captain Cold. Looking back to the first few months they’d known each other, he’d done some things he wasn’t proud of. He’d threatened Avery, he remembered, in the warehouse by the docks. Sara had been pointing a gun at his chest, threatening to undo all the work he’d done to stop Merlyn and the Markov device. That didn’t excuse what he’d said.

If you want your daughter alive, you won’t turn me in.

It was an empty threat, but now, knowing how much he loved Avery, he couldn’t believe he’d said it.

And he couldn’t believe Sara hadn’t skewered him on the spot.

She’d always seen him for more than he thought he could be, even in his darkest moments.

“Daddy!” Avery said, running up to him, “The cupcakes are here!”

“They are?” he asked, “Are they as good as you remember?”

“Yeah!”

Several months ago, Cisco had asked Leonard and Sara to come down to S.T.A.R. Labs for cake testing. They, as part of their crusade to participate in the wedding planning as little as possible while also simultaneously driving Cisco crazy, had dropped Avery off at the lab and told him to go with whatever she picked. After an hour of trying cakes from every gourmet bakery in the area, Avery chose vanilla cupcakes with vanilla frosting. Cisco was irate.

“And,” Avery continued excitedly, “I told Cisco that I wanted the frosting to be pink, and guess what!”

“What?” Leonard asked.

“It’s pink!”

Judging by what was smeared on Avery’s cheeks, Cisco had gone with peach frosting rather than pink to better match his color scheme, but evidently Avery either didn’t notice or didn’t care.

“Nice choice, Avie,” Sara said, running a hand across Leonard’s shoulders before she sat next to him, setting a plate of cupcakes on the table, “These are freaking amazing.”

“Look, Mommy,” Avery said, “I put the flower in my hair.”

She turned her head to show the flower messily tucked behind her ear.

“You mean the flower made of frosting?”

“Uh-huh!”

“Great.”

They all looked over at the sound of someone tapping on the microphone.

“I hope you’re all is having a great time tonight,” Felicity said, “If you don’t mind, I’d like everyone to follow me.”

“What is happening?” Leonard asked Sara.

“I have no idea,” she replied, eyebrows furrowed as they got to their feet.

Felicity led everyone past the edge of the wooden structure and out onto the open field. They stopped just before the grass began to slope down into rolling hills.

“Okay,” Felicity said, “We all came together to celebrate Len and Sara and we can’t do that without mentioning Miss Avery. Avery is the strongest little girl I’ve ever seen and she’s been with her mom and dad every step of the way. I asked her if she wanted to say or do anything special today, and she said the daily bubble.”

“I’m gonna cry,” Sara said, shaking her head. Leonard wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her towards him.

“The daily bubble is a tradition that Avery and Sara started two years ago,” Felicity continued, “Can you tell us about the daily bubble, Avie?”

She lowered the microphone to Avery’s height.

“We make a really big bubble and then see how many seconds ’til it pops,” she said, “The most we ever got is eleven seconds but we wanna beat it.”

“They do it every day, rain or shine,” Felicity said, “and today we’re going to do the daily bubble with all of you.”

Avery took the pink plastic bubble wand Felicity handed her and ran over to her parents.

“Can you do it?” Avery asked, holding the wand out to her mother.

“Yeah,” Sara said, blinking back tears as she took the bubble wand.

Leonard picked Avery up, both watching Sara.

She sank the wand into the Tupperware container of soapy water, the same container she had used the day when Avery, two years old at the time, was near-tantrum with boredom and Sara had looked up how to make bubbles and clicked on the first website she saw. They went through a whole container of the stuff before Sara finally said, “that’s enough for today. We’ll see if we can make them longer tomorrow”.

She held the dripping wand in front of her for a moment before lifting it up and pulling it through the air until a beach ball sized bubble formed.

“One,” Avery instantly began.

“Two,” more people joined her.

“Three.”

Sara stood on her toes to kiss Leonard, Avery still in his arms.

“Four.” By now nearly everyone was counting.

“Five.”

The bubble ebbed and flowed as the wind pushed it across the sky.

“Six.”

“I love you, Sara,” Leonard murmured as he pulled away.

“Seven.”

“I love you too,” Sara said, her voice low enough only to be heard by him.

“Eight.”

Leonard thought about Felicity’s toast, how she echoed the things Lisa and Barry had said to him earlier. They all saw how happy they were, how happy he was.

“Nine.”

He held Avery in his arms, feeling Sara lean against his side as they all watched the bubble float over the hills and out towards the trees below. He thought about how lucky he was to be with these people who changed his heart.

“Ten.”

And he was.

“Eleven.”

Happy.