#xedgin

the dungeons and dragons movie is good bc some silly gay person WOULD make a bard named EDGING and go “noooo it’s pronounced ED-GIN” and their depressed gay little friend would go “this is my sorcerer. he’s cringefail and his name is simon”, and some fucking dm would go “this is my super mega paladin npc xenk with a sad backstory who fights good that i made to help you guys not die in the next encounter” and everyone at the table goes “ok but can i fuck him though”

hello new D&D movie fans who are writing fic! we’re glad you’re here. as a semi experienced D&D player I feel the need to make a PSA. to wit: while they may appear to be viable options, the Grease spell, and by extension the Oil of Slipperiness, generate enough grease to cover ten square feet or an entire humanoid. this is too much grease! unmanageable and unsexy quantities of grease. “can’t get anything done because we’re sliding around too much” quantities of grease. please opt for mundane lubricants. thank you for your time