I canāt be happy if i break my skull however i think i might need to. these thoughts must come out for my sake and yours. recently i have been too numb to write but i gladly accept any emotion if itās different. this could be my job. not writing but breaking skulls open for their ideas. people would come to me from miles away to watch my technique. my fingers are covered in the blood of smart men and women. my fingers are typing so slowly that i have to think about the meaning of every letter more so than i think of each word, but this doesnāt happen when breaking minds. this blood is so fresh, the bones so easy to move. why wasnāt this always my profession?
Business has slowed down recently but hasnāt stopped completely. Iām an old man looking at his previous accomplishments on the wall. thatās me in the newspaper over a line of corpses.Ā āfunnyman breaks skulls, remains in our heartsā. Iām eating newspaper clippings to relive the past. I donāt care if i wonāt remember them. Iām pretty sure it all happened. itās inside of me, right? Iām being interviewed by a newswoman who refuses to ask the important questions. She asks me when iāll get back into breaking skulls open. I look into my desk to find my most recent work and when i look up sheās gone. when i look back down my life work is gone as well. Why canāt i hold on to things? iām holding myself and wishing that i could remember everything. What exactly do i do again?Ā