#litwit

A psychological thriller list of links starring LitWit as a decades-long internet addict.

I wasn’t really in love with him when he asked me to be his girlfriend. The question seemed to pop out from nowhere. After all, we were just two friends having a drink after our summer class. We were both intoxicated and the beer seemed to cloud our college minds into incoherence. So, I said ‘yes’. I thought to myself: Sure. We’ll probably forget this when we’re sober. But then, as we made our way home, he took my hand in his and I remembered thinking that that moment will be etched forever into my memory.

Summer came and went. We were suddenly seniors on our last semester. Graduation was just a few months away from our grasp. I look back at our happy days and see myself sitting on the low steps of the university theatre, laughing at something he said, his hair soaked in sunshine, his eyes dancing with the same joy I felt. Those were the happier times: holding hands at the shopping center, endless conversations about music and our dreams, a kiss on the cheek when it was time to go home.

We had our share of fights, too – every couple has. Ours was like a game of hide and seek. Every time I try to confront him, he runs away, hibernates for days, and wouldn’t speak to me unless I apologize first. I’m not saying that I’m blameless. I was pretty emotional back then, too. Most of the time, I was the one starting the fight.

We broke up one day. I cannot remember the exact reason why. This particular fight happened before graduation, resulting to a decision to end things. Deep in my heart, I was hoping that, somehow, we’ll fix this and get back together again. There wasn’t a thing I wanted more back then. Graduation day finally came and I found myself politely exchanging pleasantries with him – too polite for people who were supposed to be still friends.

Days after, we were both invited to an out-of-town celebration for our block. Fast-forward to a couple of beers and I was really drunk. I found myself sitting beside him, slipping into an easy banter, and then slowly slipping out of the crowd. He kissed me; I started to cry. In between sobs, I told him how much I missed him and how much I wanted for us to be together again. To my horror, he shook his head and I watched as his face hardened. He started to walk away without a word, made his way back to where the others were happily celebrating – everyone oblivious to the fact that my world was tumbling over.

Ako si Celine. Sa totoong buhay, Klarita talaga ang pangalan ko. Masisisi niyo ba ako kung mas gusto kong palitan ang pangalan ko? Masyadong old-fashioned ang Klarita para sa akin. Isa pa, mas bagay ang Celine sa akin, dahil katulad ni Celine Dion, isa akong diva. Diva ng kagandahan.

Bata pa lang ako alam ko na na advantage sa mundong ito ang pagiging maganda. Mabuti na lang at pinanganak ako sa mayamang pamilya kaya hindi ko problema ang pera. Pero kagandahan? Medyo kinulang yata ako dun kaya naman pinagsikapan kong maging maganda. Oo, tama, pinagsikapan. Madali lang naman ‘yun lalo na’t mayaman kami. Mahirap naman kung sa dinami-dami ng aming salapi ay di ko man lang napaayos ang hitsura ko.

Inaamin ko retokada ako, sandamakmak na ang pinaayos ko sa katawan ko. Matangos na ilong, check. Lips na mala-Angelina Jolie, check. Noong 18th birthday ko, hiniling ko na regalo sa parents ko ay…. boob job! Tapos imbes na magarang cotillion, pool party ang selebrasyong ginawa namin. Nagsuot ako ng itsy bitsy red bikini para maipagmalaki ko sa mga kaibigan at kaklase ko ang mas pinalaki at mas pinaganda kong ‘hinaharap’. Bongga! Kinokompetensya ko sila Kim Chui at Jinkee Pacquiao sa padamihan ng retoke.

Ngayong 25 na ako, nag-umpisa na akong magpa-lipo at pinag-iisipan ko na ding magpa-botox. Sabi kasi nila, kapag nasa ganitong edad na nagsisimulang lumabas ang early signs of aging. Kaya naman maliban sa lipo at botox, araw araw akong nag-gygym. Syempre, umiinom din ako ng mga vitamins na nag-eenhance ng youth. Isang Fitrum sa umaga, tapos isang Myra-E sa gabi. Tignan ko lang kung umubra pa yang signs of aging na yan sa akin.

Nagbunga naman ang pagisisikap ko at nakapag-asawa ako ng isang mayamang business tycoon. Take note, hindi siya multi-millionaire kundi multi-billionaire. Success! At dahil marami siyang pera na pwedeng aksayahin, kinumbinsi ko siya na mag-hire ng mga de-kalibreng espesyalista, researchers, at scientists para hanapin ang ‘fountain of youth’. Kung di man nila mahanap, umimbento sila ng bago! Aba, ayoko yatang tumanda at maging wrinkled, tuyot, at pangit na artefact. Willing ako maging guinea pig nila. Keber kung radikal ang prosesa na pagdadaanan ko. Ika nga, ‘The end justifies the means’. Maging maganda lang ako at manatiling bata titiisin ko.