#limityourself

Sometimes people will take things for granted and that includes you. They will often get too comfortable especially if you spend too much time  together, they get over familiar and begin to predict your move. Whether wrong or right, the fact is people are naturally judgemental and no matter how much they likely that will be based on a judgement of what you represent.

Thats why it is very important to set healthy boundaries at the start of each new relationship you create to ensure you both get the most of your time together without causing each other pain. Boundaries are essential to healthy relationships and naturally a happier life. So sustaining and maintaining healthy boundaries is a skill one must learn, its not a skill we are all blessed with. It requires a level of self-awareness but for many of us setting boundaries is a relatively new concept.

                            “ To know and understand what your limits are”

1. Name your limits

To be able to set boundaries, you must first know your limits. You must analyse the things that make you happy and what makes you uncomfortable, these let you know what you are prepared to cope with and what you can’t take.

2. Get into your feelings

You have to get emotional, Like they say, get emosh! You have to really let your inner child tell you what you want and what you don't want to be happy. This is because your inner child is very petty and gets down to the fundamentals of your happiness. This is however, a private thing, you must not do this whilst addressing an issue.

3. Be direct

With some people you may never need to do this, some people are naturally understanding. When you share time or space with someone there is a level of understanding required for you to coexist in the same environment. Some things often left unspoken turn into issues down the line. You may think your exempt from this but you’re most likely not. Especially with this of a different culture/background or personality. Some people get easily offended, its important to be careful with your approach.

4. Allow yourself

You may feel hurt, guilty and in self-doubt when it comes to addressing certain issues. This is where you forgive yourself, you have to allow yourself. Allow yourself permission to be happy, you deserve to be happy. It's a form of self-respect

5. Look after yourself

Looking after your mental health should be your number one priority. Its very important to be in the right frame of mind in order for you to succeed at whatever it is you do, school, work, business, or just keeping a balance. Putting yourself first gives you the energy needed to find peace of mind and a positive outlook, this will intern make you a much better friend as you’ll be a much better friend & colleague

6. Seek counsel

Sometimes it may help to seek a more objective view of an issue before coming to a conclusion. You do not have to take anyones advice but two heads are always better than one. Learn from others mistakes. It's usually a matter of negotiation when setting boundaries. Nobody is perfect, however we have a responsibility in each relationship to be considerate to the other people involved. Everybody should be happy in a relationship. Perhaps inviting a mediator you both trust could help ease the tension.

7. Be assertive