a response to this post about matching your stories to spongebob quotes, listed in basically the order i found quotes
i spent too much time finding quotes. help me
Destroy Your Local Overlord:
“Well, it may be stupid, but it’s also dumb.”
“Good people don’t rip other people’s arms off!”
“So if we all could just pretend that Squidward was a fireman, or some guy in an ambulance, then I'm sure we could all pull together and discover what it truly means to be in a marching band.”
“He poisoned our water supply, burned our crops and delivered a plague unto our houses!” / “He did?” / “No, but are we just going to wait around until he does?!“
“You know, there's something I've been wanting to tell you from the day we first met: goodbye.”
Asthenopia:
“Well, it’s no secret that the best thing about a secret is secretly telling someone your secret, thereby adding another secret to their secret collection of secrets, secretly.”
“I knew a guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy’s cousin...”
“Isn’t this great Squidward? Just you & me together for hours and hours and hours! And then the sun’ll come up, and it’ll be tomorrow, and we’ll still be working!”
“I’ll fake my way through this just like I did in high school.”
“Think about the children!” / “That's a good idea! Use the children to get to places you couldn't normally reach!”
“Oh, nothing, SpongeBob, you just struck another pedestrian.”
“I'm telling you! You won't be able to handle the truth! There are some things in this world that weren't meant for mortal eyes!” / “Eye.”
“Code Red! FREE THINKER!”
RPG Hell:
“We’ve been smeckledorfed!”
“Surrender that ice cream cone or every waking moment for you will become a swirling torrent of pain and misery.”
“You asked for a couple of ice cubes in your drink... and I only put in one!”
Elliot Andeville is Going to Hell:
“There it is. The finest eating establishment ever established for eating. The Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty, with the Help Wanted sign on the front. I’ve waited years for this moment. I’m gonna go in there, march straight up to the manager, look at him straight in the eye, lay it on the line, and – I can’t do it!”
“You're my favorite supervillain. Can I get your autograph?”
Lilesque:
“How many times do we have to teach you this lesson, old man!?”
“Hey! Get back here and kill each other!”
“But we were performing a ritual to attract customers. And the only way the ritual can work is for us to get hurt. Real bad.”
Undecimber:
“Are you Squidward? ...That’s okay, take your time.”
“He’s just standing there... menacingly!”
VN:
“That’s it, mister! You just lost your brain privileges!”
“Did I, Patrick? Did I? Or did your criminal mind hypnotize me to steal it?”
“At least I'm safe inside my mind.”
SYOL:
“Don’t we look vicious and bloodthirsty?”
“You're just in time to enlist in my army! Join me, and we'll defeat the Pink Menace!”
“I say if you're not going to give me the respect I want as a hero, then maybe you'll give me respect as a villain. A villain who is...evil!”
Poly Hell:
“Isn’t this great, Squidward? It’s just the 3 of us. You, me, and this brick wall you built between us.”
“Squiiiidward-” “LIKES PATRICK MORE THAN SPONGEBOB!”
Decadence:
“I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.“
Over There:
“Gary, go away, can’t you see I’m trying to forget you?”
Dirt RPG:
"You used me... FOR LAND DEVELOPMENT!"
Waterfalls:
“We did it, Patrick! We saved the city!” [the city is destroyed and on fire]
Crossroad Fantasia:
“What a surprise. I invited them in, and I left them alone. Well, Squidward, what have we learned today?”
“If I can't have you as a friend, I'm going to make you a trophy! I even picked out this nice jar for you!”
Our Beloved Star:
“If you don't get out of here, then by the power invested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife!”
Bring Your Soul:
“There you are! I turn my back on you for one minute and you destroy half the city! You should be ashamed of yourself!”
Lethe Sillage:
“So, you were an alien all the time, and you didn't even tell me!” / “I didn't even know!”
5354:
“Holy guacamole! You can't eat my friends, you rats with wings!”
Iris Trip:
“So, do you deliver your own mail, or do you have your own mail person? But then who delivers his mail? Is there a never-ending chain of mailmen delivering mail to other mailmen?”
Frisson:
“It's not worth it! It's just not worth it! Goodbye, everyone, I'll remember you all in therapy!”
