#lilbea

Need you to know this was probably my favorite One Of These I got in this game

After much consideration I think I would have this one be like. My total autopsy (+ perhaps revival?) of the entire Bea/Lilith relationship featuring my most self-indulgent HCs

2. "I'm just getting comfortable."

33. "Can I ask you something?"

Natalie for you? A twofer. Lord knows I was glad of the extra sentences. (And I still went over 😭)

-

There's a sluggish shift against Lilith's back, the sudden weight of a leg slung across her hips that has her immediately jolting awake, tense.

"Calm down," Ava's voice is muzzy with sleep, whisper-soft in the quiet of the bedroom. "I'm just getting comfortable."

Lilith blinks, cranes her neck to look over her shoulder, finds Beatrice sheet-clad in the doorway with a mug of tea and an inscrutably placid expression.

Lilith has never stayed over before, certainty hadn't intended to drift off in their bed at all, and finds herself increasingly embarrassed by the whole thing, unsure of her place despite the coiled ivy grip Ava has around her midsection. But before she can decide how to extricate herself, Beatrice is crossing the threshold towards them, mattress dipping as she curls herself into Ava's back and stretches her arms across them both to press her palms to Lilith's skin, pinning her there with the lightest touch.

"Can I ask you something?" Beatrice asks, voice soft and low, mindful of Ava dozing between them.

Lilith clears her throat and swallows hard, bracing herself for what she's sure will come next: a polite dismissal, cordial but clear. That's quite enough for one night, don't you think?

But when she nods Beatrice hums a pleased note and only says, "Don't run off in the middle of the night this time. Ava's making breakfast."

“Don’t show them how weak you feel.”

It was something she told herself as she took in deep breaths to try and put everything back in its order. Something she whispered as she catalogued her feelings and stored them away for another day.

Lilith was good at that. Repressing.

And then, every couple of months, the files would get too full, the bins would get too heavy. The corners would start to crack. And Lilith would draw into herself.

She would avoid people. She didn’t want her negativity to affect them. She would retreat to the shadows more than usual. She was good at it. Nobody would know what was going on in her brain. She never called out for help. Because who could she rely on but herself?

Then she met Beatrice. Someone very much like her. She saw the woman’s mannerisms. Recognized some of them as things she did herself. And so, the two drew closer to each other, never many words spoken, but so much comfort between the two.

It was that time again. That time when the emotions became too much and Lilith could do nothing but lay there in bed. She clutched her pillow close to her chest. If the pillow could speak, it’d beg to be set free.

In and out. In and out. Her breaths were heavy. Uneven. The frustration within her growing every minute.

“Why am I like this... Why cant I just-“

A soft knocking at the door was heard and moments later the door was opened.

“Lilith?” Beatrice said quietly, only getting a rustle of blankets and a shift in the small bed as an answer.

Beatrice stood besides the bed, tilting her head at the silent question. All Lilith did was scoot over a little bit and Beatrice knew the answer.

She went back to the door and closed it shut, returning moments later after taking off her shoes.

Beatrice crawled into the little bed and scooted close to Lilith, taking the taller woman into her arms and holding her close to her chest just like she knew Lilith needed.

Lilith didn’t cry. But when she did, it was silent. Her body shook as the tears streamed down her face and onto the front of Beatrice’s habit. She wanted so furiously to push Beatrice away but didn’t allow herself to do it. They needed this. She needed this. Tonight she would be raw. Vulnerable. Open and exposed. And tomorrow? Everything would return to normal. At least as normal as things could be.

Bea’s heart breaks everytime it happened. But she took any moment of physical contact she could from lilith because she didn’t think lilith felt the same way Beatrice did about her and had long ago assumed Lilith asked because they shared a room together.

One night, the nightmares got really bad and Lilith clutched on to Beatrice tighter than she ever had before. Instead of leaving after a while and getting into her own bed like she usually did, Lilith stayed with Beatrice. She was too scared of how much worse the nightmares would be without beatrice holding her. And when they woke up the next morning, Lilith looked at Beatrice and she saw all the love and care in her eyes and oh.

They’re wrapped together, hair loose and flowing around them. And lilith made an impulsive desicion. She had to know. So she leaned up and kissed Beatrice softly on the lips. She was a little bit scared Beatrices would push her away and that would have have been that. no need to dwell on it. But when Bea pulls her in tighter and returns the soft kiss??? Lilith melted right into her arms all over again.

A moment of realization flashes across Lilith’s face. Oh no.

“I- I’m so sorry.“

Lilith knew why Beatrice was here. To save her mortal soul. But after what she did she felt intense guilt. She overstepped her boundaries. She didn’t feel guilty about her feelings towards Beatrice. Her mothers, although a painful memory, were a sure testament to not be ashamed of who you loved. But Beatrice? She had her own things to deal with and Lilith felt guilty.

“I know th-“

Beatrice put her finger over Lilith’s lips stopping the other woman from continuing her sentence. She took a deep breath as she moved her hand to Lilith’s cheek and stroked the loose hairs away from Lilith’s face.

“I’ve done so much thinking these past couple months, and so so much prayer. If loving you is a sin, then call me the the biggest sinner there is.”

Lilith’s eyes were wide. Beatrice said love. Lilith for so long had wanted to tell Beatrice she loved her but she had been beaten to the punch. She was a little upset about that one.

Beatrice was getting a little concerned. Was saying love overstepping? Was it too soon? Too much? Her mind started to spiral until Lilith’s hand ran up her arm.

Superpowers and Dreams by @lilshotgun • G • Beatrice/Lilith friendship