#liferealizations

On the way to work

Nothing much is new. As usual, im running late but I do not worry about the time at the moment. It took me an hour in the shower because I’ve been thinking a lot. Realized so many things and created role play scenarios in my head which sorta helped me think through stuff clearly.

I’ve listened to few podcast episodes a couple of days ago and reflected on what I’ve learned from them. And I know that to really learn is to understand it then apply it. Growing up, I missed to know how to accept people from being who they are because I lived through my beliefs on decency and conservativeness. I’ve always wanted to inspire them and teach people how to decently live their lives, but I became selfish for building a standard that I expect them to follow. I lack understanding. I’ve realized that people are individually different from each other and how their life has been growing up has influenced them. And life has taught them. And whatever their choices are is out of my control. Sure I can inspire people, impart them what I know and nurture their minds with constant reminders not to resort to any bad decisions and acts but I cannot shape them with my own hands because they don’t owe me a favor. I cannot push them to be someone I want them to be just to please and meet my standards. It’s not caring at all, it’s selfishness. And to truly care is to teach people to be themselves in the most decent way they can.

To become a true stoic is to not be a snowflake. “Snowflakes, whether they are on the left or the right, are miserable because they need the world to be a certain way--their way. They are constantly at risk of being upset and disturbed because someone else--someone with views different than their own--has the power to say or do or think for themselves. A Stoic, on the other hand, is open-minded and content to let others live and think as they wish.”

Being that super confined kind of a person, I forgot that each people has their own ways on how to live their lives. And what is effective for me cannot always be that effective to them. I judge them because they do something I don’t, and just because I don’t like them I automatically omit the value of their ideas. Which isn’t a trait of a true stoic. And for someone like me who aspires to Influence others. I realized that in order to teach people is truly understand them for who they are.

I might have really been selfish especially to the people who matters to me because I get upset just because they don’t completely meet the standards I solely created for myself, which technically means it could only work for myself and not for others.

For years, this is what’s actually missing. Acceptance of others. I’ve confined myself within my own bars. And to truly love people is to truly accept and understand them. And teach them without and judgement. I have realized that whatever they like and believe in as long as it does not harm themselves or anyone is not as bad as I think it was. And that people’s uniqueness is what made each one of us distinctive and beautiful. And I am happy to finally accept everyone for who they are and unload these wrong expectations. We are all beautiful human beings and we are designed to be different for a reason. Let’s empower each other’s difference.

Much love,

Chi ♥️

Althroughout my life, I thought my biggest fear was stepping out in public, being on the spotlight around strangers. But growing up, I realized that it is the fear of being stuck in constant, to not being able to develop and learn holistically. Yes, fear of losing someone is one, but is losing them the one you are really scared of? No, it is the feeling of the aftermath, the feeling of not hearing their voice, not seeing their face, not feeling their touch. And you'd cry out of grief, you'd cry out of loneliness, but the world doesn't stop there. You continue to live, living the memories they've left behind, holding onto the hope that they're still there.

I fear of becoming stagnant, not being able to move forward. Living a life like doesn't seem to exist. That's the logic about life, every day you live, every moment you cherish, you move forward. No matter what circumstances, you should move forward; you feel every emotion, you treasure every memory, and you continue.

Happiness is indeed brought to us by family and friends, just as we also provide them enjoyment. But of course, we cannot be happy all the time. We sometimes doubt ourselves and be in that position when we feel that we are not enough, that we are just not deserving of what the world offers to us, which leads to depression, anxiety, and the worst is committing suicide. 

Our lives are like these different colors in a Crayola box that our lives are all like paintings made up of various colors and shades to make art. And it's up to us to live a colorful life showing off these brighter colors rather than giving attention to these dull colors to create a masterpiece of our own.

In life, We should constantly choose or try to be in a happier position. Even if we feel that this present generation doesn't satisfy us or life is not the way we want it to be, even we encounter undesirable things, it'll be okay at the end of the day as long as we live the moment.

In my early morning lull while staying at home for almost 6 weeks since the enhanced community quarantine, I found myself listening to Hillsong’s Peace Project Album which plays a compilation of Christmas Songs that I used to listen in the Christmas season of 2019. I sat by the chair alone in my room, and I shut the doors close to have an intimate moment while adjusting just the right amount of volume on my headphones. Little by little, I found myself captivated by the music and lyrics, my emotions uplifted until I am grooving and dancing to the beat of the songs.

As I was being carried away, I suddenly felt an amount of joyfulness sprinkled into my soul. My mind wandered in remembering how Christmas was. The time when everyone feels warm, cheery, and light-spirited in celebrations with family, loved ones, friends, or co-workers. The time when even as early as September, people get excited by the thought of anticipating it. The time that turned unlikely different compared to what the world is collectively experiencing right now.  Fast forward from the merriest and the most wonderful time of the year, maybe like me, you came to ask about these questions:

Is it possible to be joyful and hopeful even in this time of uncertainty and difficulty? Where can joy and hope be found during this global health crisis?

As a Christian believer, it amazes me how God uses creative ways of communicating to us personally. In church, it was taught that God is loving and intimately close to us that if people are only aware and willing to listen, they can see the limitless opportunities of God reaching on them to call their attention. As for me, reminiscing about Christmas and its songs, were the means of God in speaking the truths that encouraged me just when I needed it the most. I hope to share with you, how God spoke to me by listening to these songs and by devoting a time to hear His still small voice in the middle of all the distracting noises around.

Given the unprecedented event that we are facing today, we cannot blame ourselves for feeling negative. For humans to feel fearful, anxious, depressed, or hopeless because of bad circumstances are totally normal. Humans are emotional beings, and it is a part of our mechanism to feel the way we feel in order to adapt to the given situation. And as rational human beings, we still have the authority not to let our problems control us. You are capable to control what you will feel and how you will behave in whatever uncontrollable situation that may come your way. I hope that you will not wait for this global health crisis to end before you choose to be joyful. Know that you can still find and choose joy in whatever painful, depressing, or hopeless situation you are in right now. When joy only depends in the happy events of life such as birthdays, graduations, promotions, or travels, then expect joy to be robbed of you for almost always. Do not wait for the world to give you joy, but you can approach the one true source of joy. That joy can only be found in God. If He is the source of joy, then our joy will be richly sustained and surely available for our times of trouble and need. Carry the joy of the Lord through the good and bad times. You can still find joy when you anchor it not to whatever uncertain event life may give, but to the one who is constant, faithful, unfailing, and everlasting. Choosing to remain in God is allowing yourself to experience the joy which shall overflow and bless those around you.

Be joyful always, pray at all times, be thankful in all circumstances. This is what God wants from you in your life in union with Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 GNT)

First point is that you can freely choose the joy whose source is God. The joy that will remain in you both during the season of blessing and most especially during the season of life’s testing. Being joyful while having faith to who He says He is and to the promises that He kept for those who believe.

Moving on, picture with me a typical church service every Christmas season. I know that you imagine the colorful decorations, spirit-filled choir singers, and the gift-giving activities. If you are a regular church goer, the story of Jesus’ birth has been familiar to you already. But, do you remember the central message taught back then? How the reason of the season was often emphasized for us not to forget given our tendency to be busy about Christmas schedules and agendas? Now, I understand why we must be reminded of the reason of that season. The reason of that season, which is Jesus born to be our Savior, must be alive in our hearts in no other time but now when hope is so difficult to find. If we acknowledge that Christmas is nothing without Christ, then having Christ as the Savior of the World is what should give us hope. Jesus became the Savior because He knew that we would go through problems in this life that only Him is capable to save us through.

Not only is He our Savior, but He is also the Emmanuel. Do you remember what the name Emmanuel stands for? It means God with Us. How amazing that our Savior not only saves but that he also promises to be with us always. To walk with us and remain in us through His spirit’s presence and word. Where can we find hope? We can find hope through the finish work of our Savior on the cross when He conquered our greatest problem of sin and death 2,000 years ago. We hope on His many promises including the eternal life for those who will believe in what He has done.

Let us hold on firmly to the hope we profess, because we can trust God to keep his promise (Hebrews 10:23 GNT) 

Second point is that we can have hope because as followers of Jesus, we are marching not just towards our personal or everyday victory, but towards the eternal glory that Jesus prepared for us. Our hope will bring us security and confidence in this present lifetime until eternity. For it is not called hoping if what we are hoping for is right in front of us already. Therefore, we keep our eyes fixed on the things unseen and yet to be unveiled before us.

As I end, I want you to remember Christ in Christmas- the reason of the season. May this always resonate in our hearts. May we never forget of the joy and hope that Christ made available for us already and is still available for us today. Whoever and wherever you are, you can ask him to fill you with that joy and hope right now. How could the God who loves you, will not also give you these things that you ask of him?  You can ask God to give you an overflow, especially in this time when physical contact and touch is limited because of social distancing, family gatherings and reunions restricted by enhanced community quarantine, life-filled colorful streets turned into empty spaces of military checkpoints.

In spite it all, gift giving remained. Individuals, families, and organizations joining to extend a helping hand in providing food, medical supplies, and other necessities for the ill-patients, the front liners, the mentally and emotionally vulnerable, and the poor people in our society, should richly bless our hearts. But most of all, we can give because someone first gave us the greatest gift of all. Freely given once and for all. On that one silent night in the humble town of Bethlehem, the gift comes in the name of Jesus, the Lord and Savior of us all.