May 20, 2021
I’ve found what Legolas does to keep himself busy in Mordor 😂😭 @burning-quesadilla @the-reformed-ringwraith @councilofelrond
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I’ve found what Legolas does to keep himself busy in Mordor 😂😭 @burning-quesadilla @the-reformed-ringwraith @councilofelrond
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Legolas has a hick accent (at least in Sindarin.
Sauron (in my headcanon) has a really thick Irish accent because Angbandian.
Conclusion: Neither can understand the other AT ALL. In this essay I will—
Mairon: I love you.
Legolas, not paying attention: What was that?
Mairon: I said I’m selling you to the zOo-
This is the End
Prologue
TW: implied mention of non-con/rape(kind of)
It was over. The war was over and Sauron won.
Legolas shaked, peering around the large room as he reminisced of how he came to be in this cursed place.
Sauron's servants had captured the eight of the Fellowship that still lived, keeping them locked in the dungeons of Mordor. Oh, Legolas still felt the fresh pain pierce his heart as the sound of the hobbits cries had ringed in his ears. They, all of the fellowship too, had gone through so much. What sorrow as it was all for naught. Sauron has the ring and no force was to ever bring it out of his dark clutches again.
But that's getting off topic isn't it? After days of no food nor light in the dank dungeon, all eight were brought up to stand before the dark lord. He mocked them, of how they failed, of how they were so close. Of how they had no hope now.
He threatened to torture them, kill them. Mulled and debated with himself of if he should make them slaves or just put them back in the dungeons to rot. Legolas couldn't stand the despair on his friends faces. They didn't deserve this. The final straw was when Sauron made talk of turning Frodo into turning into a... it was disgusting. Incorrigible. Absolutely and totally blasphemous. Legolas wanted to gag at the thought of the possibilities if he hadn't stepped in when he did.
Finally getting to the point. Legolas couldn't take it anymore and... offered... himself. To Sauron in exchange for safety of his friends.
Legolas mulled over the events of the last week sitting in the dark room, wondering what exactly was to happen next as he waited for his 'master' to arrive.
Inspired by the legolas/mairon posts from: @gossip-girl-of-middle-earth @ibrithir-was-here @the-reformed-ringwraith @councilofelrond @burning-quesadilla
Elves like music. Sauron forges things. Would it be a complete stretch to say that Mairon would make an instrument for Legolas, even though Legolas isn’t exactly musically inclined? I’m thinking something with a dark yet beautiful tone... a clarinet. The joints and keys can both be made of metal, with only padding, cork, and reeds as the non-metal equipment needed. The clarinet is the perfect instrument. And metal clarinets have the ability to sound beautiful despite their somewhat troubling reputation, I’ve heard them in use. In conclusion, Mairon makes Legolas a metal clarinet so he can remember the music from his home.
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Mairon: *Gets down on one knee*
Legolas: Oh my Eru, it’s finally happening
Mairon: *Falls over*
Legolas: The poison is kicking in
SAUROLAS WAS IN MAY!?!?!?! THATS SEVEN MONTHS AGO!!! IT FEELS LIKE YESTERDAY!!
We had created something so beautiful, so dangerous, so… iconic. Now look at us. What are we? What do we have left but the ruins of what once was? We were once a proud people, united by a similar cause. I fear the world shall never be the same post-Saurolas.
Mairon: I'm a reverse necromancer.
Legolas: Isn't that just killing people?
Mairon: Ah, technicality.