Five years ago I woke up from surgery thinking everything was going to get better from then on, but boy was I wrong. I had just gotten surgery to repair my left ureter, I found out the next week that my other ureter needed fixing too. This journey began in October & ended in June. It left me with an oxy addiction & some pretty bad ptsd from almost dying from sepsis my last trip to the hospital. It took me 2 years to ditch the oxy & dope. & 3 years of being on suboxone to find what works for my “mood disorder” (I’m only diagnosed with an unspecified mood disorder, because I’m a tough case to figure out) but I am here. 3 years & some change clean from opiates, figuring out my mental health, I feel like I’m doing well. But my vitamin c count is acting up again & it makes me think back to being at children’s every week & it scares the living daylights out of me. I’m just hoping that if I have to go through another rough journey, it’s for a better reason, a better outcome than what happened 5 years ago. But remember, I am recovering, everyday I am taking steps closer & closer to getting to where I want & think I should be. Illness is not easy, whether it is physical & chronic, mental & chronic, or just a really bad flu. & YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON BEHIND CLOSED DOORS. I was bullied my senior year, 5 years ago because everyone thought I was making up this hardship. That it wasn’t really happening, I just didn’t want to work to graduate. Which was the furthest from the truth. So I’ll just leave this here...I don’t care if this girl stole your boyfriend or that she talked shit about you once. I don’t care about the drama. If someone is going through something & you may be able to help or even prevent it, step the fuck up. Do your good deed, sheath your weapon of words, I promise it’s much better than all the hate. Xoxo 💛 #recovery #laydownyourweapons (at Boston Children's Hospital)
