#lady bits

Amayian gets better with Leliana teaching him. Alexandra is a born natural.

First and foremost: I have an appointment Friday morning with my primary care provider. She’s going to give me a check up and refer me to a neurologist if she thinks anything’s amiss. (She did not like the ‘everyone’s allowed one seizure’ line.) I spoke with the nurse before booking the appointment and told her what went down. She made me feel better about it all and told me I should never experience that level of pain during a pap smear.

After doing some research, I’ve reached some conclusions. One, the speculum used was unfamiliar to me. It was plastic. And it made a clicking sound when opened. I suppose I’m more familiar with the metal ones? Anyway, when the speculum was opened, it hit my cervix with each click. I remember distinctly three clicks and three jabs. That’s where the pain originated, not the insertion of the speculum or the swabbing. When I flinched, I must have dislodged the speculum because the clicking happened a second time and there were three more jabs to my cervix. It felt like being stabbed. I stopped breathing, which lead to me passing out once I sat up after the exam was over.

Two, the nurse or midwife doing the exam was probably inexperienced. As far as I can tell. She was younger than me. The only other times I’ve had a pap, it was handled by older men. It was in, swab, out and done. This pap took longer than normal.

Three, my blood pressure was 90/something before the pap smear and I hadn’t had time to eat or drink anything that morning. After fainting and seizing, my blood pressure was 111/something. I felt better after waking up from the seizure than before I had the pap smear, strangely. 

On his desk or the war table, I’d imagine.

I went to the women’s clinic for my check up and I passed out after the pap smear and had a seizure?!?!?!

I’ve never seized before. I’ve passed out plenty of times. The best they can figure is that I held my breath too long during the exam, which HURT. This is my third in my life, being my asexy self and not being sexually active and no history of cancer in the family, and the other two were mildly uncomfortable. This one was a son of a bitch! The only thing I can come up with is that I had a nurse practitioner and even though I told her I was a virgin, and even though she used the smallest one, she wasn’t as practiced as the doctors I’d seen before. That little clicky thing happened twice, I guess to open me up. Jesus Christ. I don’t remember anyone having to use that tool before. 

Anyway, I’m at home now and have been told to stay in bed all day. I feel fine. I feel better than before the seizure, actually! Feels like I’ve had a nice nap. I was out for about two minutes. 

Meh, I wish I know why! It was painful, sure, but not nearly as painful as a Crohn’s flareup. Thankfully those are getting milder the healthier I become with my exercise and eating habits. I’m doing very well!