#kuwtk

kylie early 2010s 💘

Maverick is the sort of Kim K character that rose to fame through his crazy antics and A-List contacts from his teens to his early twenties, gets offered a reality tv show. (yes im keeping the leaked sex tape story, you will have to pry it from my cold dead hands) Of course he agrees because not only is it an easy source of income, but it also gets him into the headlines.

Carol, the heiress of a real-estate enterprise, and her Navy boyfriend are reoccurring characters on the show, and fan favourites. Mav gets accused of spreading military propaganda on his show every 2-3 business days, even though they never talk about what exactly Gooses job is. He is seen wearing his uniform a total of 15 seconds at most before he changes into his brightest patterned shirts. (He surprised Carol with coming back from his deployment early)

The planning of the wedding is a whole season in itself, and they sell a DVD of the ceremony, which Goose jokes is going to be their “future children's college fund, when I’m done spending Carol’s fortune with Mav!”

As soon as Bradley is born, Carol has Mav move in with them because Goose gets stationed overseas for a few months, and ohgod does the media have a field day with that. They accuse Mav of stealing Carol from Goose, the words of “obscure love triangle” get thrown around A LOT. So he moves into the house next door to give Carole a break.

Meanwhile, Mav is having the biggest, completely unrelated, existential crisis of his life behind closed doors. Because for some reason Tom Kazansky of all people, the man who is the biggest name in fashion and one of the most iconic creative directors, moves into the house right across his backyard. And oh my god, he’s so hot. Mav always knew that he wasn’t exactly straight, but yep, that year was the one where he realised that he was definitely bi if not gay. Also, that season Mav throws 13 parties in hopes of Tom attending even one of them (he didn’t) and gets absolutely ripped apart because by the third party it all looks unfathomably cheugy.

When Bradley is around six years old, Goose dies. They don’t film a season that year. Or the following.

When they do start up again, the headlines shift. Nobody wonders if Carol and Mav are together anymore- they just assume they are, considering they are basically co-parenting Bradley. Meanwhile, he has finally caught the attention of Tom, while they weren’t exactly dating, they were also not seeing anyone else. Well, until Tom sold his house and moved to Europe overnight, without saying goodbye or calling Mav once.

In his infinite wisdom, Mav decides to marry his close friend Penny Benjamin in a shotgun wedding a few weeks after that. Everyone is happy with that. Penny finally got away from her obsessive, cheating ex-husband after 15 years. Baby Amelia and Penny’s older kids, Daria and Glenn get a bonus Dad and a weird pseudo sibling in Bradley.

Most of the following seasons is just depicting the obscure world of this weird patchwork family, and the kids going through middle and high school. After a while, Mav and Penny get divorced because they realise they are better off as friends.

Bradley is pretty much considerd to be the king of all nepo babies, and no matter WHAT he does someone will say that he doesnt deserve it.

He also regularly gets absolutely flamed for his hawaiian shirts, he takes it on the chin tho because most of them are Gooses and he doesnt care about what fashion critiques have to say about him! (especially not after they act like Mav is Aphrodite reincarnated when he pulls up to a function in a sleeveless shirt and slighty longer hair. ew)

Mav and Ice finally get their shit together after almost 16 years of pining (yay) but decide to keep their relationship private (nay). That season Bradley constantly talked about Mav's "situationship" to the cameras in the solo interviews.

Mav also makes it a point to comment on every and any new slang word the kids use in front of him. The ones he list is the following:

stan - Mav: "Who the hell is Stan and why do Bradley and Amelia want to be him so bad? Also... why are we talking like Yoda, is that cool again?"

big mood - Mav: "So, is it like, feeling big emotions? But then anything would be a 'big mood'. There is nothing this family doesn't do big. WAIT NO THAT SOUNDED WRONG! YOU KNOW I DIDN'T MEAN-"

vibe check - Mav: "Trust me when I tell you, I was the first to fall for the whole vibe changing oil diffusers and weird room mists. That does not work, I have no Idea how the kids even thought of that. That was like 15 years ago..."

rizz - Mav: "Can I be honest... I thought we were talking about the crackers. Ritz crackers, y'know!"

no thoughts, head empty - Mav: "God I though the dog was having a medical emergency but they were just calling him stupid!"

brainrot - Mav: "Once again, almost called a doctor, but turned out be stupid. I don't know if this says more about me or the kids..."

GOAT - Mav: "I though it meant something bad and grounded the kids... yes both Carole and Penny yelled at me..."

divider by @cafekitsune

don't forget to like and reblog if you enjoyed this post!