#kuroshitsuji dagger

Heavy on Beast with this one...

I JUST NOTICED THAT IN THIS PANNEL DAGGER IS TAKING A GROUP OF KIDS TO BARON KELVIN (probably) JUST AGTER THEY SAVE SNAKE

LOOK AT THIS

Kuroshitsuji characters:

- Joker.

- Dagger.

- Undertaker.

This request has like all my favs?? A request with both Doll, Haruhi, Dagger, and L? SIGN ME UP. Hope you enjoy, babe!

The look on his partner’s face spoke more truth than their words would. They were captivated by something he couldn’t quite put his finger on, in a daze as they slouched uncomfortably, reminding him of a haze. L frowned, his thumb brushing his bottom lip as he edged closer to them, silently observing them for the past few moments and they still hadn’t bothered to notice.

Sure, he was endeavoring in his work for the past hour or so, but he still kept them close by to ensure they didn’t feel lonely. He even went as far to tell his significant other how he enjoyed their company, that it made him feel safe. L, in all his life, hadn’t felt safe. Not even before he was the legendary L. He spent his childhood only focused on furthering his gift that was recognized by many, but treated as an outcast to others. It made him feel insecure, and as he thought back to that feeling he came to the realization.

They didn’t feel safe with him - no, no, Y/N did feel safe with him, they didn’t feel secure. They didn’t feel secure in themselves.  But for what reason?

His thought process came to a halt as Y/N’s eyes shot a confused glossed over stare, asking the question in itself.

“Dear…” His arms dropped, hanging at his sides, knees at his chest in his default position, “Why are you insecure?”

By the look on their face, if his partner had been drinking something, they would’ve spat it out. They silently knew there was no way getting around the question would solve anything, as he was the great L. Master of all deductions. And he found it out without so much as a clue.

A drawn in sigh left their forehead in deep wrinkles, frown deepening, and the bags under their eyes creasing as they offered a soft murmur.

“I don’t know… I just am, and I just feel like. . L, don’t you want someone else? You know someone a little prettier, a little smarter? Someone who’s worthy of you?”

What a stupid question, L thought. Why would he need someone smarter, or prettier, when he had Y/N? If anything, at times he believed he was the lucky one for finding such a keeper, but unfortunately they felt so low about themselves not to see that.

“Y/N, I don’t like to repeat myself so please keep this in mind if this issue arises again. . You have thoroughly showed me how genuinely amazing you are, time and time again, you’re far too beautiful in both personality and physically for me to want someone else, and half the time you outsmart me. Now how am I ever going to find someone better than Y/N?”

And with that, the issue was never brought up again as it was proven just how L feels about that sentiment.

~

Haruhi’s hair was neatly combed back, but more thoroughly than usual to expose those big brown eyes that were so adored by Y/N. For such a long time, Y/N had admired the beauty of the girl, loving the way Haruhi was gifted with such a spectacular talent at accepting people no matter what they looked like or identified themselves as. She was more blase about certain topics but the way her eyes brightened when standing up for those she cared about was what really got Y/N going.

The small female then cleared her throat, her hands nervously clasped together as she finished her sentiment, “And that is exactly how I feel about you, Y/N-chan.” A forced smile was given on her end, giving Y/N the signal she was over.

You were utterly speechless. Haruhi Fujioka, a girl who dressed as the opposite sex without a care to give about it, having charmed multiple girls and a few of the Hosts along with that, had just confessed to you. By the looks of it, she even had gotten dolled up for you, as she wore an ironed skirt and a button up dress shirt, making her even more captivating looking. You had been in love with her for as long as you could remember, only falling more deeply once you found out her true gender, but here she was.

It felt surreal and made you feel sick.

You felt sick because it was like a dream come true, but like it was supposed to be some kind of sick joke. Your hands shook as you avoided eye contact, your bottom lip trembling and scared tears were going to run down your face.

Luckily, that didn’t happen.

Knowing you were driving Haruhi crazy not knowing your answer, you quietly asked, “Is this a joke, Fujioka?”

“What? No! What kind of person do you think I am- I just really care about you, Y/N. You make me happy and I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone like you.”

Your eyes narrowed, as you turned to gaze at her, “Really? But everyone loves you, you’re so pretty and classy, even the Hosts like you. You deserve someone who’s good enough for you. No one likes me. No one’s ever liked me. You deserve someone everyone likes.” You concluded your speech confidently, fully prepared for her to agree and come to her senses, but instead you felt a small hand clasp your own and you met the eyes that made you melt.

“You don’t get it, do you, L/N-chan? It doesn’t matter who likes me, or who likes you, or what your social standing is, or what mine is. All that matters is that we’re two people who care about each other and are fully ready to make each other happy. Can I make you happy?”

Biting your lip, you nodded eagerly, tears spilling down your cheeks as you murmured, “You already have.”

~

The audience roared in applause as Beast finished up her act with Betty, the act that she could tame a tiger was truly magnificent, but you weren’t focused on that. Instead, you felt yourself becoming more and more jealous as you watched her. Her thighs proportionate with her body, falling in beautiful curves and skin an olive color, while her tummy was flat and her bust large. Her lips were vibrant and classic, her hair falling in perfect curls and eyes that struck you as something out of a dream. You weren’t thinking these things out of love, but more of jealousy. As much you appreciated Beast and her friendship, at times you felt that Dagger did deserve someone like her.

Someone as pretty and extraordinary as her, right? After all, he did give up on trying to get her to like him and settled for you. When he first confessed you were shocked, but happy, but overtime your happiness shifted into that of guilt. You felt as though you were keeping him from his happiness.

After all, maybe Beast could be harboring feelings for him this whole time and the two of them didn’t even know. Maybe she was keeping it a secret since you were his significant other, you weren’t sure. Your imagination wandered more and more as you stared at the girl you deemed worthy for Dagger, before two arms snaked around your waist, shuffling you closer as a head nuzzled into the crook of your neck.

“Hey blondie,” you murmured, your tone sounding nothing less than exasperated, “How you doin’?”

“Doin’ mighty fine, suga’, s’pecially since I gotta ‘uch a cute brod with me.” As he muttered that statement into your ear, you found yourself frowning before quickly changing the subject.

“Isn’t she just amazing?” You urged Dagger, eying the dark haired female that he once proclaimed love to, trying to get him to agree with you so once and for all you knew that he deserved and longed for someone much better than you.

“She sure is somethin’,” Sighed the blonde, toying with his tinged streak of navy, “But not somethin’ I want. I got me you and that’s all I’ll ever need.”

You gently nudged him off of you at that statement, your brows furrowed, perplexed by the statement. You were slightly agitated he didn’t just do you a favor and tell you the truth.

Noticing your change in behavior, he gently began to rub circles into your shoulder with the tips of his fingers; all in an attempt to soothe the internal conflict you were going through.

“Did I say somethin’ wrong, Y/N?”

He was just so darn sweet, wasn’t he? Constantly worrying if he was managing to please you, when you should be focused on pleasing him. You were to your wits end with him most of the time only because of how perfect he could be. He had unremarkable beauty, and talent, and you couldn’t help but feel he deserved someone who matched that.

“No, no, it’s not you. It’s not you at all.” You started in. “Something has been on my mind lately though, I need to get it off my chest. I’ve been thinking, and… maybe we’re not right for each other–”

“What?!” Melodrama ensues instantly from in, tears already beginning to form.

“No, Dagger, wait until I–”

“No, Y/N! No! I love you more than anything! Please, I-I’ll try to be a better boyfriend! I’m sorry for not treating you as good as you shoul–”

“Dammit, Dagger, will you just listen to me? It has nothing to do with you. I just think you deserve someone who’s good enough for you. Much prettier, and smarter, and actually, y’know, talented. That would be for the best.”

Dagger’s stunned by your words, but perplexed at the same time. He turns from your gaze, before tears roll down his cheeks and he stares at the ground for a long time before knowing he had gathered everything he wanted to say. He feels like the guilty one now, knowing that his partner has felt this way all this time and he hasn’t done enough to convince them otherwise.

“Y/N, now I see why ya been mentionin’ Beast so much lately, I been thinking you were ready to leave me for ‘er. This makes a lot more sense. . You’re hardly ever wrong, but this time you’re the farthest from the truth. I’ve never had anythin’ to call my own, or anyone who wanted to call me their own. But every since I met you, and you made me feel wanted and I wanted you so very badly, I knew that I could never lose that feelin’ again, you hear me? I’m not going to lose it, and I won’t lose you. I don’t want anyone else. I just want you.”

~

“You’re not good enough for her. You know it, don’t you? She’s been blessed with beauty I can’t describe and she’s got a laugh that makes me so happy I think I might cry. She claims to love you, but she shouldn’t love you. She deserves someone better. Everyone’s repulsed by you, she doesn’t deserve someone like that. She’s going to realize it soon.” You said these words without thought to your reflection, twisting and squeezing sides of your body you thought were too big and harbored too much fat in some areas, while jabbing at areas that lacked enough balance and you grimaced entirely. Your face you hardly bothered to look at, there was too much in that area to dislike.

You whole heartedly believed that this was true. Why would Doll want someone like you? You had been confused ever since the confession that spilled out, all in an accident while the other crew members laughed and teased her as her face shined brighter than a Christmas ornament. You remember the warmness and embarrassment that washed in you all at once after that moment. But even then you were plagued with a yearning for her. A yearning for her to have her happiness fulfilled.

“You really think that’s going to happen? Why do you say that about yourself?” Tears streaked Doll’s face as you turned, ashamed to face her and bewildered all at once.

You hadn’t thought she was going to hear it. You needed someone to vent to about it, and since you had no one besides Doll, you talked to your reflection. You immediately regretted the words as you saw how much misery it brought the angel-like trapeze artist.

“It’s… It’s true!” You broke down into sobs now, the both of you crying due to the fact you couldn’t stand seeing the sight of each other in pain.

Doll allowed her emotions to seep down her cheeks, before she eventually closed the space between the two of you in a hug. It remained like that for what felt like hours until the both of you calmed.

Pairing: Joker/Dagger Word Count: 491 Words Triggers: Mentions of chest binding Summary: Dagger helps Joker feel better after a performance. Feat. trans boy Joker. Takes place in the canon ‘verse, more or less.