#koclain

They didn’t think Lance was even alive. Even after they got Blue into the hangar and him inside a healing pod, nobody thought that he had a chance. So now, having him in such a healthy condition is nothing short of a miracle. Pidge shuddered at the memory. Everyone cried for hours after Lance was put into the healing pod.

She couldn’t live through something like that again.

Pidge checked the monitor on the pod’s screen. She didn’t know how to read the Altean language, but she knew that all of the full, green bars meant that Lance was good to go. His vitals were normal and healthy. So, why wasn’t the pod releasing him?

“Allura, could you come look at this for a second? I think the pod is bugging out.”

Allura rubbed her eyes as she walked over. In addition to crying, none of them had gotten much sleep since that battle. She squinted at the bright blue panel. “You’re right. Lance should’ve been released by now.” She tapped a few buttons, resulting in a big red sign flashing onto the screen. She hummed. “It says that the patient isn’t healed yet. How peculiar.”

Hunk walked over next. He looked down at the screen with squinted eyes and a confused frown. “Lance looks healthy. It’s probably glitched.”

“Well, then I guess I’ll just let him out myself, then,” Allura mumbled. She tapped another sequence of buttons, making the door open with a hiss.

As the fog pooled around their feet, Lance slumped against the back of the pod. His eyes slowly pushed themselves open, though he looked grumpy and tired. “Hey, guys.” Lance stood up straight and cracked his neck. He blinked a few times as if he couldn’t believe he was really there. “What’d I miss?”

Those five words made a collective weight fall off of everyone’s shoulders. Lance was okay. With any luck, he’d be back in his lion in a few days. For now, some food and a blanket would be more than enough.

“You must be starving,” Hunk said as they walked to the kitchen. “I created a new recipe with the ingredients I bought from our last trip to the space mall. Side note: those purple discs that looked like pepperoni are nothing like pepperoni.”

Lance laughed. “Sounds great, Hunk.”

While the rest of the team walked along, Keith wandered off on his own. He chewed his bottom lip as he went, a stupid habit that he couldn’t break. It didn’t bother him, but it drove Shiro crazy.

Lance sat at the head of the table, eager to try out Hunk’s latest dish. Pidge sat to his left. The seat across from her was probably going to be for Hunk. Lance began to ask a question but stopped short as someone draped his signature green jacket over his head.

“Thought you might be cold,” Keith said as he took that empty seat.

“Thanks, man,” Lance smiled, because yeah, he was cold. He slipped into the jacket, content with the familiar lightweight on his shoulders. A small reminder of home, and all of what awaited him there. He watched Keith scoot into the table with that smile stuck on his face. “I must’ve really stressed you guys out. Just look at the bags under Keith’s eyes.”

Shiro sighed. “Yeah, we were all very worried about you. But you’re better now, so let’s just try to relax.”

It was like Shiro cast a spell on them. Everyone relaxed and joked around with each other. No one yelled at Lance when he flicked some goop into Allura’s hair. Everyone laughed when Pidge used her spoons to “block out the haters.” They practically lost it when everyone began speaking through memes, leaving Allura and Coran in the dust. For a brief, shining moment, they were all kids again. The fate of the universe didn’t rest on their shoulders. They weren’t in the middle of a space war. Countless alien races weren’t praying for them to succeed. They were just five, stupid kids that wanted to have fun.

...

Just days later, and they were at it again. Zarkon’s generals were trying to invade a planet, and it had to be defended. If he got control of it, then he would gain access to a whole portion of the galaxy. Voltron would be right back where they started.

It came down to the bridge. All of the paladins were fighting as hard as they could, but it just didn’t seem like it was enough. Lance grunted as he ducked to avoid a punch. He should’ve just stayed with his lion; he felt practically useless in hand-to-hand combat. He had a gun, how was he supposed to be helpful?

It didn’t help that the Galra soldier stood a whole foot taller than he did. Lance always thought he was tall at six feet, but he felt tiny compared to his opponent. His head was about as thick as the Galra’s arm. He ducked again, losing his balance for a moment.

“Die, blue paladin!” The monster roared.

Lance shot his giant arm. He tried to run backward and tripped over his own two feet.

The Galra soldier towered over him, laughing. His arm didn’t even appear to bother him. He pointed his gun at Lance’s head. “Die, blue paladin!”

Lance didn’t even have time to cry. By reflex, he extended a hand and prayed for a smooth death.

But the blow never came.

Lance looked up. His hand felt freezing cold like he had stuck it in ice water. The Galra soldier was frozen in ice himself. Even surrounded by ice, being on the wrong end of a gun scared Lance. A chill ran down his spine, realizing he came face to face with the barrel.

“Lance!” Keith screamed. He ran over and dropped to his knees. “Are you okay? I knew I should’ve helped you sooner-” Keith scooped him into his arms, mumbling apologies and complaints.

He hated to admit it, but Lance was grateful for Keith’s help. He tried to give him a hug back, but Keith dropped him to the floor. “Ow! What the heck, Keith-”

The rest of the team came running over. “Keith? What happened to your armor?” Shiro asked, pointing at Keith’s back. A big block of ice had formed.

Keith shrugged. “I-I don’t know. I was helping Lance up. He put his hand on my back, and suddenly it just felt cold. Really cold.”

Everyone looked at Lance in horror. He stared back at them with the same look. What could this mean? Since when did he have the ability to create ice? It just didn’t make any sense. And it broke Lance’s heart to see everyone look at him as if he were the new monster. As if he had tried to hurt Keith.

“Let’s get back to the castle. Coran or Allura may know what to do,” Pidge suggested.

Hunk reached out a hand to help Lance up, but Shiro pulled it away. He looked at Lance with unease. “We don’t know what would happen. It’s best not to take any chances.”

“Right, yeah,” Lance mumbled. He pushed himself to his feet and followed the others. They walked in silence back to their lions. He had no idea when the rest of the battle had been taken care of, but he was thankful for everyone’s help all the same.

The aliens of that planet looked at him with fear, too. Lance nodded as he walked by, refusing to let them see how much it hurt. He learned that lesson a long time ago.

Back at the castle, Coran and Allura were at a loss. They made Lance stand up on a platform so they could look him up and down. Pidge and Hunk took notes, while Keith and Shiro watched from afar. They were all studying him like he was some lab rat. Lance felt much worse than a common rodent. He was a mutant, a freak. He bit his cheek to keep from breaking down in front of them.

“He looks fine to me. Nothing out of the ordinary,” Hunk mumbled. He scratched his cheek in thought.

Pidge dropped her notebook and gasped in horror. “What if this happened when he got electrocuted? His lion has ice powers. Those powers must’ve been transferred to Lance.”

“But how?” Keith asked. His arms were crossed as usual, and he had the same grumpy look on his face.

Lance couldn’t help his next comment. He had to keep up appearances, after all. “Aw, are you jealous that you didn’t get your lion’s powers first? Don’t go electrocuting yourself to keep up in our rivalry, okay?”

Keith growled in annoyance. “I’m not jealous, you idiot! We’re trying to figure out what happened to you so we can fix it!”

“Careful, Keith. I’ve got ice powers, but I might not be as willing as Elsa to let things go.”

Shiro stepped in front of Keith, for the sake of everyone in the room. “Alright, enough with the petty arguing. We’ve got to figure him out.” He sent another look at Lance. It wasn’t as bad as before, but Lance got the message. He was dangerous now.

Allura hummed. “I’m sure that’s why the healing pod wouldn’t let him out. He wasn’t the same as before, but there probably wasn’t a way to fix it.”

“Does that mean I’m stuck like this?” Lance whined. His hands felt colder. He wiped them on his pants, hoping that’d help. They seemed to colder the more he worried. He did it again, if for nothing other than to create friction. He sighed.

Everyone saw his breath as if it were freezing cold in the room, not a comfortable room temperature.

“I’ve never seen anything like it,” Coran whispered. He fiddled with the end of his mustache to keep his hands distracted.

Lance shook his head. “I’m going to warm up.” He walked away from everyone, leaving them to stand around in shock.

The tension in the air constantly grew stronger, until everyone was suffocating in it. No one said a word. What was there to say?

Lance didn’t leave his room for the next three days. He refused. Everyone knocked at his door, hoping that it’d make some sort of difference. Keith threatened to kick it open. Hunk tried bribing him with delicious food. Allura practically begged. None of it worked. Lance stayed in bed, huddled under as many blankets as he could grab during the night.

It did nothing, though. The blankets. Lance knew that Coran turned up the temperature in his room, but he still shook with the chills. He saw fog with every breath. His teeth chattered beyond control. It wasn’t like that all the time...just when he really thought about the situation. He grew colder and colder as he grew more and more panicked.

Pidge knocked at the door. She sighed. “Lance? Would you please come out? I know you’re not going to hurt any of us. We all know that.”

“You don’t know that I won’t hurt you by accident,” Lance replied. He wiped at some tears. He already hurt all of his loved ones on Earth by disappearing without a trace. He had hurt so many people before that. No more.

“I’m working on some gloves that’ll protect you. Your Elsa comment made me think of it. It’s going to take a while, but I’m working on it.”

Lance shook his head. It was useless. “Thanks, Pidge, but don’t bother. Let Allura pilot Blue or something; I can’t do it.”

Pidge kicked the door. She kicked it again and punched it. “Stop just throwing us away! We’re trying to help you! We need you, Lance!” She kicked the door one last time. How could Lance just abandon all hope? How could he just throw away his responsibilities and give up on Blue? He loved Blue.

Truth is, he still did. Lance wiped at more tears. He felt them starting to freeze against his skin. “Pidge, please just go away.”

“No! Not until you open this door.” Pidge crossed her arms. That stubborn asshole could barricade himself in there for as long as he wanted,, but he was going to come out one way or another. “I mean it. I’m not leaving.”

“Well, go ahead, then!” Lance yelled. He curled in on himself, hoping that it’d preserve some heat. Fast heart. Shallow breaths. Shaking uncontrollably, from the cold and the fear. Great. Here we go again.

Lance crawled out of bed. He sobbed, nearly dropping to his feet, but he had to stay standing. The pressure was building up inside of him. He wiped at his tears again before aiming his hands at the wall. One last sigh. Suddenly, the wall was covered in ice. Lance cried and cried, waving his hands in every pattern possible. He covered the ceiling, the floor, and all four of the walls. He locked himself in by icing the door. It wouldn’t stop―not while he was having a panic attack. He couldn’t even hug himself at this point. The ice flowed out of his hands, and there was no going back now.

Pidge stood in front of the door, tapping her foot at a rapid pace. As the ice began to form on the door, her heart dropped. “Shiro! Allura! Coran!!” Pidge ran away screaming, hoping to find anyone who’d be able to help.

Lance was finally starting to calm down. He let out another sob as he looked at his mess. “I’m a monster,” he whispered to himself. “I’m no better than the Galra.” Lance fell to the floor, sobbing into his knees. The tears wouldn’t stop coming. He felt so heavy like his body was made of lead. He didn’t even flinch when someone started pounding on the door.

“Lance! Let me in!” Keith screamed. He kicked and punched it, just like Pidge did. “I’m not playing games with you anymore! You need help!”

“I can’t! I can’t let you in!” Lance cried. “I iced the door shut! And I could hurt you! You should see the mess I’ve made, Keith,” he sobbed. He looked around the room and wiped at his eyes. His hands were still cold to the bone. “I don’t want any of you to get hurt.”

Keith growled. “I don’t care about getting hurt! Let me help you! Let me in!” He kicked the door again, but it didn’t even crack the ice. He growled and kicked it again.

The rest of the team came running over. Shiro grabbed Keith by the forearm and pulled him back a few steps. “What are you doing? He’s having a panic attack, Keith. Screaming at him will only make it worse.”

Allura put her hand on the door. She frowned at the ice. “Pidge? Do you have a weird gadget that could melt this for us? Coran could hack into the system and unlock the door for us from there.”

“On it,” Pidge saluted. Hunk followed her down the hall.

Coran stepped toward the door for a moment. “Lance? I know you’re scared. We’ll get this ice cleaned up, and we’ll figure out how to help you control your new powers. They’re not something to be afraid of, or to shy away from. Just hold on.” He waited for a response, but none came. He walked away without another word.

Shiro sighed. “We need him out here. We can’t form Voltron without him.”

“He needs us,” Allura said. She wrapped her arms around herself, staring at the door. Her eyes scanned it up and down in panic. She had asked for help from everyone in the coalition, but no one knew anything. She sighed.

Nothing about this situation made any sense.

Lance had agreed to come out of his room, but he wouldn’t get close to anyone. He trained at a different time. He ate at the table, with two empty seats between him and the person next to him. Keith was no longer the loner who stood at the edge of the group; Lance took that title away.

Now, they were on a mission to meet with the Olkari again. They had spotted a weird monster prowling around their forests and asked Voltron for some help. While the team spoke with their leader, Lance waited behind with the lions. He sat on Blue’s paw with crossed legs and arms.

“I hate this, Blue,” he mumbled to her. “I don’t want these powers. I scare the others. I can’t control it.” He bit his lip, trying to keep his heart from beating too fast. The last thing he needed was a panic attack in the middle of the forest. If the Olkari saw that, then they’d probably attack him on the spot.

A twig snapped near Red. Lance’s head snapped in that direction. There, standing beside his giant metal paw, stood something resembling a deer. It hesitantly walked over towards Blue, which is the last thing that Lance wanted. He felt his heart sink. “No, go away,” he whispered.

The deer took that as a sign to walk closer. He sniffed the air and kept walking over.

“You’re gonna get hurt,” Lance said. He slid off of Blue’s paw and crouched. He picked up a few rocks, just to be safe. If he touched the deer, it would freeze over like that Galra soldier. He’d be a monster.

The deer didn’t stop walking over, though. It’d pause now and then, but it seemed determined to get closer and closer to Lance. It terrified him. Lance threw a rock at the deer’s feet. “Run away,” he hissed. “Run away before I can’t control it anymore.” He threw some more rocks. “Get away from me!”

Tears started to roll down his face again. They felt hot against his skin, but that was probably because he grew colder. Lance took in a deep breath and sighed. He couldn’t hurt this animal. He refused to become a monster. He picked up some more rocks and threw them towards the deer. “Get out of here! Go!”

Lance broke into another silent sob. He threw one last rock in a feeble attempt to scare away the deer, but it didn’t seem to care. It was useless. He crawled back up onto Blue’s paw, praying that it’d be a safe enough distance. “Please, just get away before you get hurt,” he whimpered.

“Damn it, Lance!” Keith yelled.

Lance’s head snapped to attention. Keith stood at the edge of the clearing, covered in flames. He was on fire, but it didn’t bother him. After another chill ran down his spine, Lance realized that Keith was ignited on purpose.

“Wh-what are you doing?” Lance asked.

“I did it for you, Lance,” Keith said. He ran over to Blue’s paw, scaring away the deer in the process. “I electrocuted myself inside of Red, just like you were.”

Lance wiped his eyes and slid down to the ground. He could feel Keith’s warmth from several feet away. His desperation to feel more was almost shameful. Lance pursed his lips. “Why, Keith? Why would you do that to yourself?”

“There’s no way to get rid of your powers,” Keith began. He took a hesitant step forward. “I didn’t want you to be alone. I didn’t want you to be going through all of this by yourself.”

Lance took another step forward. “You could’ve gotten really hurt, idiot.”

“I told you a while ago that I don’t care about getting hurt.”

“But I do.”

“I don’t know why.”

“Honestly, I don’t know either, sometimes.”

The tips of their shoes connected, and then their eyes. Was it possible for a heart to beat this fast? Lance’s heart threatened to drum right out of his chest. He laughed, bringing a hand up to scratch the back of his head.

Keith dropped his gaze to watch their limp hands. “Maybe now that I have powers, too...” Hesitantly, he held Lance’s hand. They fit together like pieces of a puzzle, a very complicated puzzle that sent butterflies to both of their stomachs. Neither of them pulled away.

“Well, we both have gloves on. I don’t know if that makes a difference or not,” Lance mumbled. He laced their fingers together.

They looked up at the same time.

“Well, I have an idea. Don’t turn me into an ice cube, okay?” Keith asked with a smirk.

“Don’t burn me alive,” Lance whispered back. He swallowed the lump in his throat.

And suddenly, Keith’s hands were cupping Lance’s cheeks. And their lips were pressed together with such gentle care that it didn’t feel real.

Lance carefully snaked his hands around Keith’s waist and pulled him closer. When he finally pulled away, he couldn’t stop smiling. He laughed and rested his head on Keith’s shoulder. “I can’t believe we didn’t kill each other.”

“I can’t believe I just kissed you,” Keith said quietly, staring off into the distance. He’d never had the courage to do something that brave before. Fighting the Galra felt like a happy Saturday afternoon compared to this. He laughed, too. He just kissed Lance McClain.

“What happens now?” Lance mumbled into the crook of Keith’s neck.

“I guess we go tell the others?” He replied.

Lance smirked and pulled away. “Tell them what, exactly?”

Keith blushed, averting his gaze to the ground. Having no previous relationship experience doesn’t exactly make him an expert. Shouldn’t Lance be the one answering these questions?

He was not expecting the gentle tug on his hand. He looked up at Lance, who stared back at him with a small smile on his face. He laughed.

“Come on, you goof. I want to brag about my new boyfriend and his fire powers.”

And off they ran.

Obviously, it contradicts current canon. But ya know my children need to stop playing musical lions. I know it’s important for character development, but I still miss this :(