#kitsyfluff

Just finished printing this model of my sona

Why do you think you're incapable?

I wish I could properly explain in words but it’s like...my brain isn’t wired right or something.  Like, I’ve been at drawing since I was a little kid and taking it seriously since about 2006 or so.  I’ve been making music since about the same time.  Been writing personal essays for even longer.

But everything just comes out so...amateurish, my art and music especially.  It doesn’t look like the efforts of someone who’s been drawing for over a decade.  It’s junk, plain and simple.  And I just get so frustrated and discouraged even attempting to do any better when realizing I simply can’t.

I’ve taken art classes but my mind just refuses to absorb the knowledge.  It’s like a square peg in a round hole situation.  No matter how much I try to force myself to improve, it just can’t be done.  It’s like an endless cycle of trying but with no real sense of accomplishment.  Everyone always says practice is the key and that there’s no such thing as talent but I truly don’t believe it.  There are some artists on here whose age I simply cannot believe that draw amazingly well and not to discourage them but I can’t help but feel envious of that raw talent.  I simply don’t believe that whole ‘talent doesn’t exist’ thing that goes around every now and then.  It definitely exists and I simply don’t have it, no matter how hard I try.