i think i'll regret this.
PERCY TOZAKI / GENDER NEUTRAL MC
my attempt at making angst execpt im sick and gave up midway, plus im super tired ::3 note; this is my take on how the break up will go (not confirmed that percy will be the LI that breaks up)
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Percy loved you. How couldnât he? As much as he wouldnât admit it, you changed his life. You were perfect, his other half. The thing was that you were too perfect, so perfect he didnât even deserve to be next to you. It wasnât supposed to be this way, you were meant to just be someone he dated. Falling in love with you was never the plan. When the two of you officially started going out he felt like the heavens had sent an angel to love him. You were his dream come true, someone who genuinely loved him for himself. He couldâve been the same dork he was when he was younger and you couldâve loved him. Before Percy could realize he had fallen madly in love with you. The more he started to realize this the more he felt unworthy of you. He had to do something.
The bright light from his phone stared back at him showing an ungodly hour. As much as Percy twisted and turned in his bed he couldnât stay put. The more he was kept up by his thoughts the more he started to think, thinking alone in a dark room. His thoughts were killing him. He sat up on his bed looking into the darkness of his room. He had to distract himself somehow, grabbing his phone. The lock screen made his heart ache. As cheesy as it was, the picture he saved on his phone was a picture of you. The sight of you made his heart race just as much as it made his heart sink.
As he unlocked his phone and opened his messages he saw a message from you. He hesitated. He stared at the message you sent, shakingly clicking it. A goodnight message, wishing him sweet dreams. You ended the message with a heart and saying that you loved him. It was sent a few hours ago. Look at you, caring for him. He couldnât do it anymore. He loved you, he truly did. You were the part of his heart that made him feel happy. He loved you so much he knew you deserved better. He didnât deserve you. He didnât know what he was going to do with his life. You did, you were studying to become a lawyer for the sake of helping, he was studying to be a doctor because he was good at it. He was dragging you down. If he stayed with you he would just continue to keep dragging you down.Â
You were made for great things, but Percy Tozaki? What was he made for? A pretty face with a brain that was put to waste. Standing up he put on his shoes, not bothering to change from his nightwear. He needed to clear his mind. He had to before he went insane. Quietly he made his way out of his room, grabbing his house keys and his wallet as he entered the living room. He checked his phone before leaving the shared dorm.
The night was dark. There was a slight chill in the air but he didnât mind it. He barely registered that he was cold. His mind was so caught up with different things he had no time to focus on what he was feeling. He exited the building and started wandering around the campus. Percy knew better than to be out this late. His legs didnât stop though, nor did his thoughts. He stopped suddenly. His whole body had taken him to the place that changed everything. The place that in the light is seen crowded with people, but on nights like these it was empty, not a person to be seen. It was only Percy and his thoughts alone, back at the place he first met you, a pure coincidence that turned into something greater.
Sliding his phone out of his pocket he clicked on his messages. He stared blankly at his phone. Was he really going to do this? Yes, yes he was. You didnât deserve to put up with him. You werenât supposed to be someone special. He wasnât supposed to be this in love with you. He would just ruin your life if you stayed with him. Still he hesitated. How could he tell you everything he was thinking without sounding like a complete idiot? How does one send a text that would ruin everything he had wanted in life? He stared at the screen for a few more moments, recalling every moment he spent with you. He could feel his heart start to race as he grew closer to making his final decision. Without even realizing it his eyes began to slightly water. His movements were wary and slow as he started typing out his words. He decided to leave it short and simple. A quick message that hopefully wouldnât do much damage.Â
âi think we should break up. you didnât do anything wrong, i just donât think we should stay together anymore. itâs the best for the both of us.â
He wanted to put more, to say everything he had been feeling, but if he did youâd make him feel better again. Just like you always did, fixing any problem he had without even realizing how much of a burden he was, like loving him was the easiest thing. He stared at the screen harder, almost as if he was waiting for something to tell him not to do it, but even if the biggest sign was showing him not to. He couldnât turn back now, his tears started to overflow. From gathering in his eyes to rolling down on his cheek at an alarming rate. Was he making the right decision? Would you even care if the two of you broke up? Would you want this?
He didnât allow himself to even finish the thought, because he knew what the answer would be, no. He knows this because he knows you, because he loves you, which is why he needs to do this. To set you free, so with a quick gesture and a pang of regret without looking back he sent his text message. Once he did he made sure to power off his phone and put it away. The damage was done. Now he stood in the middle of the night standing where the two of you first interacted, regret started to sink in. There was no returning though, he just wanted what was best for you. The cold snapped him out of his thoughts. It was late he should return before anyone woke up.
It felt like a long walk. He'd drag his feet with every movement he made. It felt like he was carrying a burden of weight on his shoulders, a weight that seemed so familiar he almost welcomed it home. Once he finally made it back to his room everything seemed off, but he was so tired he hardly cared. He put his phone to charge and remembered what he had just done not even thirty minutes ago, leaving one of the best things that had happened to him in a long while. His body was shutting down though, heâd have to deal with the consequences once the morning sun came. But just before his eyes closed and he would drift into a slumber, he regretted what heâd done.
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wow that sucked, please dont beat me up into a pulp ::( srsly tho im so sick and i could barley write a full sentence, but im done yayay (its 3 am and im so tired)
