It’s been a few months now. Time flows slowly when you are drowning in misery. The ebb and flow are beyond your control. All you can do is try to keep your head above water and hope it quells. When you reemerge, most people take a personal hiatus. I understand now why, but this isn’t who I am. I couldn’t walk away from this opportunity.. because this is when I met her.
Her name is Karllie. Her smile is like that of none other, one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. Her eyes are vast beyond my scope of understanding, full of life and optimism. She shares my ridiculous sense of humor and lifestyle choices, a hard thing to find.
The first time I meet her is bliss. There was no nervousness, only a shared moment of laughter and fun. We talked all night, trying to crack one another up. We smoked together watching silly nothings on the TV, white noise. The only thing I could focus on was her. She is so beautiful, so funny.. so.. perfect. I had never so quickly fell for anyone.
I pursued this venture further. Again we got together, this time spending the entire day together. I introduced her to my world, assimilating her into my culture. She fit in so well, having a great time with my friends and acquaintances. We played games, got lunch, and put up the world’s worst Christmas tree. We laughed for hours.
Eventually we retreated back to my residence. It was there I truly fell for her. Holding her so close in my arms, sharing our secrets and aspirations. She tells me she is afraid of another breaking her heart. I empathize with her so much, knowing exactly what she means. I tell her I would never do this to her…. I am not a man who would ever cheat or hurt a girl. We talk for hours, sharing sweet moments and even sweeter kisses.
I am not ready for a relationship yet, this much I am sure of… but if I were to choose someone, it would be her. I will wait for you as long as it takes, Karllie. You are worth it.