#karachiconsulate

Second week went as fast as I could imagine, there were many highs and lows of the week. Let’s talk about the highs first. You know it, of course the 4th July celebrations was among my highs. I’ve not seen such amazing fireworks ever in my life, it felt like a dream, a fantasy, like I was in some intergalactic space. I am running out of words to describe that particular feelings. It was magical to me.

Among my highs one was before the fireworks when I sang along my Indian colleague their national anthem, I’ve always wished to sing that. I’m double checking my wishlst here.

When it comes to my lows this week, there’s not much to talk about except the fact that I still couldn’t get my laptop back.

Apart from that I would like to mention an insight I had this week about Americans. They’re very much aware of self accountability. When I see the Clean roads, the traffic rules and their generosity, it’s not because of any pressure or fear it’s because of their self accountability. Everyone is responsible for their part in the maintenance of the society. This is so much impressive.

That week I got rejected for the second time from an exchange program interview I was dead sure I would be selected, this was not the only failure of mine. Say that I had been through that before in many ways. I pretend that I’ve moved on but inner me gets poked everyday for my failures in life. I was shattered for a while, Why God? Why always me? Yet the other half of me (which is a little obtrusive) choose not to give up. Applying for SUSI was one thing I did soon after my last rejection. I wasn't sure this time though I got selected. The first week in susi18 as expected was not easy for me, started feeling lonely in a crowd thought I’d not be able to fit in. But thanks for the strategy of Susi making small subgroups for a shorter time, for we worked as a group and got to know each other and the blurry image started getting more clear. I felt more comfortable in starting a small talk with anyone.

I felt more confident each passing day as if my behaviour would be double checked and any uncertainties were explained. The environment here is what we’ve learnt in good moral stories in our childhood, like smiling at strangers, saying words of praise and appreciation when not really necessary. I mean this is just the beginning, by observing people around me, be it Pakistani participants or American mentors, I am looking forward to learning more and build a better version of me by the end of this programme.