#kano

There are two separate camps in film, both of which I have been a part of, celebrating greatness. I am immensely proud to report that "Mortal Kombat 2" firmly lands in both camps. Camp 1: 1. It passes the Bechdel Test. 2. It understands the material it is adapting, with a consistent tone and aesthetic down to a side-on match-up and ludicrous gibs. 3. The characters have parallel arcs in the form of Johnny Cage and Kitana, as well as matching, competent edits at the ending sequence. 4. It features themes of redemption and growth. 5. Hiroyuki Sanada is such an incredibly classy act that he delivers the line "I am Hanzo Hasashi. Hell bends to my will." With such power and gravitas that it actually works despite it being a "Mortal Kombat" line in his second fucking language. 6. Tadanobu Asano is such an incredibly classy act that he delivers the exchage: "You should be dead!" "You should be RUNNING!" with such power and gravitas that it actually works despite it being a "Mortal Kombat" line in his second fucking language. Camp 2: 1. Karl Urban teams up with a laser Australian to break into hell, where they must enlist Japanese Ghost Dad to steal an amulet, so that they may essentially turn off "Cheat Mode" for the villains; so that a non-sexualised lesbian may kill God.