#kabp

I believed in you. but you made me look like a fool.

I gave you my trust. but you lied to me.

I wanted to do something great. but you popped my balloons.

I wanted you to vote for me. but you rooted for someone else.

“Who I am is what I do to myself” Glenn says to himself.

  The sky is orange. The park is still noisy with vendors, women, and their children.

He sees the street vendor. He smiles at his customer as he says: “Enjoy your food!”

He sees the women. One says: “Oh really?” and then they burst into laughter.

He sees the children. They run after one another saying: “Tag! You’re it!” while smiling and laughing.

  He sits on a bench and observes his surroundings. A stranger with a golden amulet sits beside him and asks him if he’s okay.

  “Yeah” Glenn answers.

  “You sure? I know you’re not, I can tell” the man says with a smile on his face.

  “It’s just that I’m amazed at how easy these people can smile as compared to me” says Glenn. “I can make people laugh and I can make them smile. But I can’t do it to myself”

  “We smile simply because we can make other’s smile. Happiness can never be true if you don’t intend to make other’s genuinely happy” the man tells Glenn.

  “Do you do that?” Glenn asks.

  “It’s another thing when you want them to smile but you’re not sure if you can still make them” the man answers

  “Then how would you do it?”

  “Maybe I just need someone to make me smile, so that I can make other’s smile again.” The man responded. “Well, I have to go now. You must be really happy, huh?” the man smiles at Glenn for the last time and then walks away.

  Glenn bombards himself with questions.

  The job is not to make them laugh, but to make them happy. And by then, that’s when I can be happy.

  A guard approaches and says: “You are being summoned. Be ready in half an hour”

  Glenn puts on his gaudy clothes. Fills his face with make-up and puts his mask back on.

He presents himself to the one who has summoned him. Surprised. He stands before a man with a golden amulet.

This is getting old. So are we. A friend of mine once told me: “If he gave up on you, then you don’t need him. You deserve someone better who will put up with all your glitches, love you for them even.”

  We’ve been through a lot. We’ve teased each other so many times and that most of them led to either you or me losing temper. We’ve shared lots of laughs together. And most of all, so much tears have been shed whenever we get into quarrels. In all of our quarrels, we learn something and on the latter part, we reconcile. I can’t count the number of times we fought.  Although I can’t count them, I remember each one up to the smallest details because in each of them, I learn something.  And I always know that we have fights because you care for me and that you want to teach me something. I know that there are reasons behind your actions. I want to thank you for that.

  My friends always ask me: “How long can you stand this? When will you stop? What’s your limit?” And I always answer them with: “I don’t know. I’ll stop when I reach my limit. I just don’t know when that is. ‘Cause I know, that I still love him”. And now I think, I’ve reached my limit. We’ve been through a lot. And in all our fights, I don’t think I failed to reach out to settle the problem.  Correct me if I’m wrong.  Whenever I do, you shove me off. And honestly, I don’t think I want to feel something like that anymore. I don’t want to be in that kind of situation anymore. Because you don’t know how painful it is for me to be shoved off by someone like you. I don’t want to feel that kind of pain anymore.

  Bottom line, I don’t know if I still want to fix our problem. This is getting old. The way you teach me lessons, it’s getting old. I’m getting old. I learn. And one of the things I learned is that I can learn even if we don’t fight. Without having to hear such painful words from you. Without having to feel that you’ve grown distant from me. Without having a fight with you. And most of all, I can learn without having to experience pain.