Apr 11, 2017
When you gotta Yell
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When you gotta Yell
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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#ilike #todo #justwhatever #thewhole #daylong #tuesdayvibes
The new Legend of Zelda looks amazing! I can’t wait to get cold with Link.
Books. Books. Books.
If you're going to ask me what my earliest memory is, I would truthfully answer: My earliest memory is my dad teaching me how to read, or rather, forcing me to read.
I used to hate it - basing on that memory. However, at the times when I needed it, books were always there for me. When my dad had to work away from home, he would send me books to read. I guess that's how my fascination with reading started. Books have always made me feel better. Books were always a friend.
In high school where things weren't always nice for me, I found an escape with books.
In times where I really want to get out of a place, when I want to escape my own mind, books brought me to an adventure, somewhere far away.
Books made me fell in love. Books made me cry. Books made me stronger.
Books are more than material things, books are my anchor.
3 am
So... school year shall start again and so do i. New campus, new environment, new people. I also want it to be "new me". I've been out of myself this vacation. Like i did things i never imagined i would do. I don't have regrets anyway thou they're clearly out of the line. I smoked. I cursed people in my head and i think that's the heaviest coz i never gave these people i have cursed the chance to curse me back. Unfair. I'm so sorry. I just dont know what happened and im tired of putting apostrophes here hahaha. Btw, i feel excited and hoping that i would meet someone with the kind of eyes like what sungjae owns. Lol. Anything but different and unusual. Hahaha. Hes super cutey. Btw again, i will surely see this guy ive been stalking until this very time. Hahaha. Yez. I swear that a while ago will be the very last time. Haha. Im serious. So if our paths shall cross then they will. But thats all. Hes the one who forgets me first so i wont care from now on. He has flirted with someone else and i havent coz i thought hes the one but no. Ill start flirting from now on. Wait is that even right? Lol. I mean ill make sure that ill let someone better in. Someone unlike him whos a coward and insensitive and coward and coward. This year, ill get a boyfriend. My first boyfriend. Oh my god pls dont pity me for being a virgin since '97 hahaha. Like ive been waiting for someone who already given up on me so i dont have a choice but to get someone for myself. To make my SELF happy. Idk if its the measure of happi ess but i really wanna try this one. I want something new in my life. Anyway, ill be taking up ce for the rest of my life. Yes coz ill be a civil engineer. ya wait for that day. And there will be lots and lots of mathematics. Bigger combats. Yay. Hahaha. And god forbid, dont make this man say he likes me AGAIN. coz if that happens, ill just say "idgaf. No more."
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Why must I be like this? Is this my personality? Why am I the person that I am? I shut people out. I cause havoc in my own life and in that of others. I cause distress in every situation. I provide problems to everyone. Everything I do has a negative impact. I feel like I cannot do anything right, and, as a result, I become numb to others around me and I shut other people out. I know I should be doing the exact opposite, but I do not have the strength to portray my feelings out loud to the people I love. I am hurting them at the cost of my own selfishness and I feel there is nothing I can do about it because I am weak and undeserving of my own help. I need love and compassion, but I fear to demand it. I crave attention, but I fail to seek it. I desire knowledge and individuality, but I am simply another number on the mass of the planet, of no particular value or importance. I cannot escape the malevolent thoughts that torment my mind.Â
Life of a 17 year old chronic worrier.
I have had a tough few weeks. I've been pressured to hurry into life when unnecessary and made decisions that I shouldn't have had to worry about yet. I've fought for what I believed in and what I care about against people that should have been supporting any decision I made anyway!Â
Needless to say, it's been a little patchy. I have had slumps of depression every few days. Especially when I find i have nothing to do, nothing to keep me busy. Going through a psychologist just added to my stress, so that didn't work out. I sometimes feel like I can't breathe with all this weight I'm carrying on my shoulders.Â
Although I'm as anxious, stressed, and worried as I've ever been, I have also been happier than I've been in a very long time. The fact that I even had the guts to stand up to people that I was always so submissive to makes me feel so empowered. Like I can do anything. And that makes me happy. Most of all, I have someone that can bring me back after every fight with my mom, every disobedient band kid, and every time I feel  like the shittiest human being. It's the typical falling for your best friend and it could not get any better than this. We've waited too long.