“What more do you want?!” - (juststeve-please)
| rp starters: heated argument. | accepting | @juststeve-please |
“I want you to stop waiting for me to be someone I’m not!” Bucky shouted back, slamming his fist against the table and rattling everything on it. He was burning with rage and way past exploding, already unable to keep it in any more. He just couldn’t stand it. Couldn’t bear the always expectant, always hopeful look in Steve’s eyes as if one day he’d magically change into someone Steve was actually waiting for.
“I am not ‘your Bucky’ any more! Stop waiting for me to become the boy you used to know before the war because that’s never going to happen! I might remember some of it now, hell, maybe one day I will remember all of it but that doesn’t mean I can ever be that person again!”
It was driving him insane, being this constant disappointment, seeing how Steve’s face fell a little every time he did something else that he wanted him to, expected him to. And then of course Steve would try to mask it, would put on this understanding smile, as if it was just the matter of time and waiting before Bucky would be the Bucky Steve actually wanted.
“I’m not that guy any more and I never will be! The shit I’ve done, everything HYDRA did to me... It’s not going to disappear. A year ago I still didn’t know who the hell I was and now... I might be Bucky Barnes but I am not the same person and I’m done with seeing you wait for that guy to come back! I am done having you think about me as some middle-stage of your buddy’s return! I am who I am now and you either start dealing with it or fuck off”