#justpersonalstuff

I’ve managed to avoid thinking and ruminating over the past few weeks after J’s death. I threw myself into work, costuming, focusing on the show. I took tonight to sit down and have a breather and I have never felt so heavy. It’s like avoiding a hangover by drinking more. Except we all know that in the end, the hangover has to hit you and it’s much stronger and longer than it would have been if I just dealt with it sooner. This is my emotional hangover and I can barely keep it together.  And when I look for the people I need the most, People I thought were friends, people I love, people I could rely on. Even family. Even the person I married. They’re not there. And I feel so heavy and burdened and alone.  I just want to collapse underneath it all and let the weight crush me.  Personal blog is personal, but this is the only outlet I have right now. 

*opens creaky door* >Hellooooooo????< *enters the darkness* *stumbles over stuff laying around* *takes a tissue and wipes over her blog* *stirs up dust* *coughs and sneezes* >Hello from the outside At least I can say that I've tried to tell you I'm sorry for breaking your heart...<

Hey Ho! Long time, no talk... How’s everyone doing on here??? It’s finally weekend...and yeah I have to work as usual. Damn it. But at least the sun is shining and as we know, today is dormouse day which means if today there will be sun, we'll have that kind of weather for the next 7 weeks! *prayer circle for that*

Currently going through sad head type things. Hiding under blankets has been my comfort as of late, although it was good to get out and see people over the past 2 days. Still, trying to find some sort of a strong support network here has taken me much longer than anticipated.  That being said, I’ll keep going. Keep moving. I have no other choice, really. 

When people write Reviews for stories you posted almost 6 years ago and praise it like there's no tomorrow. Thank you for liking my old PoC FF.