#just floating

If I suddenly ceased to exist

Mere seconds ago

If I’m see-through and no one can hear me

Because I speak

And garner no response

I laugh

And it trails off when no one glances my way

I start telling a story

Only for them to walk away

And I wonder

If they know I’m even there

I wonder if I’m dead sometimes

A ghost, all on my own

I remember that’s not how it works

But maybe I am invisible

Not truly

But just to them

Then comes the acknowledgment

A gesture

A question

A reminder

That they know I’m there

So perhaps I’m not 

A figment of my own imagination

Perhaps I’m not

Dead

Gone

Invisible

But that gets me thinking

What if I’m their imagination?

What if everything I remember is wrong

And I’m just a part of their mind

Only acknowledged when they remember I exist

I feel invisible

Unseen

Lost in the crowd

Then suddenly I’m not

I don’t belong

Then I do

Like Schrödinger's Cat

Dead

And alive

At the same time

Yet I can’t stop feeling invisible

When they just walk by

And I say the same thing twice

Being ignored both times

Perhaps I’ll never know

Perhaps I truly will fade one day

And I’ll be invisible

For real

Until then

I shall keep wondering

“Okay. Heckyl,” Chase says, low and urgent. “You gotta hold it together. Just for a little longer, okay? Cos we’re gonna have to fight.”