#jethrobowl

Faux Oatmeal – Sunday, 5 January, 2020

Reboot 201. Which means the reboot of the reboot? Or… third time’s the charm?! Regardless, fingers crossed and ready to roll!

On January First, 2020… which was NOT the first day of a new decade, rather the first day of the tenth year of the decade which began on 1 January, 2011. Geez. Now that we’ve got that straight.

On January First, 2020 I set forth to begin a new year with healthy eating. I already had put my black-eyed peas in the crockpot to simmer all day before plunking in the already washed and chopped collard greens. We always “eat poor” on New Year’s Day so that my Southern Girl Soul and her family will “eat rich” for the remainder of the year. In retrospect, I should have gone with the cornbread mix rather than making it from scratch. I used whole wheat flour that was not as fresh as it should have been. It did not destroy the cornbread I baked in my cast iron skillet, but it did not enhance the flavor. I am not willing to give up my 12-inch cast iron skillet, but it makes so much cornbread, that even in our buttermilk and cornbread binging family, we are still eating leftover cornbread, five days later!

Now that my sidebar tangential meandering is complete: With the dinner already in the making, it was time for one of my favorite breakfasts: A Jethro Bowl of apples and oatmeal. I cheat. I use instant oatmeal packets so everything is contained in a single bowl of breakfasty goodness. I used to just put this concoction into a regular cereal or soup bowl. It was too much food for a single bowl, but I wasn’t willing to give up any of the ingredients. I don’t have time to eat it during the regular week; it takes a long time to eat that much food. I save it for the weekends. See below for my recipe.

I was at the stage where I add my instant oatmeal to my yummy apple concoction when I discovered that the only instant oatmeal was Darling Son’s maple and brown sugar variety. Yummy on its own; not so appealing with apples and cinnamon. What to do? I had already cooked my apple up with the chia seeds and sweetener. Rather than waste it, I thought I just needed to add some other healthy cereal to meet my breakfast preference of healthy grains. I dumped in a half cup each of Fiber One® and Cheerios®. It didn’t hit me until I went to wash the measuring cup that I had just added cereal to WATER. WATER! Vegans out there may think that is super cool. I drink soymilk and almond milk, but I remain a lacto-ovo vegetarian.  I gasped as I realized that my Peace Corps self was not able to let all this food go to waste. I ate it. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t good either. I snapped a picture before I ate the final bites:

When Darling Husband came into the kitchen he asked, “What is THAT?!” Yes, his emphasis of incredulity was in the original conversation. After I explained my oatmeal faux pas to him, he wanted to know why I still ate it. My simple, “I couldn’t waste it,” sufficed to abate his curiosity.

So, what’s my point? Well, we could go with good intentions gone awry… or Stupid Mistakes played to the end, even when we know they’re stupid… or Making the Best of a Bad Situation, a la making lemonade when life gives you lemons... Since I made my own lemon situation by adding dry cereal to water instead of milk, I needed to make it right. I did. I ate it. So, maybe my mantra might be Stupid Mistakes Made Right? I just need a catchy theme song such as the Horrible Histories’ Stupid Deaths!

Jethro Bowl of Apple Cinnamon Chia Oatmeal  

1 apple

1 T chia seeds

1 t cinnamon (or shake it out to your heart’s content and taste buds’ preference)

1 t equivalent preferred sweetener (less or more…YOUR taste!) (honey, agave nectar, brown sugar, Stevia, etc.)

Water to cover apple mixture

1 packet instant oatmeal, plain

Chop apple into bite-sized chunks. Add to bowl along with chia seeds, cinnamon, and sweetener. Add enough water to amply cover apple mixture. Heat in microwave, on high, for about two minutes. Stir. Return to microwave and heat on high for another two minutes. Repeat heating mixture until it boils. Times are approximate to your microwave and taste/texture preferences. Add instant oatmeal and mix thoroughly. Let sit a couple of minutes for oats and chia seeds to absorb water. May add boiling water to adjust consistency if needed. Eat it up!

 Works Alluded To:

Connelly, Steve (Creator) “Stupid Deaths” theme song on “Horrible Histories” 2009-2019. Uploaded to YouTube by mark1dart. 13 May 2017. Video. 5 Jan. 2020. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dES8ldFlFrA

Feller, Dick. “Makin’ the Best of a Bad Situation.”  1974. Uploaded to YouTube by Wayne Harvey. 8 Nov. 2014. Video of Audio. 5 Jan. 2020.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XH-bV6g3X8