picked my nephew up from summer care and he said he took this peach at lunch to give to me bc he knows i love them đĽşđ§Ą
this must be how jean felt
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picked my nephew up from summer care and he said he took this peach at lunch to give to me bc he knows i love them đĽşđ§Ą
this must be how jean felt

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GENUINELY what does shit kid even mean? What prompted Jean to come up with that? Itâs like deeply weird and we should not just blindly accept the term âshit kidâ bc itâs stupid and makes no sense. I like to think that Jean is constantly putting swears and insults together that make no sense to anyone but himself.
iâm slowly josing my janity
Chapter Forty-Four â Repertoire
âTheyâre all working for someone Dad knew before. Like, Seattle-before. Some woman that escaped Curdun Cay and gave him a hard time before disappearing.â âShe wants Conduits to be free,â I explained. âShe doesnât like whatâs happening right now and wants it to change, and sheâs sure itâs not gonna unlessâŚunless she starts making moves herself.â
8.6k words | 45-50 min read time | TRIGGER WARNINGS: Mentions of: death, kidnapping, hostage situations. Xenophobia mentions in anti-conduit terms (political climate also mentioned). Mild transphobia reference.
No one spoke after we left.Â
No one spoke. Not as we got on the highway and left Portland behind, not as we crossed the border into Washington. The most speaking anyone did was Zeke, who only did so to confirm Meiâs car was still following us whenever Dad asked, Dr. Sims at the helm of the Honda to âprotect the kids.âÂ
We followed the highway into the Evergreen state, only veering off at a familiar exitâBattle Ground State Lake State Park. Dad used to take us camping here during the summers, a lifetime ago, experiences that only existed in my memory as flashes of early morning fishing and trapping fireflies in plastic water bottles.Â
Dad was in the passengerâs seat, the unfolded dove in his unmoving hands. He didn't move at all, actually; he stared straight as a board and still as a statue in the front seat, staring down at the letter Celia had left behind.Â
Put your nose to the ground, Delsin. Sniff out the blood in the water, and come learn everything youâve missed.Â
The van eventually pulled in at the parking lot just by the lake, Zeke immediately throwing it into park as Dad got out without waiting to see if it was. He only paused long enough to open the rear doors for Brent and I to get out before making a beeline for Meiâs Honda, Dr. Sims barely able to get out of the driverâs seat before Dad was accosting him.Â
âWe need to get into this link,â he immediately said, holding up Celiaâs dove.Â
A trilling motor cried out and Aunt Sia burst through the trees, skidding to a stop on the gravel of the lake access lot. She pulled off her helmet, shaking her head to get her bangs out of her face. âI think weâre in the clear,â she said, dropping the kickstand and getting off the bike. âI didnât see anyone following you two at all.Â
Dr. Sims frowned. âThatâsâŚgood,â he said, sounding entirely unconvinced of the fact. âBut I canât guarantee they didnât get any live footage from the drone beforeâŚâ
Before Cat used her powers to destroy it.Â
Her powers.Â
Brent and I stood side-by-side as she rose from the backseat of the Accord way slower than Dom and Mei did, taking forever to work her way towards us as she avoided our curious stares. Cat was a Conduit. Cat was a Conduit.Â
How many times was I going to get hoodwinked like this?Â
Dad cursed, looking seconds away from trying to solve his issues through either drinking or violence. âOkay, letâsââ he sucked his teeth, trying to gather his thoughts. âLetâs just try to get online first. We need to find what Celia wants us to find.â
âDelsinââ Dr. Sims began, exhaustion in his voice.Â
Dad, though, immediately cut him off. âThereâs two kids in danger here, Eugene. Sheâs threatening my kids. âNew players enter the gameâ?â He motioned to Zekeâs van. âGrab your laptops.â
âI canât believe it,â Dom murmured under his breath as Dr. Sims relented, opening the back of Zekeâs van to retrieve his bags. Dom looked between Brent and I with wide eyes. âYour dad really is Delsin Rowe.â
âYeah, it was kinda the same when we found out, too,â Brent muttered as Mei slotted between us. Cat was still taking far too long to join our group, staring down at her feet and kicking rocks as she walked.Â
âDid you know?â I asked, glancing at Mei. She and CatâŚI wouldnât say they were closer, as we all were pretty closeâbut even in friend groups, you have favorites. And she and Cat were close, just like Reese and I were.Â
Apparently, though, not close enough. âNo, Iânone of us knew,â she insisted, Dom nodding vehemently in agreement. âShe never told me, at least.â
âYeah, well, I doubt thereâs no reason sheâs kept it a secret for this long,â Brent muttered, crossing his arms.
Cat finally crossed the threshold of being within earshotâand for that reason, none of us spoke. There was a long, possibly multi-minute pause where we all looked at Cat, and she refused to meet our eyes, looking at the grit on the ground instead.Â
Finally, I cracked first, asking a simple question: âHow long?â
Cat inhaled deeply Three years, she admitted, hands falling back to her sides in defeat.Â
âDoes Tommy know?â Dom immediately asked.Â
Catâs hands seemed to become lead at that.Â
Brent scoffed. ââCourse he doesnât,â he said, sardonic. âBecause you know your cousinâs the type to leave people for dead in alleyways and tell the world about it instead of not be a prick.â
âBrent,â I hissed. I get it, he was upset with Tommy and everything heâs doneâbut now wasnât the time to use Cat as the emotional punching bag for his issues with Tommy.Â
âHe is!â Brent said instead, glaring at me before turning his eyes back on Cat. âThatâs why you never told him, huh?â
Tommyâs been through a lotâ Cat began trying to defend, Brent speaking over her.Â
âPlease,â he scoffed. âHis parents dying to a Conduit doesnât excuse any of this shitâhim or your grandfather. You havenât told anyone because you know exactly what they wouldâve said if you told them you were a Conduit.â
You saw how my grandfather reacted when I told him I was a girl, Cat signed, scowling in offense. He barely accepted me then. Why would I tell him about this?
âWhy didnât you tell us about this?â Brent retorted in turn, swinging out an arm to motion towards me. âJean and I wouldnât have cared!âÂ
âBrent, thatâs enough,â I snapped. Brent clamped his mouth shut but stayed scowling; he hated being lied to, and this omittance countedâin his eyes, at least.Â
And while I knew Cat was entitled to keep her secrets her own, I felt a bit hurt that she kept this from us for three years. âWeâre not your grandfather,â I reminded her. âYou couldâve told us. We wouldâve kept it a secret from himââ
And Tommy? She asked, face deadpan. You think we would have been able to keep it secret from him?
I didnât have a good response to that. No, we wouldnât have; Tommy probably wouldâve found out very quickly, and wouldâve been pissed we kept it from him. But that wasnât my biggest concern with this whole situation. âYou shouldnât have been alone,â I murmured sympathetically.
Catâs expression wavered, and for the briefest moment, I saw everything she mustâve felt in those three years where she had to lie to us about who she was; the sadness and pain and grief of having to shove yet another part of herself into a closet out of fear of how people would react.Â
And I did the only thing I could think to do; I stepped forward and pulled her into a hug before she could try to protest.Â
Cat, admittedly, froze the moment I yanked her forward, and there were another two or three seconds where she didnât move at all. But then her arms came to wrap around my shoulders in turn, her cheek resting on my forehead as I felt the air escape from her lungs in exhale and her whole body relax in reliefâfinally, someone knew. Finally, she wasnât alone.Â
There was another hand on my back and soon Mei joined, the same girl group hug weâd do in the bathrooms or after a breakup. The close sisterhood, the love, the caring reminder that weâd all be there for each other.Â
Only there was a gap on my left where my best friend should have been.Â
We pulled back, Mei murmuring words of encouragement to Catâthough she didnât seem to be paying attention. At some point she must have felt the press of my castâs lattice on her because now she was looking down at my right arm like it was an enigma. Something strange and incorrectâand now that I knew she was a Conduit, and she knew I was, tooâI realized to her, it was. A broken bone on a Conduit was wrong in her eyes.Â
Which is why I avoided them when she looked up at me, instead pulling the sleeve of my jacket further over my arm.Â
Mei returned to Brentâs side and tucked herself in as Dom looked down at Cat, a ghost of a smile on his face. âSo what is your power, anyways?â He asked her.
Now that there was an alleviation to the tension here, Cat began to tell us all about her power: wax. She wasnât sure what kind, since it didnât exactly seem to be something like regular candle wax, but also didnât seem like tallow or something like beeswax. Itâs justâŚwax, she said with a simple shrug. Burns like it, smells like it, but I canât tell you how it becomesâŚdifferent after I drain something to use.Â
Brent, who seemed to let go of most of his upset now that he was being involved and informed, asked, âSo what, you can drain any wax?â
Cat nodded, adding for emphasis, Why do you think I own so much chapstick?Â
That also explained why I caught her eating the end of one in secret in the bathroom one time, though I wasnât going to mention it. I just thought she really liked cherry flavoring.
Mei looked up at Brent, whose face was beginning to turn pink from exposure to the elements. All those powers and he wasnât saved from his eczema. âAnd youâre steel?â She asked.Â
Brent seemed a bit proud of the fact when, instead of outright answering, his pink nose dipped lighter and lighter till becoming grey, the color spreading across his face and down his neck as he showed off his steel abilities.Â
Cat gasped in surprise as Dom said, âDude, thatâs fucking sick,â with a disbelieving laugh while Mei stood on her toes to reach up and touch a strand of his needle thin, cable-like hair in fascination. I just rolled my eyes. What a show-off.
Okay, thatâs way cooler than what I can do, Cat signed, nodding like she was impressed.Â
And then she looked at me, and asked the worst thing she possibly could. What can you do with your water powers?
Oh, nothing, bestie! I just get sicker if I use them too often. How the hell was I supposed to get out of this? Especially when Mei settled down on her boots to turn towards me, Dom crossing his arms and doing that lopsided, aloof grin.Â
âIââ I stumbled awkwardly. âI mean, nothing like Brentâs steel skin.â
Dom huffed out a chuckle. âYeah, but you can make a whole whirlpool in the ocean,â he pointed out. âSeriously, that thing was huge. Someone online said it was, like, five stories high.â
âAnd you did that tidal wave too,â Mei added, too cheerful for the damage that mentioned tsunami caused. I killed hundreds, I ruined Christmas, and she had her eyes alight like it was a sick party trick I pulled at her familyâs pool.Â
What else can you do? Cat asked, quickly adding, my powers become viscous but not liquidâIâve always wondered how liquid powers work!
âYeah, youâve got to show us something,â Mei agreed, Dom nodding in agreement behind her.Â
Oh, god, this could not be happening right now.Â
I felt the weight of their gaze, of their expectations; I shouldâve been able to show off my power with ease, it shouldâve been simple! I couldâve evaporated on the spot or swirled some water around my fingers and call it a day. But I wasnât even allowed to do thatâa fact that I definitely didnât wanna bring up now. Hey, guys, on top of Tommy and Reese being kidnapped, guess whoâs got a failing conduit organ?
I wasnât gonna say that
So instead I chuckled nervously, saying, âI donât know, guysâitâs late, those people could still be after us and we really donât need to be showing off right nowââÂ
âOh come on, Jean!â Mei interrupted, playfully stomping a foot. âI want to see what you can do! There has to be something simple.âÂ
âI reallyââ I struggled to find a new rung on the ladder of bullshit to climb up to try to get out of this. âIâm pretty low on my power, too, Iâd rather hold offââÂ
Dom looked at me like I was an idiot. âThereâs a lake behind you.â He deadpanned.Â
I glanced back at the lake. Right. Shit.Â
I looked at Brent, trying to use that twin telepathy people were so sure existed to scream at him get me the hell out of this! but he just stood there with a dumb, deer-in-headlights expression.Â
God, brothers are useless.Â
Mei was still looking at me in excitement, Dom raising a browâbut it was Catâs slightly suspicious glare that had me on edge, the stroma seeming to darken a bit like she was looking for a twitch in my facade. Not that she needed one; the proof of my hesitance lay in the arms I crossed, the cast pressing against my chest as a nice, firm reminder of why exactly they were all eyeing me in the silence.Â
I was in the middle of debating telling them the truth or doing a little party trick when Dad gave me the grace of a distraction in the noise of a long, drawn out slew of curse words as he hit the hood of Zekeâs van.Â
Dad, Dr. Sims, Zeke and Aunt Sia were perched around the hood, watching Dr. Sims as he switched between two of his laptops like a frantic animal trying to find an outâor, in this case, a way in. Into whatever little hole Celia had carved out to lead us toâŚwell, hopefully Reese and Tommy, though at this rate I wasnât sure what to believe.Â
âYour dad really is Delsin Rowe,â Dom repeated his statement from earlier, awe and something akin to distrust in his expression, like he was waiting for Brent and I to yell sike and say this was all a ruse. Neither of us did. âAnd thatâsâthatâs Eugene Sims. And you said the other guy was Cole MacGrathâs friend?â
I sighed, just thankful the attention wasnât on me anymore. âYeah, thatâs Zeke Dunbar,â I said. âHe was there when Cole got his powers and all that stuff in Empire City. And Aunt Sia was apparently Dr. Simsâ friend in high school.â
Cat hummed some disbelieving sound. Wow, so youâre connected to everyone from the Seattle Uprisings in some way, she said, looking at me. That must be crazy.
Brent scoffed. âUnderstatement of the fucking century,â he muttered.Â
Mei kept her eyes on Dad, squinting in analysis like she was dissecting him under a microscope. âWho were those people who came to the school?â She asked, finally peeling her eyes from Dad to look between us.Â
Brent and I glanced at each other, silently debating whether we should even tell them anythingâwould it be okay to? Would it be safe to? He raised a brow and I shruggedâthey were already involved in some way. It was too late to keep them out of the bullshit that followed our family name.Â
Brent gave the smallest nod before looking down at his girlfriendâGod, that was still weird to think about, looking at them two so close and not standing on other sides of the group and making googoo eyes at each otherâand beginning to explain. âTheyâre all working for someone Dad knew before. Like, Seattle-before. Some woman that escaped Curdun Cay and gave him a hard time before disappearing.â
âShe wants Conduits to be free,â I explained. I had been in her mind, felt that hunger. Her betrayal at the mere idea of letting go of her own freedoms, her powers, to have a chance at Conduits being accepted into society was enough to make her betray Augustine, someone I could feel she had the same love I felt when I was with Dad. âShe doesnât like whatâs happening right now and wants it to change, and sheâs sure itâs not gonna unlessâŚunless she starts making moves herself.â
If she followed her convictions enough to do that, she was dangerous.Â
Dom huffed. âBut Conduits are free,â he said, rolling his eyes like it was stupid simple. Like it was obvious.Â
He became very sheepish when Brent, Cat and I all turned in place to look at him like he was an idiot.Â
âSeriously, dude?â Brent asked, almost offended that heâd even say anything like that.
âWhat?â He asked, throwing up a hand when he saw how we all were looking at him. âItâs true! Conduits havenât had to be in Curdun for years now.âÂ
âYeah, okay, and there were a hundred years between the slavery being abolished and the Civil Rights act,â Brent pointed out, something Dom scowled atâespecially as a Black man.Â
âWhat Brent is saying,â I interrupted before Brentâs deadpanned matter-of-factism could end with a foot in his mouth and a fist in his face. âIs thatâŚwell, yeah, weâre out here, but things arenât exactly going well, you know? Theyâre trying to force Conduits to sign up in registries and everything.â
Thereâs a dude running for president this year whoâs whole campaign is that we should be locked up like before, Cat added.Â
âOr shipped off,â Brent added, crossing his arms. He was all skin once more, but the ends of his hair were going grey the more he thought about it, revealed by his lack of beanie. âSeriously, who the hell thinks bringing segregation back is going to do anything?â
âI donât know if I would call it segregation when theyâre trying to make camps like the ones my hii-oji was sent to when he was a child,â Mei corrected. âTheyâre talking about that 990-something executive order. Thatâs internment camps.â
âNot to mention the states thatâre requiring ID for Conduits,â Brent added in agreement, looking down at Mei. âTheyâre trying to make that a federal law. All itâs missing is an arm baââ
âAlright, I get it, damn,â Dom said, holding up his hands in mock surrender. âI knew things were bad butâI mean, I never really thought that would happen,â He defended. âItâit all sounds so ridiculous that I never thought theyâd actually do it, you know?â
I rubbed my own arm; that was fair, I suppose, if this was something that was simply rumor. But there was one issue. âItâs already happening,â I pointed out. Dom was about twenty years too late on hoping it was too insane.Â
Because it happened once already.Â
Our conversation didnât get to continue; Dad exclaimed, âOh thank God,â as he immediately commandeered one of Dr. Simsâ computers from him, scrolling. Zeke disappeared into the driver's side of his van and came out with a yellow notepad and a pen, nodding along as Dad narrated something for him to jot down. They all looked serious, but more so now; instead of being confronted by the puzzle that was getting in, now they were debating some sort of solution to whatever was presenting itself.Â
âThat seems good,â Brent hummed, looking at me. âThink they finally got an answer?â
âThat, or at least something to start with,â I agreed.Â
Cat glanced at the group, eyes hovering on Dad before she offhandedly signed, So what happens now?Â
I cocked my head to the side. âWhat do you mean?âÂ
This, she replied vaguely. This random group that stole Tommy and Theresa, the demands they had for your dad. What happens now?
I hesitated. What did happen now that we were here? Dad seemed fully intent on saving them, and that meant hunting down Celia. Not to mention he looked like he needed no motivation to do that when I told him of the fleeting visions I had of Celia there for every moment. At Momâs labor, at the marina, there answering a message about me in the back of a van. Regardless of what was going to happen here, he was going to hunt Celia downâTommy and Reese were just secondary objectives to the real goal.Â
âIâŚguess we try to find where these people took Reese and Tommy,â I said, looking at Cat. âThe person Dadâs trying to find leaves behind clues, makes this sort ofâŚa scavenger hunt for him. Heâs gotta follow the pieces.â
âSorryâshe kidnapped Theresa and Tommy and is making your dad play hide and seek?â Mei asked, holding up a hand. That same hand tossed up in disbelief. âWho the hell does something like that?â
A monster.Â
I watched Dad throw his head back and groan aloud, exhausted from whatever search Celia had him on. Truthfully, we all were tired; I donât think I got much sleep in the back of the vanâat least not anything substantialâand I doubted Dad even slept at all. âSheâs using them to get to Dad,â I said, finally answering Mei. âItâs not about finding them, itâs about using them to lead him to her.â I looked between my friends. âAnd showing him something along the way. Whatever she has to show him is more important thanâthan the safety of a bunch of kids in school or anything.âÂ
Cat frowned. Thatâs insane, she said. Her power could have fried any one of us if she wanted.
Her power?Â
Celiaâs power wasâŚwell, it was paper, which, while it apparently was enough to kill someone by a thousand paper cuts, wasnât something that could fry someone. Not by a long shot.Â
I didnât get to ask the question, though; instead, off to the side, Aunt Sia asked, âDid you say fried?â
Everyone turned to look at Aunt Siaâshe had somehow approached us without a single one realizing in spite of the gravel at our feet that crunched with the slightest shift in posture. I hadnât realized she was so light on her feetâor maybe thatâs a talent sheâs kept to herself from her days in Project Sanctuary.
Regardless, she glanced between us all, eyes especially hovering on Dom, Cat and Mei as she said, âI need you all to tell me everything you can about the attack on the school.â
My brow rose. âIs everything okay?â
Aunt Sia weighed her responses in her mind, head tilting back and forth until she found her answer. âSort of. We need to pinpoint something and I just want to make sure all of our bases are covered, so weâre not missing something crucial.â She crossed her arms. âSo I need you three to tell me everything you remember.â
Dom went first.Â
Period change between second and third had just happened, and he was still drying off from the showers when he heard screaming in the lockers after gym. Some people from the halls had managed to book it down to the Phys Ed wing and tuck awayâhe had barely left before he turned back around and hid in the supply closet in the gym with a bunch of other students, herding them in before bracing against the door to make sure it couldnât swing in.Â
Mei seemed more shaken than I originally thought as she started her account; her eyes immediately went downward when Aunt Sia looked at her, and she began to fidget with the bottom hem of her jacket as she recounted how she hid away in the library. She didnât have much of a plan, she said; she was going to listen out for the attacker and pray she could outmaneuver them by hiding at the ends of the bookshelves. She stumbled through her retelling so much that Brent had to throw an arm around her in support.Â
âYou were in the library?â I asked. âI thought third period was your Econ class.â
Mei swallowed back whatever bile the thought had brought up. âI, yeahâit is. I was sent to get copies before class started and left to grab a book while Ms. Adler did that for me.â
Aunt Sia kept her steely analytical eyes on Mei for a moment before hummingâsomething Mei said registered in her mind, though she didnât say anything aloud.Â
Cat, though, had it the worst, as she was there the moment they took Tommy.Â
We hid in the stairwell, she told us. We didnât see when they came in but we heard itâthey were loud, and there was a lot of banging. Tommy, heâyou know he knows what that sounds like, she said, looking between Brent and I so we could vouch for her. He knew it wasnât guns, but wasnât sure what it was, so we hid until we could make sense of what was happening.Â
Aunt Sia nodded. âSmart,â she murmured. I couldnât help but agreeâTommy hiding them but keeping them where they could hear what was happening couldâve been the difference between life and death.Â
Something he mustâve carried within himself from last time.
We were hiding, waiting to see if we needed to go into the science wing or run downstairs, when we heard the woman tell the others to look for him, she said, eyes faraway. Another person that mattered to me, another haunted look. I kept telling him we needed to go, we needed to hide, but he wouldnât move. At first I was worried he was frozen, you know, because of his PTSDâbut after a moment when we heard moreâmore crashes and screaming, he stood and told me to go hide.Â
Brent blinked. âHe gave himself up?â He asked incredulously.Â
Cat nodded. He did, she said. I tried to stop him, tried to tell him that it was dangerous, but he said he didnât want anything worse to happen because of him. Cat looked down at the gravel, shoulders sagging with the weight of what happenedâand the subsequent choices she made. I didnâtâŚI watched him go down the stairs, and a few seconds later, heard him call out to the people. He told them his name, and said that he was there, so they could leave. He was demanding they leave. I didnât know they already had Theresa until I heard him say her name and ask them to not hurt her. Thatâs when I finally moved to peek over the third floor breezeway and watched them be dragged away. She chewed on her inner cheek, eyes brimming with tears in the pale moonlight. I just watched them get carried away and IâŚI froze. I did nothing. I should have done something.
My heart broke, the shatter making me take a step forward. âKitty, no, you couldnât have doneââ
I should have done something, she insisted with a huff through her nose, the movements of her signing firm enough to enunciate even through the language barrier. I have powers, I could have done something! Instead I froze and let those assholes take my cousin, she threw a hand up in punctuation.Â
Brent started to speak, âCat, you did what was bestââ before he was interrupted by Aunt Sia.Â
âItâs traumatizing, watching someone you care about get taken away like that,â she said empathetically, taking a step forward. âYou sort ofâŚspiral, and begin to think about things that couldâve been different. You couldâve said something different, or insisted hard enough, or if you had just convinced them to go somewhere that, in hindsight, wouldâve been the perfect hiding spotââ
She cut off, throwing a glance back over her shoulder, eyes hovering on her best friend, Dr. Sims. All this chaos, and I forgot she knew Dr. Sims before he even developed powers; was she there the day he did? Was she there the day he was taken?Â
She righted her eyes once more, a hand going over her leather-wrapped heart. âI get it, okay? And I need you to understand there is nothing you could have done to change this. Realistically, the people that attacked your school would have kept attacking, if they stayed. They wouldâve kept searching for him, andâwell, thereâs a chance your cousin saved lives by giving himself up, including yours. Definitely yours, if you had made your power known at all. We still donât know a lot about Archangel, but we know enough about its leader to know it wouldâve ended badly for you if you intervened.
âAnd weâre not going to stop until we find him, okay? Thatâs why I need you to tell me everything that happened.â She lowered her hand from her heart, letting Cat take a moment to calm herself before asking, âWhat happened after you raised yourself enough to see them taking your friends?â
Cat inhaled deeply before raising her hands. I didnât actually move until I heard the woman yell about leaving, that they had âtheir targets.â They dragged Tommy and Theresa through the front gate. The woman who was telling everyone what to do was on the second story breezeway across from meâ
Aunt Sia immediately straightened at that. âYou saw the woman?â She asked. âCan you tell me more about her?â This was different; seeing someone use a power was one thing, sure, but the woman who outright threatened Dad with that message on the courtyard being seen? Maybe we could use that. We could confirm it was Celia.Â
She was blonde, Cat said. Had a hat on, one of thoseâŚ.I can only describe it as French? What are those calledâ
âBeret?â Mei asked.Â
Cat nodded. Yeah, kind of like those. More slouchy. She had a brown coat, a long one, scarf around her neck. The weird thing though was that she was hard to look at. Like, she was surrounded by this light that was way too bright.
I looked at Aunt Sia, who was already looking at me like she was waiting for confirmation from someone else, someone that knewâŚâThatâs not Celia,â I said.
She nodded in thought, hand absentmindedly fiddling with her braid. âItâs not,â she agreed.Â
Brent sighed hard. âSo thereâs more than just the crazy suicidal lady,â he said, pinching the bridge of his nose.Â
Domâs eyes widenedâfor someone who was usually aloof, he was quick to figure things out when he was paying attention. âWait, soâthe person you all were sure had something to do with this, that womanâs not her?â
Aunt Sia held up a placating hand. âWe know sheâs still involved,â she reassured himâespecially when his words seemed to make Catâs hackles raise in alarm. âSheâs the cause of this in some capacity. More than likely, she sent someone trusted to kidnap your friends.â
Okay, but who? Cat demanded. If you guys donât know who took my cousin, then how are you even supposed to find him? Or Theresa?
Aunt Sia watched Catâs hands for a moment, that hand on her own braid paused as I watched her eyes seemingly flash in the moonlight as the thoughts behind them ran like pistons, trying to connect dots.Â
Which is why it was no surprise when Aunt Sia, instead of continuing to calm everyone down, asked, âWhat else happened?âÂ
Cat blinked, looking at Aunt Sia like she hadnât heard her correctly at firstâbut something settled in the fugue of her panic and she exhaled shakily, raising her hands once more. She wasâI told you she was on the second balcony, right? She asked, everyone nodding in confirmation. Okay. She was there, and that weird light around her flashed and she disappeared. I didnât realize she was on the rooftop until there was a huge light ray that was carving that message into the courtyard.
Mei was the first to voice it. âShe teleported?â She asked, looking up at Brent. âConduits can teleport?âÂ
âNot usually. Not unless their power allows it.â Aunt Sia answered instead.Â
Cat, though, shook her head. I wouldnât say she teleported. Well, she sorta did, but it wasnât just her disappearing. It was the bright lightâlike you said, her power. She had someone standing beside her on the rooftop, a man, and once she was done with the message, instead of disappearing, there was this weirdâŚÂ
Cat struggled to find the word, instead taking a moment to broaden in a wide circle with her hands before going back to signing. This huge circle was behind her. Blue. It appeared behind them when they were talking and then they turned and walked into it and disappeared.Â
Blue circle.Â
My eyes traveled away from the group, looking out at the gray lake in the pale moonlight, and suddenly I was there, back in the Puget Sound watching something on the other end of the waters widen further and further until those soldiers came out of it, ice at their fingertips. The same person that attacked the school, took Tommy and Theresa, was the same person who helped Augustine and those soldiers attack the Akomish reservation.Â
Attacked me.Â
Nearly killed me.Â
I had really only used it once, but I became very used to the idea that I could breathe underwater. Especially after the first time I used the ability, when everything seemed so peaceful and bright and exciting. But now? I was reminded of what it felt like to drown. Between the numbers and the abilities, I felt like we were all in over our heads. Because if they could kidnap me, Tommy and Reese, if they could bomb COLE, if they could nearly kill meâŚ.
What else could they do?
Aunt Siaâs voice brought me back to the current conversation, asking, âDid you happen to hear any of their conversation before she disappeared? Anything about a location, or somewhere to fall back to?â Cat shook her head, and Aunt Sia tried her best to not seem disappointed. âThank you for telling me all of this,â she said instead with that gently placating sincerity in her tone that always brought a bit of calm to you when you were upset, like a motherâs gentle hum. She smiled, though the action seemed a bit stressed, and then turned to leave, heading back towards the others by the van.Â
We watched her leave in silence, everyone paused with bated breath like they were scared to be the first to break itâthough mine wasnât out of fear. I waited until Aunt Sia was far out of hearing range before turning to look at Cat. âThe portalâdid it look like those solar flares that come off of the sun?â I asked. âSorta wispy, a bit purple at the edges?â
She blinked, surprised I even knew that, before nodding. It did. How do youâ
I turned before she even finished the question to head towards Dad.Â
I held up a hand, signaling for them to just wait a minute when Brent asked me what the hell I was doing as I was two steps behind Aunt Sia. Zeke was looking down at the long list on his notepad as Dr. Sims was trying to calm Dad down, a placating hand out.Â
Not that it was doing much. I caught the tail end of Dadâs rant the closer we approached: ââimpossible to figure this out without it taking days,â he insisted, hand running through his hair. That same hand motioned off both abruptly and vaguely as he added, âThose kids donât have that sort of time!â
âTheyâve put up a ton of firewalls and heuristic scans,â Dr. Sims told Dad. âI can try to use a recursive backdoor exploit, but Iâd have to map out the subnet first. Itâll take some timeââ
âWe donât have time,â Dad stressed again, a bit more forceful.Â
Aunt Sia finally joined the group, starting with, âI donât think anything they told me will helpââ before a particular patch of gravel crunched under my feet and they all paused to look up and see who was approachingâsomething Dad especially didnât seem to want to deal as he sighed, trying to keep his tone level to keep me from worrying, like he always did. And always failed to. âJean, goâgo hang out with your friends for a while while we figure this outââ
âThe person that attacked the school helped attack Salmon Bay,â I said, getting straight to the point. âAnd I donât think itâs Celia.â
That at least got his attention.Â
Aunt Sia told the men what Cat had explained to her, and I waited till the end of the conversation to add that those portals were near-exactly like what I saw when I was fighting Augustine in the Puget Sound. By the time I was done, Zeke was nodding slowly while Dad stared off at the paint of the van, Dr. Sims too busy typing to really commit to a look of thoughtfulness.Â
âSo that confirms it,â Zeke said, looking at Dad. âCeliaâs got a second-in-command.â
Dad hummedâor, it sounded more like a badly disguised groanâwhile he chewed on his inner cheek. âOne thatâs doing the dirty work while she works behind the scenes,â he huffed. âGlad to see not much has changed.â
âWhoever it is, Celia trusts,â Aunt Sia said.Â
âAnd thatâs hard to come by,â Dr. Sims added. âIâll look into finding local footage, see if we can get a start on figuring out who this person is.â He was typing like a madman on his computer, not even pausing in the strikes as he looked up at Aunt Sia. âBut we donât know where they could have gone?â
Aunt Sia shook her head. âNo,â she confirmed. âThe tall one, DâŚ.Don?â She asked, looking at me.Â
âDom,â I told her. I tacked on uselessly, âShort for Dominic.â
âDomâhe was in the lockers,â she told Dad. âBrentâs girlfriend says she was in the library, and while Tommyâs cousin could see him being taken away, she didnât hear anything thatâd help us.â
Dad groaned. âSo weâre no closer to finding out which one of these places they could be.â
I cocked my head. âWhat do you mean?â
There was this brief moment where Dad looked at me, opened his mouth, and I could practically see the insistence that I not worry about it on the edge of his chapped lipsâbut then he froze. He paused, snapped his mouth shut, and after a beat, the insistence floated away on the frosted air of his exhale. âWeâre having trouble finding where your friends are,â he admitted.Â
The chill that ran down my spine had nothing to do with the winter air. âWhat? What do you mean?â
âI mean,â he said, moving to lean against the grill of the van, âThat I think Celia had this all planned to where I was supposed to use the mobile command center, to directly access their records. But since your friend triggered the alarms, it shut everything down.â
My chest felt like lead. âSo youâŚyou have no idea where they are?â
Zeke held up a hand. âWeâve got some ideas,â he reassured me, motioning towards the hood of the van where the dove lay unfolded and on its front, revealing the letter Celia wrote Dad. âWe figured the crazy lady is using some sort of old DUP facility based on the letter, and Eugene managed to use the old DUP stuff he had to pinpoint a secret file of locations. But itâs not exactly a short list,â he said, flipping his hand to show me the other side of the pad.Â
Oh, that wasâŚ.a lot of locations.Â
âLocationsâ was a loose term. Some were obviousâCurdun Cay, stations in other cities. The big major holding cell on the East Coast that was destroyed a while ago in a hurricane. But there were a lot of other things, words and phrases and even simple acronyms that just didnât make sense, things only those thatâve worked with the DUP in the past wouldâve even had a chance at cracking. Lowcountry. ABDA. Newbrant, Chilling, JST, Purcell, Faâ
Purcell.Â
Zeke kept talking, but it didnât really register to my ears; that one word seemed to peel off of the pad and float in my vision, the word repeated again and again in my head but not my tone of voice. No, the voice was more authoritative, cooler and firmer like the concrete she had wielded.Â
âWhich is why Iâm giving approval for the detainee to be sent to our research facility in Purcell. If we can find a way to harness that ability? The DUP would never fall.â
ââtrying our best to find themââ Dad said when I came back to earth, taking my silence for fear and rushing to reassure me. Instead, I interrupted him.Â
âItâs Purcell.â
Dad faltered as everyone else raised their heads to look at me, confusion on their faces. âWhat?â
I tried to keep up with my thoughts and outline them in a way that would make sense, despite how insane it all seemedâbut I told Dad the story once and I assumed he told the others, considering they were still here. âIâwhen Garrett was showing me things, the memories they had of what Celia had shown themâthere was the moment Celia defected. Augustine was telling her about thisâthis Conduit that she found that could ânegateâ another Conduitâs powers if he was near them. She sent the Conduit to this place called Purcell to find a power to go with his ability so that she could use it to turn off Conduits so they could âreenterâ society. Itâs why Celia left her, Dad.â I told him, watching his eyes widen with every word. All I told him, and somehow I missed telling him all this to instead inform him about what Celia did to Mom. âThey wanted to give this Conduit a physical power to make the implants like Garrett had actually work, so Conduits didnât have powers and could live in society. And Celia didnât like that, so she left Augustine alone when you fought her in the Sea6News tower.â
Zeke slowly lowered the notepad as I rambled on, glancing to meet Dadâs eyes when I paused. âIf Dr. Hutch was correct and the signatures on Garrett and Jean matchedââ He began.
âThat means they found a compatible power,â Dad finished in agreement. âProbably sped everything up that they could while we were all on trial, threw the implant in Garrett as a minimum, and Celia managed to recruit them after the DUP lost all funding a year later.â He spun around, zeroing in on Dr. Sims. âDo you know if they found this Purcell place like the others?âÂ
âI can look,â Dr. Sims acquiesced, moving to the passengerâs side door of the van to grab another one of his laptops. He booted it up, moving to go through the plethora of fileâs he had stored on it and began working away.Â
Meanwhile, Dad had gone digging for his phone in his pocket as Aunt Sia moved to give Dr. Sims room to work, settling in beside Dad and putting a hand on his arm. âDo you want me to go get a description of the man with Celiaâs lieutenant? He might be the tar Conduit,â she said, keeping her voice low.Â
Dad nodded absentmindedly, only glancing up to watch her leave before beginning to type away at his phone. Dr. Sims shifted to another computer and we all fell into silence for a bit as he worked until he said, âIâm not pulling up anything with the Purcell moniker. Maybe it went by another name? But we donât even know what Purcell means.â
Zeke was scribbling on the notepad in his hands now, frowning. âPurcell,â he hummed, like he was testing out the word. âAinât that some sort of mountain?â
âItâs either a mountain range, or a composer,â Dad quipped, scrolling past the latter to click on a wikipedia link for the former. ââThe Purcell Mountains are a mountain range in southeastern British Columbia.ââ He read off of the screen before looking up. âHow the hell are we supposed to get to British Columbia?âÂ
âAssuming it has anything to do with the area,â Dr. Sims added offhandedly.Â
âI might still have some contacts,â Aunt Sia returned, moving to stand beside Dr. Sims. She motioned for the note pad Zeke had and flipped to the next page, beginning to make her own notes. âI had a lot of different ways of getting Conduits into Canadaâthere has to be something I can still do.â She jotted down something before holding it out for Dad to take. âThis is what Jeanâs friend remembers of the lieutenant and the man with her.â
She silently held out her other hand and the two traded, Dad reading her notes as she began to search for a way into Canada via Maps instead. âBlondeâŚshort build with a skirtâŚman with brown buzzed hair,â he huffed, looking up at Aunt Sia with a raised brow. âThe woman was âsurrounded by light?ââ
Aunt Sia shrugged. âThatâs what she said,â she defended. âThat she seemed to be surrounded by some kind of shifting light source.â
Dad seemed to watch Siaâs face for a lie before sighing hard, holding the notepad out for Zeke to take back. âI donât know these people,â he said. âThey donât ring a bell at least.â
Dr. Sims sighed. âI donât have a lead on this Purcell place,â he said. âWhich, on one hand, means the lab was never found and is probably where Celia is stationed. But we donât have a direct location. If we continue with the assumption that âPurcellâ means this mountain range, itâs still a mountain range. Thatâs a wide area to search. If we make it up to Canada, I can deploy some angels, try to zero in on it based on activityâespecially any kind of radio wavesâbut Iâd need time to pinpointââ
Dad groaned, letting his head fall back. âWe donât have time to search a whole mountain range. Those kids donât have time.â
I tried to swallow but my mouth was too dry; there it was again. Dadâs urgent insistence that we were running out of time, that Tommy and Reese were running out of time. They were in danger, that much I knew, but Dad was so sure that something horrible was going to happen. That spark of anxiety behind his eyes?
He was scared of them dying.Â
And that terrified me, because I knew the idea wasnât above the realm of possibilities where Celia was involved.Â
I glanced back at my friends, the ones from my group remaining; Cat had cracked under her own worry and began to pace, Dom and Mei watching her footsteps with concern. Brentâs eyes met mine and he just barely raised his brows, asking for an answer I didnât have. Was this what it felt like, to be Dad? To see all the people you cared about stressed and have no way to fix it? No answers, no ideas. No location to a place my best friend was dragged to and no idea if we could even get there. Sure, we had an idea, a concept of a possibility of an answer. A mountain range that, in the conversation Dad, Dr. Sims and Zeke were currently having, was 300 miles wide and nearly triple that in height. It would take forever to search the area, far longer than we had to spare. This wasnât something we could solve with an address and Google Mapsâhell, I couldnât even do what Mei did and stalk a bitmoji on the prayer that Iâd even be able to find herâ
Wait.Â
Wait.Â
My eyes widened and I broke away from Brentâs stare to fumble in my pocket for my phone, managing to drop it in the process. The crunch from my phone hitting gravel grabbed everyoneâs attention and I suddenly felt a dozen eyes on me as Dad asked, âYou alright?â
I didnât respond, not yet; there was some terrible part of me that was terrified that this wouldnât work. That somehow the time away had taken away from the life I knew had taken this too. Not to mention my last phone took a swim in the Sound.Â
But for once in my goddamn life, I was lucky; I signed into my phoneâs account that turned it from a burner into mine, and with it came the influx of everything else that belonged to me. The missed calls, the plethora of voicemails. The previews to emails with accusations that felt like they stabbed me in my chest even as I swiped them away.Â
None of that mattered right now. Not when I could possibly help.
The gravel shifted beside me as Dad walked over to join me as I clicked through apps and opened the one I was looking for, cursing at how long it took to load in this area with terrible reception. I smacked the screen of the phone and it prompted Dad to ask again, âJean, what are you doing?â
But just then, the location map of the Find My Phone app loaded, and oh, how I couldâve cried; every desperate search for my missing phone, every joking message Iâd send to her when she was off doing something far from home, all led to a circular dot I centered in the screen, Reeseâs last location pinged somewhere in Canada.Â
I held up my phone, screen facing outward. âWould you be able to figure out where she is with this?â I asked Dr. Sims.Â
He cocked his head. âWhat is that?â
Dad stepped forward, motioning for me to hand my phone over as he huffedâdespite the stress of it all, he almost seemed amused. âFind My Phone, saving the day again,â he murmured as he turned around, walking to Dr. Simsâ side. âLast online yesterday. Whatâs the likelihood that that was her phone dying?âÂ
Dr. Sims took my phone, holding it in one hand as his other reached out to the map on his mini-computer and using the touch screen to zoom in. âIt looks like itâs here,â he said, motioning to the screen. âEyebrow Peak, or around that area.â
Dad sighed. âSo weâre definitely going to Canada,â he said, rubbing the overgrown stubble that had turned scruff on his jawline. âAlessiaââ
âAlready on it,â she said, motioning for Zeke to follow her. âMind helping?â
âSure,â Zeke said, pushing off of the side of his van. âThink Iâve got some old favors I could try calling in.â
They left as Dr. Sims muttered something to Dad, who nodded before turning to face me. âWeâll give you your phone back when we get what we need off of it, okay?â He asked me.Â
He looked so tired; I hadnât realized his eyebags had gotten so dark until they were illuminated by the moonlight, nearly black, and with his unkempt beard and hair that had turned tangled with how many times heâs run his hands through itâŚhe just looked haggard.Â
I recognized the dismissal. His statement had an unsaid ending, go somewhere until weâre done, an expectation to let them do what they needed to do. But between the way his shoulders sagged and the tension in my own, I couldnât do it. Not yet. Instead I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around him in a much-needed hug.Â
He frozeâfor someone who looked so run down, his lower back sure was stiffâbut then his arm came around to hold me, hand rubbing across that spot in my back that was now becoming sore to the touch. There was a softness to the movement and the way he subsequently melted, like he too needed this small moment.
And for a blissful two minutes, we were given a reprieve.Â
At least until somewhere by the lakeâs shoreline, Aunt Sia called, âDelsin! I think I have a way there!â
Dad sighed, patting my backâand as I looked up at him, he managed to give me a genuineâalbeit tiredâsmile. âLetâs go get your friends back,â he murmured.
âwhite mourning.â

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I think âyou donât know what itâs got until itâs goneâ is really about the ability to breathe through your nose and the misery that having a cold brings
Do you have a character that you're feeling neutral about when thinking about them separately but this character also has a narrative cOnNeCtIoN with your fave so you're developing affection for the said character vicariously thru your blorbo?
Chapter 45 â New Frontiers
Dr. Sims pulled his coat a bit closer as the wind passed in another rough gust, the breeze that came down from the Rockies brutal. âWhen I started working with Project Sanctuary after escaping, she already had a lot of people she snuck over the border. Adding the people I sent her way, on top of what you did for Alessia?â He shrugged like he wasnât fully sure of the number but trusted his guess enough. âProbably around seventy people. I think itâs a bit more than that, actually.â
8.3k word count | TRIGGER WARNINGS: Mentions of abduction, murder, state-sponsored imprisonment and state-sponsored manhunt. Canon-typical law breaking.
Montana.
Deep in Montana was a friend of Aunt Sia and Dr. Simsâ from their day as an agent with Project Sanctuary. Apparently, they were a key component to helping sneak high profile Conduits over the border and out of the DUPâs graspâand they were willing to do it one last time for old timesâ sake.Â
Of course, that was if we could even make it past the border to begin with. Which suddenly got very hard when Dr. Sims got a notification on his phone while they talked logistics, mouth immediately tensing into a thin straight line. âDelsin, look,â He said, holding his phone out for Dad to take. Â
Dad took the phone, scanning something on the screen before cursing aloud. âShit. Shit!â He looked between Dr. Sims and Aunt Sia in equal parts upset and disbelief. âWhat the hell are we supposed to do?â
Well that was a response I didnât like. I was still hovering nearby, left in place when he detached from meâbut his outburst was enough to catch the attention of everyone else and they soon joined.Â
Is everything okay? Cat asked immediately, eyes wide as she assumed the worst.Â
I gave them all a look of helplessness, not having any answers myself before turning to Dad. âWhatâsâŚwhatâs going on?â
Dad looked at me, and I could see his rejection at my curiosity play on his face, that rolling door of fatherly dismissals spinning around in his head: donât worryâŚIâll handle itâŚitâs nothingâŚ
But then he glanced at Aunt Sia and she gave him a single nod, and he sighed hard, relenting. âLook,â he said, holding up the phone for us to look at the screen.Â
Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no. There on the breaking news stream was a still of us, all of usâZeke, Aunt Sia and Dr. Sims around Dr. Simsâ phone as Dad turned towards our group, gesturing towards the camera, mouth caught open in a demand while I looked up at him. On the other side of the screen, Brent stood there, arm around Mei, and Dom beside them, all of them in various states of shock as Cat stood, hand outâa glob hurtling towards the camera at a speed too fast for its frame rate to capture fully.Â
The drone. It got an image of us.Â
And the newscasterâs voice rang out over the still image: ââspotted at Linus Pauling Charter School in the Sellwood neighborhood of Portland, Oregon, where multiple Joint Task Force agents were found injured.â The manâs voice said. The window minimized, and to the right of the screenshot taken from the droneâs stream, three red lines appeared, connecting Dadâs face to his old photo for the COLE committee board, and Brent and my photos from last yearsâ school picture day.Â
âThree people have been identified as Delsin Rowe and his children, Regina and Brent Rowland, who Public Affairs Spokesperson Gavin Parker has stated that the Department of Homeland Security wishes to speak to in connection with the recent attack on the school as well as other incidents. DHS has also identified two more people in the footage: COLE founder Alessia Donovan and Doctor Eugene Sims of the Second Age Movement. DHS is working on identifying other people in this image, and asks if you have any information about any of these individuals or where they could be now, to callââ
Dad clicked the side of Dr. Simsâ phone, turning off the news stream as we all fell into silence. He raised the phone like he was going to spike it against the ground before Dr. Sims interjected with âDelsin!â and snatched it back when he hesitated.Â
Dad pressed his palms into his eyes. âShit,â he growled to himself.
And I couldnât help but agreeânot only were our faces plastered everywhere, but now theirs were too, on this huge national manhunt for us. âWhat do we do?â I asked Dad.Â
One of his hands came off of his eyes, holding up and begging me to give him a moment. His other ran over his face before freeing himself, blinking through whatever stars he produced in his vision as his eyes snapped to Aunt Sia and Dr. Sims.Â
And he repeated my exact question at them. âWhat do we do?â
Both glanced at each other, their gaze unsteady; until now, it had been about Dad and usâbut now they were dragged into this mess. Not just them; everyone here was on that screen moments ago: Zeke, glasses barely obscuring his identity, Mei and Dom beside BrentâŚ
And Cat, who had shot the drone down with her powers.
Dr. Sims was the first to clear his throat. âWeâll have to assume Homeland Security will start trying to actively find us,â he said. âBetween the destruction of property and us breaking into the school, theyâre going to assume we know more than we do.â
âWe do know more,â Dad stressed.
âYeah, but theyâre not going to think we have good intentions,â Dr. Sims pointed out. âWe have to assume theyâll start cracking down hard to try to find us.â
âDelsinâŚâ Aunt Sia drew off, glancing behind Dad where we all stood as if to say not in front of them.Â
Dad followed her eyes back to us, hesitating as he took us all in, eyes especially landing on Cat. His expression grew grim the more he looked until he finally said, âBrent, Jeanâcome here. Zekeâstay with the kids for a minute.â
Zeke thankfully moved without a quip to test Dadâs patience as he pulled us aside, all pooling together with Dr. Sims and Aunt Sia by the hood of the car. âThis is bad,â Brent said helpfully. Like that wasnât already obvious.Â
Dad bit his tongue, exhaling sharply though his nose like a pissed off bull that was seeing red. âOkay, we need to figure out what to do,â he said, motioning over my and Brentâs shoulders towards my friends. âTommy and Theresa are in the situation theyâre in right now because they were on the news. Now they all are! How the hell are we supposed to keep them all from getting snatched by Celia now?â
Aunt Sia held up a placating hand. âBreathe,â she said, earning nothing but a scornful look from Dad. He stopped rambling, though. âCeliaâs already got Tommy and Theresa, sheâd have no need for any of them.â
âYeah, for now,â Dad responded sardonically.Â
âCat says no one in her family knows about her powers,â Brent interjected. âAnd her and Tommyâs family arenâtâŚthe best. Her mom might not freak, butâŚâ
Dadâs lip twitched as he placated a sneer. âYeah, I know,â he huffed; Tommyâs grandfather had happily taken Dadâs aid through the initial onset of his illness, but was absolutely vocal about how much he disliked where the funding for his treatment was coming from, cursing COLE and Dadâs work to hell.Â
Happily benefited from it, though. Didnât seem to object to it enough to reject it.Â
Dad frowned, worrying the inside of his bottom lip as he chewed on it. âWe need to hide them,â he finally said, turning in place to look at Aunt Sia and Dr. Sims. âFind somewhere for them to lie low, not be so easy to pinpoint. At least until we get to where Celia is holding the others.âÂ
âWe send them towards COLE,â Aunt Sia suggested. âSeattle chapter. Iâll send word to Arthur and heâll hide them for us for now, at least until we can be sure theyâll be safe.âÂ
Of course, none of that could happen until we said goodbye.Â
I had my friends for all of two hours. Two measly hours of remembering what it was like to be with them before it was time to leave again and solve another issue. Despite my initial shame and not wanting to even see them to begin withâŚI wasnât ready to let that go. Not yet. The bear hug between Mei and I was bone and soul crushing, and the side hug with Dom was more tender than anything I was used to from him. I watched Mei stretch on her toes to kiss Brent on his blush stained cheek before looking for Cat to find her with her arms wrapped around herself, holding back tears.Â
âHey,â I murmured, stepping forward. My hands came to her shoulders and I gave her a gentle squeeze. âWeâll message you when weâve got him, okay?â
Cat sniffled, wiping her eyes with her hands as she noddedâthough she didnât seem sure. Sure was, in fact, the last word Iâd use to describe her; she was chewing on her lip like she wanted to rip it clean off, fiddling with her fingerless gloves. Behind her, Mei separated from Brent and seemed to clue in to the catastrophe going on over here, and called, âCat? Câmon, we shouldâŚwe should go.â
Mei and Dom started towards the Honda, a long ride back ahead of themâbut Cat didnât move. She looked up at me with pleading blue eyes as she stopped playing with her gloves to tell me I want to come with you guys. Â
Oh, that drop something inside my chest made was enough to make me want to immediately yell at her. What the hell did she mean she wanted to come with us? Instead I shook my head instead of trying to shake sense into her. âYou canât,â I stressed.Â
I should, she reiterated with gusto, putting emphasis on the motion. I need to help Tommy, heâs the closest thing I have to a brother. I should be there. Iâm a Conduit, I can helpâ
I shook my head. Is this how Dad felt every time I rambled on about wanting to help out? All I could think about was how dangerous itâd be for her. âCat, these guys are dangerous,â I told her. âLike, these are the same guys that kidnapped me at the mall. They literally just broke into the school.â I pulled her in again, hugging tight as she deflated against meâor as much as she could with me being way shorter than her. âJustâweâll have him call you, okay? The moment weâre safe. And then you can tell your mom and grandfather, and weâll bring him back.â
I tried not to let my own thoughts get to me as I placated her. What if Tommy wasnât okay? Was Celia really below torturing someone? And if we did save Tommy and Reese, theyâd still be in danger. Hell, I was scared for Cat now, because what if Celia found out about her powers? What would keep her from making Cat likeâŚlike me? A broken husk of a Conduit. I couldnât let that happen to a friend of mine, not when her arm laced across my back was enough to make that spot between my shoulder blades twinge at her touch.Â
No, I couldnât let that happen. As much as I understood how badly she wanted to helpâŚâYou should stay. Besides,â I said, motioning to the Honda with a small nod of my head. âThey could probably use a Conduit to watch them right now. God forbid if these guys learn Brentâs dating Mei, I donât wanna imagine what they might do to get to himâor Dadâthrough her.âÂ
Cat huffed. This is just your way of trying to make me feel useful, she accused.Â
I chuckled. âA bit,â I agreed in jest, before letting the laugh fall to put something more pensive on my face. âAnd we both know Tommy wouldnât want you to do this.â
TommyâŚI was still conflicted on how to feel about him. He was a dick, left me to die, sold out my familyâbut he was also being held hostage simply because he said our names on a news segment. It felt unfair. And if there was one thing I knew about the guy, itâs that he loved Cat with everything in him. He was already lacking family, and she was the closest thing he had to make up for it. Heâd never want her to do this. Itâs probably why he gave himself up to Archangel to begin with. To protect her.Â
I didnât want her to end up like me.Â
And Cat, whatever defiance she had that had knotted itself in her throat seemed to go down with her next swallow as she nodded, relenting. Alright, she said, looking like she hated that the words slipped from her own fingers. You guys just be careful, please. And talk to us. She added in chastisement, making my ears feel hot. No more fucking hiding or anything.Â
If she was willing to put in the effort to sign the curse word, she was serious, something I wasnât exactly willing to fight against knowing she could fight back. âAlright,â I promised.Â
We left Washington in our rear view mirror after that, traveling back east once more as we followed Aunt Siaâs tail light like a beacon on I-84. Dr. Sims had taken the passengerâs side seat, laptop propped on his knee as he searched for more about Purcell and what it could hold.Â
Dad didnât speak. Not at the beginning. Not until all the way at our first stop at a gas station somewhere in Idaho.Â
Dad opened the back of the van, telling Brent and I to grab the coffees in his hands before clambering in, reaching into the bag hooked on his inner elbow to pull out a half-dozen box of donuts. âItâs no cake,â he said, nodding to Zeke to signal to him to close the door. âButâŚhappy birthday.â
Brent immediately reached for some jelly-filled, powdery mess I hated knowing he was gonna tear apart while sitting where we slept, asking jokingly, âWhat, no candles?â
Dad huffed, trying to repress his exhausted smile. âCan give you some smoke to blow around if itâll make you feel better.â
I chuckled, pulling out my own glazed and chocolatey treat. âYou always told us not to smoke,â I said before taking a bite and washing it down with something that was mildly mocha flavored and watered down a considerable amount.
âYeah, and I also told you both to never drink, and look how well you listened there,â Dad playfully snapped back. The van lurched and Zeke moved to get back on the highway, the rev of Aunt Siaâs motorcycle following behind us now. âDo you know how hard it is to be the cool parent when you ignore the rules I do give you?âÂ
Brent spoke through his next bite. âDid you ever listen to your parentsâ rules?â
Dadâs smile finally broke through. âBarely. Which is why I get on you guys about it. I was a teenager once.â
The car fell silent save for Dr. Sims directing Zeke back to the on ramp and the aggravating sound of Brent trying to lick jelly off of his finger. I ate my own donut slowly, trying to get it to settle against the knots in my stomach that kept churning with every thought of my best friend trapped somewhere in the mountains simply because Dadâs old foe had a bone to pick with him.Â
And speaking of Dadâafter the brief joke, his gaze returned to the front windshield, frown deepening the lines on his face once again as he slipped off to think about his own troubles. His hand clenched at his side like he was preparing to use his power, shoulders just as stiff as they were on the ride to Portland.Â
He was beyond stressed. Why wouldnât he be? Our pictures were plastered on the news, two people were missing and a bunch killed over the course of the last monthâall in his name. And now we were going to have to go confront this Celia personâsomeone who had poisoned Mom, me, caused so many issues for Dad years agoâand follow whatever clues she was leaving Dad to send him on the worldâs worst trivia hunt.Â
Iâm surprised he wasnât more grey in the hair, honestly. Or bald.Â
But, despite the hairline only being salt-and-pepper, I did notice the bags that cradled his lower lash, how the gaunt in his cheeks seemed to illuminate deeper in the shine of the brake lights ahead. We were well on the road and he hadnât even touched his own coffeeâhe didnât even have anything to eat, I suddenly realized. When was the last time I did see him eat? Sleep? Every time I woke up on the road, back sore, he was there; awake, glaring at some nondescript place in the van with clenched fists.
But that shadow across his face was too dark for me to want to confront this fact directly. Instead, I simply nudged the side of his thigh with my boot and asked, âArenât you gonna eat one?â
Dad blinked, settling back down on Earth as he refocused on me. âHmm?â he hummed before fully processing my question. His chuckle felt forced. âItâs not my birthday, Jeanie. Iâm fine.â
I tried to quell my frown into something more playful. âNo, itâs notâbut you should eat,â I said in turn.Â
Dadâs jaw twitched slightly. âIâm fine,â he repeated.Â
God, he was stubborn.Â
So, instead of arguing with him or continuing this back-and-forth where we both would ignore the otherâs veiled response, I simply ripped the donut in my hand in half and held out a piece to him. âItâs no different than a slice of cake,â I said when he gave me a deadpanned look. âIâm not going to finish both of these, anyways. Iâm not Brent.â
âHey!â
Dad hesitated for a secondâbut it seemed like he decided it was just as useless to argue with me as I did him, because he took the piece and bit into it in defeat.Â
Brent, who was looking for something to wipe his sticky hands off on, asked, âSo what are we gonna do once we get there?âÂ
Dad grabbed one of the napkins and a water bottle that had been partially drunk, tipping it into the napkin until it was wet and handing it to Brent wordlessly. His face, though, took on that same tense-jawed and low-browed look heâs had since we left Boston. âIâm not sure,â he admitted. âWe have to find exactly where Theresaâs phone location pinged first, and thatâll help us see if Archangel is there or if it was triangulated. If itâs triangulated, then Eugene and I will have to figure out the exact location so we can find where theyâre holding her and Tommy.â
Suddenly the chocolate glaze tasted a lot more like mud. âButâŚyou think sheâs there, right?â I asked. What if that was the phoneâs last location and she was justâŚgone? How were we supposed to help her then?
Dad immediately nodded. âSheâs probably there. Or at least close,â he rushed to reassure me. âTriangulating her location isnât hard, it just takes a minute. From thereâŚ.â
He drew off; because from there, weâd be flying in blind in the hope that weâd be able to pull this off without anything bad happening.Â
Brent finished the thought for Dad. âFrom there, we wing it?â
Dad huffed something that wouldâve been humorous if he didnât look so stressed. âYeah. Wing it.â he agreed, barely hiding the bitterness to his tone.Â
Brent and I shared an unsure glance, Dadâs tone not exactly helping quell the anxiety that had my heart doing somersaults in my chest. Really, I couldnât blame him; it had been years since Seattle, and here he was, haunted by ghosts he thought he banished long ago. Particularly malevolent poltergeists who had no problem causing issues in and for his name.Â
Quite honestly, the longer I thought about the whole thing, the higher my own blood pressure spiked.Â
But the one thing I kept thinking about was that day in Zekeâs hut, when Dad pulled out the photographs he had taken during his time chasing the trail of bodies Celia left for him to find. âThere are people out there that will see you as nothing more than a chance to hurt someone else,â Dad had said as I tried my hardest to avoid looking at the wounds on the body strung to a billboard by a cosplay sword. âThese are the kind of people Iâm trying to keep from hurting you.âÂ
Little did he know, they already had.Â
And now, there were two innocent people in the hands of someone that wasnât above doing something so below the belt to make that log of death a little longer.Â
What scared me the most was that we might already be too late.Â
âDad?â
I seemed to have caught him right as he shoveled the rest of the donut half into his mouth, because he had to swallow it back with a gulp before asking, âYeah, Jean?â
âDo youâŚâ I had to find the strength to even ask it aloudâit felt like jinxing them, in a way. âDo you think Reese and Tommy areâŚare even alive?â
The whole car grew stiff with my question; Zekeâs hold on the steering wheel grew white, Dr. Simsâ typing stopped. Even Brent froze, glancing at Dad with his own unease, like I finally voiced something that had been bothering him too.Â
And Dad? He seemed entirely unsure of what to say.Â
He stalled for time, I knew thatâs what he was doing; he kept chewing but slowed, and decided to swallow it back with a long drink from his water bottle. But finally he peeled it away from his lips and cleared his throat.Â
âIâm not sure,â he admitted. âBut CeliaâŚwhen she has an agenda, she doesnât stray from it. Thereâs a reason she took your friends. I think theyâre alive, butâŚâ he exhaled, running a hand over his face. âJustâdonât take it as a promise, alright?â
Yeah, that wasnât exactly reassuring.Â
Dad saw my grimace and immediately tried to dissuade my doubts. âBut thatâs a worst-case-scenario,â he said, looking between Brent and I. âThem being alive is crucial to whatever sheâs planning. Youâve seen what Archangel can doâif she wanted them dead, theyâd be dead.â
That didnât make me feel better, but at least he was trying.Â
Brent seemed just as unsure. âThenâŚwhy take them?â he asked.Â
Dad sighed, shifting where he sat on the mattress topper and throwing an arm over the knee he brought up towards his chest. He seemed to chew on his words like cud before deciding they were best spit out and unfiltered. âI think Celia knows I wouldnât come to her without a reason, and sheâs done depending on others to do the job. She sent Akurans after Jean and you, and you both managed to get out of that. They bombed COLE thinking Iâd come running, but I didnât respond to that fast enough.Â
âIf I had to guess,â Dad continued, weighing a thought in his head by tilting it side to side. âShe probably figured out that I wasnât local and went to the one place she thought Iâd beâthe Akomish reservation. AndâŚwell, we know how that went,â he said with an uncomfortable glance at me. âI was late home. She still missed me. So instead of trying to find me, she's forcing me to come find her. Your friends are reassurance that I will.âÂ
âSo sheâŚkidnapped a couple of random people, to make sure youâd come to her?â I asked. âWhatâs keeping her from killing them the moment you find her?â
Dadâs face grew dark with the idea. âBecause she knows I wonât listen if she does that.â
He sighed hard, shaking his head to banish the thoughts before he pushed the donut box towards us again. âJust eat,â he said a bit sharply, before schooling his face into an apologetic smile. âSorry itâs not much. Your 18th should be more exciting.âÂ
Frankly, I felt lucky enough to even be alive for my 18th, so I wasnât exactly going to complain.Â
At least the drive towards my best friendâs kidnapper was pretty.Â
As the sun rose, the horizon stretched, Idahoâs panhandle giving away to the Rockies as we traveled closer to Montana. A nearly twelve hour drive (or, ten, as Dad broke multiple laws when he and Zeke traded places) spent mostly on the road had left me with my ass numb from sitting for so long, left to do nothing but stare at the scenery through the front windshield. The mountains fell back to vast plains as we entered the heartlands of the Treasure State, cutting from east to north before hopping off the highway and following the two-lane freeway towardsâŚ
âThe Blackfeet Nation?â I read off of the sign next to the two metal effigies of Blackfeet people on horseback staring off at the wide plains before glancing at Dad in confusion. But there it was in bold lettering, greeting us as we entered the Blackfoot Reservation from the East Glacier Park entranceâor, Omah-ko-yis, the translated sign said.Â
Dad nodded when I stopped craning my neck to check out the critters atop of the four flags at the art installment. âSneaking Conduits into Canada wasnât exactly easy,â he said from the driversâ seat as I stuck my head in the space where the center console was. âEspecially when the DUP were patrolling every major border entry. Your Aunt Sia, though? Found a way to help Conduits escape.â
And so we followed the path to that escape; off the scenic loop and into the woods till Dad turned onto a fire access road that was more gravel than dirt, driving until the pines split to revealâŚ
Another van?
This one was far less conspicuous than Zekeâs; it was plain white, one of those vans perfect for some sort of event company and with the logo to match: Prairie Sage Events. A sprig of sage crossed over a single stem of wheat above the printed and sun-bleached words, an address in Alberta etched below it.Â
The driversâ side door opened the moment we were visible, and out climbed this excitable older woman. She had crows feet at her eyes that spoke of a thousand smiles that had crossed her face over the decades, her plaited braids more white than brown. She looked older than Zeke, and she had a slight wobble to her like Betty did, favoring her right knee more than the leftâbut she was still spry, waving avidly as Dad threw the van in park. When Zeke opened his door I could hear her declare, ââBout time I finally meet yous guys!âÂ
Dad helped us get out of the van, and I rounded it in time to hear Aunt Siaâs motorcycle taper off and see the woman point a first finger adorned with a silver and turquoise ring at Dad. âDelsin Rowe, obviously,â she said, like it was as obvious as the brewing snow clouds above. âHard mistaking your face when itâs the tagline of every news site I log into.â
She shook his handâand nothing happened. She was human. Releasing Dad, she looked at Aunt Sia, saying, âAnd itâs nice to finally put a face to King Rat,â she grinned.Â
Brent glanced at me, bewildered that the woman called Aunt Sia thatâat least before the redhead laughed, responding in turn, âYou too, Robin.âÂ
The woman smiled, waving her off. âNo need for that anymore. Call me Cassie,â she said. âMiss, if youâve gotta add anything to it.â
âCassie, then,â Aunt Sia stepped aside, motioning towards Zeke. âYou know Bulldogâand Angel,â she added before waving at Dr. Sims. Suddenly it made sense: they were monikers, probably from their time in Project Sanctuary.Â
Zeke stepped forward to take Cassieâs hand next, eyes just barely peaking out from over his sunglasses. âSo this is our reincarnated Harriet Tubman,â he joked.Â
Cassie waved him off. âWhat I did hardly counts as something like that,â she saidâthough she did seem rather pleased with the praise. She shifted on her feet slightly as she let go of Zekeâs handâand in her movement, spotted Brent and I in the back of the group. Motioning towards us with a jerk of her head, she asked, âAre those the charges in the back?â
Aunt Sia glanced back. âOh, no, those areâthatâs my niece and nephew.â
Cassieâs eyes narrowed a bitânot suspicious, but analytical, like she could physically see the web connecting us to Dad as she glanced his way. âLooks like the kids Iâve been seeing on the news with you.â The silent question was loud: what are they doing here?
Dr. Sims stepped forward. âRoâCassie,â he corrected himself. âWe couldnât explain everything over the phone just in case, butâŚwe need to get into Canada.â He motioned behind him at the strange party we made; two barely-adults, the original pioneer of the underground group she worked with, a man whoâs been there since the beginning, the leader of the Second Age and the man who started that second age by defeating Augustine.Â
And instead of doing the smart thingâturning around and washing her hands of whatever issues we were bound to bring into her lifeâshe simply glanced back at her van before looking back at Dr. Sims and saying, âWell. Itâs gonna be a tight squeeze.â
Brent and I were volun-told to help Cassie unload the vehicle so that everyone could hop in and ride off to Canada, and I was having trouble seeing how we were supposed to do that and not get caught. Especially when she opened the back doors, and all I saw were tables and chairs. âI do a lot of event work, so hauling around tables and chairs isnât exactly too suspect,â she told us, passing me a folding chair to prop against a nearby oak.
Brent took the two tables she offered with one hand, holding them with ease before he dragged a couple chairs towards himself. âAny way to convince them that the six people hiding in the back of your van are also pretty normal?â he asked, unceremoniously plopping them in the snow.Â
Cassie simply smiled. âWell, Iâm not sure about six,â she drawled, turning to grab another table. She kept her glance back on us, though, and winked. âBut I do have my own ways of making sure they stay none the wiser.â
Instead of pulling out the table and passing it to Brent and I, her fingers flinched and there was a click as two latches undid, and she pulled down.Â
And instead of the remaining chairs falling with a clatter, a door came down, revealing a hidden hatch drilled into the back of the van. It wasnât big; maybe large enough to hide a person and a bag of their things? But it was hidden, totally unnoticeable upon first glance, and thatâs what mattered.
My eyes widened. âWoahâŚis that how you snuck people over the border?â I asked, clambering in to get a better look.Â
Cassie straightenedâor as well as she could in the back of the vanâand the pride on her face was unmistakable. âFor sure!â She said. âYour buddy Bulldog made the blueprint for it and all. Iâve kept it this whole time in case something happened againâthat, and itâs great to run mickeys and those really bad cereals over the border without getting caught.âÂ
Brent shot me a bewildered look to mouth like the mouse? before Cassie drew our attention again by slapping the top of the hidden alcove. âBut, back then, this was how I got those wanted Conduits out of the situation they were in. YepâI picked up the poor kids theyâd send my way, hide âem in here, and go back home with them.â
I cocked my head aside. âSo you live in Canada and come down here?âÂ
âSure do,â she confirmed with a nod. ââCause of that Jay Treaty you guys have, I get to hop around wherever I wanna without all the visa bullshit. Which kinda came in handy when youâre looking to smuggle people with the least amount of pushback possible.â
âJay treaty?â I glanced at Brent, who looked just as lost.Â
Cassie chuckled. âWell, it was called thatânow itâs some sorta immigration law I canât bother to remember. Seeâwhen your Yankees gave the boot to Britain, you guys made this deal with them about Canadaâsince we were under the crown. There was this little footnote in there that let First Nations come into America for work without all those extra visa steps youâve gotta go through. Things changed long since then, but America kept that agreementââ
âThatâs surprising,â Brent muttered sardonically under his breath, throwing me a look. America wasnât exactly known for keeping their agreements with Natives.
ââso, legally, I can come and go as I please,â she finished, an amused toothy smile on her face that said she fully agreed with Brentâs assessment.Â
The full scheme was beginning to make sense in my mind, and I couldnât help but be impressed. âSo youâd come over here to the states pretending to workâŚâÂ
Cassie nodded. âAnd Iâd pick up whoever Sanctuary sent me, hide âem, and sneak âem away before those keeners in their bee suits caught wind and locked the poor Conduits up.âÂ
I mimicked her nod, hoping she didnât know that I had no idea what half of what she said meant.Â
Brent, though, moved on to one truly pressing question of his as he helped me back out of the van. âSo youâre not a Conduit?âÂ
Cassie followed close, though she only moved to sit at the end of the vanâs cargo bay. âNope,â she confirmed, swinging her legs over the edge and letting them kick. âNever got in on that fun. Was hoping Iâd get to have the chance to fly without paying for airfare, but I never got lucky.â
I wanted to know: âHow many Conduits did you help?â
She paused, drumming her fingers on the lid of the compartment before using the other to wave off the question. âAh, thereâs no use keeping score of all thatââ
âAbout seventy.â
We turned; Dad, Dr. Sims, Zeke and Aunt Sia had finished whatever it was they didnât want us overhearing, moving to join us instead and catching the end of the conversation. Dad climbed into the van without comment or fanfaire, gently steering me aside to take my place and look at the hidden alcove.Â
Dr. Sims pulled his coat a bit closer as the wind passed in another rough gust, the breeze that came down from the Rockies brutal. âWhen I started working with Project Sanctuary after escaping, Cassie already had a lot of people she snuck over the border. Adding the people I sent her way, on top of what you did for Alessia?â He shrugged like he wasnât fully sure of the number but trusted his guess enough. âProbably around seventy people. I think itâs a bit more than that, actually.â
Cassie took a minute to process that before blinking, immediately trying to downplay the action. âItâs nothing,â she said. âI know you guys had a lot more runnersââ
âNone as good as you,â Aunt Sia cut off, something gentle and admiring and grateful in her tone. âYou were the first one to help me get people over the border, too.â
Cassieâs toothy grin was almost proud, but she still had enough humility in her to be humble. âHonestly, I probably wouldâve tried doing it anywaysâand without your planning, I wouldâve been caught.â She patted the top of the hidden compartment. âAnd hopefully you have a good plan here, too, or weâre all going to be spending the night in prison. Theyâre gonna do a cabin check at the border, and all of you arenât fitting in this thingââ
âWe have a plan, donât worry,â Dr. Sims reassured her.
I was not having a good time.Â
Dad demanded I hide in the alcove, tucked away from the world in case something happened. The issue was, he wanted someone to be there in case Iâd need backup, and theyâd have to hide, too. Which meant Brent was shoved into the single-person-space with me, so close I was practically sitting in his lap.Â
âWhy do you breathe so hard?â he grumbled, shifting uncomfortably.Â
âBecause youâre taking up the entire goddamn hatch,â I hissed back, trying to readjust to find a more comfortable position that didnât involve his knee in my ass. âSeriously, dude, youâre not even that tallââ
âIâm six foot!â Brent defended.Â
âBarelyââ
There was a rapt on the door of the hidden compartment. âHey! Enough,â Dadâs voice commanded on the other side. He, Aunt Sia, Zeke and Dr. Sims were in the vanâs cargo space as Cassie steered this strange ship of stowaways towards the Canadian border crossing in the hopes that we could cross itâŚwithout getting arrested or deported.
The only way I could see anything happening on the other side of the hidden alcoveâs door was through a hole where a screw once was, the tiniest porthole to see the adults (or, adultier adults, I suppose; Iâd have to get used to the idea of being 18) bob along with the bumpy road in the cargo bay of the van. Dad was closest to the hidden compartment, back against the hatch, shoulder just barely brushing the bottom of my peephole.Â
âDo we both have to be in here?â I complained now that I had a visual of him.Â
Dad sighed, shoulders dropping with the movement in exasperation. âYou two can make it to Canada,â he said, shaking his head in a way I was sure was accompanied by an eye roll. âIâll let you out once weâre over the border and somewhere safe.â I could hear the plea in the undertone: for the love of God, stop bickering till then.Â
Hard to want to be quiet when Brentâs knee was closer to my tailbone than my own spine was.Â
On the opposite side of us, beyond the barrier of the vanâs cabin, Cassie called loud enough to be heard through the metal, âWeâre about to hit the border crossing!âÂ
Dad hushed us once more, adding a âBe quiet!â for good measure that suggested it wasnât a request. His head turned, and I could see the profile of his face as he asked, âReady Eugene?âÂ
âThink so,â Dr. Sims said from somewhere to the right. âI need you guys to back up as far as you canâif itâs too thin, theyâll be able to see through it.âÂ
See through it?
Everyone outside of the small alcove moved around as the van pattered to a stop, and soon I was watching the world from over Dadâs shoulder as Dr. Sims slotted himself between them and the van door.Â
On the other side of the wall, the vanâs engine sputtered silent. âOki,â Cassie greeted. âComing back home after helping out at the council meeting!â
I strained my ears to hear beyond the van, and was just barely able to make out the voice of a man. âVisa or identification?â
âIDâhereâs my tribal card.â
There was a second voice, lower and scratchier, the audible proof of dozens of cigarettes smoked. âWeâll need you to open the back,â he said. All but commanded. âAnything to declare?â
Yeah, just five stowaways currently wanted for questioning by Americaâs Homeland Security!
âNothing but some tables and chairs,â Cassie responded instead, voice surprisingly smooth and calm for someone actively committing multiple felonies. Guess her work from before trained the fear out of her tone.Â
Unfortunately, it wasnât enough to keep them from wanting to find out for themselves. âMind if we check the back?â
To which the pilot of our very illegal vehicle said, âSureâyouâll need the key in the ignition, though.â
Brent shot me an uneasy glance, my skepticism reflected in his face; but Cassieâs words seemed to be some sort of signal, because by the time Brentâs brow finished arching, something blue flickered at the seams of the hidden boxâincluding through my little porthole, which I immediately peeked through.Â
Dr. Sims had those strange, runestic floating gauntlets around his wrists, crawling up his arms like technological bangles as they pulsed with the energy of a dozen LED car headlights and the static of a slide in summer. He pushed the ringlets forward and they grew, conjoined and multiplied until an entire wall of blue sat between the door and where we all hid. It shimmered blue, then white, then began to gain texture and shadow and shape as it became a perfect mimic of how the van looked only a mere thirty minutes ago when tables and chairs were stacked within it. A perfect mimic.Â
A foolproof hologram.Â
Just as the blue and white settled and the pixels stopped shimmering, the back of the vanâs doors opened and two border patrol agents, both in the same nauseating green that I was sure my face was as they stared right at the others outside of the hidden alcove.Â
Except, they didnât jump with a start and yell and brandish guns or tase Dad or whatever. Even as the hologram seemed just a second too late in gaining the new shadows and highlights the sunlight pouring in gave it, they didnât flinch. âYou said you were helping with the council meeting?â the shortest guy asked, seemingly standing on his toes to try and look over the chairs in the hologram. âSeems pretty bare back here.â
âBusiness general session!â Cassie called from the cab of the van. âFirst one of the yearâa lot more people there and all, you know? They needed some extra tables and chairsâplus I planned the luncheon after.â
âAnd you didnât bring any food, right?â The taller one asked. âYou have to declare that, and weâd have to inspect any produce to make sureââ
âI didnât! That freezer back there hasnât worked in months, Iâve been meaning to get it fixed.â Cassie sounded so nonplussed at the lies, like they were practiced a thousand times over. I suppose, with all the work sheâs done before this with Project Sanctuary they were, unshaken despite the very undeclared cargo she had hiding behind that digital veil. She even had the gall to try and rush them with, âIs this going to take much longer? I have dinner plans with my daughter and the grandbabies today and the meeting ran late.â
A false timecrunch, a fake schedule to make her pressed for time, to urge the border patrol agents to believe the mirage in front of them and move on.Â
And after a beat, the taller agent nodded to the shorter, portly one, and the doors to the van closed, everyone collectively sighing in relief as Dr. Sims shook off the gauntlets of his power and let the hologram dissolve into pixels.
Dad looked over at Dr. Sims, his profile in the little porthole of my peek hole. âThat never stops being cool,â he said, the relief in his tone making his voice almost boyish.Â
âOh thank god,â Brent complained, pushing past me the moment Dad opened the hatch to the hidden alcove. His hand hit my chest and my back hit the van.Â
âHey!â
Brent at least had the manners to act a bit ashamed at his claustrophobia. âSorry, justâwas getting cramped in there.â
At least I could agree with that. I donât think Iâd been that close to him since we shared a womb. âNo kidding.â I crawled out of the end of the van, taking Dadâs hand to step out and look around.Â
We were hiding in another wooded side road, the sort that led to a home that was no longer standing save for its brick chimney. It was just barely dusk, the sky beginning to turn brilliantly purple and pink somewhere behind the treetops. Dr. Sims was already engrossed in his phone off on the side, only looking up when Dad began approaching him. Meanwhile, Zeke was being a surprisingly good gentleman, helping Cassie out of her driverâs seat once she swung open the door.Â
âI donât know how you did it,â she said, before holding her arms out wide. âButâwelcome to Canada.â
Dad made it to Dr. Simsâ side just as Aunt Sia pulled something up on her own phone. âHow far are we?â He asked.Â
Dr. Sims pinched the screen and zoomed in on what looked likeâŚgoogle maps, if it was blue-tinted and cyberpunk. âAbout two hundred and thirty-five miles,â he told Dad. The finger shifted, and the map became 3D. âBoth across and up.â
Dad groaned. âJoy,â he rolled his eyes at the idea of hiking. Not that I didnât agree with him; doing any sort of hiking was hell. In winter? Worse.Â
And when we were going after someone who actively tried to kill us, multiple ways?Â
Yeah, not exactly thrilled about the merit badge this hike would earn us.Â
Dr. Sims looked sorry, but made sure Dad knew: âItâs the last place Jeanâs friendâs location pinged,â he told Dad.Â
Meanwhile, Cassie turned to Zeke. âWith a trip that long, you all better get going,â she said, holding the keys to her van out for Zeke to take. In turn, he took the keys to his van out of his vest and offered them to her, which she immediately pocketed.Â
âTo keep a fella honest,â he joked.
Cassie chuckled politely. âIâll have my daughter take me over the border to pick up the van tomorrow,â she said, before pointing a finger at him accusingly. âYou better bring my van back in one piece. Iâd hate to have to paint over yours.âÂ
I hated the underlying pledge in the exchange; âI am taking the keys to your van, to replace what I lose if you dieâ.Â
Not really the chipper farewell we could use right now.Â
Cassie seemed to at least sense that, raising her voice so we all could hear her say, âAnd you call me when youâre done saving those kids, so I can sneak you right back over and you can take them to their families. It was nice, finally meeting the faces behind the call signs,â she added, holding out a hand to shake.Â
Aunt Sia stepped forward, taking the womanâs handânot really in a professional way, but something that translated into a thanks deeper than what strangers who technically just met should exchange. âThank you for helping me one last time.â
Those who knew her from Project Sanctuary gave her farewells with equal gratitude, Dad nodding with a smile before returning to delegating with Dr. Sims about the trip. It was in that lull that she turned to Brent and I.Â
âYou two be careful out there, alright?â she said earnestly. âYouâve got quite the mission in front of you.â
âYeah, itâsâŚâ I sighed, shoving my worrying hands away in my pockets.Â
âA clusterfuck?â Brent offered bluntly.
âDude!â
Instead of being aghast at Brentâs candor, Cassie just chuckled. âI wasnât gonna say it, butâŚâ she held up her hands in mock surrender.Â
They fell back to her side with a soft clap at her sides, and her exhale feltâŚheavy. Far too heavy for someone who didnât know us, and dense with things she felt she couldnât say because of that fact. âJustâlisten to your elders. They know what theyâre talking about when it comes to stuff like this. Trust me, I know.â
Brent took the farewell with a nod, leaving to go to where Aunt Sia was currently fiddling with something in her bootâbut I stayed hovering, only speaking to interject when it looked like she was about to leave. âWait! Whenââ I cut off, letting her take a moment to recalibrate as she heard me, turning. âWhen you were doingâŚeverything for Project Sanctuaryâwerenât you ever scared? Of getting caught or something happening to you?â
Despite how stupid the question sounded to my own ears, Cassie just laughed, like a schoolteacher having to explain to a kid something simple, like where the sun goes at night. âAlways,â she admitted. Casually. Jokingly. âY'think itâs not nerve-wracking, breaking multiple laws in multiple countries?âÂ
I couldnât help but stare at her. âBut youâŚyou arenât a Conduit. You arenât even American. So you did all that justâŚbecause?â I asked. She had no fight in this, blood or breed. She couldâve kept herself as far removed from the entire issue as possible. And she didnât?Â
Cassie simply chuckled, kicking a leg and waving me close like she was gonna share a secret. âLet me tell you something, kid: the most important thing you can do? Is stand. When itâs all on the line, and something more than yourself is at stake, you stand. The most dangerous thing that can happen to change is a person who wants to live in calm waters, because they believe if they donât make noise, the boogeyman wonât come looking for them. Tell me, did that work with the DUP?âÂ
I shook my head and she held up a hand as if to say see? âBundling yourself up to protect from the cold isnât going to change the weather, and lighting the smallest candle to not draw attention of the wolves wonât keep you warm either. A match or a bonfire, theyâll burn out all the same.âÂ
She put a hand on my shoulder. âChoose your own way to burn,â She quietly told me, like she was sharing sage old wisdom and trying to get it to seep into my bones with a gentle pat. Straightening, she said, âNow, Iâve got a good mile to walk to where I need to be to get picked up by my grandbaby, so I best get going. But you stay safe, alright?â
With a parting toothy grin, she turned to leave, and all I could do was watch her go and dwell on her words. So she did everythingâŚjust because she could? Because she felt like she should have? Regardless of the risks it posed to her, regardless of how she couldâve been arrested or shot or worse.Â
Without powers, she still risked it all.Â
âJean!â Dad called from the other side of the van. âCome here for a second, I need to see Theresaâs location on your phone again.âÂ
With one last glance at Cassieâs retreating form, I turned away.
âThe real damage is done by those millions who want to 'survive.' The honest men who just want to be left in peace. Those who donât want their little lives disturbed by anything bigger than themselves. Those with no sides and no causes. Those who wonât take measure of their own strength, for fear of antagonizing their own weakness. Those who donât like to make wavesâor enemies. Those for whom freedom, honour, truth, and principles are only literature. Those who live small, mate small, die small. Itâs the reductionist approach to life: if you keep it small, youâll keep it under control. If you donât make any noise, the bogeyman wonât find you. But itâs all an illusion, because they die too, those people who roll up their spirits into tiny little balls so as to be safe. Safe?! From what? Life is always on the edge of death; narrow streets lead to the same place as wide avenues, and a little candle burns itself out just like a flaming torch does. I choose my own way to burn.â
Sophie Scholl (May 9, 1921 - Feb 22, 1943)










