she said, it seems like you have yourself so figured out...
and maybe that is true, but then again
maybe i am just good at being open about not having myself figured all the way out
maybe i am just open about not bein perfect, maybe i am insecure,Â
but maybe... it's not about figuring yourself out...
life is about creating yourself
it's about showing who you are, and expressing everything about you
Itâs about saying, âhey! Look at me mothafucka, I am perfectly imperfect, fuck off, so are you!â
your deepest darkest secrets, your talents, your fears, your feats, your humor
never be afraid to delve into the secret corners of your mind where a beautiful creation may come out
if you feel you have ideas in your brain, you have feelings on your mind,Â
write about it! make a blog! write a song, write a script, write a story
draw about it, dance about it, sing about it, rap about it, create your fashion around it
never be afraid of the talent you have
depression and anxiety stem from keeping thoughts inside that are trying to break free
we are slowly but surely being locked into our own cells of society, media, and ipads and are forgetting
that people actually used to LIVE without electricity!Â
People actually SPOKE to each other,Â
they communicated, interacted, had conversations!
People had FUN! I think thatâs what we forget in this life of struggle and 9-5s⊠we forget to have fun.
Now a days its so about being flashy, being the perfect model, havin your lambo..
When really, life is about being yourself! Not being the mirror image of what society says you should be.
Back in the days They stood in front of crowds and spit their truths
thatâs the most impressive thing I find in freestyling, is that itâs straight from the brain, your feelings in rhymes...
But⊠I understand the struggles of life. Our emotions can come into play for a glimpse of a second, then stay longer than that. But plz ignore negative energy, it doesnât get you anything but a hot, sweaty plane ride in the back seats, little leg room, and a window seat with the jet propeller right in front of it so you canât see shit. Bullshit blocks your vision in life. Leave it for the pigz.Â
I have been up for about 21 hours straight, livin the life of an artist on da road. Feelin the anxiety, the pressure, the lack of sleep but still feelin wide awake. Jus got to the hotel room in Hilo after performing a bomb ass set at Karmaâs. What a dream to be living. To be able to be wanted somewhere where you have never been, you have never set foot in the club and people are already saying your name before you get on the stage. I see all these things going on around me. Although I am chill when I am off stage and I like to keep things humble, I see exactly what is going on around me.Â
I freak outâŠI let my emotions get the best of me sometimes and forget for a glimpse of a second that this is a business and that no matter how you feel, what you are going through, or where you are, THE SHOW MUST GO ON. And if you find out that you can release all that negative energy and turn it to + energy on stage, the people will RESPECT you for that. We literally got to a club where the security guards were totally against us being on the property because Vdot was underage. They were being hella dicks about it too, by telling us we couldnât even leave the property or wait in the parking lot, that we had to wait on a bench outside the bar. Then, after we killed the stage, the security guards were all on our dicks telling us we can wait there, that we changed the whole atmosphere for the club, that we got the party started! And thatâs what itâs all about, itâs about makin people feel good, makin them feel like they aint wastin their time comin out on Friday to have a good night.Â
   On our way back the hotel room, Trumps was driving me in da passenger, Vdot and Tbaby in da backseat. I was just reminiscing on the night and how fucking blessed I am to be able to experience this. Sometimes, I feel as if I am watching a movie unfold right in front of me. That I have my 3d glasses on, already toked up b4, and am watching the protagonist go through scene after scene, watching her talk to people who admire her, watching her fall flat face on the pavement only to spit out the dirt in her mouth to take another bite of life, watching her cry and sulk in her own pity because of her own stupid ass fears to only get on stage at the only and most popular night club on the Big Island and kill all her doubts to move the hearts of the people in the crowd. Her goal is bigger than her own dream itself, itâs to inspire, to shine, to make a difference in this life we live. Then, as I was thinking all this in my head, Trumps speeds over a speed bump and I dump my cup of iced water all over my jeans. Got out of the car, looks like I jus pissed myself.. Awesome night wit it âŠ. ;)
Jus got back to OahuâŠÂ Oh  OahuâŠ. How I have not been gone long enough to miss you yet. But, Kona did show us a dope time. The event at Rockstarz was poppin off with drinks, rap battles, cyphers, beat battles, and most of all, the dope per4mances. itâs tight to see the different hip hop scenes in the different areas. People are jus moreâŠ.family-like..Idk how to explain it, like their vibez are warm and welcoming. We went to eat at Ponds, Kens Pancake House, and Jack in the box (lol), but all the places, every1 was friendly which made the food taste hella flavorful and so good. Even the Chef at ponds came out to greet us and make sure we were enjoying the meal! I donât ever see dat here! Tonic Shotz Productions took care of us though, he was on point with it! He made sure we were taken care of with the hotel, green, rides, anything we needed, he was there. He drove us to the airport this morning and he was runnin on 15 min. of sleep, been up for 48 hrs⊠thatâs some tru hustling right there! But he was right, he said, âThatâs the business we are in, you best be ready for itâ. Mahalo to Big Shotz Productions for everything. That's how a promoter SHOULD do it... That's what happens when the person cares about their work and cares about the ppl... when he left, all he was screamin was "1Love! 1Love!" hell yeah, 1 love...
Rockstarz was fun and I met hella tight MCâs last night, everyone on the mic rocked it, Heroes for Hire, Nalu Grace, K.I.R., DeMarcus Styles, Mr. Tek, Island Mojo, Dubsesh, Chief Ragga and Trackbaby brought hot ass beats to the beat battle, Osna, IA ripped it, Definition and Kwalified also threw it down for Oahu, Gumz always bringin da positive energy, and the homie Redbeard (Been growin it for 7 years, the dreads, and prolly the green, lol naww, he is tight as hell though)!
Outside, we kicked it wit all of the scene, Trumps and his homies and home girls,Â
got some freestylin goin on, drinkin goin on, shmokin goin on, all to head back to da villa 4 a 3 hr sleep b4 the flight.Â
Â
Now I am here typing this up wishing I was still there for the dayâŠdidnât have time to enjoy where I was at, all work, no play.
Random thought: I hate wasting things⊠so why do I do it so often?
No one would ever have to be alone
Music would always have soul
Everyone would have a home
There is nothing less than hope
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