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If you do not spend time getting to know yourself, you will end up absorbing everyone else’s random and conflicting ideas about you. Knowing who you are on a very deep and intimate level is the best way to protect yourself from internalizing disempowering opinions from others. – Megan Lane
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in ignoring random error variance we suffer - internalizing what was left to the dice roll as a personal flaw.
#poetry
So today I was reminded just how much my past trauma and gaslighting still affects me and my work.
I was running a test with a subject and they didn't follow the directions.
And I immediately was like "I didn't explain it well enough. I have to stop and explain, but I didn't plan for having to stop and explain in the middle of the experiment and then completely restart. So now I'm out of time and it's all my fault."
Like literally it was their fault for not following the directions and not asking for clarification if they couldn't hear me.
I'm still taking this as an opportunity to learn, but honestly when my supervisor was like "Oh that's not your fault" it just immediately clicked in my head that I'm still internalizing my problems and blaming myself for things I really don't need to.
So stay vigilant out there folks! Not everything is your fault!
Why the hell am I back on here? I don’t wanna be back on here. I want stability. I don’t wanna feel this way. I don’t want these low points. I hate internalizing everything. It’s like I was programmed.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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all the strange strange ways we cope with hurt feelings.
no letting things go we internalize like men
