#inner reflections

Cal Kestis - Jedi Survivor

- A reflection of one's inner darkness

This wretched writhing within.

[one] [two] [three] [tw mentions of domestic violence] 

The water had sent her in a direction she hadn’t been-- by the current’s direction she could guess that she was a number of miles south of the recently taken Moonsong Outpost. This could have been wishful thinking, 

She had come to this direction after walking-- staggering through the tree, until she couldn’t move any longer. Shal’Khan took her onto his back and carried her, even further toward a destination that he was driven to purely by instinct.  “You did it..” “Shelter.” She gave a smug smile to nothing and shut her eyes. By now adrenaline had left her, and when she looked at her legs there were cuts and scrapes and..there was red. In the black and white-- grey scale of her vision, it was soft and it was muted. But she saw red. Her eyes shut and she was nearly to sleep when the voices returned. “Wake up.” “You need water.” “You’re going to bleed to death.”

There was good reason her family wore wraps over their feet and cresting to their knees. It made gripping tree’s easier and in the event of emergency. Bandages. As gash on her thigh was the worst, and she used a sizable amount of her left foot wrappings to cover it. The right foot was used to cover a section of her left wrist-- her link to the others was, at this point; likely compromised. “But isn’t that what you wanted?” “Yes,” she said, before her eyes shut.   

Tucked up under a lip of  the cliff,  It was another few hours of darkness before she could manage to wake up. . The harbor got heavy rain at least four days out of the week, making it’s muggy climate-- the island it was attached to was no different.

“You need water.”  “I know,” she told the voice, pushed up against the cliff-- staring at the rain. While it was raining she could stick her head out to drink. A stream was, at least in the backwards direction. She knew where to get water. “Food.” She answered the voice, she hoped was Svalte aloud. “Roots--fruit. We know which.. I know which ones.”

Two days and she was already losing her mind. Or more likely, losing it had been why she came here.  “You came here to die?” “No, she came here to find Her.” 

The first time she attempted to make contact with a Loa, her now-late husband had nearly beat her to death. A beaten body, he’d gotten what he wanted from her and she.. she met The Harbinger, who had ultimately led her to absolution and liberation from her lover. 

“But you continued the cycle.”  “I did.” “You will always love what cannot love you back. And if, by some miracle something does return your affections?”  “I run.” 

“You are searching for hurt.”  “Always.” She put her hand on Shal’Khan’s head, the saber listening patiently to her talk to herself, or to whatever voices had manifested out of her life-long search for something that would make her feel differently than she did right then. “Do you know what to do yet?”

She glanced to her arm to each black band over her forearm and wrist before she stood up. “Not yet,” she said, which meant her only answer was to keep moving. Further from home, from everyone that loved her-- if she had to cross to the island on foot, she would do it.

Take My Hand (Inner Reflections) - 01.10.2019