#initiation

I'm a highly spirited individual. I don't claim one faith, religion, or spirituality. I love learning and reaching out to new ideas and concepts.

Some of these include:

• Soul/ Spiritual Alchemy

• Deity Worship

• Reiki

• Tarot / Oracle / Rune

• Crystal Work

• Herbalism

• Kitchen Magicks

• Many More and Growing Every Day

How many times had he heard that? Alistair searched his mind and his memories, but came up empty. Always there was a reason for somebody being here, always there was something that they wanted from him to justify them spending time in his presence. And every time he'd be abandoned as soon as they'd gotten what they wanted or needed.

But Atreion… Atreion was choosing to spend their time with him simply for the benefit of his company. Because they liked him?

"You could be anywhere else," he started, though it wasn't accusatory. "Do anything else, be with anybody else." His eyes were wide with shock at this point, and he swallowed heavily as those words clung to the back of his throat with the weight of themselves. They weren't. They were anywhere else, without anybody else, doing anything else. They were here. "Yet you choose me," he finally finished.

Alistair is careful not to look too disappointed when she explains her role to him. She may just work the gardens, but he's learned not to overlook somebody just because they're not who he's looking for. He knows not to dismiss what somebody can tell him when he's not expecting it.

"Perhaps you would be able to help me," he tells her, and finds that he's hopeful she can. He doesn't exactly love the Necropolis creepy as it is, so the sooner he can leave the happier he'll be.

he was contemplative for a moment, considering the plight she found herself in.

"i have an idea of how you feel," he finally said, though the words were delicate, sympathetic. "sometimes when I'm trying to explain something about being a grey warden - what it means, what we do, what we stand for - and i can see that others just completely lose focus as i'm talking, like they're just waiting for me to finish. i used to think it was just me being my usual self, but i eventually realized… sometimes people just do it. not because they don't care, but because they don't have any way that they can understand it, i think. there's no way to hand them your experience in a way they can swallow."

He barked out a laugh in surprise, having not anticipated Myrna's comment at all. "You've thought about that, have you?" he asked, shaking his head in disbelief as he considered the possibility of him just letting loose on somebody and finally getting to yell again.

"I hate to disappoint you," he continued, "but I don't know that it will ever happen. I've become an absolute champion at not snapping." It was… technically a lie. He had his own limits and had reached them a couple of times in his life, but Teagan and Eamon had both drilled in his head the importance of maintaining proper decorum.

He wished he had the ability to just let loose sometimes, though at least it was less anger lately and more outright boredom. "If it ever happens though," he promised, "then I'll be sure to give you proper warning so that you can be there. The whole show - me in the throne room, telling everybody exactly what I think of them and everybody forced to listen."

He didn't expect Atreion to actually ask, and Alistair found himself blinking before he shrugged dismissively. He was lounged casually against them as they read a report and ran idle hands through his hair. Of course he'd been drawn to comment that he was surprised they'd even ever noticed him, but now he regretted it. "I don't know," he answered, looking up at them. "I mean - " he covered quickly - "I suppose I just… didn't think I was the sort of person you'd be looking at. You're you, you know, and I'm… I'm king, sure, but that never attracts the right sort of person. Usually this - " and he gestured to his whole self, which covered everything without being too terribly specific - "Has people either rolling their eyes or walking away as quick as they can."

Alistair opened his mouth to deny that there was anything that he wanted to say, but he snapped it shut just a moment afterwards. There was no reason for him to be lying, after all, especially since his question was actually rather innocuous, or at least he thought.

"Ah, well - I was going to ask something," he admitted. "And then I thought better of it, to be honest. But now I'm thinking better of thinking better of it." He offered a sheepish grin, self consciousness evident in the small shrug of his shoulders. "It's not terribly important, after all, I just - well, I don't have a lot of good experiences with visiting Tevinter."