How to edit characters (that already existed in your first draft
Maybe your character was too dull or too passive or maybe they’re just hella inconsistant. Anyhow, several of my characters fit all of the above in my first draft, but now they’re so much better, so here are some tips.Â
1) What are they SUPPOSED to be? What was your intention for the character when you started writing them? This is especially helpful when fixing inconsistant charactarization. Ignore situations where they have to act out of character to get the plot to work (I’ll get to that later). If that wasn’t an issue, what would this character be like? This is going to be like a compass - in each scene, they’re either going to act like this, or you can directly point to something they’re reacting to that would cause them to act different.Â
2) Create a character profile for them about their personality, strengths, weaknesses, goals, and motivations. Unless they’re visually inconsistant, you don’t need to worry about what they look like beyond the absolute basics (physical ability and/or race being things that likely impact their life in some way). For a guide on how I make character profiles, you can check out this post (imbedded). It’s pretty simple, and you can make some dynamic characters out of it.Â
(How to implement this information below the cut)
3) Their actual voice is something that comes to me a little bit later, but consider thinking about sentence constructions, slang, the tone of their voice, and all that jazz for each of your problematic characters.Â
4) Go through the story chapter by chapter. At least for the first pass, doing things linearly can help make sure you can take into account what’s already happened, and deal with ripple effects before they get too convoluted. In each scene, think about what they’re doing to achieve their goals, what they’ll notice, what mannarisms they’re likely to display, what goes into their decision making process, and what choices they actually make. Sometimes these choices can be problematic from a plot perspective if all you do is edit the character. In cases like these....
5) Cut off convenient escapes for your character. If they would not make the choice you need them to make on their own, give them a more compelling reason to do so. This can range, so be creative. Maybe they get blackmailed. Maybe a love interest influences their decisions. Maybe they think the easy route is a trap. The idea is to make them make the decisions you need them to without sacrificing their characterization.Â
6) Seriously I cannot emphasize enough how helpful it is to just go chapter by chapter, at least for your first pass. It’s so much more manageable, and it’s a lot easier to break down into bite sized chunks, and to create and track goals.Â
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Show Don’t Tell: an overdone topic that I’ve decided to beat yet farther into the ground :)
Honestly, this phrase has been regurgitated so many times that sometimes it feels like it’s begun to lose its meaning, but I’m opinionated about it (more than any sane person should ever be), so I’m going to plaster said opinions onto my blog. Enjoy!
So the first thing is that when a lot of newbie writers (past me is getting lumped in too) hear “Show don’t tell,” what they’re actually hearing is “tell, but with more words.” This is how you end up with phrases like “a small whoosh of air escapes her puffed cheeks, where it condenses into a little cloud, it’s presence a visual representation of her frustration” instead of “she huffs a sigh and shivers.” Both show that she’s frustrated or annoyed and that it’s cold out, but the first uses exactly four times as many words. Also, the first line was more telly than the second. I guess a key thing here is as much as you can, don’t “show” verbs by just saying them in a much more drawn out way. It has the opposite effect of what you’re usually going for.Â
The next thing is that Show Don’t Tell is most effective when it’s about characters. This is because characters are layered in a way inanimate objects aren’t; their actions can indicate more details below the surface, or can add up to portray convincing and consistant characterization. Describing a character’s room - the place where they can relax and be the most themselves - is showing us about the character. Saying “the curtains were ugly” is showing us about the characterization of the narrator, who is, most often, a character. If you’re talking about how a character is moving through an environment, you’re indicating temperature, feel, etc, but you’re also showing us how your character is reacting to that.Â
Say it with me people: it’s all about CHARACTERS!
(i told u i was opinionated)
Going into that a little farther, what Show Don’t Tell is really getting at is Demonstrate Don’t Tell. In other words, rather than blatantly tell us that a character is X over and over again, give us the evidence and let us put the pieces together. For example, saying that a character is heroic repeatedly makes them feel about as heroic as that soggy noodle on the cafeteria floor. But having the character save others instead of hirself on multiple occasions, especially when it would be much easier for hir to fit into the status quo looks pretty heroic. Or, if you have a character and you say over and over that xe’s really witty, but they never do anything witty, they’re going to look like a stagnant chunk of wood, humor-wise.Â
TL;DR: Show don’t tell does not mean replacing sentences with much more drawn out versions, especially if it’s about replacing verbs with their descriptions. Instead, it’s about creating characters based on evidence that’s consistent with who you say they are.
