#imliterallyjustsittinghere

Ted ain't got NOTHING on Mike. Steve thinks he's so boring. Like yeah Steve can charm him and Ted thinks he's a decent young man but Steve is rolling his eyes behind his back. He's making yawning faces at Mike behind Ted's back, mocking him as he speaks with a hand puppet.

Steve also tries to leave a room before Karen can trap him in conversation.

Steve: hey, it's not so bad. My team always gets beat up and stuff. Plus you met Suzie! Not even I have met Suzie! That's cool! And you met the... agent... guys?

Mike: the agent who we had the bury in the desert?

Steve: right okay but you met him didn't you. Just because he died doesn't mean you didn't meet him.

Mike: at least I didn't meet any demobats!

Part 2) Also, if Barb’s there Steve has backup that isn’t a middle schooler, AND potentially she could either go out by herself or with Steve and tell Billy to fuck off, Max is fine and Barb will drop her off later. Billy probably would still try to start a fight, but maybe he’d just leave? Especially if he never gets in the house/spots Lucas.

ohhh before the junk yard though Dustin is asking for girl advice and he's like "how'd you guys get together!" and Steve just blurts "I Fought the Demogorgon for her?" like they weren't basically dating before that. Barb laughs at him and tells Dustin that he was sweet and made her feel special, and that he makes her laugh. Steve says not to seem too eager even if you are and to back off when a girl tells you to.

At the junk yard Barb finds a small sledge hammer and is like hmm. this'll do nicely... and gives it a couple swings and Steve is sat there, ready to fight but also..fists clenched around his bat,, telling himself this is not the time to make out with her this is NOT the time there are evil dog things coming and also children but also oh god after her physio therapy for surviving the UD ended they've been working out together a bit and she's so strong she has a sledge hammer her hair has some flyaways it looks like she's on fire with the sunset around her and refracted through her glasses he's gonna drool someone help him...she just looks at him and is like "...you are so predictable, jeez" and bends down to give him a little peck and he is goo now, actually.

Also yeah idk what the writers are doing not acknowledging first aid training coming in handy. They made Steve a lifeguard! that means canonically he has Standard First Aid, (likely also a certification to teach CPR-C) and i wouldn't put it past him to do adventure medic and/or advanced first aid at the very least. They can be first aid buddies :)

Also I loooove giving Max a Cool Older Girl Friend. She deserves it. Steve and Barb are a package deal and she's like how did this absolute badass get with this dude who is kinda like a cat if the cat was raised by excitable dogs.

Ahhh for the Steve/billy fight idk...like that's such an important moment for his relationship with the kids...also it's funny because his presence could easily be explained by just. bending the truth. he's there because he lives close and is Nancy's boyfriend, and will had to go to the hospital while they were all hanging out, so unfortunately for mike his older sister's boyfirend was called to make sure they didn't freak out or burn the house down. At first glace it's suspicious but then after two seconds of thought it makes sense haha.

Maybe Barb goes out first to talk to Billy because they know seeing Steve will just rile him up (Billy's been looking for a fight with Steve since he came to town) and she tries to tell him that, yep. everything is fine. don't mind the broken window! She'll drive Max home nice and safe but the kids wanted to stay together to find out if Will was okay. And Billy is like oh...you mean those kids hanging around my sister? that Sinclair kid I told her not to hang around? and the kids still get spotted in the window, Billy pushes Barb down, and Steve steps between the door and the kids.

Billy sneers at him and spots Lucas and he still tells Max he breaks things and dives for Lucas, but Steve catches him and hauls him away from the kids. They still fight, but barb is there. But like. Ending a fistfight means putting yourself inbetween it or hauling someone off, and that's hard to do. But maybe they separate, and maybe it ends sooner, maybe Steve isn't quite as badly concussed, and Max still has his nailbat and swings it and Billy, telling him not to mess with her friends anymore, and Billy glares at all of them, but drives away. Steve puts a hand on Max's shoulder and she does not cry. Barb makes sure the other kids are okay, looks over Lucas who might be shaking a bit and hauls him into a hug. They get some bandaids for Steve's face (Max and Lucas are very serious about tending his wounds.) and all trudge through the woods a little ways to Steve's car to head for the tunnels.

Ooooo nice. Never Again We Two (title from my love my life by ABBA) is a oneshot from steve's mom's pov post s4 in which she finaly comes back to hawkinsto see her son when he's hospitalized, again, and sees the room filled with people she doesn't know or only knows vaguely.

When the nurse comes in, saying Steve's momis here, steve, groggy and on pain meds, tries to sit up, saying "ma?" only to see Mrs. Harrington and immediately correct himself to "mom", because, as I headcanon it, Mrs. Henderson took one look at steve after Dustin talking her ear off about is new cool older friend and immediately adopted him. He calls her ma because she asked him to, and Dustin (her literal child) does so it's not weird what are you talking about Robin.

But anyways his mother hears the "ma? -- Mom" switch and realizes that she's missed out on so much of her son's life that he literaly calls another woman Ma and thinks of her instead when told his mother is there. It's a lot of introspection and outsider pov of the party and her mourning the loss of the relationship she could have had with Steve, and coming to terms with wanting/needing to build a new one.

I answered about LBLGLEWB (god why do I love long ass titles so much...) in a different ask but I actually love that mess of a fic so much that I will give you another taste ;)

from choose violence asks

7. What character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because of how the fandom acts about them?

hmmmmmmm idk it's not hate but i don't like some fanon Nancy. People treat her like she's always correct and rational and reasonable and almost perfect when she isn't! and that's what I like and find interesting about her! She is a traumatized teenager, and she makes rash decisions that could hurt people she cares about, but she often makes them because she cares. She's kind of selfish, she's brave and determined and passionate, she absolutely hates being told she's wrong (especially if she is). Boiling her down to just being brave and also correct, or to just her stubborness and pride and the way she has and can hurt people is boring! why would you do that? and it's annoying to see it so often like uhg. why is this boring smarty pants girl here instead of nancy? there's a balance that must be found...

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

scoops troop especially robin and dustin or robin and erica or steve and erica. Like obvs i love stobin and I love steve and dustin and the erica and dustin dream team but the potential for sillies betwen robin and dustin! or Erica and Robin or Steve! let them bond!

also Holly Wheeler OG Steve stan is v cute and I wish there was more of them haha

23. ship you've unwillingly come around to?

Why is Chrissy there? I don’t know. Maybe this is a ‘Chrissy and Steve are cousins’ au and he called her over in the hopes that her presence would stop the Party from sneaking out to commit arson to save Will’s life. Maybe she actually got caught up in everything last year bc she tagged along with Steve when he went to apologize (probably another cousins au scenario). Maybe she saw Max skateboarding, thought it was cool, and started a conversation. (Part 3 incoming)

(3/3) Cheerleading is pretty hard, so if Max was either already aware of that or found out while talking/hanging out with Chrissy, I think it’s reasonable that Max might admire Chrissy, which could potentially result in Chrissy being asked to the junkyard (especially if Max didn’t buy Lucas’s story, which I don’t think she did).

oooh fascinated by Steve and Chrissy being sporty cousins who are basically siblings tho. Steve who calls Chrissy his "sister but actually my cousin but basically my sister" in his brain because she's maybe 7/8 months younger than him so was in the grade below but they grew up together and almost all the baby pictures have them together in matching outfits :') they saved worms together from the pavement after it rained. Chrissy put them in Steve's hair and he cried. (she did this many times) They sit beside each other at family gatherings and just much sly and cutting mean girl comments about their relatives to make the other laugh. Or make distressed faces at each other from across the table when grandpa Otis is getting drunk and ready to rant.

Chrissy who Steve called during his sad boy clean up his own mess hours and she was like "okay I'll drive you to the byers house? You got knocked around I'll drive please don't get in a wreck auntie Diane would kill me." and she waits in the car for him but then Shit Goes Down and there's lights flashing and Steve runs out, but he stops, and looks back. and then locks eyes with Chrissy, and runs back in. So she follows. And finds out monsters are real right beside her brother-cousin.

yeah okay I'm digging Chrissy and Steve cousins au but it HAS to be coupled with Chrissy lives au I can't do that to them. I can't make Steve try to clear Eddie's name while mourning the only family he's known loved him. (but GOD a Jason/steve confrontation in that au? where jason is like she was your family! and steve is like I know!! That's why you need to believe me that Eddie didn't do this! I want revenge just as much as you! oh god this is so sad no no Chrissy lives in harrington cousin au.)

Anyway but Yeah. I think, like. Billy just wanted to punch someone. I guess because Chrissy is a pretty and popular girl, he would at least hesitate in his itch for a fight. Billy doesn't respect women but he's savvy enough to get in with Tommy, Steve's former bestie, so he knows enough that Chrissy isn't someone he wants to be on the bad side of. So perhaps it would...slow down? the events? idk. I really do think once Billy saw Steve or Lucas he wasn't leaving without punching someone. She could try to convince him it was her in the window, if Steve had gone out first, and that might give the kids time to hide better, but Steve isn't leaving s2 without getting punched by Billy in place of Lucas. It's one of those "locked in the timeline" things for me. Sorry Steve :( at least sometimes you aren't knocked out completely.