#ilisi

⛄❄ Scandinavian name Christmas theme ❄⛄

Over the last 12 days we have posted our pick of Christmas themed names, but for 2018 we put a Scandinavian spin on things.

my mother sings lord have mercy. she wears glasses, she believes, she has moles on her neck & none of them shaped like jesus. she cooks red beans & rice for the potluck, she glares at me when i'm not singing. i fake it until she turns her eyes back up to the cross. i fake it for a while, for her. my mother sings lord, she stands up a little straighter, lord have mercy. while everyone else is praying i imagine she cries like i sometimes see her doing. i can't ask for mercy, i don't deserve it. & then she holds my hand, rubs my back, i hope she can't feel the bones there the way i think she might. she says nothing, squeezing my hand, gathering the tears with her thumb. lord have mercy. she leans into me, that woman's husband passed recently. she always puts it that way. when she stops forgiving me the world will end. if there isn't mercy for her i have no hope. when she believes in me & i keep breaking her heart a little at a time i know i don't deserve it but she keeps on anyway. universe please be reasonable with me.

Midnight Mass Blues