#ifdrabble

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2. the fury in your head

Max lets Chloe die, but the storm still comes.

She's in the lighthouse, screaming at it.

"Didn't you get what you wanted?! I did what you asked of me! Why is this happening? What more do you want from me?!"

The hurricane roars and Max wakes up. 

Chloe's arms engulf her in an instant, "It's okay. You're safe. We're in Seattle. I'm here."

Chloe never pushes her to share, she wants to spare her the pain. She imagines Max dreams about the innocent lives lost, the sorrow, the guilt.

But Max's nightmares are about one thing only: not choosing Chloe.

3. (finally see) what it means to be living

It takes them more than a year to find their footing, but it's bliss when it finally comes.

They get an apartment. Max goes back to school, and Chloe enrolls in an Associate in Computer Science program in community college.

They work most weekends, even though Ryan and Vanessa are helping them out. They even get a compensation from the Arcadia Bay Victims Relief Fund. Chloe calls it blood money. But they take it, because they need all the help they can get.

Still, their routine is hard. Seattle is always rainy. They study, they work, they get by. Together.

4. awake, dear heart…

They share a bed, so they technically sleep together, but they're not together. 

There are lingering touches, light kisses and even pecks on the lips, but they haven't done anything else. They haven't talked about it. They're both just so utterly afraid of messing up what they have.

Max finds a note in Chloe's pocket when she's doing laundry. It reads: My offer still stands. Call me? Erika xoxo. There's a phone number. She folds it and then leaves it on Chloe's nightstand.

When Chloe finds it, she doesn't say anything, but Max watches her throw it in the trash.

5. ...awake

"Chloe? You know you don't have to stay with me, right? You don't owe me anything."

It's Christmas Eve. 11 AM. They agreed to sleep in before they drive to Max's parents. 

Chloe immediately sits up on the bed and looks at her with so much concern you'd think Max's nose is bleeding.

"What the fuck? Where did that come from?"

Max grimaces, refrains the urge to cry, "It's just… sometimes… I wonder if—"

Chloe puts a finger over her lips, ever so gently. Then, she kisses her, deeply, intentionally. It's a statement.

When they part, Max wonders no more.

6. worship in the bedroom

They lie naked on a warm June morning, limbs intertwined, bodies sweating, hearts beating loudly.

"Damn, you're hardcore, Max," Chloe grins like an idiot.

"So I’ve been told," Max can't help a little proud smile.

They chuckle together, and enjoy the silence. It's not really silence – a Hozier song is coming from the speakers, and birds sing under their window.

"One of these days, Caulfield…" Chloe whispers absentmindedly.

"What?"

She doesn't answer. She pulls Max closer and replies only in her mind.

One of these days I'm gonna ask you to marry me. Not today, but one of these days.

7. (remember) to let her under your skin

They end up in New York because Max gets a scholarship there, thanks to her impressive portfolio. Her photos and her name are connected to Arcadia Bay and, painful as that is, it opens many doors for her. She wishes it wasn't like that, but… it's the blood money check situation all over again.

HBO did a documentary series, so everybody in class knows everything.

Well, not everything.

But they whisper — she hears words like survivor, so tragic, Jefferson...

It used to bother her. Yet, with each passing day coming home to Chloe, the pain seems to simply drift away.

8. the pleasure, the privilege is mine

It's Chloe's birthday.

Max plans the perfect party with their New York friends. They Skype Max's parents, David and Kate. Chloe drinks, laughs, cries. They eat cake. It's fun, and it ends with their apartment ruined.

Afterwards, they sit together on the couch, spent, heads touching.

"Thank you for today, babe," Chloe says softly as she looks at their intertwined hands. "For a girl that should be dead, turning 25 is kinda wild…"

Max gazes at her with sheer devotion, "I love you so much."

The smile that Chloe gives her might have the power to stop time, "I know."

9. this is now

After the pandemic (they'll always wonder if somewhere, someone was using some cursed, forbidden power), Chloe burns out. She quits her job as IT specialist in some big pharma company, and starts freelancing as a graphic designer. That year, Max hits 200k followers on Instagram. She signs a photobook deal. Chloe designs the cover. It's a wild success.

So Chloe spins Max in her arms one Friday afternoon, and blurts out, "Max, I think we're ready. We've been talking about it, let's just do it!"

Max laughs, nods.

They lock eyes, and yell it in unison, "Let's get a dog!"

10. ten years

Chloe's making spaghetti — her long, honey-blonde hair up in a messy bun, her arm tattoo covered in black ink. Max's watching her work, sitting at the kitchen island, playing with the white gold band in her ring finger. Deckard, their Labrador, sits at her feet.

They're talking about their day, complaining about shit, making plans.

There's three candles by the window: one for Rachel, one for Joyce, one for all the others. Today's the anniversary, but it doesn't get to them anymore.

Life's weird, thrilling, also boring at times. 

It's good too. 

They made it. And they will be okay.

THE END

author's notes:

Title from Emily Dickinson's 434:

To love thee Year by Year— May less appear Than sacrifice, and cease— However, dear, Forever might be short, I thought to show— And so I pieced it, with a flower, now.

Chapter 2 title: Spanish Sahara by Foals

Chapter 3 title: Fast Car by Tracy Chapman

Chapter 4 & 5 reference: “Awake, dear heart, awake. Thou hast slept well. Awake.” (Prospero, Act 1, Scene 2) —The Tempest by William Shakespeare

Chapter 6 title: Take Me To Church by Hozier

Chapter 7 title: Hey, Jude by The Beatles

Chapter 8 title: There Is A Light That Never Goes Out by The Smiths