#icramblings

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What?!?!?!  don't look at me like that!

I just had a tooth ripped out of the back of my face along with the root that made it live in the first place. The tissues that were abscessed and infected have been debrided and removed and now there's just a gaping bloody hole hangin out back there that just introduced itself as a new play toy for my tongue.  

Once again..what? Stop freakin' lookin' at me like that.

You know that tongues will always find the one sore spot or missing tooth hole in a mouth and poke at it.   KEEP YA HEAD'S OUT THE GUTTER KIDS! lol I do not want to take this damn percocet. I'm against it. I don't believe in it. But when I tell you that the fucking lawn gnome that always steals my socks because his mistress is the sock gnome and he'll do anything to make sure that she doesn't tell his wife who just so happens to be the hair tie gnome is in the back of my mouth poking at my bloody pulp of a jaw hole with his pointy lil' hat I am not kidding even a lil. Shit hurts. I need to take a somethin' and I'm pretty positive that the damn  percocet is the only thing that's gonna get me through the night. It's unfortunate. I hope it dies.

My only saving grace would be about 78 pickle backs from my very very favorite bartender at The Red Lion. I'd much rather deal with the alcohol fairy than the narcotic fairy. It's easier to kill at the end of the day when it's all used up and you've taken as much advantage of her as you can. 

Look the other way....

Lastly I would love a boyfriend that actually gives a shit enough to worry...be here and not coddle me....just lay in bed with me about 2 feet away and be perfectly content to watch me drool my saliva filled blood all over my face while I go into a narcotic coma. Don't pet me. Don't kiss me. Don't rub my back. Just take pics and laugh your balls off at the fact that your girl looks like a moron. But...don't cross the line and get too disrespectful. You can be a dick and still love me to the fullest. I'm just sayin...

So I want one of those.

Any out there?   I thought not.

On second thought I'll just take a package of fresh gauze to stuff in my jaw hole, my very very very favorite bartender from the Lion to come over and feed me a bottle of pickle juice and jameson for my beloved pickle backs, and a body pillow.