#hynotism

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Guaranteed to be so good you forgot it even existed!

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Come and read a little bit about Hypnotism in our newest blog post!

re: Craigslist Job Ad seeking Certified Hypnotherapist (we will train)

Dear Positive Changes Hypnosis Centers,

   I feel I'd be qualified for the position mainly because I love controlling people. Luv it. I'm probably the most non-conforntational manipulator of people around me, and we all know hypnotism's well-earned nickname as the "passive-aggressive roommate of western medicine." There was also this time my friend Graham wanted to quit smoking and he made me hold his cigarettes at a party and not give him any and I only gave him one but that was only after he gave me a dead arm.

   Above all else, I feel I'd make an excellent certified hypnotist because I wouldn't use these powers for evil. I imagine you've had to weed out several would-be bank robbers and presidential assassins, and I assure you that I will not employ my powers of persuasion for anything more severe than forcing others to love me unconditionally.

   In conclusion, I feel I'd be the perfect candidate for the position of certified hypnotherapist because of my stick-to-itiveness, my intense gaze, and my inability to be placed at the scene of the crime. Please find my resume attached. Any gaps in employment are actually just gaps in your memory. FROM BEING HYPNOTIZED. 

   Thank you for your time and consideration. Look into my eyes. You will give me the job.

Did that work?

Best Regards,

Jonathan Washington

Future Hypnotherapist, MD(?)