The mistletoe is, at first, hung obnoxiously in the middle of every doorway on the lowest sublevel of STAR Labs. It only appears after-hours, when all of Harryâs employees are gone, so he knows almost immediately who the culprit is. And as easy as it would be to just stand there and wait for Jay to come up with yet another creative way to steal a kiss, Harry feels like making him work for it this time.
So he avoids the mistletoe.
He also avoids kissing Jay on the lips for three days.
Which is easier said than done. Thereâs only so much coitus a guy can get from his significant other  without taking a moment to exchange a proper kiss or two. Nips on the neck and jawbone just rile them up; they never satisfy. Thankfully, though, Jay isnât stupid. The epiphany he gets when he cottons on to Harryâs silent battle shines like the light of a thousand suns in his eyes one frisky evening. It says, plain as day, âChallenge acceptedâ.
Jay ups his mistletoe game and suddenly itâs like playing War in his own home. Harry has to edge his way carefully around each corner, forever eyeing the ceiling for signs of greenery. He takes to carrying his blaster around whenever he wanders down to the Cortex, having been forced on more than one occasion to shoot down a fresh sprig placed well above his reach. Scares the hell out of Jesse one night, but sheâs learned well enough by now not to ask any questions. Sheâs at that wonderful age where she neither needs nor wants to know any of the details.
Harry starts getting bored with their game by the seventh day.
Or rather, Jay finally takes to rebuffing all of Harryâs advances with a smirk. He also only initiates any of his own advances by leaning in for a proper kiss. Harry gets the message loud and clear.
No kiss equates no fun time in the bedroom. Period.
By the ninth day, Harry decides to swallow his pride. When he sees a new sprig of mistletoe hanging in the middle of the Cortex, he walks directly under it and waits. But he doesnât wait long.
A hand curls coyly over his shoulder and spins him around.
Harry is subsequently dipped and kissed at just a tick below breakneck speed. Heâs consciously aware of the taste of peppermint before heâs straightened up again.
Hunter winks at him and runs away.
Harry can feel his blood boiling in his veins.
And Jay has no idea why he extends their dry run to New Years Eve.
~The End~
Merry Christmas to ~me...
(For my besties: @earth-2harrisonwells and @jaygarrickspeedgrampa)
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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: The Flash (TV 2014)
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Earth-2 Harrison Wells/Hunter Zolomon, Jay Garrick/Earth-2 Harrison Wells
Characters: Earth-2 Harrison Wells, Jay Garrick | Hunter Zolomon
Additional Tags: Minor Violence, minor language, spoilers up to "Running to Stand Still", (the season 2 midseason finale), Dubious Consent, Hate Sex
Summary:
In the dead of night, when the Cortex is empty and the festivities have finally drawn to an end, the devil comes for him.
(An AU insert that follows immediately after the season 2 midseason finale episode "Running to Stand Still")
If youâve been wondering what Iâve been up to lately, the answer, of course, is no good... ;)
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Who ismore likely to raise their voice? They both do, a little,although the only time either one of them really screams is in the bedroom. ;)Who threatens to leave but never actually does? Harry, of course.Who actually keeps their word and leaves? Neither one of them.Who trashes the house? Harry will sometimes knock stuff off the shelves,but nothing breakable, and he usually only does it when heâs annoyed, not mad (Andyes, heâs aware that people refer to him as âHarry the Catâ)Do either of them get physical? Not really. Harry might threaten Hunter alittle with his pulse rifle, but then he just stomps off to stew alone in acorner. How often do they argue/disagree? Harry obviously has a different moralbackground, so they quibble a lot. Somehow though they make it work.Who is the first to apologise? Hunter (because Harry is too stubborn).
Sex:
Who is ontop? Most often Hunter, naturally. ;)Who is on the bottom? Harry, but Hunter will let him top every once in awhile if the mood strikes him.Who has the strangest desires? Harry. And as long as Hunter is getting sex,heâll happily play along with anything.Any kinks? Not sure about Harry, but Hunter sometimes likes to blindfoldHarry and then take him apart slowly. Also, sex in the water is pretty hot.Trust me.Whoâs dominant in bed? You really have to ask? (Hunter)Is head ever in the equation? Hunter has a bit of an oral fixation, so he oftenlikes to warm up Harry for a long night of love making with a little bj. Or, ifHunter climaxes before Harry, heâll duck his head down and finish him off withhis mouth.If so, who is better at performing it? Hunter, for obvious reasons.Ever had sex in public? No. Harryâs beautiful body is for Hunterâs eyesonly.Who moans the most? They both get pretty noisy.Who leaves the most marks? Harry. You should see the claw marks heâs leaveson Hunterâs back and shoulders. (Too bad theyâre all healed by morningâŚ)Who screams the loudest? Harry. Once you find the right angle, he hasno hope of keeping it all in.Who is the more experienced of the two? Hunter. Harry is older but heâsbeen a recluse for most of his life. Hunterâs the one whoâs taken great care tolearn all the moves~~~Do they âfuckâ or âmake loveâ? Both ;)Rough or soft? Again, both. Depends on the mood.How long do they usually last? The time varies, but they can go all night.Is protection used? Only when Harry doesnât want too much of a mess to dealwith. Does it ever get boring? No, but theyâve had Iâm-horny-but-too-tired-for-anything-specialsex before, usually at the end of a very long day.Where is the strangest place theyâd have sex? The Cortex.Â
Family:
Do yourmuses plan on having children/or have children? Well,Jesse is definitely her fatherâs daughter.If so, how many children do your muses want/have? Harry has one already andIâm fine with that.Who is the favorite parent? Harry, until Jesse wants to do something hedoesnât approve of. Then sheâll enlist Hunterâs help.Who is the authoritative parent? Thatâs totally Harry.Who is more likely to allow the children to have a day off school? Jesse isan amazing student. And an adult. Itâs entirely her own decision to skipclasses.Who lets the children indulge in sweets and junk food when the other isnâtaround? Hunter.Who turns up to extra curricular activities to support theirchildren? Harry (too many people know what âthe Flashâ looks like, soHunter usually has to hang back in the shadows)Who goes to parent teacher interviews? Harry.Who spends the most time with the children? Harry spends almost every sparemoment he can with Jesse.Who gives their children âthe talkâ? Ha! Jesseâs a big girl. She knewall about that well before Harry could muster the courage to tell her.Who cleans up after the kids? Things usually only blow up for Jesse whensheâs experimenting in Harryâs lab, so he does.Who worries the most? Harry. Too much, Iâd say.Who are the children more likely to learn their first swear word from? Oh,she knows plenty alreadyâŚ
Affection:
Who likesto cuddle? Hunter. Heâs been starved of human affection eversince his mother died.Who is the little spoon? Harry.Who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places? Hunter. Who struggles to keep their hands to themself?  Definitely Hunter.How long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable? Harry isusually restless, so an hour is the longest heâs ever managed to lie still.Who gives the most kisses? Hunterâs literally kissed every inch of Harryâsbody on multiple occasions.What is their favourite non-sexual activity? Chess or fiddling in the lab.Where is their favourite place to cuddle? The bed.Who is more likely to playfully grope the other? Hunter.How often do they get time to themselves? Well, Harry is a busy man, soquite a bit.
Sleeping:
Whosnores? Theyâve both learned to sleep quietly.Do they share a bed or sleep separately? They share, of course.If they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart? Harryprefers to have his space, but Hunter will always drag him back into his armssometime during the night.Who talks in their sleep? Both a bit.What do they wear to bed? Lol, nothing.Are either of your muses insomniacs? Both are, but especially Harry.Can sleeping pills be found by the bedside? No.Do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side? Hunteris clingy.Who wakes up with bed hair? Both do.Who wakes up first? Harry.Who prepares breakfast in bed for the other? Hunter. He can whip somethingup in a minute.What is their favourite sleeping position? Theyâre both side-sleepers.Who hogs the sheets? Neither. Speedsters run hot, so the sheets are morelikely to get kicked down off the bed over the course of the night.Do they set an alarm each night? No. Both are naturally early risers.Can a television be found in their bedroom? Nope. Not when thereâs a muchbetter way to entertain themselves. ;)Who has nightmares? Both do, for obvious reasons.Who has ridiculous dreams? Also both.Who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed? Hunter. Heâs a restlesssleeper. Who makes the bed? Whichever one is last to rise.What time is bed time? Depends on how long the sex takes.Any routines/rituals before bed? Plenty of foreplay. Plenty of sex. ;)Whoâs the grumpiest when they wake up? Harry. Perpetually.
Work:
Whois the busiest? Both.Who rakes in the highest income? Definitely Harry.Are any of your muses unemployed? Hunter isâŚself-employed.Who takes the most sick days? Neither. Speedsters donât typically get sickand Harry doesnât know how to take time off.Who is more likely to turn up late to work? Neither.Who sucks up to their boss? Also neither.What are their jobs? Harry is the head of S.T.A.R. Labs and Hunter isâŚhardto explain.Who stresses the most? Harry, a thousand times over.Do your muses enjoy or despise their careers/occupations? They each lovetheir work.Are your muses financially stable? Hell yes.
Home:
Who doesthe washing? They rotate.Who takes out the trash? They also rotate.Who does the ironing? RotateâŚWho does the cooking? They both do, but Hunter is better at it.Who is more likely to burn the house down just trying? If you can properly followthe instructions for an experiment without killing anyone, then you can figureout a recipe. So, neither.Who is messier? Theyâre both clean freaks.Who leaves the toilet roll empty? Jesse.Who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor? Jesse.Who is the prankster around the house? Jesse (and then Hunter inretaliation).Who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere? Hunter, becausehe doesnât usually drive.Who mows the lawn? Hunter. Who answers the telephone? Harry.Who does the vacuuming? BothWho does the groceries? Harry again.Who takes the longest to shower? Harry, because he isnât a speedster.Who spends the most time in the bathroom? Same as above.
Miscellaneous:
Is moneya problem? Hell no.How many cars do they own? Surprisingly, Harry only owns one. Hunter doesnâtneed one.Do they own their home or do they rent? Harry owns his place, and Hunter isnomadic when he isnât chilling with Harry.Do they live near the coast or deep in the countryside? Central Citysuburbia, aw yeah.Do they live in the city or in the country? City slickers, both ofthem.Do they enjoy their surroundings? You have no idea how beautiful CentralCity is, do you?Whatâs their song? I donât think they have one?What do they do when theyâre away from each other? Work. Always.Where did they first meet? Harryâs office. ;)How did they first meet? Thatâs quite the story. Too long for here, Ithink.Who spends the most money when out shopping? Are we including shopping for labequipment, because that is definitely Harry.Whoâs more likely to flash their assets? Neither?Who finds it amusing when the other trips over? Hunter.Any mental issues? Hot damn, yes, both of themâŚWhoâs terrified of bugs? Jesse.Who kills the spiders around the house? Whoever finds them first.Their favourite place? S.T.A.R. Labs.Who pays the bills? Harry.Do they have any fears for their future? Nothing out of the norm.Whoâs more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner? Hunter.Who uses up all of the hot water? Harry.Whoâs the tallest? Hunter ;)Whoâs more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?Hunter. Drives Harry nuts, but oh well.Who wanders around in their underwear? Neither. They never can tell whenJesse is going to drop by for a surprise visitâŚWho sings the loudest when singing along to the radio? Hunter only listensto the news, and Harry will only listen to the news or classical music, soneither.What do they tease each other about? Horrible, horrible things. Trust me.Who is more likely to cringe at the otherâs fashion sense at times? Haveyou never seen them before? Theyâre both exceptionally well dressed men.Do they have mutual friends? Hahâno.Who crushed first? Hunter. Since the beginning of forever.Any alcohol or substance related problems? Hunter had a bit of a Velocityaddiction, but heâs learned his lesson now.Who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am? Hunter canât drink andHarry doesnât like letting his guard down, so neither.Who swears the most? Harry, but only when heâs working on something smallor cumbersome.