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Day 36 - March 19, 2028

I have a love/hate relationship with the call-out culture.  If someone does something wrong to you, should you take screen grabs and post them to the public?  If they've wrong you privately, without endangering the community, then I think you should keep it to yourself.  If they have wronged you and there's a good potential for them to endanger someone else in the community, then I agree to the calling out.

There's a lot of Grindr screen grabs being posted recently, most of which are just conversations with discriminatory and rude jerks.

Grindr is a hookup app, which means you are supposed to use it for the intended purpose of finding someone to have sex with.  Using it for networking or just to find friends always seemed strange to me.  I'm rarely on Grindr looking for an immediate hookup.  Honestly, that "right now" expression is never true because most of the time those "right now" guys tell me "in an hour" or "tomorrow."

One of the first things I tell guys on Grindr is that I'm not looking for that moment, unless I am, in which case they need to get to the point.  Seems like everyone hides something behind their Grindr profile, sometimes good, sometimes bad. I don't know if I'm sexually compatible with them until we get to chatting and exchange pics.

I really regret that Recon isn't a more popular hookup app where I live because most of the guys on Grindr are so vanilla that they can't even handle me with a harness, let alone full puppy gear. A hookup is supposed to be about the quick mutual enjoyment of getting off, and I enjoy being a puppy during those scenes.  I'd rather entertain my Bad Dragon for the night than be asked to take off my puppy gear during a random hookup.

People get upset when you say "no" to a hookup. Simple fact of the matter is that sometimes we are not sexually attracted to someone else, regardless if they are attracted to us. You take your ups and downs and you move on.  I get plenty of "nos" on Grindr.  

I've learned a bit about psychology for my day job.  One thing I've learned is that the reaction you have in one moment is immediately influenced by whatever happened to you in the PREVIOUS moment.  So if someone just pissed you off, it's more likely that you will react badly to the next person that talks to you.  This influences your point of view, your interest in someone, and what you say to them.  For example, someone might have just pissed you off because they said you were too thin, to fat, to muscular, to fem, to whatever.  Your immediate state of mine will influence how you react the next guy, and you might turn into a complete dick yourself even if you find that next guy attractive.

My only advice about Grindr it that, when someone tells you "no," just except that they are not interested, for their own reasons, and move on. There’s nothing wrong with you.

Maybe they are not a top.  Maybe they are not a bottom.  Maybe they do not think you are a match.  Maybe you remind them of their ex.  Maybe they’re having a bad day. Don’t make derogatory comments back at them when they deny you.

Also realize that, just because someone is gay, and the gay community seems to hump everything, doesn’t mean that someone will immediately want to hookup with you.

Lastly, just because someone is flirtatious, or dresses in a very provocative way, does not mean they are out for a hookup.

Now go have some fun and don't get insulted along the way,

This guy...  wow

I think this guy I'm talking too really really likes sex a lot.

He's looking for multiple guys to come over and fuck him raw.  

sounds hot, but just not in the mood.  lol

-goes onto hookup app-

-guy asks for me to come over-  

-20 miles away- 

HELL NO!

NOT DRIVING 20 MILES IN -20ºF FOR QUICK FUN!

NEVER!