#hello 2016

one year closer to death

I can’t even say 2016 began with a good start. I may have ended things with my toxic EXboyfriend in September of 2015.. but it wasn’t until March of 2016 when I finally stopped any and all contact with him. He broke me down so hard, I hated every cell of my being. I couldn’t hold a conversation with anyone else, let alone talk period. I felt like my dreams, everything I wanted and needed meant less than nothing. This year was the year I started to rebuild what that sad excuse for a man destroyed. I began to rebuild myself. I made time for my family. I started making friends. Nicole, my high school best friend came back into my life. I couldn’t be more thankful. We made plans, we set goals. We were on a mission to help each other get over our toxic ex’s. To help each other become the best versions of us we could. I started looking into schools. I knew the idea of what I wanted for myself and my future. Finally, for the first time in almost four years, I was putting myself first. Tequila became my best friend and savior. She was my therapist. My Meredith to my Callie. It became the answer to all of my problems. It feels amazing. It feels like the Fourth of July. I feel liberated. I’m free to make my own decisions, bad or good. I’m finally able to be me. Now, how the hell do I do that?

I’ve been off Tumblr for so long I don’t even recognize the new layout. My age isn't updated lol