#hedgebtch

there’s stars in your eyes. your body hurts. there’s stars in your eyes. (whose eyes are these? whose body is this? what the fuck, how hard did he hit you—?) how hard did he hit you? your head’s ringing. your throat burns. and your head, it’s screaming, now, and your throat aches, hurts. it’ll be black. you’re not sure where your dress is. how hard did he hit you....?

you’re confused and you’re dizzy. you can’t turn your head or turn over and or sit up. you just kind of feel glued to the floor, splayed like a mannequin of a doll shouldn’t be. no blood— blood’s always so warm— but your head feels worse. you’re floating and stinging at once. you wonder if your hair looks okay. one of your louboutins have snapped.

you just look up and your eyes are jewel green, and this girl’s are blue like cartier diamonds. you’re not sure if you’re shaking or crying or both, but you can’t get your bearings anywhere. (what hit you?) fuck.

“you’re insane.”

she’s insane. you always knew she was insane. (you’re not insane? come on, julia, how much shit have you eaten, drank— how many vaguely cultish groups? you’re insane, julia.)

panic spikes and curls inside your gut. it’s only tempered by a fluttering that’s a butterfly just flap flap flapping way up and into your throat. out your mouth. you don’t know. scary shit is normal when you’re a hedge.

she’s not asking you to take her hand. marina’s not a hand holder, not like that. this isn’t a sweet-voiced olive branch offering like her big blue eyes imply but do not let you infer. but she’s looking you in the face and saying fucking prove it. fucking prove it to me.

and you know what? you raise the glass, you look her in the face, you gulp it down, you drop the glass so it bounces but it doesn’t shatter. just lands hard and rolls against this plush leather booth. it tastes repulsive. you don’t even look away. it’s just blue on gold, all the way through.

she’s not a hand-holder. she’s not asking you to take her hand. she’s asking you to fight your way in. she’s asking you to prove it. prove it to her.

so you trust her. you do.

julia looks everywhere. everywhere. she can’t find anything, not anywhere. not-- fucking anywhere, even when she’s tearing through marina’s apartment. even when she’s practically hurling books and cramming herself into the corner of the couch, looking like the sun where it backlights that warm brown hair from those big, wide, city windows. julia looks for answers in every inch of the apartment. she digs her nails into exposed brick like there are secrets somewhere. anywhere. everywhere.

if she could pick the flat up and just flip it upside-down and maybe shake some things out, it would be perfect. a word. a spell. something, anything to find a way to... to slaughter him, to hurt him, anything to--

you don’t remember what his name is. maybe because he creeps you out and he leers a lot. it’s possible nobody taught him how to look at anyone but it’s also possible he’s a wealthy cis white male. you definitely figure it’s the second one.

and he really shouldn’t touch you, but he tries to take your shoulder to get your attention and you halfway fucking blackout when this wave of nothing you recognize at all just slams him and you’re standing there with a load of drywall and dust everywhere and business boy is on the floor.

and you’re basically shaking. your pupils are blown to fuck. you’re staring at the wall and wolf of wall street trying to look either less embarrassed or less like he’s in trouble for breaking the wall. —marina likes you better, and it’s more likely he did the stupid thing.

❛❛    you have   g o t   to be kidding me.    ❜❜    this multi-verse shit ?    it   definitely   has something out for her.    penny’s been replaced by some   fucking eunic  who won’t stop making doe eyes at   ––    julia,  of all people  ––   and now,   this.    kady has half a mind to storm out of there,  to refuse her help,  to refuse to   help them .

but redemption has run its course,   and she’s off to find some higher purpose,   something  other  than living in spite of circumstance.    kady had given them her word,   and in this new life,   that means something.   it has to.    her nostrils flare, and through gritted teeth,  she speaks. 

❛❛    what do  you   want,   marina ?    ❜❜ 

  i’m literally an inverse tumblr rper. i come here...

you are the superhero to my supervillain