#hatefucking

Knock knock knock, rapped Thaisha at Julien’s door, impatiently waiting for him to answer.

She didn’t hear any movement on the other side of the door, and was about to knock again when it suddenly swung open to a half-dressed Julien. His toned stomach on full display.

“Oh, Thaisha. Is something wrong?” he asked, a puzzled look on his face.

“And hello to you too, Julien,” she replied cooly, making an arduous effort to keep looking into his face, and nowhere else. “No, nothing’s wrong, but a little birdie told me that you have some bottles of wine in your room.” She gave him an overly sweet smile, “And I was hoping I could snag one of them.”

For a moment, Julien did nothing but stare at Thaisha, a blank look on his face. Eventually, he let out an exacerbated sigh, as if this was the most inconvenient thing that had ever been asked of him. “Fine.”

He turned back into the room, with Thaisha following after him, shutting the door behind her. He looked over his shoulder and gave her a mild look of annoyance, but didn’t say anything about her coming in uninvited. 

“Any preferences? Type? Amount?” he asked.

“Whatever will get me drunk for the night,” she answered.

Julien gave her a grunt of acknowledgement and opened a drawer in the wardrobe to rifle through. Thaisha could hear the clang of multiple bottles.

While she waited for him to pick something for her, she gazed around his room. It was as generic as hers, softly lit, a large bed against the wall in the middle of the room, two nightstands, a wardrobe, and a low set table with matching chairs in front of an unlit fireplace. Thaisha noted that Julien had his belongings set up so that they could be gathered up in a moment’s notice. She wondered if that was a result of his training, or if it was a more recent habit.

“Here,” said Julien, pulling her from her thoughts. He was holding out a bottle to her. “This is the best I can do. I believe I already drank what you would really want.”

“Thank you,” said Thaisha. She pulled a knife from her pocket and started working at the cork. She pointedly ignored him when Julien sighed at her in obvious irritation.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” he said after another brief moment of Thaisha fiddling with the cork. He stormed over to the still open drawer and procured a corkscrew, before stomping back to Thaisha and snatching the bottle from her hands. After a few turns of his wrist and a light pull, he held the now opened bottle back to her.

“Anything else?” he asked, gritting his teeth.

Taking the bottle from him, Thaisha put her knife back into her pocket and took a deep swig from it, letting out a deep exhale of appreciation. Julien continued to glower at her.

“Why the rush to get rid of me, Julien?” She waggled her eyebrows at him, “Got a hot date coming over?”

“No,” he said curtly. “I was actually looking forward to a quiet night alone.” Julien moved to pull another bottle from the drawer, his way of telling her what his actual plans for the evening were. He was mumbling under his breath, his tone sounding pained.  

Thaisha didn’t catch anything he said, but the hurt that bled through in his voice was enough to give her pause.

She took a step towards him, reaching a hand out to his shoulder. “Hey, Julien,” she said in a tone she hadn’t used with him since the night of the Palazzo massacre.

As soon as she touched him, he jerked away as if her touch burned, and made a noise of disgust as he stood back up. “Well, you got what you came for, why don’t you leave already?”

Thaisha fought to keep her temper in check. “Fucking hell, Julien. I try to show you the barest amount of kindness, and all you do is throw it back in my face.”

“I do not need your fucking pity,” he spat back.

“It’s not pity. it’s concern.”

“Concern?” He let out a bark of laughter. “When have you ever been concerned about me?”

“Since you began training my son,” she squared her shoulders back, refusing to back down. “Since I saw your whole fucking life get torn apart in in a single night.” She took a step towards him. “Since I walked into a fucking blade for you.”

“Oh please,” scoffed Julien. “You only did that so I wouldn’t hurt your precious Occtis.”

It didn’t escape Thaisha’s notice that he ignored all the other points she had brought up.

“If I’d only wanted to stop you, I could have just Thunderwaved your ass. Or grappled you with vines.” She cocked an eyebrow at him, daring him to argue otherwise.

Julien opened his mouth to say something, but quickly closed it again. Thaisha couldn’t help but give a slight smirk at having rendered him speechless for once.

“Sure. Fine. You showed me the slightest bit of concern on the worst fucking night of my life.” He gestured to the door. “If that is all, I would like you to please leave now.”

“No,” said Thaisha simply.

“No?” repeated Julien, his voice rising. He looked like he was all but ready to shove Thaisha out the door.

“No, because that’s not all.” Thaisha took another swig of wine before speaking again. “I care about you, Julien. Yeah, I don’t particularly like you. I can barely fucking stand you most of the time, but I—”

Thaisha didn’t get to finish that sentence because Julien was suddenly upon her, his lips smashed into hers, his hands cupping her face to pull her down to him.

Heat pooled in her belly as Julien’s lips pressed deeper into hers, her heart picked up speed when he gave an expert flick of his tongue against her lips, gaining entry to the rest of her mouth. He let out a soft moan, which Thaisha couldn’t help close her eyes at the sound of.

It occurred to Thaisha that Julien was probably standing on tip toe right now, considering their height difference. A fact she probably would have found funny if she had been able find anything funny right now.

After what felt like an eternity, but couldn’t have been more than a minute, Julien gave one final, playful lick into her mouth before parting from her, a self-satisfied smirk on his face. Thaisha had to fight back the urge to chase after him, her lips tingling.

“My apologies for that,” said Julien, stepping back, his voice smug. The fact the apology came from him so easily, was more than enough proof that he wasn’t sorry in the least bit. “It was the only way I could think of to get you to stop speaking.”

Before she could stop herself, Thaisha reared her hand back and slapped him across the face. The sound of her hand connecting with his cheek seemed to reverberate throughout the room, only to be proceeded by a heavy silence. 

The hit wasn’t as strong as it could have been, as her dominant hand was still holding the bottle of wine, but it had been enough to wipe the smirk of Julien’s face, much to Thaisha’s relief.

For a brief moment, she considered smashing the bottle across his face, but ultimately decided against it. Both because it would have been a waste of perfectly good wine, and because she really didn’t want to him to have to explain an injury like that to the rest of the group.

“What the fuck, Julien!?” she hissed at him

She studied his face as if she would find an explanation written there. Unfortunately, all she saw was his cheek reddening from where she’d struck him.

“As I previously said,” he began, his voice nonchalant. He absentmindedly rubbed his thumb across his cheek.

Thaisha slammed the bottle of wine on the table with such force she was a little surprised the bottle hadn’t shattered. The metal plates in her spine burning hot as she shoved Julien back until they both slammed against the wall. 

She didn’t remember retrieving it, but she had her knife in her hand, and was holding it to Julien’s throat. It pleased her to no end when she saw his eyes widen at the feel of the metal against his skin. Though he quickly schooled his features again, a look of disinterest covering up whatever he might actually be feeling.

They both knew she wouldn’t actually hurt him. If anything, Thaisha knew it wouldn’t even take Julien that much effort to reverse their positions. A fact that only infuriated her all the more.

“Thaisha...” said Julien, he had raised his hands by his head in mock appeasement. “Is this really necessary? I didn’t think you were the type to get so worked up over a little kiss,” he said, sounding more amused than anything.

Thaisha knew he was right, but it wasn’t just the kiss that had her so incensed.

It was the heat that was pooled in her belly, her racing heart, the way her skin felt ignited where he had held her. The way she was struggling to keep from licking her lips so she could hold onto the lingering taste of him.

Thaisha pressed the flat of the knife harder against his skin.

“Look, Thaisha,” started Julien, actually sounding contrite. “I apologize that I have upset you this much. It was not my intention.” He gestured to the blade she still held against his neck. “Do you think you could put this away?”

There was a long moment between Thaisha nodding her head and her actually pocketing the weapon again.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Julien made to step away, but Thaisha only slammed him back. She dug her nails into his shoulders almost hard enough to break the skin.

“Oh no, I’m not finished with you yet,” she said, her tone menacing. “What are you playing at Julien? You think kissing me to get me to stop talking is a normal fucking thing to do?” She pressed him harder into the wall, her entire body flush with his. “So, I’m gonna ask you again. What. The. Actual. Fuck?” she demanded, her teeth bared.

“Well, along with the benefit you quieting you, I honestly thought you would have enjoyed it,” he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world, that damn smirk back on his face.

“What!?” Thaisha all but yelled in response. 

Julien continued to look unfazed. “I’ve seen the way you look at me, when you think I am not paying attention to you.” He licked his lips, which Thaisha chided herself for even noticing.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” she hissed when he didn’t continue.

 ”You know,” he grazed her wrist with his fingers, “like you wish to devour me.”

Thaisha felt her eyes widen. 

Fuck. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck.  

FUCK.

Had she been? She wanted to say she hadn’t, except she really couldn’t say for certain, could she? Julien was attractive, she wouldn’t deny that, but had she really been wearing that thought so blatantly on her face? 

She narrowed her eyes in suspicion, of course there was also the possibility he was pulling this out of his ass. He was the type who would walk around assuming that everyone lusted after him.

“Might I make a suggestion?” asked Julien, cutting into Thaisha’s thoughts. “You were planning on spending the night getting drunk? Yes? I planned on doing the same. But what if we spent tonight occupying ourselves with something else?” He licked his lips, and it didn’t escape Thaisha’s notice he seemed to be looking directly at hers. “We’re both adults. Nothing we do has to mean anything,” he finished in a whisper, his hand delicately stroking her hand. His meaning more than clear enough.

Thaisha stared down at him for a moment, trying to think, but her mind only kept circling back to that moment when Julien’s lips had been on hers, and the way her body had come alive under his touch.

“Nothing we do has to mean anything,” she repeated in a whisper, more to herself than to him. She carded a hand through his hair and pulled him in for a searing kiss.

Julien’s eyes widened in shock for a split second as Thaisha picked up where he had left off, a small noise of surprise escaping him as she parted his lips with her tongue. Thaisha couldn’t help smiling, just a little, gratified that she had been able to catch Julien off guard. After only a brief hesitation, Julien was returning Thaisha’s kiss with as much fervor as she was giving. Thaisha could feel the metal in her back cooling as they explored each other’s mouths, falling deeper and deeper into each other.

Julien’s hands had found their way to Thaisha’s sides where they held her fiercely; she struggled not to melt into his touch.

“Fuck, Thaisha,” Julien growled into her neck, his need for air finally outweighing his desire to keep going.

Thaisha moaned in response and was palming him through his pants, appreciating the hard thick feel of him, when an unpleasant thought crossed her mind.

Pulling back from him, she cupped his cheek, her thumb brushing at his bottom lip, as she forced him to look up at her. “You know your way around tusks,” Thaisha observed, her tone ominous. She eyed him suspiciously, and could feel the metal in her back threatening to heat up again.

Julien let out a low chuckle at that. “Don’t worry,” he said, placing his hand over hers, a sly grin dancing on his lips. “No one you know.”

Thaisha said nothing in reply, deciding that was enough explanation for her. Instead, she recaptured his lips for another bruising kiss, shutting out all thoughts except for how good he was making her feel.

She tugged at the laces holding his pants closed, loosening them just enough to get her hand in. She gave him a firm squeeze at the base of his erect cock, eliciting a deep groan from him that rumbled through his chest.

As Thaisha slowly dragged her hand down the hard length of him, Julien groped at her breasts, her robes shoved to the side.

Thaisha had just begun to let herself get lost in the touch and feel of him, when Julien began to suck at her neck.

“No, don’t,” she said, her voice raspy. 

“Hm? What?” His hands dropped back to her waist as he moved to search her face, his eyes full of an uncharacteristic apprehension. “Don’t what?”

“No marks,” answered Thaisha, her voice softer now.

“Right, of course. I should have assumed,” Julien whispered back. “But you should know,” he placed her hand on his collar bone, and before she could stop him, dragged her nails down his chest, leaving bright red trails in their wake. “I have no such reservations.”

“No, Julien, I mean,” she took her hand from his, and carded it through his hair, her voice firm but gentle. “No marks on either of us.”

“But I don’t—Oh.” A look of realization crossed his face. “You don’t want the others to know.” His tone was unreadable.

She nodded her head in confirmation, worried that if she spoke, he’d somehow know that she was lying. That there was a different reason she didn’t want any evidence of what they were doing.

Julien looked down at his chest, at the scratches that seemed to be getting redder by the second. “Well, no matter. These will be easy enough for me to hide,” he said, his tone noticeably casual. He wrapped his arms around Thaisha’s waist, holding her to him. “Is that all?” he asked.

Thaisha brushed the back of her hand down Julien’s cheek, the one she had struck earlier. “For now,” she replied as she breathed an internal sigh of relief; grateful she wouldn’t have to explain the real reason she didn’t want any evidence of what they were doing. That it wasn’t judgement from the others that she feared, but her own.

She didn’t want any evidence of this night on her. Not from a man she could barely stand. A man who was with one of the most arrogant, infuriating, and reckless people she had ever met.

A man, who, despite it all, she couldn’t bear the thought of not touching right now.

Thaisha began kissing her way down his chest, pressing the curve of her tusks into him as she went. She pulled his pants partway down his thighs, freeing his cock as she lowered herself to her knees.

“Can I put my hands in your hair?” asked Julien, his eyes searching her face.

“On my shoulders,” she replied after a moment’s hesitation.

Though her first instinct had been to say yes, Thaisha had decided that letting him run his fingers through her hair would feel too intimate between them.

Sure, they’d been making out like a pair of horny teenagers, and she was about to have his dick in her mouth, but she had to draw the line somewhere. 

Julien didn’t hesitate to place them there, his touch almost delicate, looking at her like he didn’t fully believe she was real.

Doing her best to block out his intense gaze, she took him into her hand and swiped her thumb across the head of his cock, spreading the pre-cum that was already gathered there. Julien let out a shuddering breath, and tipped his head back, a breathy groan escaping his mouth.

Feeling a bit more at ease now that he wasn’t watching her so closely, Thaisha licked the length of him, from tip to base, stopping just before the course hair that covered him. She almost didn’t believe it when she heard him let out an actual fucking whimper.

Without any further preamble, she took the head of his cock into her mouth, sealing her lips around him as she began to suck.

Julien’s fingers dug into her as he let out a strangled moan, while Thaisha slowly moved further up the length of him, taking him deeper with every bob of her head.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, Thaisha,” he gasped when she had taken him into her throat. 

She relaxed her jaw and moaned in response, drawing out another series of expletives from him. His thighs shook with tension as she took him in further, before she eased off of him till just the head remained. She swirled her tongue over it and hollowed out her cheeks, resulting in Julien to giving a sudden thrust of his hips. Thaisha made a choked noise of surprise, and had to dig her fingers into his hips in order to keep him against the wall. 

She shot him a warning glare.

“Fuck, fuck. I’ll be still, I’ll be still,” he said, his voice coming out in a shuddering whisper, desperate to appease her.

Taking pity on him, Thaisha took him into her throat and moaned again, knowing the response it would get out of him.

It was beginning to frustrate with her how much she wanted to hear his desperate noises, while also hating that it was him that she was hearing.

Thaisha tried to forget who she was with, but everything was just so, Julien. From the noises he made and the sound of his voice. To the strength of his body under her hands. The hot, musky taste of him on her tongue. Right down to the scent of him, of good wine and spicy cologne. All of it kept clawing its way into her brain, refusing to let her forget who she was with right now.  

It was driving her out of fucking mind.

“Hey,” she said, pulling off of him, her voice rough.

“Yes? What? What do you need?” he asked between gasps as he looked at her, his eyes wild with desire and desperation.

“I need,” she hesitated. There really wasn’t much he could do about what was bothering her, except maybe one thing. “For you to stop talking.”

Julien furrowed his brown in confusion, but acceded her demand with a nod of his head. If he was bothered at all by bother it, he didn’t let it show.

She took him into her mouth once again, and began stroking herself through her clothes, vexed at how wet she was getting from this.

She took in as much of him as was comfortable, and used her hand to cover the rest of him, softly twisting in tandem as she continued to lave and suck him down. 

As she brought Julien closer to the edge, he struggled to keep it together, each breath coming out quicker than the last, his thighs twitching and shaking uncontrollably. His groans coming out higher and higher pitched, till he was practically keening. 

His release was marked by a muffled shout and him slamming back into the wall to keep from crumbling onto her.

Thaisha kept at him as he shook and sputtered, swallowing his spend down until it was done with.

As he began to soften, Thaisha finally pulled off, wiping at her mouth with a piece of her cape. 

Julien kept his hands on Thaisha’s shoulders, using her to prop himself up against the wall as he struggled to catch his breath.

When his breathing had returned to almost normal, Thaisha gave a light shake of his knee until she caught his eye. “Do you think you’ll be able to get it up again? Soon?” she asked, nudging his cock with her knuckle. 

He gave a small but sharp wince, still sensitive, and opened his mouth to reply, but quickly shut it again, and nodded his head instead.

“Good,” was all she said to that and moved to stand up, when Julien stopped her, his hands on either side of her face. He lightly stroked her cheeks as he leaned down towards her and captured her lips with his, letting out an appreciative moan as he kissed her.

He helped her up to her feet and gestured for Thaisha to go to the bed. Right as she was about to climb onto it, she felt Julien firmly grab her by the wrist, turning her to face him. He gave her a light shove, so that she was sitting on the foot of the bed, and began pulling at her robes, trying to get them off of her. 

Thaisha noted that he had shed what little clothing he’d had on, and was now completely naked.

“Here, let me,” said Thaisha, as she began to strip her clothes, dropping them onto the floor as they came off.

Julien kissed along her neck and jaw, and pawed at her, more of a hindrance than anything, which Thaisha couldn’t help but find funny.

“Julien, Julien, give me a damn second,” she said through quiet laughter.

He stepped back, his arms crossed, indignation written all over his face and body. Thaisha couldn’t help but laugh more, the task of removing her clothes momentarily forgotten. She didn’t think she’d ever seen someone look so righteously irate while also completely naked.

Julien let out an irritated huff, and began to tug at her pants, evidently fed up with her dilly-dallying. He pulled them down and off her ankles as Thaisha continued to laugh and make slow work of removing the rest of her clothing.

“You’re cute when we’re mad,” she said as he kneeled before her on the floor, the both of the now completely naked. She gave a playful pinch of his cheek, and was surprised the most resistance he offered was a slight grimace.

As Thaisha pulled her hand away, Julien grasped the backs of her knees, and hoisted her legs over his shoulders, and pulled her to the very edge of the bed. His arms wrapped firmly around her thighs, holding her to him. He took his time nosing through the thick thatch of curls between her legs, seemingly trying to breathe her in as much as he could. 

Thaisha could only watch him, her hands clutching at the blanket underneath her, hardly breathing in anticipation.

His mouth ghosted over her, only giving soft teasing licks to her folds, which Thaisha found maddening. She had been about to admonish him for it, when he finally entered her with his tongue, his way made easy by how wet she already was. Thaisha couldn’t help but groan as he quickly picked up speed, eating her out like a man half-starved.

She fell back on the bed, lost in the pleasure of his tongue inside of her, moaning with every movement he made. His strong hold on her thighs the only thing keeping her from clamping down on his head.

Without warning, Julien withdrew his tongue from her, and enveloped her clit with his lips, switching between firmly licking and sucking at it like his life depended on it. 

It was all Thaisha could do to hold on, overwhelmed by the pleasure he was giving her, At some point, and without even realizing it, her hands had become tangled in Julien’s hair, gripping and pulling at him as she became almost entirely overwhelmed.

“Fuck, Julien, fuck,” was the only thing she could manage to say between moans as he went back and forth between her clit and her cunt. Each time he would bring her ever closer to the edge, but always backing off right as she could feel herself getting close.

“Julien,” she gasped out, giving a harsh tug of his hair. She could feel herself getting close once more, and couldn’t bear the thought of him denying her yet again. “Julien, please,” she pleaded when he gave no indication he had heard her. 

She was about to try again, when he pulled back from her, his lips and chin wet and obscene with her arousal. He gave her a curt nod, before he clasped his lips around her clit once more, his eyes gazing intently back into hers.

Thaisha could have wept with relief, but instead, she tipped her head back, and closed her eyes, moaning without restraint as Julien finally brought her to completion. 

Her heals dug into his back while her hips bucked against his relentless mouth, keening and gasping with abandon as he entered her cunt with his tongue once more now that she was well and truly over the edge.

“Fucking hell,” said Thaisha, her voice barely above a whisper as she settled back down on the bed when the waves of pleasure had finally come to an end.

Julien began to gently lap at her, evidently still not satisfied, and was only brought to a stop when Thaisha tugged his mouth away from her.

He released his hold on her thighs, letting them fall to either side of him, and moved to rest his head on her stomach, his fingertips tracing mindless patterns into her hip. Thaisha thought she could feel Julien’s eyes on her as they both lay in the stillness.

Rather than remove her hands from his hair, Thaisha found herself combing her fingers through it, enjoying the soft feel of his thick curls. She let out a deep sigh, enjoying how content she felt.

Eventually, and with monumental effort, Thaisha lifted her head up to look down at Julien, to find that he was definitely staring at her. His lips and chin still wet, having not bothered to wipe Thaisha’s arousal away.

He flicked his tongue at her, a question in his eyes. In her blissed-out state, it took Thaisha a moment to figure out he was asking if she wanted more.

Thaisha looked at back at him, thinking.

She wiped his face dry with a piece of blanket, followed giving his hair a slight tug. “Come up here,” she whispered, taking care to avoid saying Julien’s name. 

Julien gave an open-mouthed kiss to each hip before lifting off of her. Now freed from his weight, Thaisha made the strenuous effort of pulling herself further up the bed, only stopping when her head came to rest on a pillow. 

Julien crawled after her, planting light kisses up her legs and stomach as he did so. He stopped when he came to her breasts, taking one in each hand, palming them gently. He buried his face in between them, and let out a deep groan. 

Thaisha exhaled in response, twisting her fingers in his hair once again as he began kissing her breasts, the both of them losing themselves in the touch and pull of the other.

“This shouldn’t feel this fucking good,” mumbled Thaisha, resenting how perfectly his body seemed to align with hers. She rubbed at his back, enjoying the ripples of his muscles as he moved above her.

Julien seemed to huff in agreement, and began to kiss his way up her neck and along her jaw, and cupped her between her legs. Thaisha let out a breathy moan when he slipped two fingers inside of her and made a come-hither motion, the heel of his palm rubbing into her clit at the same time. Thaisha bit into her bottom lip as he sent sparks of pleasure through her body, her nails digging into his back as she closed her eyes in ecstasy. With his other hand he tenderly cupped her cheek, pulling her in for a kiss that felt almost reverent.

Thaisha broke the kiss with slight shake of her head. “Are you hard again, yet?” she asked, hoping to distract him.

Julien looked like he wanted to say something, but instead only let out a groan when Thaisha took hold of him, relieved to find that he was indeed hard again.

Without further prompting, Julien adjusted his position, so that he was right up against Thaisha’s entrance, her face cradled between his hands as he looked at her with such unrestrained devotion that Thaisha had to close her eyes to escape it

There was a moment’s hesitation before Julien finally entered her, the both of them moaning in unison as he moved deeper inside of her. She wrapped her legs around his hips, and once again ran her fingers through his hair, all while he peppered her face in soft kisses.

His thrusts started off slow and measured, but they soon became more frantic and hurried, only slowing down again when Julien found that spot in Thaisha that had her gasping. Though her eyes were closed, she could feel Julien give her a wicked grin as he moved to grind into that spot, sucking at her bottom lip as she let out a litany of moans.

He reached a down hand between them and began rubbing her clit in time with his movements.

Much to Thaisha’s frustration, right as she was starting to get close again, he eased off her, removing his hand and slowing his movements to a complete stop.

Thaisha opened her eyes, ready to rip Julien a new one, when he suddenly spoke.

“Thaisha,” he whispered. “Can I ask you a question?”

If looks could kill, Julien would have been vapor, but as usual, he was unbothered by her obvious frustration with him.

“Well, you told me to not speak.” He cocked his head to the side in faux innocence as she glared at him. “And far be it from me to disobey a direct order.”

“What, Julien?” Thaisha snapped, more impatient than she would have liked. He was winding her up, and they both knew it.

“Do you care if I release inside of you?”

Thaisha couldn’t help but roll her eyes at him. “No, I don’t care. Go right ahead.” She wanted him to get moving again already, more than she was willing to admit.

“Are you sure?” he asked, he lightly brushed his fingers across her stomach. “Because I—”

“Julien. It’s fine. Believe me. You don’t need to worry about anything.” Thaisha replied, her impatience getting the better of her. “Trust me, the last thing I would ever risk is having a child that could be anything like you.” 

As soon as those words left her mouth, she regretted them. They felt too far, even for the two of them, but before she could take them back, Julien snickered.

“Yes, I should have realized,” he said, giving her a sardonic smile. “You having to put up with one of me is burden enough as it is.”

Thaisha didn’t get the chance to think of a response to that, because Julien soon began moving again, his hand once again between them and rubbing circles into her clit, cutting off anything Thaisha could have said with a moan.

Thaisha closed her eyes, trying to push down the guilt and worry she felt towards him. After all, she had tried to speak to him earlier, and it had been like speaking to a brick wall. A brick wall that knew how to get under her skin as easily as breathing.

Before Thaisha knew it, Julien had once again brought her to the edge. This time though, as soon as she felt him start to ease his off of her, she grabbed his wrist hard enough to bruise

“Don’t you fucking dare,” she growled.

Julien let out a low chuckle and obeyed, picking up the pace as Thaisha kept an iron grip on him, her eyes closed as she focused on chasing her release.

“Fuck, Julien. Julien!” Thaisha could hear herself groaning, as she moved to meet his thrusts.

“Yes, Thaisha, I know, I know. I have you,” he gasped, sounding almost as desperate as she did. He repositioned himself so that he was on his knees, with an arm around Thaisha’s waist, lifting her to meet his thrusts, as his other hand continued at her clit. 

Thaisha came with a prolonged groan as her back arched and her legs clamped around him like a vice, making it all but impossible for him to move. Julien’s own release was not far behind, his legs giving out from under him as he spilled inside of her. He let out a loud moan, muffled only by him burying his face into Thaisha’s chest.

Slowly, when the only sounds in the room were their quiet gasps, and after the last of the aftershocks of pleasure had faded, they relaxed their holds on each other.

Thaisha opened her eyes to see that Julien was, again, staring into her face.

“Quit staring at me, creep,” she mumbled through her haggard breaths, and lightly pushed his face away.

Julien merely chuckled and nestled into her touch, kissing the palm of her hand as he let out a dreamy sigh.

Thaisha tried not to read too much into Julien’s seemingly tender display of affection, instead opting to push at his shoulder, hoping it was enough indication for him to get off of her.

With an exhale that almost sounded reluctant, Julien did just that, pulling out of her with more care than Thaisha would have thought necessary. The evidence of his release spilling out of her as he did so.

As Julien rolled off her, he interlocked his fingers with hers, pulling her hand to his lips so that he could kiss the back of it, his eyes never leaving hers.

“You’re welcome to stay, if you want,” Julien said, his lips now pressed to Thaisha wrist. Thaisha must have given him a look because Julien gave a half shrug, as he brushed his fingers up and down her forearm. “I have never been one for kicking someone out of my bed.” 

Thaisha just looked at him for a moment, not sure if she really believed that, but decided it didn’t really matter.

She considered his invitation. She really wanted to go back to her room, preferably with that bottle of wine he’d given her, and try not to think about what she had just done. Except the thought of getting up right now, with her legs feeling like they were made of jelly, made her feel unbelievably tired.

So, she gave Julien a slight nod of her head, agreeing to stay, and saw that he looked both surprised and relieved at her decision. He leaned his head towards her for another kiss, this one almost chaste in comparison to all their others. 

“Julien,” prompted Thaisha when they had both gotten settled under the blankets, the room now dark. “I need you to do me a favor.”

“Maybe,” replied Julien, he was holding her hand up to his face, delicately rubbing his thumb across the back of it. He gave her an impish grin. “Depends on the favor.”

Thaisha slipped her hand from his. “Stay on your side of the bed,” she said, her tone leaving no room for argument. 

Not wanting to see his reaction, Thaisha turned over on her side, giving her back to Julien, her eyes determinedly closed.

After a moment that felt entirely too long, she felt him do the same.

*

In the morning, Julien was woken up by a ray of light slicing across his face, and was unsurprised to find Thaisha gone. Long gone if the coolness of the sheets were anything to go by. 

Though he did surprise himself by burying his face into the pillow she had used, trying to breathe in any trace of her that might still remain. 

He breathed a sigh of relief that it still smelled faintly of her, or maybe he only convinced himself that it did. Either way, he let out a small involuntary groan as memories from last night flooded his mind. The weight of them almost unbearable from the indisputable certainty that she couldn’t fucking stand him.

Couldn’t stand the sound of his voice, could barely even stand to look at him. None of which had stopped him from giving her everything that he could.

Julien rolled onto his back, still holding the pillow to him in what appeared to be a poor attempt to smother himself. He palmed at his burgeoning erection, and let out another groan, this one admittedly more pitiful, lying to himself that his hardening cock was the only reason he wished Thaisha had stayed till morning. 

You cannot stand the male looking down at you. That spark in his eyes, the demands from those lips, curled into a cruel smile at the flare of anger he feels from you, all sharp teeth and drunk on lust. His stare is just as cutting, and you can hardly tell if he hates the silvery silk you’re cloaked in, like moonlight dripping off your skin, or if the dislike is simply directed at your entire being.

Either way, you don’t have time. The both of you are supposed to be joining the others in Rhysand’s office for a final walkthrough of the plan before heading into the Hewn City for the night, one full of debauchery and putting on a show for the citizens that think you’re nothing more than a crony for a single-minded High Lord.

But Cassian had caught you in the hallway and forced you back into your room, cock hard and demanding you get on your knees for him. It was a thing that you don’t remember having started, as the both of you held a strong dislike towards each other for years, since Rhysand had brought you in to give a fresh stance on warfare. But lust had licked up your spine at his actions nonetheless. Damn that unaccepted bond purring in your chest, reacting to him in every way, betraying you to your core.

Rhysand didn’t think that Cassian would react with such abhorrence to the presence of another well trained general, especially a female. It wasn’t like he had brought you in to replace the warlord, although, from hearing some of his strategies, you thought you might’ve been brought in to do exactly that.

You size him up, as you always do, and his hazel eyes flicker at the challenge. Sparring with him always ended with both of you torn and bloody, neither of you willing to submit to the other. It carried on into the bedroom as well, fighting for control in the throes of lust, your unmated bonds thrumming in your chests, always reaching out for one another. 

And yet neither of you had denied it, though the threat always lingered, both of you teetering on the edge of declining the other when irritated too much. But that itch was constant, never fulfilled, urging you to react.

You open your mouth to snap back at him, a nasty retort on the tip of your tongue, but he’s quick – hundreds of years of Illyrian training under his belt had made him so. He grips your chin roughly, the bite of his fingers pressing into the hinge of your jaw makes your cunt clench, even as you glare up at him.

“Nuh-uh,” he scolds, like he knows exactly what you had planned on spewing. The fucking smirk on his face tells you that the only thing you’ll be spitting on is his cock, whenever he demands it. The steely, commanding look in his eyes makes a shiver crawl up your spine and your fists curl into the smooth fabric of your dress. “No talking.”

And Mother, do you want to speak just to piss him off. You know what will happen if you do, you’ve tried it on many occasions, testing his limits, because there was no way in hell that you were going to take his demands as easily as one of his mediocrely trained soldiers, not when the both of you so openly disliked each other.

But you’re already running late. You need to be downstairs soon for the briefing and if you open your mouth now he won’t let you cum. So instead, you bite your tongue to the brink of splitting it open, and sink to your knees before Cassian.

His cock twitches in his pants and he nearly groans at the sight of you, the harsh glare you’re sending up at him, your chin trapped in his hold. If he presses just a little firmer those pretty pink lips will pop right open for him–

Cassian works his belt loose with one hand, the other holding onto you like a vice. You don’t move, don’t dare to help him with his leathers. You so achingly want to watch his cock spring from confinement when he shoves them over the cutting muscles of his hips, but you don’t want to give him the satisfaction.

You settle for watching it from the corner of your eyes, so close that his cock nearly hits you in the face. 

You can feel the warmth radiating from his massive length and your mouth waters, remembering the last time you’d had that heavy heat between your lips. You swear he was Cauldron blessed.

He’s ready as ever, precum beading at the tip as he strokes himself once, twice, pressing the head of his cock against your mouth, smearing the milky bead across your lips. You take a deep inhale of the heady scent of him, but it only spikes your arousal. Cassian’s cock twitches at the  barely there feeling, an unconscious reaction to the mating bond festering beneath his skin.

You force nonchalance and hatred with every fiber of your being, staring up at him in defiance. Later, you will get your revenge, riding him until the sun wakes and not letting him cum until he forces you into the mattress and uses you like you’re nothing but a whore. You can picture the way his large hands will manhandle you, folding you into tight shapes for him as he pounds into your cunt with fervor, like a drowning man, spewing vitriol like they’re confessions of love.

A raised eyebrow, your way of asking, ‘Any more demands? Or can we get this started?’

Cassian’s grin turns feral, his fingers pinching open your jaw while his free hand coils your hair around into a tight fist.

“No gagging, sweetheart.”

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

You’re eager to play tonight, riled from the time spent with Cassian’s cock in your mouth, stretching your throat wide enough to take his entire length, your hair pulled into his large fist as he shoved your head closer to his body until your nose met the coarse hairs above his cock.

He held you there and you reveled in the burn. There was nothing gentle about him having full control of you, and the lick of lust you’d let slip between the two of you only made his free hand slide down, clamping at your soft neck where he could feel himself, your throat bulging around his girth. 

If you had more time he would have stripped you bare and lifted your cunt to his mouth to devour the wetness dripping from your folds. He was perhaps the most excited down there, and it was the only time where you’d let him dominate you, drawing orgasm after orgasm from you until your thighs quaked, breathing so ragged you couldn’t argue with him, hands holding so tightly to his hair he thought you might rip it clean from his scalp. 

He’d cum so far down your throat you could hardly feel the hot spurts as he released. You’d shoved at his hips in desperation, wanting to taste his familiar musk. By the end of it you’d had spit and cum dripping from your chin to the milky skin between your breasts the moonlit silk of your dress left bare.

You wanted to bathe in it, wear it proud like any battle scar, but you shoved those thoughts so deeply inside of you where his prying bond wasn’t able to reach. Instead, you sent him the ice cold hatred you felt anytime someone compared his strategies to yours. You honed in on that feeling and held on tight.

At least the material of your dress hadn’t been stained, and you’d made a valiant attempt at fixing your hair before you showed up to the meeting room with your comrades.

If any of them noticed anything off about you, they knew better than to speak.

Now, you’re prowling the large ballroom after having received a nod from your High Lord to lure and pry for information by any means necessary. Cassian preferred brute force and Azriel tended to seek information with his blades, while you used a different approach, one that might even work better than bloodshed and torture.

There’s nothing more threatening to a male than a female’s body.

The music playing throughout the hall is sensual in itself, the fast-paced sounds flowing throughout the room in a lustful wave. The sultry female voice harmonizes perfectly with her male counterpart, and the song sounds like it’s own mixture of lewd moans and words, the air hot and serenading the partygoers like sirens.

You’ve wanted nothing more than to press your body up against someone’s, and after having downed a few glasses of wine, that is exactly what you plan on doing.

Your eyes catch on a tall male then, your first victim. Rhysand had briefed you and the other members of the Inner Circle on him, Rhodes. His body is lean with muscle, skin a pretty pale blue that would draw the eye of anyone in the room. His caramel gaze scans the room as he speaks to a fellow warrior, an empty rock glass hanging lazily at his side. He has a strong nose and matching scars mirrored across both cheeks that somehow only exaggerates his rugged beauty. He’s one of Beron’s highest appointed commanders, and even you cannot deny his gorgeous features.

Slinking through the crowd to him is easy, and drawing him away from the male before him easier, drawing him deep into the crowd of writhing bodies with the promise of entertainment on your curved lips.

Oh, these generals of war and how they like to play.

Dancers clear from your path with scowls, some spitting insults at you as you drag their general through the hall with a grin, like you’ve won a luxurious prize. You don’t flinch or cringe away from them, only smile and swing your hand with the commanders to emphasize and flaunt what you’ve got.

You find a spot in the middle of the floor, where Rhysand and Feyre can both see you from the dais, where everyone has the perfect view of you and your prey, the scalding flash locking your spine in place tells you so.

You ignore the feeling, not letting your act falter as you spin to a stop before him. The blue-skinned fae doesn’t stop with you though, his large stride eats the last step separating you, forcing all of the air between you to rush away until his body is flush against yours. You have his full attention.

A playful smirk graces your lips as you stare up at him, fingers already reaching up, grazing across his dark tunic to wrap around his neck. His hands slide around your waist, gentlemanly for now. It’s a pleasing surprise, knowing how the males of the Hewn City actually are.

You find yourself falling into an easy rhythm with Rhodes, and your swaying quickly turns to writhing, grinding against him as his hands pull you desperately into his body at the command of the sinful music. You nearly lose your motive when you meet his butterscotch eyes, drinking in every movement you make. 

You can feel his interest against your hip.

Rhodes curls downwards, so tall that you wonder if his spine hurts just a little, as he dips down to meet your gaze more fully, a question in his eyes.

“You think you can have me?” you purr, a wicked smile gracing your lips as you trail a metallic dipped fingernail down the exposed blue of his chest. The effects of the wine have you buzzing, but you know better than to give and not receive payment for your efforts. “You know that there’s always a price to pay, don’t you, Rhodes?”

His burned buttery eyes flash with irritation and his grip on your hips tighten, a clear sign of his frustration. You can see the battle behind his heated gaze, how badly he wants you, what information he’s willing to give you in exchange for a taste.

The thunderous music peaks, crashing into a crescendo that makes you shiver as a second body closes in on you from behind, pressing flush against you. Your bond purrs in your chest but it could be the buzz from the wine as you arch backwards into the warmth, grinding into him as your head tilts back to lean against the wall of a male who’s trapped you between him and Rhodes, eyes shut in bliss and mouth open in a pleasured exhale.

The male behind you dips his head toward your ear and you can’t help but to tilt your head, leaning it against his temple as he speaks.

He chuckles, and Cassian’s breathy and hot words send shivers up your spine. “Oh, you’ll fuck anything, won’t you, sweetheart?”

At the sound of his voice your heart stops and your eyes snap open, locking directly on Rhodes’, who’s now looking down at you like you’re some sort of festering wound. He releases your hips immediately and he slinks back into the crowd on a jarring note from the violin, chin tilted high and glaring down at anyone who looks his way. Even he knows better than to fuck with one of the High Lords companions.

The shock must still be on your face when you turn around because Cassian’s shit-eating grin only widens before he’s taking your wrist in a firm grip and leading you from the dancefloor.

You want to refuse, but the bond in your chest is aching at you not to, to follow him even though you’re angrier than the Mother. He’s ruined your entire scheme.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” you spit once he’s dragged you from the party, putting a room between you and the debauchery that’s happening in the ballroom, music softening through the closed door.

Cassian spins on his heel, shoving you right up into the wooden frame. It’s too dark to read the look on his face but his eyes glimmer in the night and his wings pull up high. You can make out the shapes of his claws forming a taunting halo above his head.

His hands are everywhere all at once, pulling at the ties of your dress to release it from your body that’s already curving into his eager touch. The darkness chills your skin as the fabric melts to the ground and your breath is a gasp as Cassian’s mouth sucks harshly at the skin of your throat, quickly working his way downward, your heartbeat pounding in time with the drums of the notes in the other room.

“Don’t you want to be my good girl?” He taunts and you hiss, pulling at his hair from where you were threading the silky strands through your fingers.

“Fuck you,” you spit.

“No,” he growls, low in your ear. You let slip a strained moan as you feel the heat of his cock meet your dripping cunt before sliding in easily, one fell swoop that shoves all of the emotions you’ve buried deep inside of you to the surface. “Fuck you.”

You cry out in pleasure, clinging to him like you never want to let him go. Your legs wind around his waist and he presses your body into the door as he fucks into you, his fingers covering the spots where Rhodes had been holding you in the ballroom, replacing the commanders touch with his own.

The bond aches in your chest at your close proximity to your counterpart. Your other half, equals in every way yet you can’t stand each other. You can’t stand his stupid hair that fits perfectly between your fingers, his hazel gaze that’s always staring at you with malice. You hate the smirk he directs your way and how you can’t seem to ever get those lips off of your mind, how you dream about him as much as you work with him–

No. You need to shut that train of thought down immediately, but it’s so difficult when his cock commands them from you, pushing them to the surface with each thrust, you moan out his name instead.

“That’s right,” he says against your mouth, “Scream for me, sweetheart.”

And you do.

It’s the only thing you can do besides let your innermost feelings spill from your lips. You know that you shouldn’t feel this way, know that he loathes you, but you can’t help it. You were made to be his, to want him completely.

Your nails rake down his back, so awfully close to the base of his wings it has him shuddering a growling, nipping harshly at your lip as he untangles your hands from around him. You whimper at the loss when he pins them above your head in one hand, the other supporting you, the muscles of his arm bulging with the effort.

Head falling back on your shoulders, your thighs quake where they’re clasped around Cassian’s waist. You can feel the perspiration against your forehead as he presses his against your own, glaring down at you because he wants to watch you as he ruins you, makes a mess of you for everyone else tonight.

Your chest heaves against his, a battle all its own as your heart beats a booming rhythm. Your skin sticks to his and you gasp when he shifts, plunging into you from a different angle.

You cum on his cock but Cassian’s not finished with you. He bites at your shoulder when he feels you tense around him, revels in the noises you make, uncaring if anyone else hears. It is the Hewn City, afterall.

“Give me another,” he demands, picking up his pace, pressing into your further. You can hardly breathe with his body against yours and you think you’ve heard the wood of the door begin splitting open from how harshly he’s fucking you into it.

Your legs go limp around him but he has one thing on his mind, releasing your arms in favor of latching onto your legs to hold you up. You mewl at the relentless way that he’s fucking into you, the long draw of your orgasm quickly building into another as his cock hits the spot inside of you like he’s known it all along.

You have no choice but to follow his demand, cumming around him again with a keen as he follows, releasing into you, his breathing ragged.

He leans against you for a moment as he collects his bearings and before you have the chance to revel in the way his body molds perfectly to yours he’s dropping you to your feet and tucking himself away.

“Clean yourself up, you look like a mess.”

His words clang in your chest like a death knoll, harsh and unrelenting. You should have known it to be true, neither of you ever stayed a minute longer in each other’s presence once you’d finished, but this…this stings.

Cassian leaves you in the darkened room by yourself while he slips away, headed towards the dining room where dinner is about to be served.

You sit for a long moment, his cum dripping down your thighs as you bury unwanted emotions away. Your dress is a disheveled mess and your lips are bruised with his kisses, skin dotted purple from his touch. 

You knew that the Mother was cruel, but not like this. Because you’re mated to the male you loathe, even if he has ruined you for every other body in Prythian.

You fist the silky material of your dress as your anger seeps in.

No. You will not let him humiliate you this time. You’re the one he stopped in the hall. You’re the one he dragged away from Rhodes. You’re the one who made him cum again and again. 

You’re not letting Cassian have this one.

It takes you two times to stand because of how bad your legs are trembling. Your thighs are sore from how hard Cassian fucked you and you can feel every place he touched as you shove your skirts down to cover your slick legs. You hadn’t bothered to wipe him from you. No, you want them all to know who treats you like this.

You stalk towards the dining room, building your confidence brick by brick with each clack of your heels. Spine straightening, chin tilting upward, mouth pressed into a firm line.

Let them see the tear in your dress, the mess of your hair, the smear of your lipstick halfway across your cheek. Let them smell the cum dripping down your thighs. Show them how much of a brute through and through Cassian is. 

Fuck him.

As you near, you hear the heavy scrape of a chair against the floor. It’s an urgent sound, like someone’s realized they’ve forgotten their weapon in another room. Just as you’re about to turn the corner to enter the dining room Cassian appears, wrapping a firm arm around your waist and hoisting you over his shoulder in such a swift move it takes your mind a moment to catch up. The talon of his wing nearly tears your forehead open and you make a noise of frustration in retaliation.

“Hey,” you shout, pounding at his back. His grip is tight, unrelenting and your fists don’t seem to have any effect on the hard cording of his back. “Put me down!”

“No,” he growls in response, stalking away from the dinner guests.

But you’re not giving up, you never have.

Cassian lets you slip from his shoulder but he’s quick to pin you against the wall, as far from the dinner his body would allow before the need to be buried inside of you again becomes unbearable.

“I’m hungry,” you say, acting aloof as ever. 

Cassian grins wolfishly, “I’ll give you something to put in your mouth then, how about that?”

You don’t have a chance to respond because he’s dipping down, lips capturing yours in a feral kiss that’s more teeth than lips.

Your body reacts instinctually. You’re clawing at his clothes, but he no longer seems to care if buttons pop from the ridiculous shirt Rhys had forced him into, if the fabric snags against his wings in your haste to rid him of it. It’s like you can’t control yourself, something deep inside of you needing to be filled by him always.

He spins you around and you plant your hands against the wall to brace yourself. Rucking your dress up on your hips, Cassian is quick to tug his trousers off once more. And while you’d come here with the intention of giving him a piece of your mind, your body clearly has other thoughts, your mating bond thrashing around in the cage it’s being locked in.

“Don’t be fucking greedy now,” he grunts as you arch into him, shoving your cunt back to take him more fully. His hands are steel on your hips, the pads of his fingers digging roughly into your skin, halting your movements. “Already ready for round two?”

You bite your lip so hard you nearly draw blood as you try to stifle the whimper crawling up your throat. Gods, you need more, you need his broad chest pinning you to the wall, you need to feel the roughness of the partition imprinted into your cheek as he tries to shove you through it while he fucks into you harder, unable to control himself, giving into that primal urge that you’re feeling as well, the bond trying to claw it’s way from your body and into his–

“You’ll get as much as I give you,” his snarl is paired with a shifting of his hips, not forward, but back. It sends a flash of anger through you and you’re shaking in his grasp, you’re sure he can feel it beneath his hold on you. You can feel the head of his cock pulling out and you squeeze your eyes shut, clenching around him desperately, like it might just keep him there.

Cold air rushes through your lungs as he retreats. If you were a better female you wouldn’t beg, but the warmth of his pulsing cock withdrawing from your cunt is like losing a limb. You can feel your heart rate pick up in panic as his tip halts right inside of your entrance, any slight movement from you will send him sliding out completely.

You gasp desperately, and it sounds like a plea of pain while he holds you on the end of this hot cock.

“Fuck you like you love me, Cassian,” you beg, body shaking with the effort it takes to keep still for him. You don’t even realize what you’ve said until the air shifts in the aftermath.

Cassian’s hold on your hips turns to steel and his spine straightens. The bond in his chest roars and his vision goes white. He nearly loses the grip he has on himself, the wall he’d so carefully built between the two of you, and your confession has him wanting to bury his cock so deeply into you it’ll break you in half, so that he’s embedded into your body, your soul, forever.

“Tell me again,” he commands, but it’s not a warcry signaling the beginning of battle. No, it’s something else, much softer. It makes you whimper.

But you refuse. You will not repeat the words that had slipped from your mouth as if someone else had taken control of your body, as if your mating bond had grown a voice and forced it from you on its own. The words that had been shoved so deeply within yourself that they hardly even sound like you.

Cassian’s demeanor changes at your lack of response, fisting your hair in his grasp. He forces you into the wall with his elbow to your spine and pulls your hair tight. Your neck cranes and your back bows in his hold. He leans in close, breath hot in your ear as he growls. “Tell. Me. Again.”

“Please,” you gasp. Please don’t make me repeat myself. Please don’t stop fucking me. Please don’t hate me–

“No, that’s not it,” he scolds, but his tone takes on a slightly softer tone. His movements are agonizingly slow, sliding deep into like he hasn’t left in the middle of dinner to fuck you against the wall not even twenty feet away. Your entire body shudders in reaction to the long stroke, and tears burn your eyes when he nearly pulls all the way out of you again. “Tell me, sweetheart. I didn’t hear you.”

“Don’t,” you choke, a stubborn tear rolling hot down your cheek. You squeeze your eyes tight so he doesn’t see, “You’re being cruel, Cassian.”

“I think you’re the one being cruel, sweetheart,” he counters lowly. “Taunting me with your words, touching other males, teasing me with this perfect pussy.” His last words are accentuated by two sharp thrusts that make your cunt convulse and a weak moan escape your lips. “So I think you’ll be repeating exactly what you said a moment ago when I ask you.”

How can such harsh words make you feel like this? Cassian’s been nothing but rude to you since you’d arrived and yet he makes you feel like no other has. And if this is how you feel when he’s discourteous, you imagine how you’d feel if he actually had feelings…

Cauldron fucking spare me.

You work to swallow, refusing to meet his gaze as you speak, voice trembling. “I said…fuck me like you love me.”

The air is sucked from your body at the admission, his body, from the room. He’s so silent that if his warmth at your back and the head of his cock weren’t torturing you, you wouldn’t even know he was here at all.

“Look at me,” Cassian asks, and his voice is soft, so tender that it makes you flinch.

You refuse. You can’t force yourself to look at him. Not when he’s going to glare at you and make fun of you–

“Sweetheart,” he coos, tracing a gentle thumb across your cheek. “Please.”

And you do.

You don’t even know who you’re looking at. Cassian’s hazel eyes have gone soft, big and wide and staring at you like he doesn’t recognize you either. His bond strokes against your heart like his fingers do your spine, his grip in your hair slackening as his brash fingertips melt into a caress.

“I do love you, sweetheart,” he admits, and a part of you so desperately wants to believe that he’s lying. That his sappy glance will morph into one of condescending and taunting, but you can see it in his eyes that he’s being nothing but honest.

That feeling in your chest tells you so, too.

But you can’t help the insecurities that whimper out of you. “You do?”

He releases a shaky chuckle and he relaxes like a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders. You gasp as he pulls out of you completely but he’s spinning you around and drawing you into his body, pressing his lips against yours in a searing kiss that doesn’t burn with lust but with love.

“Gods, yes,” he pants, pressing his forehead against yours. “I don’t know when it changed. Reckon I’ve always loved you, I think.”

Your heart soars at his words, mating bond singing in your chest. You can’t help but to grin up at him, brushing a loose strand of hair from his face, admiring his own look of awe.

“I think I’ve always loved you too, Cassian,” you sigh. Unable to help yourself you press up onto the tips of your toes, pecking him on the lips once, and then again. 

The war between you is over.

Almost, because the string in your chest coiling and twining with his is the last thing keeping you apart. 

Cassian must feel it too because he’s groaning like a dying male, leaning into you exaggeratedly. It makes you giggle and his heart soar.

“If I eat you out does that count as completing the bond, sweetheart? Need you to be mine right now.”

You laugh, burrowing your head into his chest. “Cassian, there is a dinner table right on the other side of this wall.”

He pulls away from you, face hard. The smile slips from your lips but his look isn’t one of anger, but primal protection.

“I’m not letting any of those fuckers see you like this.”

You cross your arms over your chest and raise your eyebrow in challenge. “Like what?”

That familiar razor-sharp smirk graces his lips, making your heart flutter in your chest. He reaches down to where your dress is torn and bunched up from your promiscuous activities, dragging two long fingers through your wetness and cum from minutes earlier. 

You shudder as he draws his fingers away, into his mouth, answer enough.