#hate existence

Screaming and punching walls

I'll never be enough of a girl like physically or whatever will I

tfw when u want to drop out but u only have one year left so its like ehhhh

My moms notion of: she's not doing what I want so I'm going to cut her off from everything/one is really driving me up a wall. I'm tired and crying and want more whisky because I don't want to be alive for 2015 at all. Last night was somewhat nice but today it's setting in and like nope not this please anything but this. Last year I had to stay drunk the first four days of the new year so idk why I thought I would be able to cope with 2015 starting without any form of buffering or substance to pacify my emotions.

I feel so alone.