#hasbin vox

Cr: geryghosty

🪳🦈📺

Valentino:

~Oh, what a mess, baby. Why, why do you make me do this to you? Look at your little face, your beautiful little face.~

Incoming message from Vox:

[Val,gettomyofficeNow]

Valentino:

~You knew how this would end. It hurts me far more than it hurts you. You know how much I love you, Meow-Meow. And I won’t give you to anyone, my treasure.~

Incoming message from Vox:

[YOURSONISABOUTTOSELLHISASSTOADEADLYSIN]

Valentino:

Damn you, Vox! Meow-Meow, go wash the blood off and get yourself together. I need to step out on urgent business.

----

Valentino:

What the hell is going on here?! I’m insanely busy!

Velvette:

You’d better sit down, or you’re going to fall.

Vox:

Maggot, repeat what you just told me.

Vax:

I’ve begun my plan to conquer the mortal world and—

Vox:

(laughter and static)

Valentino:

Young man, tighten the suspenders on your pants. You will NOT repeat your father’s mistakes! Want me to remind you of that story?! And you too, Vox?!

Vax:

Pff. Who needs Heaven? There’s no work there, no pain, no fun of any kind. I plan to integrate Earth’s mass media into our current capacities. And then — who knows — maybe both worlds will merge into one.

Vox:

Do you even understand how human society works, brat?! You’ve never been to Earth.

Vax:

I’ve heard a lot about the place. And…

(proudly grabbing his suspenders)

Actually, I’ve already been there. For a whole twenty minutes!

The V Triumvirate:

(in unison) What?!

Vax:

Gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to an incubus recruit.

Vox:

(slams his fist on the desk, laughing through tears)

The worst of both of us, my boy!

Valentino:

Idiot! You’re a sinner, not hellspawn!

Vax:

By “jus soli,” I was born in Hell and am considered a full-fledged demon chimera.

Velvette:

Since when do they take outsiders as tempters?

Vax:

The population of souls on Earth has surpassed nine billion, and Asmodeus is inflating his staff before most of humanity passes through the second demographic transition. Young people prefer different sins than adultery. All I need is to learn how to split my screen to stream AI clips of slicing random objects with knives. Then they’ll issue me an artifact for travel to Earth.

Valentino:

Kitty! Bring me my absinthe and cocaine!

Mi niño, every heart of your mami’s skips in terror when you leave this tower! And now you’re saying you want to leave HELL?! Vox, say something!

Vox:

Grab me a pair of white fabric spats for my oxfords — the kind they’re wearing on Earth right now!

Valentino:

(kicks his consort in the shin)

Vox:

Fuck!

Yeah — bring your mother a vicuña-wool coat in red leopard print.

Valentino:

VOX!

Vox:

What do you want from me?! For me to make a sinner not be a sinner?! Worst case, he gets killed there and hitchhikes back to the Pride Ring. Let the boy get bruises and experience instead of clinging to your garter belt.

Valentino:

You can’t work as an incubus! I forbid it! What if dying on Earth kills you for good?! Have you seen what’s happening in their news?! That place is more dangerous than Hell!

Vox:

You’ll never know if you don’t try.

Vax:

As one great man once said: “Chaos isn’t a pit. Chaos is a ladder — it can lead down or up.”

Vox:

That’s some damn audacious flattery, kid. I know what you’re getting at, but I’m not going to calm your mother down for you. He’s absolutely right. I need a living undead heir to a media empire, not a pretty, tear-soaked tragedy.

Velvette:

You can’t just become a tempter. Succubi study for eight years to get access to Earth.

Vax:

I’m already doing that. Besides, the “sleep paralysis” ability is the foundation of the mind-control school. Tempter isn’t the optimal starting position for business conquest — but look at Dad. He started as a field reporter and now he sits in his chair.

Vox:

Son, I’ve been in this business for decades. And there’ll be a lot more filthy dicks like Jeffrey Epstein on your path.

Valentino:

KITTY! Where’s my absinthe?! MAMI’S NOT WELL!

Velvette:

I sent her out this morning for Loro Piana fabrics.

Valentino:

(covers his eyes with his hand)

Vax, demons are scamming you for the sake of hooks on our family. Everyone in both worlds knows your father’s reputation. They wouldn’t let you anywhere near Asmodeus’s recruitment center.

Vax:

Ozzy himself walked me in. By the way, Mommy, he says hello.

Valentino:

What?!

Velvette:

Sounds like a solid pitch for a reality show: “A guy chases his dream even though everyone knows he needs it like a cow needs a saddle.” What did you call him?

Vax:

The Lord of Sin is well aware of what’s going on in our circle of Hell. By the way, Dad, his guards took my angel-steel string. I pulled it out of your piano.

Vox:

You did what?! You know that no one in hell will sell me even a gram of angel steel!

Vax:

I already replaced it with Charlie Kirk’s tendons!

Vox:

That’s… acceptable. Go on.

Vax:

He was intrigued by my nature — being born without sin from a sinful duo. He vouched for me so I’d be trained alongside the other demon tempters.

Vox:

(ha) At least somewhere your lower pair of naughty hands came in handy.

Valentino:

You used the “joker” I’d kept up my sleeve for years — to call on Asmodeus in a critical moment — just to get into the SUCCUBUS ACADEMY?! Velvette, give me your chancleta!

Vax:

(flailing his hands and wings)

Mami, don’t! This agreement is strictly between me and Asmodeus! I’m not a nepo baby!

Kitty:

The drug?

Valentino:

Finally.

Bichito, you have no idea how lucky you are that a deadly sin is obsessed with cyborgs. My word means nothing in this house. Don’t come crying into my tits like your father when your own ambitions snap you on the nose.

Vox:

You always say that — and always let us bury ourselves in your fluffy tits.

Vax:

(proudly grabbing his suspenders again)

Being a cyborg didn’t play a decisive role. I’m a multifaceted individual.

Vox:

(leads back in his chair, feet on the desk)

We’ll see, multifaceted individual — how you pass your first exam, and whether there’s a mortal who’s experienced the sexuality of Nyarlathotep’s forms straight out of Lovecraft’s books.

Vax:

That’s exactly why I’m here. Velvette, do you have a contact for Hans Giger?

Velvette:

(scrolling through her phone)

Hmm, doesn’t seem so. But I do have a contact who can help us. You know our designer?

Vax:

Alexander McQueen? He can help me make a proper outfit for the exam?

Velvette:

He’s been doing that for both lives now, sweetheart. Come on — we need to find some materials for sketches and textures. I think I saw one of your exoskeleton moltings under the couch the other day.

Valentino:

…

Vox:

…

Valentino:

He’s going to do it anyway.

Vox:

Absolutely.

Valentino:

He’s doing this because he inherited your hunger for power.

Vox:

And he’s doing it like this because he inherited your lack of principles.

----

Sorry, but I couldn’t imagine the range of emotions of a person visited during sleep paralysis by a creature that is half cockroach, a quarter shark, and a quarter iPad, dressed like Lady Gaga in her prime

era.

HELLSPAWNS PIN SERIES IS UP FOR PRE-ORDERS!!!

UGH!!! i've been doodling most of these for the longest time, and since i was doing a restock of Al, i just launched all of them at the same time XDD!!!

And this is just the first wave!! I wanna draw the ladies too!! SOOO MANY CHARACTERS THAT I LOVE!!