#harlemite

So let me be real, I ain’t shit. I have this weird relationship with writing, its like I am committed until life actually hits me and the thought of doing more, even if it’s a simple as writing about my day, seems tedious and too much. I promise every time I promise to write more that I mean it, I just struggle with consistency and confusing self-care with obligation. Because lets be real, its a thin line between burden and release, especially when your release is to write about your burdens. 

But.. Any who, I am going to get my life together one day. I feel like I have too much to say, too many wild ass encounters to rant about and too many moments where my stars just seemed to align to not write it down. I don’t care who reads my posts, honestly, I mean I do in the sense that I want to share my work with people but I do it more for me than anyone else. Just knowing that someone took their time out to hear me out is refreshing. It kind of restores my hope in humanity in sense, it shows that people still find value you in investing in another people’s narratives. 

This summer I feel like I have to set up some goals. I am one job down, in a semi-intoxicating relationship and attending an Ivy League for my masters in the fall. 

Super Sidebar: I didn’t even know Columbia was an Ivy League. I’m probably one of the smartest dumb people that you will ever meet but yo, it’s actually lit. I honestly can say that I am bad and indeed bougie. It’s Teacher’s College but it’s still Columbia sis. Check me out!

So, in honor of this summer being my prep for life as a graduate student here is a list of things I need to get done this summer, NO EXCUSES!

1. Driver’s License: I use to lie to myself and say that I can drive and that I was just scared of the other drivers. LIES! I fucking suck at driving and am more scared of me killing everyone than I am scared of them killing me.

2. Put out an EP: This isn’t deadass but it’s deadass. I have been singing all my life, it’s not fair to myself that I let that dream of being a singer fade because I didn’t have the support that I wanted from my family. I know my limits, my talent and no one else will believe in it if I don’t invest in it.

3. Consistently work on my body: I am and have always been a person who trial commits. My body has always been a struggle and although I’ve grown to accept it, I still have moments when I just want to get a vacuum and a knife and channel my inner Dr. Miami.