Way back in my early days of Tumblr I made a friend on here from Kuwait. He was lovely and chatty and we’ve been good buddies for years. Eventually he had a chance to visit and I was so excited to meet in person after years of texting.
I was living with Betty at the time and she and her boyfriend heard he was from the Middle East and started making jokes about whether he'd know what a toilet was. I was unamused and informed them that the Kuwaiti dinar had three times the weight of a US dollar which quickly silenced them.
Betty was further shocked when he arrived and asked why we didn't have a bidet. "Every room in my house has one, you guys just wipe with dry paper all the time? Doesn't it hurt?"
"I guess we get used to it," I replied.
"Is that why Americans have the phrase 'hard ass'? Because your assholes get so calloused?"
I absolutely lost it and didn't realize he wasn't making a joke. The question stuck with me for years causing aftershocks of laughter whenever it popped into my head.
But today I was delighted to inform him that my wife and I are finally civilized and have a bidet at home.











