#happyvent

I just need you guys to know how important you are to me and I want to scream it out there how much you mean to me, how much your support helps me and just… that I wouldn’t be the same without you.

I know there are things I’m good at, also things I’m not good at and then there are things I’m terrible at. But that’s perfectly fine because I have you guys, being there, listening to me, helping me without any questions or conditions, making up for the things I lack. Every one of you is unique and wonderful, every bond I share with you is so different but equally heartwarming and appreciated. So please, listen to me telling you what you mean to me, okay? Of course I love you for everything you are but I kinda discovered that each of you lifts me up in a different way and I needed to share. (And yes, that’s the alphabetical order of your Tumblr names bc I refuse to give our friendships any order since the love I receive is beyond the charts anyways.)

My sanity - @kiwipaca Like, seriously? I would have lost my shit so often already if it wasn’t for you, always being there for either raging with me, calming me down or just making me laugh so my anger disappears. You help me to process my emotions almost immediately and knowing how much my emotions control me, it means a lot. Like, a lot. And since you know almost all the time what I’m thinking and feeling anyway, there’s not really a need to explain this here but you understand and get me without me really having to explain it. And that means a lot too. It literally saves me most times and I wouldn’t be able to deal with some stuff without you, some things would have overwhelmed me if it wasn’t for you. You really do keep me sane.

My spirit and my courage - @midnight1217 & @reyawoodelf (these two just can’t be separated neither in my head nor heart) I couldn’t be as lighthearted as I am without you. Maybe I would question if being the way I am is really okay and sufferable for others if you wouldn’t embrace my quirkiness as much as you do. You help me a great deal with being myself and being happy with it, knowing that people can love the sides of me many others hate. You encourage me to do things I would be too afraid to try and fail otherwise. You guys showed me what an unconditional friendship truly is. 

My strength - @mysterious-prologue-guy No matter what’s going on, no matter what I struggle with, no matter how fast my heart is beating bc of fear or nervousness or anticipation, you always find just the right words to back me up, to give me the nudge I need to feel confident again. To go through with stuff, to know that I’m not alone and that you always got my back. When I have to make a big decision, I always feel the need to talk to you first. I know you’ll be there and understand me, will give me the exact advice I need. We’ve been through so much and I am so glad I can always count on you when it matters. 

My inspiration - @reifromrfa / @whisperbinder Oh my god, I admired you so much when I first discovered your works and was wondering if I could be like that one day. And I’m still wondering, to be honest. And I’m also still very much admiring you, obviously. You are so hardworking (I accidentally wrote heartworking first and tbh that’s accurate as well) and ambitious and talented and SO welcoming and warm-hearted. You kick my insecurities in the ass, turn to me and say: “Just do it, girl.” You motivate me to be the person I want to be. 

My inner peace - @wildlife-xx This one is hard to put into words. You’re just… there. All the time, every time I need you and also when I don’t need you but want to spend time with you nevertheless. I’m not sure if you know how much it means to me that you listen to everything I have to say, the good and the bad things, and that you validate and support my feelings and passions even though you don’t understand them all the time. You stand beside me and let me do whatever I think is right, you’re always there with me and you’re down for the wild ride. And you know that, with me, the ride will be wild.

For now, that’s all. I needed this out there. I couldn’t do the things that make me happy without your support. I don’t know if you guys are aware how much your love affects me and how much it helps me to define and form who I really am but it does. And I want you guys to know. I wouldn’t be the same without you and I am so proud and happy and glad to be the person I am today. 2018 was hard but I think I found myself over the span of last year, or at least a huge part of myself. And you still help me to discover more. Thanks to you I not only got through those hard times but benefitted from them and I’m still in awe about how lucky I am and will forever wonder how I deserve all of this.