#grenade journal

The thesis is: Desire I Want to Turn Into You (DIWTTITY) is an exploration of the many forms our relationships to billionaires take.

So I saw that advert (the amazon one - with Bunny is a Rider and the cat) last week, and I can no longer abstain from posting about it.

*club-horn blaring* Never Post Podcast Mentioned *bhrmmm bhrmm bhrmr*

My family and friends will no longer tolerate the Pepe Silvia timbre of my yelling about CARO POLO (Caroline Polachek). So I simply must turn to outlet of the desperate - making posts - and talking to strangers on the internet about my little obsessions.

(I joined r/Caroline Polachek and they are all disappointingly normal about her(!) it's nice and fun there. But c'mon now I wanna talk to the people who are being little freaks about her - I know they're out there - it cannot possibly just be me!)

I am making a slow series (there's like 2) of tikt*ks about the subject - and I've been posting Grenade Journals about it for quite some time!

CAROLINE POLACHEK's diwttity IS OBSESSED WITH BILLIONAIRES!

As you well know.

06 May 2024

17 FEB 2024

The MCR that exists inside the minds of obsessives (me) is kind of like the holy mother (Mary) -- it's not the thing or even a representation of that thing anymore. It's not even a simulacra (? I might be pushing it with this - because upon reflection I think I might be describing a simulacra quite accurately actually - haha)

it no longer bears a likeness, really at all. An idol is what the k-pop darlings call it, and that makes sense to me. I feel it's closest to an effigy. An item that has had so much projected upon it, it becomes holy*.

Wholly unrecognisable

GIMME ALL THAT PAIN

That Gucci Scent - The Last Day of Summer

*Holy - to the holder, and item of ultimate projection. Like close reading. Like for what you really collect is always yourself**. Like all fan art, is just art, is just a reflection of self and now. A light bent through the body.

**Baudrillard, The System of Objects

April 2024 (Iodine)

Getting a lil bit tired of being treated like a mug for trying to remain open hearted. Do people not imagine what tenacity and discipline is required to keep a song in your heart. in. this. world?!

Listening on Hecate - Hope - Vampire Weekend.

Weather Forecast: Cloudy with a chance of cynicism

02 August 2024 - Orthostatic Shock

Attended 05 July 2024

it's always an uncomfortable moment - taking our parents to a place I think they will enjoy and then having to wait and see.

⇌ (Reversible Reaction Arrow)

Joy Exhibition @ the Melbourne (Naarm) Immigration Museum - collection of blue promotional paint cards/souvenirs.

I suppose parents know about this kind of suspension sickness quite acutely.

Couple of pages, one from about this time last year and two from last week-ish.

Page 1. 17 Nov 2022 - Flower on Head Bunny.

Soft Sweet Naive Tender Bunny.

She's a Rider - Caroline Polachek "Bunny is a Rider"

of Montreal "Bunny Ain't No Kind of Rider"

Listening on OGION (my computer, all my towers have been named after famous fictional wizards, which I kinda didn't realise until I got this new one last year and was like I gotta name it!)

Page 2. 06 Dec 2023 - Billions and Billionaires.

I've been thinking about Caroline Polachek's Desire I Want to Turn Into You (DIWTTIY) a LOT, I can tell because Kits has started calling her "Caro Polo" in a funny singsong voice that implies we're talking about the -thing- again. I will try to write all the loosely assembled thoughts down a in a continue reading jump. Maybe. I dunno.

Erstwhile indie darling, goose screamer, k*yne scooper and acclaimed quirked-up vocalist Caro Polo has stopped explaining, intellectualising, labeling, making sense! I'm sure there's theory or a name for this idea or reoccurring expression(ism) ;) because of course there's always a framework, context and philosophy that one must know of and employ effectively to place their work in the culture - but good pop music doesn't make sense, or have a basis in theory, and it will not explain itself!

I think PONY by Ginuwine is the most clear example, to mind, like you get it... you get what he's on about, the vibe could not be more legible, tbh, but the song lyrics themselves are not in clear support of the thesis, nor is the odd farting bass, but nonetheless you vibe!

It’s giving C'mon stop trying to hit me and hit me. Morpheus in the Matrix, who was of course shitting on the mother toilet when he said that.

I dunno for sure, really the intentionality of it or her work generally, and it is beside the point — to be encoded or decoded merely makes it a signal, not a sign, not a message, not a meaning. Is this all in there or are you projecting? It doesn't matter so much, as it is a successful attempt at unfocussing that third mythic eye*, feeling that intangible gestalt enough that she's tuning into the desperate leitmotifs of the current moment and amplifying/refracting them through this soaring album.

OSTENSION. DéTOURNEMENT. RECUPERATION.

Par Avion

Re: The Billion____s and The Billionaires

Page 3. 06 Dec 2023 - Année du Lapin (2023) Year of Bunny

Low Pixel

Certified Top 0.1% fan of Caroline Polachek in 2023

Bunny is Hustle Culture?

Bunny is the girls on Epst*in's Private Island? This has legs but is grim and requires more thoughtful elaboration than the general rambling I’m currently on.

Is DIWTTIY about the weird, real and unreal relationship we all have with billionaires because of their inescapable influence over lives?

Is that what the Grimes feat. is about? Is that why Caro Polo did the Harambe song? I've got a Hyper-Chain-Link-Fence of Theories.

That Trace Dominguez video - You Love Billionaires?

Why Bunny?

and What makes her a Rider?

*Probbo I know!

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