#godsbox

couldn't & wouldn't were two separate terms : suguru geto wouldn't work as a sorcerer on the behalf of tokyo technical branch any more , but that didn't mean that his sorcerer abilities would leave him . no , in fact , they were arguably a tad stronger the farther that he walked away from tengen's belittling protective measures . ( it felt strange , the last words he'd departed satoru gojo with , just as strange as the words the other had left him ruminating with ; not this time , g'night , suguru . now , satoru wasn't a terribly touchy person , suguru wouldn't be either if his senses were constantly working like gojo's were , but the fact that he'd been embraced stuck with him . embraced , and it worked like a temporary glue , forcing the pieces already beginning to break off from suguru's soul back into place , in the same satisfying click as those dvd cases . even now , they were tethered to him loosely , clinging using the strengthening affections & sympathy of his partner . if gojo hadn't survived . . . suguru would have done worse than leave . he would have fulfilled a toddler's twisted fantasy , setting fire and destruction upon the campus , wiping it off the map , or continuing to destroy until it was . what a terrible thought . )

Kiss & Tell

Sometime in 2007...

Understanding didn't grace her no matter how many times she blinked rapidly. Her pupils were normally lost in the obsidian of her irises, but the afternoon sun hung at just the right angle to make them distinguishable in her wide eyes, which darted about their surroundings. No hint of others nearby. At least, not that she could tell. Her lips, previously parted in disbelief, pressed together in a baffled little pout.

Gojo Satoru had suggested they kiss?

Sounds muffled, unable to overcome the buzz of blood rushing up to her face, staining her cheeks a pink that rivaled her hair. Surreal. Jangmi would think this was all some strange dream, except that he had never tread through her sleeping subconscious before, and she knew no reason he would abruptly make an appearance. She stared at her reflection in his dark sunglasses. Years and years of bullying in her adolescence made her wonder what he saw in her that was at all kissable. Sure, she treated him kindly, just like she would with anyone who hadn't done something to lose her respect. She was more patient with him than Nanami and Utahime-senpai were. Still, when she was so used to being despised--for something as small as her lineage--no matter what she did, none of it seemed like reason enough for anyone to want to kiss her.

A spark in the mind, quickly lighting the metaphorical bulb and casting clarity over her mind: He's just bored and looking to entertain himself. That seemed the most likely, now that she thought about it. He would ask her and not Geto- or Shoko-senpai because there was less relationship to damage if it all went wrong. Now the question was, was she bored and bold enough to do it? Jangmi supposed as far as kissing partners went, she could do worse. At least Gojo was pretty, after all. He was strong, too, which was kind of cool. Vapid reasonings like that were not enough to garner her attraction, however, and he had never done anything that made her think of him in that way. Now Geto-senpai, on the other hand, with his charming personality... he had made her heart flutter a time or two.

Still looking into the shaded lens, she watched curiosity overtake her own features. Her mouth relaxed back into a neutral expression as she considered it. Finally, after a few heartbeats, she gave an almost imperceptible nod, more of a nervous twitch of her head than anything else, really. One step. Two. And another, coming forward and lifting up onto her tiptoes in an effort to help close the gap. Even then, her mouth was only level with his collarbones, and she had to reach her hands up to loosely clasp at the nape of his neck, carefully pulling him down. Her gaze flickered to his lips, steadily coming closer, and at the very last moment, she shut her eyes and sucked in a soft, shaky breath.

Warmth was all she registered at first, when their lips just barely touched. It wouldn't be nearly enough if she stopped there--he'd surely make fun of her--so she ventured closer. Now skin brushed over skin, soft and gentle as flower petals shifting on a blossom, and a tingling sensation accompanied the light pressure, stemming from their joined mouths and splitting off in her throat to creep up into her head and flow down throughout her body.

megumi fushiguro would NOT be left behind. certainly not by any of his peers. it wasn't completely his sense of pride that dictated this desire either, but a sense of responsibility. yuji itadori was ever on his mind, and recently, megumi had come to the realization that itadori had surpassed him. megumi had made a silent vow to himself to make sure the world never knew the horror of sukuna, and it was partially on his shoulders to ensure itadori never lost control. how could he hold back the tide when he was so weak?

but he knew that thinking was WRONG. it was the product of exhaustion, insecurity... and the way he always felt around gojo. no matter how he'd grown in recent years, he felt dwarfed by SATORU GOJO. the man had been the most consistent force in his life, yet he could never truly relate to him the way either of them had likely hoped. here he was now, having come to him for guidance on improving, and the only result was feeling even more frustrated than before.

it wasn't that he was ungrateful either. he did truly appreciate the things he learned from his teacher, and he knew it was no small thing that gojo had made this time for him. still, he fought the urge to grit his teeth as he pondered his reply.

( geto had always hidden the fact that swallowing a curse was an experience full of personal agony , a sacrifice at the altar of humanity , bloody and wretched . a shaman's entire reason for living was to save people , to save HUMANS , at the expense of whatever was on the table : life , limb , anything was game . everything was temporary for a shaman , they couldn't even live for themselves , they had to sign away their fate to ungrateful , callous humans who didn't even recognize them , and who were unlikely to care even if they did . that was a curse , that was death . suguru hadn't been alive for months , merely dragging his body from place to place , gathering curses in his spare time in remote areas of japan , the powerful ones , the dangerous ones , and he was thanked a grand total of zero times . the static inside of his head grew rapidly assimilating those terrible curses . damned , unabashedly rotten things . like him , like them . ) the chances of getting out of this job alive were looking gradually slimmer by the day , and it wasn't like suguru had the power his best friend did . satoru was always making the impossible a reality , the honored one , the special one , so special that this partnership had disintegrated & geto wondered if satoru even noticed . what if he didn't ? ❝   . . . i know , but if it were a method they hadn't tried . you know they're so stuck in their ways . . . there's got to be something i can do . . . i refuse to believe those old bastard's have exhausted all their options . they benefit too much from our deaths to truly look into it .  ❞ ( yu's corpse , in the forefront of his mind , yes , there were benefits to their deaths , but none the victim would ever see . ignorance rears its head in the form of new students , able to be controlled and lied to , forced foolishly into giving away their lives for a farce . that's what this was : a farce , a facade . this school was a lie , a paragon of bygone values . ) they were all at the endless bottom of the wheel of fortune , forever groveling at their scraps of happiness , praise , and admiration . logic constituted that eventually , there would be an end . . . but this game's been rigged from the first flare : if nothing was done , they'd be here forever . if nothing was done , they'd all die there . this endless parade of horrors had to cease , one way or the other . ❝     . . . there's got to be another way . . .      ❞

                 ❝       .    .    .     i  can’t  ,  ‘  toru  .      ❞             suguru  hasn’t  been  himself  for  months  now  ;    &  there  was  a  considerable  concern  that  he  might  never  be  again  with  the  ache  in  his  chest  ,  the  disgusting  curses  in  his  body  ,  assimilating  and  appropriating  them  accordingly  .    the  creeping  dissatisfaction  took  geto  by  the  throat  the  night  of  riko  amani’s  death  ,  and  had  begun  to  progressively  constrict  with  ruthless  abandon  ;  reinforced  by  the  loneliness  ,  death  ,  failure  ,  and  an  emptiness  inside  that  couldn’t  be  filled  by  any  amount  of  curses  .    (    thusly  ,  he  didn’t  know  if  he  could  put  forth  the  kind  of  effort  it  would  take  to  spend  the  duration  of  an  entire  film  with  satoru  .  sure  ,  it  was  a  rare  crossing  moment  in  their  new  schedules  that  allowed  for  the  small  opportunity  to  even  speak  to  one  another  anymore  .  .  .    but  even  when  presented  with  the  chance  on  a  golden  platter  ,  suguru  ,  shamefully  ,  couldn’t  take  it  with  an  old  smile  .   every  time  he  looked  at  his  partner  ,  he  saw  the  expression  of  death  from  that  day  .  suguru  had  let  him  down  ,  let  everyone  down  ,  &  there  was  no  redeeming  himself  .  a  half  dead  man  with  one  foot  in  the  grave  and  one  upon  the  earth  .  the  honored  one  .  the  strongest  .    maybe  there  was  just  no  place  next  to  satoru  anymore  .   )                ❝     .    .    .      you  have  more  important  things  to  do  than  waste  time  with  me  ,  don’t  you  ?    maybe  focus  on  that  instead    .    .    .     ❞     /    @godsbox​  

( okay , at first suguru just laughs the question off , as if it were unthinkable . . . because to suguru , it was indeed unthinkable . what poor soul would put up with him like that anyway ? . . . before he realizes satoru's absolutely serious , and not letting him shrug it off like any other question the other asks him . ) ❝   who the hell would be dating me ?    ❞ he awkwardly asks , putting his hand against his chin in a mockery of thoughtfulness ; he didn't have to think about an answer , but he did have to tease just a little . ❝   ha , no , the answer's nobody , why ? are you dating somebody i should know about ?    ❞