Sighhhh…. I missed my husband <33

And since it’s mermay—War boy and Love as fishies <333

hi yes hello, it’s me again, crawling out of the void with yet another “what if god but messy” fic. ✨ this is basically a SAGAU crack epic where i, the Player™️, descend into teyvat, slap the respawn button on everyone, and turn canon into a giant uno reverse card. consider it my self-indulgent new game+ therapy session.

things you can expect:

me openly bullying celestia bc they deserve it.

reviving dead characters like i’m oprah handing out free cars (“YOU get a resurrection, YOU get a resurrection—”)

zhongli’s 5,000 years of emotional repression finally snapping like a glowstick.

tumblr-chaos narration because i literally cannot take myself seriously.

lore accuracy? i don’t know her.

this fic is like 60% angst, 40% shitpost, and 100% me refusing to let hoyoverse hurt my blorbos. enjoy. 🫶

So. Picture this: You, the humble Player™. Sitting in your room, bored out of your skull, staring at the Genshin loading screen for the 999th time.

But this time, instead of loading into Mondstadt to go beat up hilichurls for daily commissions like usual, you suddenly feel yourself falling.

Like—straight up Alice in Wonderland, but with worse gravity settings.

You hit the ground in Teyvat. Alive. Breathing. Very much not behind a screen anymore.

And everyone is staring at you.

The Archons? Panicking. The Adepti? Ready to bow. Celestia? Glitching in the background like a bugged skybox.

Meanwhile you? You dust your hands off and announce, with the gravitas of someone who just ragequit a bad gacha pull:

“Alright, patch notes time. New save file. No dead people allowed. Canon’s canceled. I’m God now, hi.”

The silence is deafening. Venti’s jaw drops. Zhongli freezes mid-step. Ei blinks like someone just unplugged her whole brain.

You clap your hands together. “Okay, first order of business: Liyue. Let’s fix Morax’s tragic backstory speedrun, shall we?”

And without further ado, you teleport.

Liyue Arc: Guizhong.exe Has Logged Back In

The air in Guili Plains tastes like nostalgia and regret. Zhongli stands stiffly at your side, staff in hand, while the Adepti hover in the distance.

“Young one,” Cloud Retainer says, voice echoing, “I do not comprehend the full extent of your—”

“Yeah, yeah, exposition later,” you interrupt. “Right now we’re doing a little thing I like to call CTRL+Z on trauma.”

And you snap your fingers.

The earth rumbles. The ruins of Guili glow. Stone blossoms unfurl, light pouring from every crack in the ground.

And then—soft footsteps. A figure in white and silver, smiling as if she’d never left.

Guizhong.

“Morax?” she whispers.

Zhongli—Zhongli—drops his idk... rock? It clatters to the stones. His knees nearly buckle. For once, the man with more composure than an iceberg looks like he’s been gutted.

“Guizhong…” His voice breaks like old porcelain. “This… this cannot be—”

“Oh, it’s real,” you say cheerfully, sipping the boba tea you conjured because why not. “Welcome back, dusty baddie.”

Guizhong tilts her head at you, bemused but gentle, before turning back to Zhongli. She lifts a hand, cups his cheek, and for the first time in millennia, he leans into her touch.

“Morax..... uh, you’ve aged so well.”

He actually laughs—half a sob, half disbelief. His golden eyes glisten.

Behind you, the Adepti are losing it. Moon Carver actually covers his face. Mountain Shaper mutters, “Impossible.” Cloud Retainer’s voice warbles like she’s about to sob some shit.

But you’re not done. Oh no. Because Guizhong was only part one.

You clap your hands together. “Alright, bonus DLC time: Yaksha Reunion Tour.”

Liyue Arc: The Yakshas Return

The ground shakes harder this time. Black karmic miasma that’s clung to Liyue for millennia suddenly dissolves, like smoke in the wind.

And then they step forward.

Bosacius. Bonanus. Indarias. Menogias. Tralalero Tralala.

The lost Yakshas. +1

Xiao freezes. His polearm slips from his grasp, clattering to the stone. His breath catches in his throat.

“…No.” His voice is barely a whisper. “…You’re not real.”

Bosacius laughs, loud and warm, clapping him on the shoulder so hard Xiao nearly topples. “Still short, huh?”

“Xiao!” Bonanus immediately fusses over him, grabbing his face. “You’re skin and bones! Did you stop eating again? I swear—”

Indarias ruffles his hair mercilessly. Menogias just smiles that soft, steady smile Xiao remembers from his nightmares and dreams alike.

And Xiao—stoic, silent, hardened Xiao—breaks.

He collapses to his knees, shoulders shaking, sobbing into Bosacius’s chest as his comrades swarm him in an embrace that looks like it’ll never break again.

You’re sitting cross-legged on a rock, slurping your boba, tears streaming down your face anyway.

“Yep. Worth it. This patch rules.”

The Adepti? Absolutely gone. Cloud Retainer’s voice cracks as she mutters, “The five… together again.” Moon Carver turns away, tears running down his muzzle. Even Mountain Shaper is sniffling.

Guizhong smiles, watching them all, before looking at Zhongli again. “You’ve carried so much, Morax. But you don’t have to anymore.”

And Zhongli—Zhongli, who has carried wars, nations, gods—finally allows himself to sag against her shoulder.

The Yakshas laugh and cry, Xiao buried in the arms of the only family he’s ever had.

The Adepti weep.

Zhongli trembles.

And you, God-Player Extraordinaire, raise your cup and declare:

“Ladies, gents, and enbies— Liyue’s trauma speedrun has officially been canceled. You’re welcome.”

Mondstadt Arc: The Family Reunion Special

Mondstadt greets you with wine, song, and the faint smell of someone making bad choices at the tavern. (Spoiler: it’s always Venti.)

But you didn’t come here for dandelion wine. No, you came here to fix Mondstadt’s pile of trauma corpses.

You clap your hands. “Alright, step one: bring back the Falcon baddie.”

The Anemo wind howls, feathers scatter, and out steps Vanessa—tall, radiant, carrying the aura of freedom itself.

The Knights of Favonius collectively scream.

“...Oh my Archons,” Jean gasps, hand over her heart. Amber drops her bow. Eula chokes on her own spit. Even Kaeya—smiling bastard extraordinaire—looks like someone just erased his poker face.

Vanessa tilts her head, surveying the crowd, then immediately starts barking orders. “You. Straighten your stance. You—your shield is too low. Mondstadt’s defenses are sloppy.”

The Knights fall over themselves obeying. Jean nearly faints. Amber salutes like her life depends on it.

Kaeya mutters under his breath, “Oh, she’s terrifying. I like her.”

Meanwhile, you’re cackling like a maniac. “Yes, queen, whip them into shape.”

Venti, for once, is quiet. Watching her. There’s reverence in his eyes. He bows his head, whispering, “Falcon of the West… you’ve returned.”

But you’re not done yet.

“Oh no,” you say, pulling a lyre out of thin air. “Guess who else I’m bringing back for emotional devastation.”

The wind sings. Notes flutter in the air. And then—soft footsteps. A voice, clear as spring water.

The Nameless Bard.

Venti’s head jerks up. His eyes go wide. His entire body freezes.

“...No.” His voice cracks. “No, it can’t be—”

The Bard smiles. “My friend... did you really think I’d leave you alone with the job?”

And Venti—Archon, drunk, eternal, whimsical Venti—breaks.

He rushes forward, grabbing the Bard by the shoulders, clutching him like he’ll vanish again. Tears stream down his face, his voice shaking.

“I—I watched you die. I held your lyre. I—”

“Yeah, well,” the Bard interrupts gently, resting a hand over Venti’s heart, “turns out your God’s got better respawn settings than Celestia.” He tilts his head at you. “Thanks, stranger.” sheeshfourthwallbreaking

You lift your boba in salute. “Anytime, king. Now sing him something before I start crying harder than him.”

Venti and the Bard collapse into a duet, voices twining together, laughter breaking through tears. Mondstadt gathers to listen, and for once, it feels whole.

But you’re still not done.

Because there’s a certain man with a certain winery. And a certain tragic son with daddy issues.

You clap your hands. “Alright, Ragnvindr family reunion, let’s go.”

And from the mist—Crepus Ragnvindr.

Diluc is halfway through polishing a glass at Angel’s Share when the room goes dead silent.

“...Father?” His hand trembles. The glass shatters on the counter.

Crepus steps forward, solid, real, smiling warmly. “Diluc. My boy. You’ve grown so strong.”

Diluc doesn’t move. Doesn’t breathe. For a long moment, he’s a statue. Then suddenly he’s across the tavern, gripping his father’s shoulders with white knuckles, staring into his face like it might dissolve.

Kaeya appears in the doorway, eyes wide. His mouth opens, then closes, then opens again.

“...Oh,” Kaeya says weakly. “This is gonna be… complicated.”

You lean back on a barstool, eating popcorn. “Family therapy speedrun, baby.”

Diluc clings to his father. Kaeya hovers awkwardly until Crepus drags him into the hug too, because he’s a dad like that.

And then, because you can’t resist:

“Hey Timmy, come here a sec.”

The kid toddles over, suspicious, still bitter about the pigeons.

“Want your dad back?” you ask casually.

The kid blinks. “...What?”

You snap your fingers.

A weathered man with kind eyes appears by the fountain. He freezes, then spots Timmy. “...Son?”

Timmy’s eyes widen. His mouth opens, closes, then he lets out a wail that rattles the whole plaza. He sprints forward, throwing himself into his father’s arms.

The entire city bursts into tears. Even Kaeya is wiping his eye.

And you? You cross your arms and announce to the skies:

“TIMMY LORE: FIXED.” “TIMMY LORE: FIXED.”

Snezhnaya Arc: Harbinger Hell

Teleporting into Zapolyarny Palace is like stepping into a cutscene you weren’t supposed to access yet.

The Fatui Harbingers are gathered. The air is colder than your ex’s texts. Pierro sits at the head of the table, looking like he hasn’t smiled since Khaenri’ah fell.

Perfect setup.

You kick open the door. “HEY BESTIES, GUESS WHO I’M BRINGING BACK.”

The Harbingers snap to attention. Weapons flare. Dottore already has three clones out. Childe looks like he’s about to throw hands.

And then she steps in.

Rosalyne-Kruzchka Lohefalter. The Crimson Witch. Signora.

The room implodes.

Childe’s jaw drops. “...Lady Rosalyne?”

Pulcinella makes a noise like a dying chicken. Sandrone actually drops her puppet. Even Dottore’s clones stutter.

Pierro… Pierro stops breathing.

Rosalyne smirks, tilting her head. “Miss me, darlings?”

Childe straight-up cries. Like ugly cries. He rushes forward, grabbing her hand, babbling something about “I thought you were gone—” before she cuts him off with a sharp ruffle of his hair.

“Pathetic,” she says affectionately.

Pierro, stone-faced, finally moves. He stands, approaches her slowly, like he’s afraid she’ll vanish. His mask tilts just enough for you to see his mouth tremble.

“Rosalyne,” he rasps.

“Pierro.” She smiles. “You still brood like an old dog.”

“...Speaking of dogs,” you say loudly, because you cannot resist. “Fetch.”

And with a snap of your fingers—Pierro’s dog materializes.

The First Harbinger—the stern, calculating, terrifying Pierro—falls to his knees. The massive, fluffy mutt barrels into him, tail wagging, licking his face.

Pierro drops his staff and clutches the dog, actually laughing—a low, broken sound. The Harbingers gape like their brains just blue-screened.

You fold your arms. “Yep. Trauma patch installed. You’re welcome.”

Signora leans back against the table, smirking at the chaos. “Well, this is going to be fun.”

Sumeru Arc: The Desert Wakes, The Bloom Returns

Enter: Chaos God Player

By now, Teyvat’s gotten used to your nonsense. Sort of. (They haven’t. Nobody has. They just pretend.) Every nation’s still reeling from the earlier “no dead people allowed” policy patch, and then suddenly you appear in Sumeru.

And when you appear, it’s not quiet. Oh no. You slam down into Aaru Village square like a Tumblr blog with 200 unread asks: loud, chaotic, and very much not prepared to be serious.

“Okay desert,” you clap your hands, “let’s see what DLC content you’re hiding. Where’s my big red pyramid man? Where’s my flower mom? Where’s—wait hold up—where’s Jett’s dad???”

Candace nearly drops her spear. Dehya stops mid-bite of kebab. Cyno is trying very hard not to do a pun because this feels like a religious experience but also extremely meme-worthy.

wasup sandy bois King Deshret.exe has logged in

When you finally revive King Deshret, it is, to be blunt, a server crash.

One minute the desert is still, dry, mournful; the next minute a colossal presence erupts like a volcano. The pyramid temples hum, golden light burns across the dunes, and then—there he is.

Not a statue. Not a ghost. Not a memory. A full-blown, very-much-alive King Deshret, standing with molten eyes that scream “hello, yes, I am your dad AND your god AND your catastrophic lore bomb, what’s up.”

And you? You’re just standing there sipping boba. “Sup. Welcome back. Don’t destroy the planet, pls. we dun hv another adult nahida version takin the sacrifice, thx."

Nahida appears via teleport like she just ragequit a Discord call and rejoined. “YOU—YOU CAN’T JUST—DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS—”

“Yeah,” you say. “Lore patch: tragedy deleted. Now go hug your 8-foot-tall sun dad, shrub.”

Nahida, who has been holding Sumeru’s trauma on her tiny shoulders for five hundred years, actually bursts into tears. Deshret kneels, scooping her up like he never vanished. The desert literally blooms at his touch, golden lotuses spreading where his footsteps fall.

Twitter (if Teyvat had it) would break.

shalalalala The Flower Goddess Returns

But you’re not done. Oh no. You scan the air dramatically. “WHERE is my Flower Wife.”

The desert suddenly smells like spring rain and dreamwine. The Flower Goddess, Nabu Malikata, steps out of what looks like a doorway carved from light itself.

She looks… impossibly gentle. A soft smile, robes trailing in petals, every inch of her whispering life, growth, kindness. When she sees Deshret alive again, the scream Nahida lets out could shatter Irminsul itself.

The three gods—Deshret, Greater Lord Rukkhadevata’s essence through Nahida, and Nabu Malikata—embrace in the desert sun. The holy trinity restored. Sumeru is bawling. Cyno, stone-faced, looks like he’s about to cry too but instead mutters, “I must remain… cactus-cool.”

You: “So basically I just dropped the Mother-Father DLC expansion. You’re welcome.”

Kaveh faints from joy and architecture stress simultaneously.

But wait, Jett’s Dad

This one hits harder. Because when you finally whisper your power into the bones of the desert and pull forth Jett’s father from the abyss, it’s not loud. It’s quiet.

The man stumbles forward in old mercenary gear, scarred and sun-baked, blinking at the light. His daughter freezes, weapon half-drawn, then drops everything to run into his arms.

The embrace is raw. Broken. Years of wandering and grief undone in an instant. Dehya has to physically walk away because it’s too much. Even Cyno mutters something about “justice being restored” while lowkey wiping his eyes.

You ruin the moment by slurping your boba dramatically. “Wholesome content unlocked. Achievement: Family Reunion.”

But deep down, you’re crying too. Cuz fuck their long ass quest.

Aftermath in Sumeru

Akademiya scholars are screaming in seventeen dialects because suddenly their “mythical” history just showed up in person.

Deshret is already planning desert infrastructure like a Minecraft dad with too much Redstone.

Malikata is teaching Nahida how to care for Irminsul like a mother hen.

Jett is clinging to her dad and refuses to let him leave her sight.

And you? You’re liveblogging it all in your divine Tumblr voice:

“Sumeru patch notes: sandy dad is back, flower mom is back, shrub baby is healing, desert trauma deleted. Also Cyno cried but don’t tell him I said that.”

Fontaine Arc: Ctrl+Z-ing Irminsul

Fontaine is already unstable (lawsuits, water levels, Furina’s everything) when you crash through like a gremlin god with too much free time.

“HELLO FOUNTAIN PEOPLE,” you announce. “Guess what? I hate memory erasure mechanics. Ctrl+Z time.”

Neuvillette tries to look composed but his tail is twitching. Furina is immediately on the floor screaming. Lyney, Lynette, and Freminet are side-eyeing you like “…are we about to get new siblings??”

And oh boy.

You reach into Irminsul’s roots like you’re dragging old Tumblr blogs out of the void, and suddenly names, faces, entire people start to exist again.

The missing siblings. The lovers forgotten. The parents wiped out by Celestia’s delete key.

People who were once “erased from history” are just walking around again, blinking like they woke up from a nap.

The city collectively loses its mind. Citizens reunite with loved ones they didn’t even know they lost. It’s a cascade of laughter and sobbing.

And you? You’re just like: “Lol canon is fake actually.”

dance kms queen for the sake of holy blood purification water Focalors.exe is BACK

Then, casually, you clap your hands. “Oh, almost forgot—Focalors, get out here.”

A familiar, radiant Hydro figure appears, eyes like stormy seas, posture full of playful dignity. The real Archon.

Furina. Screams. So loud. She clutches her wig (which is real hair, but still). “I—BUT—I—?!?!”

Neuvillette literally drops his composure for half a second. His voice rumbles like a storm: “…my Lady.”

The reunion is earth-shattering. Furina collapses into Focalors’s arms, sobbing incoherently, while Focalors comforts her with infinite patience. The people of Fontaine are shook beyond words.

You, sipping tea: “Anyway, you now have two Hydro Archons. Consider it a BOGO sale.”

Aftermath in Fontaine

The Court is a hot mess. Trials have to be re-opened, families restored, whole lineages re-acknowledged.

Furina is being force-fed soup by Focalors for the first time in centuries.

Neuvillette is crying dragon tears but trying to act like he isn’t. Spoiler: he is.

Lyney, Lynette, and Freminet are wondering if you can bring back their biological parents just because you feel like it.

And you, of course, are posting on Divine Tumblr:

“Fontaine patch notes: history un-deleted, Hydro Mom 2.0 unlocked, Furina now has parental supervision, Dragon Dad got his therapy session. You’re welcome.”

Natlan Arc: Dragons, Fire, and the Guy With Too Much Armor

You descend into Natlan like a Tumblr blogger who just found a new hyperfixation.

The people are mid-festival, fire dancing under the sun, dragons circling in the sky—and then BOOM. The sky splits open with your dramatic “✨God Has Arrived✨” entrance.

Everyone freezes. A child drops their roasted meat skewer. A dragon literally screeches and does a backflip midair.

And you? You just clap your hands and go: “ALRIGHT NATLAN. PATCH TIME. SOMEONE GO FETCH ME THAT ONE BIG ARMOR BOY. YEAH, THE EDGE-LORD ONE. CAPITANO.EXE IS GETTING UN-DELETED.”

The people of Natlan: “??????”

The Capitano Revival

Here’s the thing. Capitano isn’t supposed to be here. He’s Fatui, he’s supposed to be far away, he’s supposed to be… dead? lost? erased? Lore unclear. Doesn’t matter. You just grab him out of wherever Celestia threw him and drop him in front of Natlan’s fire pit like a DLC character reveal.

The crowd goes SILENT.

The man is huge. Impossibly huge. His armor glints like night itself. He takes one look around, realizes he’s in his homeland, and his hand trembles.

He drops to his knees in the dirt of Natlan. His voice is a rasp: “…home?”

And you’re just like, “Yep. Respawned you. Boredom patch. You’re welcome, Metal Dad.”

The chieftains and elders are losing their MINDS. Some cry. Some scream. Some bow. Because this man is a legend, and he’s here. Alive.

Capitano doesn’t even try to keep it together. The Natlan dragon-lords descend, sniff him like big cats, and accept him back.

It’s an emotional trainwreck. The nation is shaking. And you’re on the sidelines drinking Capri-Sun like: “Lore bomb dropped, who’s next.”

Aftermath: A New Teyvat

The continent is in chaos—but for once, it’s good chaos.

Families are whole.

Archons are no longer haunted by grief.

Nations celebrate, confused but happy.

Celestia is probably having a stroke.

And you? You sit on a divine throne made of Tumblr memes, sipping your drink, updating your blog:

Divine Patch Notes Final:

“Anyway,” you say aloud, smirking at the Traveler, “game cleared. No one dies on my watch. You’re welcome :)"

Every nation now worships you not just as a god, but as a Tumblr shitposter incarnate. Shrines are built with quotes like “lore deleted, deal with it” engraved on the walls.

The people pray, laugh, and live without fear of loss.

And somewhere above, Celestia looks down, watching the world they once controlled spiral into chaos. Their carefully written tragedies undone, their power shattered.

They whisper, terrified:

“What… are they?”

And somewhere in a shrine, a devout follower answers for you:

“They’re our Player. They’re our God. And they’re bored out of their mind.”

The end.

wow. that was. a lot. 💀 if you made it all the way here, congratulations————you have survived my 30k-word emotional rollercoaster disguised as a tumblr crackpost.

final thoughts:

canon is dead. i killed it and then revived it for comedy.

every character you love is alive now. you’re welcome.

did i fix genshin impact lore or did i make it 10x more unhinged? the answer is yes.

this fic doubles as a therapy substitute and a tumblr liveblog from hell.

anyway, thanks for reading, don’t forget to like, reblog, and sacrifice your daily commissions to me, your local chaos god ✨🙏✨

oh my god anon when I tell you this is the coolest fucking idea ever 😭😭 ; and don't worry this isn't too specific or anything at all!!! I'm definitely gonna try and deliver trust me ; thank you so much for requesting, hope you enjoy!!! ; this lowkey sucks but an attempt was made 😔 ; also this is kind of like a situationship type deal, like reader is literally god and five is just some dude who shouldn't even exist and shit djdnksjd idk

FIVE HARGREEVES ; everything everywhere all at once

summary ; after finally meeting one of the assholes fucking with the universe, you try and answer all your questions

warnings ; language, mentions of death, mentions of throwing up, overuse of stupid jokes, reader being referred to as God a lot, also one of my longest oneshots (still balls)

word count ; 2.8k

masterlist

Viktor x God/ess!reader

Synopsis-Viktor is in the verge of death, only a forgotten god can bring him back; what’s his fate?

cw- character death, bad writing, god!reader, writer watched what if when she started this, sexual undertones, kissing, reader is referred as ‘you’, uhhh I gen don’t know what else to put 😭

“I could be the doctor, I can cure your disease…”

Mortals. Primitive, selfish beings, they take so much but give so little. They don’t know it always comes back to bite them in the end.

Jayce eyes shoot open taking in painful gasps of air, delirious he stands up on wobbly legs. Looking around he’s horrified by the carnage that surrounded him. Where the council room once stood only rubble and mangled corpses of the councilors take its place. His breathing quickened, Mel. He searched frantically finding her incoherent, he helped her to her feet before his heart stopped. Viktor.

“Shit. Shit. Shit.” Jayce cursed himself before he realized he found his best friend, his partner's body; broken and bloody. Jayce ran towards the dying man. “No, no Vik come on stay with me.” The Talis boy cried, ripping Viktors dirty button, pushing up and down on his chest, hearing the crack of a rib with every compression he gave. His vision went blurry with tears. Viktor couldn’t die, Jayce wouldn’t let him. This isn’t working. I need to get to the lab. Was all Jayce could think, lifting Viktor off the floor racing to their lab.

He threw Viktor down, going through everything he possibly could to save him. There was nothing. How could this be? All those endless nights in the lab, countless nights gone with sleep, how many times they had to run over their morals for the greater good. How could this be? Jayce slammed his hands down on the stretcher Viktors body lies. He hadn’t realized he began crying again. And this time he couldn’t stop. “Please, please, anyone save him. Save my partner. Save Viktor.” He cried out into the air, it was insane, he knew nothing could hear him, help him. He was alone.

•

•

•

“Save him…. Save Viktor.”

Your ears rang over and over, the same phrase repeated over and over and over again until it was scorched into your brain. “Fine. Fine, Fine!” You grimaced walking up the invisible stairs into a room unlike any other; a room full of mirrors all differing in shapes and sizes.

You could see into any universe through these mirrors , anywhere anytime, everywhere all at once. You flowed through time and space, keeping the contingency in balance; but the punny little mortal kept disturbing you. Looking through one of the mirrors you touched the middle of the portal closing your eyes focusing all your energy to find that one little speck. Your terrestrial energy hummed around you; your plane of existence shaking all around you as if a glass ball under pressure about to shatter. Gotcha.

The fog of the portal disappeared and in it replaced a beautifully devastating scene, where one single action could create a new branch of reality. But this man doesn’t seem to be doing anything, but cry.

He was quite pitiful. The other man, the one he cried over, close to death if not already there. An essence radiated all through his dying body, you could feel the power he could hold. What a waste of potential.

You listened closely as the male pleaded and pleaded. “Save him,” he wailed. “I’ll do anything, give anything.” But it wasn’t him you wanted.

You bargained with yourself, if you saved the dying man you could have another soul, another disciple. But then your oath, if you broke then who knows what the Watchers would do.

“But, the Watchers haven’t been heard from in millenniums. I’m sure one life does not matter.” You mutter to yourself taking in a deep breath before you reach into the mirror grabbing Viktors hand and pull his soul from his body and bring him into your realm.

Viktor awoke gasping for air, he looked around panic feeling out his nerves. There was nothing, actually nothing but white, he was in a blindingly white room with no doors apparently. He looked down and saw his body, that was definitely not his. Where his metal protected body once was a white void takes his place, it didn’t feel like his body but a replica of what once was. Just as he went to find a way out a voice caught him. “Finally you’re awake I was wondering when you would—“

“Who are you?” Viktor cut you off from giving your gracious welcome speech, he studied you as you gathered yourself from his rude barbaric homosapien ways. You were indescribable, you went above all meanings of magic or logic he has ever known. Your body was like his but different. Colors of deep hue swished through your glorious temple, unlike his body yours blended with the void as if you bent it to your will. You floated around him ten times his size, terrifyingly beautiful.

“I am everything and nothing.”

“What do you mean?”

You don’t answer him, only swaying back and forth studying the statue in front of you, having truly forgotten how little human bodies can be.

“I heard your mortal man beg for your life, pleading for your soul's salvation.. I can give you salvation, Viktor.” You hummed only bringing Viktor deeper into your symphony of madness. “I can cure your disease.”

“What disease.” If all he can say through all this lunacy. “The disease of death.” You continued voiced strained almost as of this was exciting you, the longer you went on the clearer everything became, the blast killed him and this must be his hell.

“If I am to live again there will be a logical– a right way to do it.” Viktor tried to rebuttal your divine interference.

“Nothing can save you, no medicine, nor any human magic. But I can be your anecdote” You moved so fast Viktor couldn’t even catch your face as you moved back and forth.

“What.. I don’t– I don’t believe this.”

“I can make you believe.” You suddenly disappeared just for Viktor to feel a hand drag down his back.

“You are the flesh maggots adore,” you whisper into his ear, hands feeling his body up. “But I can make you so much more.” Your voice entranced him, enchanting his soul. “What do you mean?”

“I mean you’ll transcend any and everything you’ve ever done on that little speck of a planet of yours.”

“How?”

Gosh the questions have mortals always been this annoying?

“I’ll merge the smallest piece of my soul and I'll exchange and you will give me yours.” You explain an exaggerated smile stitched on your small, your face muscles strain he was concerned for you, they would surely cramp if you continued.

“My what?”

“Oh my— your soul. What else?” You look at him as if he was an insolent child and to you he was.

Viktor, well he was calculating whether or not this could be real or not. How out of 1 million probabilities this is the afterlife he was stuck with and if he was lucky this is all a dream and he’ll awake in a hospital, maybe a little sore, but definitely not survived by a forgotten god. As if hearing his thoughts the creature before him pushed him on the ground, straddling him.

“Forgotten’s a harsh word, I’d like to think of it as temporarily disposed of. And like I said before,” you spoke softly, hands caressing his shoulders and face, Viktor’s stomach clenched an unfamiliar and unwelcome warmth filling his body. “No human medicine will work for you. Only I can help you, so let me cure you.” You looked into his eyes, no deeper. It was as if you were connecting with his very being, so he definitely wasn’t thinking with the next words he uttered.

“Fine.”

He gave in way quicker than you thought, you smiled delighted. Getting off of him quickly and lead him to another place of whatever plane of existence you were on. This time there was one thing, a huge pitch black temple, the sculpture looks as if made at the depths of Tartarus. It made one quite unsettled how off it looked compared to the heavenly light that could burn one’s eyes out blazing behind it.

But one thing Viktor was thinking, was how big this place is.

When you two reached the temple and he looked back to you, you had a much more serious expression, your angelic features scrunching up to make an unnatural scowl. He could tell you were never meant to be unhappy.

“Kneel.” Your instruction cut through his ears, slicing his eardrums. Your demand was quite painful. You looked back remorse painting your eyes. But you had to remain in control.

As you knelt beside him you dipped your hand into a golden dish filled with water as pitch as the temple. He hadn’t even realized what was in front of them. An altar. Dawned with candles that never melted, flowers that never wilted, fruit that would never rot. Unfamiliar Oil aromas mixed into his nostrils. Four cups each different in size and style sit on their own corner on the altarpiece. Who knew immortal beings have their own gods?

“Please ancient gods, forgive us for our mortal sins…” you whispered an unintelligible prayer, dipping in the gold dish four separate times kissing your hands in between the dips. You poured all different elements along with the water into a different golden cup. Then you grabbed each chalice and poured blood-like tar out of each speaking what Viktor assumed were names, that even he couldn’t pronounce.

“As you have sacrificed for us we shall for you.”

That caught his attention. He couldn’t even speak when you grab his hand and without a knife cut his hand open with the tip of your fingernail. “W-wha…” He couldn’t even speak as you did the same, your blood pouring out the same as he. He held his hand hissing at the burning pain and you just groaned, snatching his hand back. “Stop being a baby.” You say healing the cut with a wave of your hand over his.

“Now drink.” She said, bringing the golden chalice to his lips deaconing him on. His lips touched the liquid gulping four times, it was bitter and tasted like death.

He watched you as you downed the rest, the red drink dripping down your chest. You look back at him, a new ferocity freed from your soul, grabbing the sides of his perfectly aligned face and smash your lips into his. Viktor was taken aback, he tried to push you away but you were too strong and suddenly he found himself falling into the kiss. Your warm muscle found his lips parting them biting his lip so hard he bleed the metallic taste feeling up your mouth and before he could try and push away it felt as if something was being shoved down his throat. It was excruciating, excessive, euphoric.

As you merged yourself using all your will to not consume his entire being, Viktor felt as if he was at the top of the world. His eyes rolled back in ecstasy, never having felt this much pleasure before it was unreal, unnatural and he needed more.

He grabbed your arms pulling your inhabited body closer, his body sparked a new energy, a powerful energy all through your body, it made you lust for more. Your soul's powerful emergence created a light, The light that was both of you, burned brighter and brighter until it combusted stabbing the white voided room into a black hole.

And then Viktor was gone.

•

•

•

“They broke the oath.” A deep, dark voice spoke.

“This cannot be.” A jittery one shuttered.

“An act of rebellion I tell you. Who knows any deity now will think they can do whatever they want no respect—“ An old shriveled on spouted on and on.

“Quiet.” Said the fourth voice, all falling silent . “They will be dealt with accordingly, but first let’s see what they are planning…..”

Part 1(You’re here!) part 2 part 3

Everyone knew who their creator was. (Name), the divine creator of Teyvat, the one who even Celestia prayed to and so did the seven archons. There was no beast, no animal, no human, no god, no being that didn’t hold him in the highest pedestal of all.

They celebrated in his name, killed in his name, fought on his name, drank on his name, and died on his name. He was the poet, the knight, and the king, he was all, is all.

From the warm summers of Liyue, to the cold winters of Snezhnaya. Their grace was praised.

The joy they all felt when the golden vessel came was unimaginable, joy that turned to jealousy. That vessel whose name was Aether wasn’t worthy of you, what could you see in this outsider? Was what every being wondered. Yet no one dared go against their divine god.

They knew you were watching them through those golden eyes, analyzing every movement and going through all the nations. Barbatos was ashamed of himself, he was unable to give you a proper welcome. Morax tried to stop his contract, he wanted to greet you personally, give you a tour and show you how well they were doing in comparison of Mondstadt. He couldn’t. He cursed himself for this, he should’ve waited more, he should’ve went after the Tsaritsa.

Ei was clueless and ashamed of her actions, how could she do this to you? She wanted to drop to her knees and beg for forgiveness but she couldn’t. Nahida was embarrassed, which is why she tried to be as helpful as she could. Furina and Neuvillette were both surprised and relieved at the same time, their nation wasn’t the worse one, surely you could understand that Celestia could be… difficult.

Aether took advantage of his title as the divine creator’s vessel to find his sister. He knew who you were, you were praised all throughout the stars and worlds yet he didn’t say a word to the archons. He quickly noticed that unlike his homeland, Teyvat was still a relatively young world. He marveled at the idea of being one of the first to know of your most recent work as the order still hadn’t added Teyvat into the system.

He forgot his sister for a moment.

He knew more of you than the others did. His mother had told him and his sister all about you in tales. While not much was known of your first life, they knew a lot of your second life, when you were introduced as Ethan of house Talix almost 6 billion years ago. The union between the goddess of knowledge and peace, and the god of life and nature. From that union was born a boy who held resemblance to the one who created life, Ethan.

He was told of how you overcame corruption and freed them all from the cruel world they built in your absence. How kind you were to go as far as reincarnating, breaking the rules you yourself had made, all to save them. They recognized their wrongdoings, they tainted the paradise you had built for them, it was only right for them to make it up for you. Aether was a bit… ashamed that Teyvat, a world that was still far too young and didn’t know all that history, acted so loyal since the start and followed your law.

Something this own homeland didn’t do… they had to see you be born again and suffer to free them for them to finally praise you as you deserved. They made you lose your life a second time.

…

Ethan, your grace, father, divine grace, your highness, prince, (Name)… who were you anymore? You didn’t know. From the start, you didn’t know. You were what everything else was, a mere atom floating around, well… many atoms that united like sticky balls to evolve. How long were you alone? Far enough to learn how to make others like you. You didn’t want worshippers or servants, you just wanted company. But of course, your wishes were always just dreams. So you kept yourself busy with building and making more life.

Fixing their problems, you learned to tolerate their “gifts” that consisted on sacrifice. You accepted your deaths and rebirths, as if you hadn’t already tried to completely eliminate yourself from existence. Not like a knife of divine blood to the heart, a curse to your soul, a night of bleeding out or being burned alive could do anything to you.

When you awoke in Teyvat you felt the same way as in those other planets, numb. Yet the smell of a warm meal made the hunger in your human body awake. That was the only thing that encouraged you to rise from the ground.

Prev/Next(Later)

He wasn't really sure on how he had met You.

He had multiple memories of his encounters with you but he was always uncertain on which one was actually the truth. Now that he thought about it, this feeling of skepticism was most definitely your doing or atleast was because of you in general.

Who would've guessed?

Like a Mc from another universe who is the god of Envy and The sea. They would either clash or get along with Levi.

Or God of Wine and Pride! MC x Lucifer

God of Gold and Greed! MC x Mammon

God of beauty and seduction MC x Asmodeus

God of Mischief and Lazyness MC x Belphegor

God of Cooking and Strength MC x Beelzebub

God of Knowledge and Enragement MC x Satan

Or all together

God of Sin/God of Devil's MC x brothers and even side characters.

MC coming from a world like the Greek gods, where they all have specific gods.

“Gods aren’t called upon, rather, they are made. They are made with blood and tears and the strain of muscles; bones crushed under the feet of the first ‘heretic’ prophet to preach your gospel. Gods are made in battle, in the solace of the night skies, or, in your case at least, in the obsession of one human; your prophet, with you as their muse.”

God!reader x m! or gn!worshipper