"...We know those are udon noodles."
- Mind flayer, about the goblins' attempt to disguise as illithid

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"...We know those are udon noodles."
- Mind flayer, about the goblins' attempt to disguise as illithid

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Goblin Barbarian: Hey! I have an Arcana bigger than zero. Its a negative one! Goblin Cleric: C'mon, we've told you about the numbers that have the little dash in front of them… Goblin Barbarian: Yeah, those are the fast ones.
Goblin Barbarian: I buy a babydoll tee. Goblin Cleric: Is that babydoll sized for a goblin, or babydoll sized for a human so that it fits a goblin like a dress? Goblin Barbarian: No, it's a tee sized for a babydoll. I'm a little guy!
Goblin Rogue: How are those boards supposed to be good weapons?? They're too light. Don't they float in water? Goblin Barbarian: Yeah. But ducks float in water too. And they make great weapons! Goblin Rogue: Oh yeah, good point.